Chapter 8: We're off to the Station!
(A/N: I'd just like to say…thank you! Oh my gosh…the ideas that came in for this chapter…-grins evilly- hehehe…well I hope you like this chapter because it features a few…interesting guests….
Oookk…um…DON'T KILL ME! –watches the angry reviewers fearfully- I know it's VERY late…as in VERY VERY late….ok then now that that' s out of my system…hope you enjoy the show!
Disclaimer:
Nel: Yeah Kikeri Ki doesn't own Star Ocean 3…
Albel: Thank god...
Kikeri Ki: ….-glares and picks up keyboard-
Albel: What?
Nel: Albel…I suggest you run…now
Kikeri Ki: -presses random button on keyboard-
Albel: I'm a little girl! –Realizes that he's being controlled- oh crap
Nel: told ya
"Hello maggots of the world. I'm Albel Nox and the supreme ruler of this radio station which you know as Elicoorian Radio," Albel cackled, "Today we'll be starting off with…" he looked at the caller ID and groaned, "Blue Persuasion,"
"Hey, well me and a couple of other people have decided to take an 'educational' field trip down to your radio station…oh and where's Nel?"
"WHA…?" Albel said stunned
"Where's Nel? Jeez you're not too bright are you?" Blue shook her head at his stupidity
"No before that worm!"
"Oh…well some of my buddies and I decided to pay your establishment a visit…see you in a bit! And make sure the door is unlocked…or you'll face…consequences…" she hung up with a hint of evil laughter
"…oh no…" Albel muttered... but soon forgot about it "Next caller, randmneko."
"Albel how does it feel to know that you're not real?" randmneko asked
"What kind of idiotic maggot question is that?" Albel yelled
"Wow…kinda snippy today aren't we?"
"Bah…"
"You haven't answered my question,"
"…Fine…I was mad and confused"
"Why?"
"DAMN! Quit asking me questions!" Albel slammed down the phone. Suddenly there was a yell from below.
"ALBEL! You are supposed to be nice about this!" Fayt yelled, "And why the heck is this door locked?"
"And where is Nel?" Sophia added
Albel glared at them for a moment and then went back to answering questions, "ThrogmortenMimic, you're on the air,"
"Ok, if you hate Nel so much then why don't you just marry some other girl like oh I don't know –cough-Sophia-cough- wow sorry…bit of a cold" TM said
"…I don't love that worm Sophia…she's weak," Albel muttered
"Don't you just want to corrupt her innocence?"
"Bah that girl is not innocent as you might think…her and that quiet maggot Mirage have some attitude…." Albel said remembering
(A/N: This idea came from The Crazy Authoresses CAT and AMS…so there…I'm putting it here…)
Flashback: April 1st
"I don't think this is a good idea Mirage…" Sophia whispered as the two tip-toed (HAHA! Tip-toed…) down the hall to Albel's room.
"Don't worry…" Mirage answered, clutching her digital camera
"You are starting to sound more and more like Cliff everyday" Sophia rolled her eyes.
"Be quiet! Now do you have the rope?"
"Yes ma'am"
"Ok…let's go" swiftly Mirage and Sophia, tied Albel's hands and feet, and dressed him in Nel's outfit. He didn't even move (having passed out from a night of binge drinking of Ye Olde Cyder) and so they left him. They're next objective was to repeat their previous actions on Nel…not an easy task. But Mirage was on a 'hunch' and had a plan…
"Uh…what are you guys doing in my room?" Nel asked as Sophia flipped on the lights.
"Hey Nel, we were just wondering if you would like to try this drink that we invented," Mirage said smoothly
"Who made it?" Nel demanded
"Sophia of course! I can't cook to save my life," Mirage said sheepishly
"Ok then…Sophia can usually cook," with that Nel downed the drink. Another 5 seconds and she passed out.
"Can usually cook?" Sophia said insulted
"Shut up and help will you?" Mirage snapped
"Where did you get that drink anyway?"
"I took it from one of Roger's failed inventions pile…"
"…are you sure it's not poisonous then?"
"Of course not!"
"You have no idea what's going to happen do you?"
"Not a clue…I do know that it'll put you to sleep!"
