Chapter 6: Things Fall Apart
Touya found himself feeling worse and worse by the day. The crush he'd assumed would originally wither away only intensified as he and Yukito grew more and more engulfed in rehearsals in his room and in the kitchen. Touya tried to throw every feeling he was getting into his studying and acting, but with the boy there, it was just difficult to concentrate. Everything Yukito did was distracting. His smile, his eating, the way he laid or sat or stood, the way he spoke… it was too much, just too much!
Why does he have to be so effeminate and cute?! Touya wondered in frustration while sitting across from him at lunch.
Yukito obliviously ate away at his oversized lunch, a look of glee upon his face. Touya stared at him longingly, at a loss for what to do.
Should I…confess? I mean…maybe if I told him, it'd go away, but…what if he gets all bugged out over it? I can't do that…but if I don't, I'll go insane!…Man…
"TOUYA!!!" Nakuru threw her arms around him, nuzzling him. It never ceased to amaze him how she could appear out of nowhere like that.
Touya became completely rigid, a vein popping on his forehead. "Hello, Akizuki…" He grumbled.
"Oh, come ON!!! Call me Nakuru, Touya, please?" She stressed her words so much that they dragged on forever, aggravating him even more than her presence.
"I saw you practicing yesterday, Akizuki-san," Yukito chimed. "You're so very good. I'm looking forward to the performance."
"See? He appreciates my talent," Nakuru said to Touya. "You agree with whatever Yukito says, so you agree that I'm fabulous!"
"I don't agree with everything Yuki says," Touya growled. "Stop assuming things!"
"EEE-HEE-HEE-HEE! Someone's not a happy camper!" She giggled, plopping into his lap. "I can't wait for our performance together, Touya…" She leaned up close to his face, lips inches from his. "It will be… so… much fun… don't you think?" She shut her eyes.
In horror, Touya scooted his chair back so abruptly and stood so quickly that Nakuru toppled to the floor rather clumsily.
"Hey!" She whined.
"Stop trying to claim me! LEAVE ME ALONE!" Touya shouted, cheeks bright red. It wasn't that he really cared if Nakuru tried to steal his first kiss, but… Yuki was there… and that was who he wanted his kiss stolen from…
Nakuru pouted. "That wasn't very nice."
Touya turned and marched out of the room. His face was hot from embarrassment, anger, and confusion of feelings, and he needed to splash it down with so cold water.
"What's gotten into him?" Yukito asked, not realizing exactly what had taken place just now.
"I dunno," Nakuru shrugged, sitting in Touya's seat and picking off of his half-eaten lunch. She smiled. "It won't take that long though. Once the play begins, I'll have him. Time you threw in the towel now, eh, Snow Bunny?"
"What?" Yukito asked, confused.
"Nothing," She chuckled, taking the box lunch and skipping away.
Yukito stared after her in bewilderment. "I don't know if I'll ever understand that girl…"
-
Touya stared at his reflection, his face dripping with the water he'd splashed himself with. He cursed himself for his feelings.
"Why won't this go AWAY?!" He moaned, leaning his forehead onto the mirror. "This is KILLING ME!"
"What is?"
"GYAAAH!!" If he'd been any more frightened, he probably would have ripped the sink out of the wall.
Yazamaki beamed at him, eyes shut tightly as usual.
"Nothing…" Touya murmured.
"Is it the play? Is it rehearsal with your sports and schoolwork getting to you? Is it family troubles?"
"Yeah, sure…" Touya grumbled. "Use your imagination."
"Is it love?"
"NO!!" He shouted, turning bright red again.
"That means it is."
"N…Nuh-uh!"
"Yuh-huh."
"NUH-UH!"
Oh, THAT'S mature, you idiot, He scolded himself.
"Well, okay. Whatever you want to believe," He shrugged, turning to the door. "But… in my opinion, if you like someone, you should tell them how you feel. The worst you can get out of it is rejection, so you really haven't got anything to lose. Plus, you'll never know unless you try, and you might be pleasantly surprised. That's all."
He left, leaving Touya speechless.
