Disclaimer: I own kaput. (the made up characters belong to Smackthedog)

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CHAPTER FOUR : FEBRUARY (part one)

- O -

February, the "bad weather month". Speaking of which, it was now raining and thundering outside Ward and Irvine's imprisonment.

Irvine had finally gotten smart and Ward took off the electric collar, though he left the invisible fence up. Irvine had managed to sneak out and had pawned off enough of the things he had stolen to buy himself a PlayStation. Right now he was upstairs in his room playing it. He was on the final battle. And real close to taking down the ULTRA MONSTER, too.

Ward was downstairs watching a football game on his TV. He had a nice cold beer in one hand and the TV remote in the other. He was content for now. The only thing that could be better was if he was at his own home away from Irvine.

Things happened really fast.

The storm picked up and was beginning to really howl. Irvine was a few minutes away from defeating the ULTRA MONSTER. Ward's game was about to finish up-the two teams were tied and it had gone into third overtime. The lighting hit a tree, which fell. Irvine hit the ULTRA MONSTER the final time. Ward watched as the last touchdown was about to be made…5…4…3…2…

The tree hit a power line and the lights went out followed by the TVs and other electronics. That was followed by Irvine's loud wail of defeat, and Ward's cussing of annoyance.

"Irvine!" He roared from the bottom of the stairs. "What the hell did you do!?"

"Well," came Irvine's voice as he explained between sobs. "First I traveled through the seven levels of the Candy Cane Forest. Then over the Ocean Of Gumdrops…wait…that's not how it goes…"

"Shut up then and get down here!"

"Sir yes sir!"

"Shut up!"

"Okay…"

"I said shut up!"

"…"

"That's much better."

"You're welcome."

"SHUT! UP!"

Irvine eventually made it downstairs without Ward hurting him to badly and they discussed what they should do until the power came back on.

"We could play CandyLand." Irvine suggested.

"No."

"Poker?"

"No."

"Crazy Eights?"

"No."

"Monopoly?"

"No."

"Arm wrestle?"

"You'd lose."

"I know."

They sat in silence for awhile. Then Ward said, "Scrabble?"

"You're the boss, applesauce."

"Don't do that."

"Okay."

And so we join our 'heroes' a few hours later, playing a game of Scrabble by candlelight. …sigh….how romantic…

Irvine looked over the board. "Well, with your 'drain' I can spell out 'pain'." He did so and wrote down the points.

Ward looked at the board. "Can we use names?"

"Sure, why not?"

Ward put down "Chirese."

"Hmm…" Irvine looked over the board again. "With the 's' on 'Chirese' I can make 'sex—"

Ward glared at him and grabbed his big ol' harpoon.

"—ophone'. Saxophone…" Irvine finished.

"That's not how you spell it."

"This kind is."

"Oh really? Then what kind of item is it?"

"It's what happens when you break my back."

"Let's try it."

"HAHA. Maybe tomorrow."

They played for awhile later. As they played, they were each lost in their own thoughts.

Ward was thinking, You know, Irvine really isn't that bad. he could even be my adopted son, except for the fact he won't leave my daughter alone… If you think about it, we're bound to get along sooner or later. May as well be now.

While he played down some dirty words, Irvine was thinking, Ward really isn't that bad. His only bad quality is keeping Chirese and me apart…if it weren't for that, maybe we could get along. maybe I should try to make contact…

They looked up at each other at the same time…Just as Ward put down "Friends" on the board.

"Uh...um…How about 'Go Fish'?" Irvine asked nervously. He didn't like the way Ward was looking at him. IT wasn't evil or menacing…almost normal.

"Sure." Ward put the board away as Irvine found some cards.

As they played, their bond grew and grew. As Ward played his last, winning card, he stood up and hugged Irvine. Irvine hesitantly hugged him back.

As they sat there, thinking of all the things they might be able to accomplish if they were together-Irvine mainly thinking of Chirese-the lights came back on.

Ward's eyes popped open and he threw Irvine against the wall. "Yuck! Get your ass back upstairs and don't try to be nice to me to get your hands on Chirese!"

"B-but…" Irvine began as Ward advanced on him. "You hugged me first…I thought maybe…"

"UPSTAIRS! NOW!"

And things went back to normal.

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PART TWO : VALENTINES DAY SPECIAL

(take one)

For Valentines day, Irvine snuck out and managed to get to Chirese's house without Ward knowing—or so he thought. His plan was simple—leave the flowers and chocolate he had bought earlier on the door step and get back to his room before Ward knew he was gone. IT would have been safer to take the tunnel, yes, but it wasn't quite finished yet. And before it would be any easier, he planned on installing a little rail car thing to take him back and forth.

He put his plan into action. Ward had been watching a ball game and appeared to be hypnotized and completely oblivious to everything around him. Irvine had an easy time getting out of the house—Until the door slammed shut.

He sprinted the first few miles to Chirese's, then caught a bus, which didn't stop until it left the neighborhood, so he had to jump off the roof when he was another mile away from the house.

He sprinted the rest of the way and set the gifts on the doorstep. Then he rang to doorbell, as he stood there panting, he heard footsteps coming to the door.

Heavy footsteps…

"OH SHIT."

Irvine tried to run, but he was too late. The door swung open and Ward's fist collided with Irvine's face.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Irvine flew back in slow motion. "HHOOOWWW DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDDD YYYOOOOUUUU BEEEAAATT MEEEEE!?"

Ward waved and grinned in slow motion. "IIIII DDRROOOOOVVVE!!

"GOOOO FIIIIGGUUURRE!" Irvine said before landing about a mile away and then was engulfed by a nuclear explosion.

- o -

(take two)

This time Irvine just walked to Chirese's house, after getting the electric collar off and turning on the stereo and locking his door. This way he would have enough energy to run if he needed to. He put the candy and flowers on the doorstep, but this time he rang the doorbell and ran off.

But Ward had been aware of Irvine's determination. He had made sure Kyle and Jessie would take care of it all so he could watch the game and not be bothered. The two boys came out of the house after Irvine left and replaced his candy with their own.

"Got the 'shitty worm candy'?"

"Check. Got the 'poison ivy flowers?"

"Yup."

They rang the doorbell and left.

Tomo answered it and wrinkled her nose at the stench of the gift. "Chirese? It's for thou."

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Later that night as Irvine sat in bed, he heard the doorbell ring and went to answer it. On the doorstep was a box of (smelly) candy and some flowers. Irvine ate on of the strange tasting candies as he read the attached note.

Dear Irivne

Happy Vday!

-Chirese