"Thank you Captain Obvious," Sophia rolled her eyes as they left the room.
The Next Morning
"What in bloody hell?" Albel said groggily, as he tried to get out of bed and ended up falling on the floor
"Damn it!" Nel yelled from the other room as she too met the same fate. Both she and Albel managed to get up and hop into the hallway.
"Oh my god why in the hell are you in my clothes wretch?" Albel said stunned
"I could say the same for you…you look like more of a cross-dresser than usual," Nel laughed
"Smile!" rang out some voices. It was, of course Mirage and Sophia, coming to inspect their handiwork. Grinning they snapped some digital pictures of the two dumbfounded radio hosts.
"You've got five seconds to run maggots…I suggest you take that start," Albel said furiously as he managed to cut off his restraints
"Uh…" the two looked at Nel who also cut the ropes and was eyeing them in a cold way. She jerked her head upward as though agreeing with Albel.
"RUN!" Sophia screamed as they both tore out of the room. The two hosts nodded and took off after them…mismatched clothing and all.
Back to the Station
Now by this time ThrogmortenMimic was laughing so hard that they accidentally dropped the phone.
"Yeah laugh all you want you maggot," Albel muttered angrily
"Oh and by the way….i told her about the ENORMOUS crush you have on her, so have fun with that!" and they hung up
"WHAT?"
"Oh sweetie!" a sweet little voice rang out
"Oh crap," Albel muttered, resigning himself to his fate. The door was kicked open and a starry-eyed Sophia raced into the room, pulling Albel into a giant hug. And then came the questions
"Does this outfit make me look fat?"
"Do you love me? Really and truly?"
"Do stripes really make you look bigger than you are?"
"Why are you so insensitive?"
"Why is your face turning blue?"
"Am I fat?"
"WHY WON'T YOU ANSWER ME?" She finally screamed as Albel gasped for breath. Miffed she then proceeded to kick Albel in the shin and storm out the door.
"Women," he muttered, "thank God that's over, and our next caller is," he looked at the ID, "Neko Tamashi"
"When did you start wearing you're loin…I mean sarong?" they asked
"………" Albel sighed, "I was just a young lad at the time,"
"Lad? Cripes that's really weird!"
"Anything else?"
"Where'd you buy your outfit?"
"Airyglyph,"
"From what? Some transgender clothing merchant?"
"DAMN IT!" and Albel was about to slam down the phone when he was interrupted,
"Don't you dare Nox," came the quiet voice. Sure enough there was Nel, staring at the swordsman with a look of indifference. Albel was at a loss for words.
"How did…what….why…aduh?" Albel sputtered
"To answer your questions, one it IS possible to train a cat, two you just give a cat catnip and they'll do anything for you, three why? Because I live to see you get tormented and I wouldn't miss co-owning this show, and aduh? I don't have an answer for such a retarded question," Nel finished smugly
"….curses…." Albel muttered
"So what questions do you have left?" Nel asked
"Well I'm wondering what Albel thinks about the hundreds of Fayt/Albel pairings out there,"
"I don't like them…I'm not gay," Albel said
"You know I could respond very evilly to this remark but I don't think I will," Nel said with a smirk
"………"Albel glared at her
"So what do you think about them Nel?" Neko asked
"Well I know that Albel isn't gay (atleasthewon'tadmitit) but I think it's kinda funny…especially to see his reaction when he reads the things," Nel answered
"And my last question, Nel, have you ever considered growing your hair out longer?"
"No…it's easier to manage, and it doesn't get in my way when I'm kicking Albel's butt," Nel replied
"Ha, ha, ha, so funny today aren't we?" Albel said sarcastically as the conversation ended.
"By the way, when were those people coming?" Nel asked, changing the subject
"….crap…." Albel murmured, having forgot the danger that was coming towards him. He swiftly ran from the room and came back moments later with a smug look on his face, and swallowing a key.
"Doesn't that hurt?" Nel asked as she watched the piece of metal disappear,"
Albel choked and then winced, "maybe" he finally gasped
"…whatever," Nel rolled her eyes, "Deathblade Prime you're on the air,"
"Hello again. Well I've got some challenges for you guys." Deathblade said
"Alright!" Nel said buoyantly and snapping her fingers they landed in the arena once again.