Normally he thought Yamazaki was a spaz and air headed, much like his younger brother, but with this subject… for some reason, he almost felt like… he was…
Right?
-
Touya opened the door to his house, it quiet and empty. Yukito walked in, looking around. "Is your dad on an excavation?" He asked, noticing the emptiness as well.
"Yep, and Sakura's at practice until late."
"Oh, okay," Yukito nodded, smiling.
That means we're alone… Touya thought, shutting the door. Should I say something…? Should I do something?
"Are you hungry? I'm hungry," Yukito said, wandering into the kitchen. "I'm gonna get a snack."
Touya followed after him, digging his script out of his bag. I'll hold off on it until I… until I get the guts up to do something, who am I kidding? I'll never be able to do this! I must be crazy if I think I can do this…
He sat at the table, looking over some of the lines he wasn't sure of, but he pretty much had it memorized now. The play is in two days…He thought. I've got my lines, but can I pull it off?
He glanced up at Yukito who'd found a box of cookies and cutely bitten off of one like a rabbit would with a carrot. "Mm," He smiled. "These are fantastic! I must get some next time I go to the market!"
Touya's cheeks flushed. I think this is more difficult than the play…He's so adorable! ARGH!
"Ah, ah, ah, To-ya! No script for you," Yukito chuckled, taking it from him.
"Ah…" Touya mumbled. I use that thing to hide my face! Give it back, give it back, give it BACK, YUKI!
Yukito opened the script and they began to go over lines from the beginning, standing and choreographing as well. Touya's mind was racing the whole time on how he should tell his friend. Should he just come out and say it? Should he slide it out casually? Should he wait and buy him roses and candies and a secret admirer card? DID HE EVEN HAVE THE GUTS?! He certainly wasn't feeling like it… but…
"Have saints not lips, and holy palmers too?" Touya mumbled.
I can't deal…
"Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer," Yukito recited.
I'm going insane!!
"O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do; They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair…" Touya stammered, blushing.
Why these lines? Why now?!
"Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake."
Please, no!!
"Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take. Thus from my lips, b-by yours, my sin is purged…"
"Then have my lips the sin that they have took."
I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!
And Touya grabbed Yukito by the shoulders, pulled him forward and locked lips with him.
Yukito's eyes widened with shock, and he leaned back against the doorway to keep from falling.
Touya felt… he couldn't really explain… it felt like flashes of light burning inside of him, all over everywhere. He couldn't think clearly, his mind in a fog. His fingers and toes tingled as if he'd been struck by lightning, and colors danced behind his eyelids.
Finally, when he couldn't breathe anymore, he pulled away, gasping. As he regained his composure, he realized what he had done.
Yukito stared at him, stunned, trembling slightly.
There was silence between them.
Yukito stood up straight again, and grabbed his bag. He mumbled, "See you at school…" and he ran out, covering his mouth with his face.
"Yuki, wait!" Touya cried, reaching out for him, but he had zoomed off before he could catch him.
His shoulders slumped. "Ah… damn it! What have I done?!"
He slammed the door and punched the wall. "I'm SUCH AN IDIOT!" He screamed, stomping up the stairs. "I should have KNOWN BETTER! Now, he probably never speak to me again!"
He locked himself into his room and took a deep breath to calm his anger and self-hatred… and then despair came… and it hit him even harder than his fury.
Touya buried his head into his pillow, tears burning in his eyes and rolling down his cheeks. "I can't believe this…" He whimpered. "I hate this…"
-
"Kero-chan! What are you doing down here in the kitchen?" Sakura exclaimed.
"Huh? Oh, don't worry, you're dad won't be home for awhile and your brother's locked up in his room. I doubt he'll be down for the rest of the night."
"Huh? What's wrong with him? Is he sick?"
"I dunno," Kero shrugged, biting into a cookie that had been left on the table. "I heard doors slamming and him yelling, so he's probably upset. It's probably best if you just leave him alone…"
"Yeah," Sakura sighed. "I'll talk to him when he comes down… Poor Onii-chan… I hope he's okay…"