"One of these days I'm going to find out how you do that…" Albel vowed
"Your first challenge, attend a heavy metal rock concert. Suddenly huge speakers, a stage, bright lights, and a band of guys with ripped up jeans and black shirts with random pictures of gore on them appeared in the stadium. Also came the sound of thousands of fans and the place was packed. After tuning up their instruments a bit, the band let loose with a raging torrent of sound
"Dang it…" Albel muttered as he was pulled into Mosh pit, and was tossed around like a seashell in a wave.
"Oh come on!" Nel screamed, "Enjoy this!" she too was now pulled into the Mosh pit.
About 30 minutes later everything was gone except Albel and Nel who were beaten and worn.
"Well that was a ton of fun!" Albel said sarcastically.
Nel glared at him, "anything else?"
"Yeah," suddenly two giant kegs of Ye Olde Cyder appeared, "a drinking contest. No stopping, spilling or regurgitation allowed. Last one standing wins," Deathblade chuckled
"All right!" Albel charged at one of the kegs, and started guzzling the alcohol. Within five minutes he passed out.
Nel shook her head, "moron," she calmly started sipping a mug.
Two hours later…
"Oww….my head," Albel groaned, the room fuzzy and spinning.
"Oh Albel I've got a special visitor for you!" Nel grinned
"I don't need company, I need aspirin," he moaned
"…you dolt aspirin hasn't even been invented yet!"
"Give that Louise lady some time she'll get it,"
"ALBEL!" another voice shrieked
"OW!" staring over him was a young girl. She had blond hair and in a way looked sorta like Albel… (A/N: heh…not my character…she belongs to Blue Persuasion…if she can keep control over her lol)
"A…A…A…Amanda!" Albel sputtered
The girl (whom we now know as Amanda) giggled, "That's right! I heard that my poor big brother was a sissy when it came to drinking…so I decided to drop out of summer school to take care of him!" Amanda gave him a giant hug
"Is that legal?" Nel wondered
"You're crushing me…." Albel gasped
"And I brought Cuddles!" Amanda held up the giant spider
"SPIDER AHHH!" Nel yelled and ran out the door
"Ah well…don't worry, well always have each other!" Amanda sighed, handcuffing him to the desk. Moments later he was chewing…trying to chew his own arm off in a desperate attempt to escape. Amanda was seemingly oblivious to this fact
"Won't this be fun? I can take care of you, tell you stories about myself, and you can introduce me back to that handsome rat thing!"
"Roger?"
"That's it!" she giggled again
"AMANDA! You have to get back to school this instant! Don't make me set the dogs on you!" a stern voice said
"Oh dang…the truant officer" Amanda muttered. Quick as lightning she and Cuddles jumped out the window and into freedom. "I'll be back soon brother dear!" she yelled at him
"Cripes," he murmured
"Hey uh…there's some people trying to get in at the front door…but it seems to be locked…any reason why?" Nel asked mockingly, standing at the door
"Just trying to keep out the rift-raft," he explained
"Really…well I'd be worried because they're trying to break down the door,"
"WHAT?" sure enough there was a loud chorus of thuds coming from the door, followed by a man's voice groaning.
"Um…didn't the package say a Laselle SHAPED battering ram?" a voice asked
"Maybe….but using Laselle in person is working much better don't you think?" another voice replied
"Dang it…I was sure I asked for them to leave the door unlocked,"
"Who answered the phone?"
"Albel, somehow he got rid of Nel,"
"Well there's the problem! Albel would never let us in!"
By this time Nel was laughing her head off, "um…close friends of yours?" she giggled
"More like fan girls," Albel muttered
"One, two HEAVE!" and the door finally came crashing down….leaving five girls in its wake.
"Well that was fun," one of them quipped
"It's Albel!" another one said excitedly
"All right! This is going to be fun!" yet another one said evilly
"Um, well may I ask who you are?" Nel asked amused
"Well, that's Aleu, CAT, lil, Epiclesis, and I'm Blue, I came up with the idea," the girl said pointing out the members of the posse
"Oookkk…so um…why are you here?" Nel asked another question as they fanned out and looked around the radio station
"Oh we just wanted to visit…" Aleu commented
"And get a first hand view of the questioning," lil grinned
"…grrreeeaatt…" Albel rolled his eyes
"Amaya came too, but the sign outside your door says no animals? Why is that?" Aleu asked
"Because Roger doesn't like to see competition," Albel snickered
"Well anyway….since you're all here…why don't we get started with these questions?" Nel said
"Well…I asked my questions a long time ago, so Aleu why don't you start." Blue said
"Ok! Number one did you like that kiss that I dared you to do?" Aleu said slyly
"……..maybe" Albel muttered
"It was alright," Nel shrugged
"Ok then…Nel how in the world do you fight in an outfit like that?"
"I don't, I have a stunt double" Nel replied easily
"O.o"
"Yep you learn something new everyday," CAT said shaking her head
"Besides when I do fight, I'm used to the clothes," Nel finished, grinning inwardly
"How about you Albel, has your skir…sarong…sorry, ever flown up during a battle?"
"No…I take care not to have that happen," Albel said a bit weirded out
"Do you even wear underwear under that?"
"……yeah I do, anymore stupid questions?" Albel replied menacingly
"Not for you, but Nel you forgot your copy of the 'Albel to English' dictionary, so here." Aleu threw the giant book at Nel
"Thanks! I was wondering what happened to that thing," Nel said
"My turn!" lil cried, "Albel did you ever have a boyfriend when you were growing up?"
"Uh…no" Albel sneered
"Really? I would have thought that since you look like a girl, all the boys would be after you!"
"He must have been really popular with the guys," Nel laughed
"God…." Albel groaned
"I wonder if a guy ever tried to pin him against a wall and kiss him…" lil pondered
"THAT'S DISGUSTING!" Albel finally snapped
"Moving on…Nel did you ever have a girlfriend? Because you look pretty much like a guy…."
"…..hey we're talking about Albel's relationship problems not mine, but no, no girl ever did….some guys though……I ended up decapitating them….." Nel said, thinking deeply
"O.o" Albel scooted away from the evil (ish) red head.
"Ha…that's great!" lil laughed
"OO! Me next!" Epiclesis grinned
"Crap…." Albel muttered again
"Albel…has your handwriting always sucked? Or did that just happen when you got your arm burned off? Because you only have a 4 for writing…." Epiclesis asked
"He was never the brightest child….." Nel began a flashback
"NO! No more memories like that please!" Albel begged
"And so the Wicked fell to his knees like a little baby," Blue narrated
"So what's your answer?" CAT asked impatiently
"Yeah we're waiting!" Aleu chimed in
"Fine…I don't have good writing skills…nor have I never had good writing skills…so get off my back!" Albel snapped
"Jeez…bite my head off why don't you?" Epiclesis said shocked
"I hate my life," he moaned
"Ok then Albel I know that you aren't good at baking cookies…but are you a horrible cook at everything or just that?"
"I suck at cooking…but that's a woman's job, not a guys." And in an instant he realized that he had said the wrong thing in a room full of ladies. Every girl's eyes narrowed at the comment
"GET HIM!" lil yelled and WWIII was about to erupt. Finally Nel sighed and patched up the whole matter…moving on with the questions
"Why did you grow your hair out Albel?" Epiclesis asked
"It's a Nox family tradition," Albel said proudly
"What to look like a girl?" Nel snickered
"Damn you!" Albel drew out his katana
"Not now! We have guests!" Nel hissed at him
"Fine…." Albel grumbled
"Since we all know that you wore pink ribbons in your hair…did you take ballet lessons too?"
"…….."
"Yeah he did," Nel said calmly
"Quit telling them stuff about me!" Albel yelled
"It was an interesting class that year….all the girls ganged up on the one guy in the class (Albel) and we put a ton of make up on him…not that he minded….." Nel grinned
"I really REALLY hate my life," Albel grimaced
"Well um…thanks for answering my questions Albel," Epiclesis said innocently
"What are you plotting?" Albel said warily
"Oh…nothing…." And with one swift movement she cut a piece of Albel hair off
"What the HELL?"
"Um…I need it….or me and Aleu need it actually….i know you won't mind!"
"And what if I do?"
"Nel it's your turn! Are you still leader of the Secret Legion? Or are you now a Crimson Blade?" Epiclesis ignored the affronted Albel
"…Still a member of the Secret Legion" Nel responded
"Ok…why don't you ever use symbology to attack Albel when he's annoying you?"
"Eh…to much trouble…he could attack me first before I got the spell out…not that he would remember,"
"Quit making fun of me!" Albel yelled. The girls giggled.
"Are you sure you just don't like Albel?" Epiclesis teased
Nel paled, "Um….i really don't know…."
"Surrrreee…." Epiclesis grinned, "Now my final question is for both of you. Why in the heck do you follow these dares?"
"Because we don't like to lose," Nel said
"Wouldn't it just be easier to forfeit them? I mean it's not like you're getting anything for doing them,"
"….."
"OOOOO! Albel likes Nel! And vise versa!" all the fan girls laughed
"……crap" both of the co-hosts sweat dropped
"And last but not least is me!" CAT proclaimed
"…and then you people leave?" Albel said hopefully
"For the time being," Blue said with an evil grin
"…dang it I bet they're going to come back…." Albel muttered
"My first question, do either of you know anything about a guy named Dias?" CAT asked
"Sounds familiar," Albel said
"Are you sure it's not Dion? That guy was annoying," Nel said in remembrance
"Nope it's Dias. Anyway I was just wondering because you both are sort of girly versions of him…."
"………cripes….." Nel muttered
"Well anyway, Albel, why did you try and kill Fayt that one night at the inn?"
"I wanted to ask the maggot a question but he wouldn't wake up," Albel explained
"Are you sure you weren't just crying out for attention from your wittle fwiends?"
"…." Albel's eye started twitching, "No…"
"I've got it!" Blue exclaimed, "He was afraid that Fayt would steal Nel away from him!" Everyone but Nel and Albel gasped. Nel because she was busy laughing her head off in a corner and Albel because he was sorely mad and creeped out.
"Another theory! Fayt is just an android programmed to say UP3 every few seconds!" CAT exclaimed
Suddenly Fayt rushed into the room, "Hey! UP3, I'm not, UP3, a robot! UP3, and I'm just trying, UP3, to follow the law! UP3UP3UP3UP3UP3UP3UP3UP3UP3" and Fayt then fell to the floor twitching and convulsing.
"Nice to see you Fayt," Nel said sarcastically and promptly pushed the blue haired earth boy down the stairs
"…..wow….." Aleu shook her head
"I'll say," lil murmured
"So what are your favorite candies?" CAT asked the duo
"Well I kinda like lemon drops…." Albel answered. Nel didn't say a word, having known better, and for good reason for CAT had an evil gleam in her eye
"Well I just happen to have some of those with me…but first you gotta tell me, what is your middle name?"
"I'm not going to tell you that worm!" Albel sneered
"Fine," she sighed, "you might as well have these candies then," she handed him the entire bag
"Thanks a lot," he mumbled, his face filled with candy. All of a sudden, he drooped, and his eyes stared blankly at nothing in particular as he started to drool.
"I knew I was smart not taking those things!" Nel exclaimed
"Now Albel, what is your middle name?" CAT said patiently
"Glou Oddeye Airyglyph Ponyboy Castello Romaria Marilyn" Albel finally managed to get the words out
"Whoa…." Blue said shocked
"HA! He has two girls' names for it!" CAT was on the floor laughing
"Ponyboy?" Aleu giggled
"Isn't Oddeye the dragon?" Epiclesis asked
"Sure is! He'll never live this down!" Nel laughed
"I've got it recorded!" lil held out the tape recorder
"And everyone will have heard it on the radio…" Nel said thinking about all the humiliating days Albel would have to live, "Well that's all the time we have for today; tune in next time for Elicoorian Radio!"
"Bye everyone!" the five yelled
"Pancakes…." Albel drooled
(A/N: Woo! I actually got the chapter written! Well thanks for all the reviews first of all. I'm sorry if I missed you in the 'field trip' but I do think I got everyone…I could be wrong though…but I hope you like this chapter….it's 10 pages long on my computer so…be thankful!)