Alex spent the next hour trying to explain to Izzie what home was. He talked about what it looked like and then all the things that they could do once they were there. She took a little convincing, change wasn't something she could deal with too well but eventually she came around. She started looking forward to going home. Which was a good thing because if she wasn't she would have been impossible to deal with. She stopped fighting the doctors who were trying to help her and actually cooperated with them. Her physio and other therapies intensified, they wanted to see how far they could push her before she cracked. She was doing well; everyone was pleased with the way she was going.

Alex was looking forward to Izzie going home too. He was excited about the change of scenery more than anything and his own bed of course. A little part of him also hoped that perhaps being surrounded by 'familiar' things might help some of the old Izzie return. He swore he'd seen a bit of her these last few days, once she was on board with the whole going home idea she'd seemed a little different but then again if you want something bad enough you start seeing things that aren't there. In reality he was just grasping at straws.

/\/\/\/\

"Don't go." Izzie grabbed hold of Alex's arm and refused to let go. "I want you to stay."

"I know." Alex sat down again and tried to work his arm out of her grasp. "But I have to leave. You're coming home tomorrow. I need to go and get everything ready for you."

"Stay."

"I have been staying but I can't stay any longer. We talked about this. I told you I couldn't stay today."

Alex released Izzie's grasp from his arm and stood up again. He stepped back from the bed so she couldn't reach him.

"Don't leave me." She called out to him as he started walking to the door.

"I'll be back by 6pm. Just try and get some rest." And then he walked out the door.

/\/\/\

Izzie watched the door close behind Alex and tried to shake the sense of loss she was feeling from her mind. He would be back she told herself, he always came back. And even though she knew this she couldn't help feeling terrified every time he left her.

/\/\/\/\

Alex closed the door to Izzie's room and walked away. It was the first time in weeks that he'd left during the day, it was the first time in weeks that he'd actually left. It was only 9am he literally had the whole day to himself. Well not totally to himself, there were a lot of things he needed to do but in an essence he was free. Izzie wasn't expecting him back until 6pm, he'd told her he couldn't be there even if she wanted him back she had to understand he couldn't be there.

/\/\/\/\

The never ending list of things Alex needed to do became a lot shorter when it actually came to doing them. Getting his apartment ready had been the major task. He'd thought it would have taken a long time to clean everything but the apartment turned out to be a lot cleaner than he'd remembered. He'd thought the fridge would have taken a while but he literally threw everything in it out. Shopping for new food took the longest. He wasn't sure what foods Izzie would want to eat, her likes and dislikes seemed to change daily so he brought a bit of everything he knew how to cook. He brought so much food that the fridge and the pantry were bursting at the seams. There was enough food there to last them two or three weeks. Once the shopping was done there wasn't anything else to do. He needed to get some clothes for Izzie to wear home but that was it and it was only noon.

Alex had six hours of free time. Six hours where he could do whatever he wanted. He could have gone anywhere but he found himself heading back to the hospital. He entered through the front doors and was about to catch the elevator to the fourth floor to see Izzie when he changed his mind. He didn't need to see Izzie just yet. Instead he went to the pit and began looking for a small case to take on.

/\/\/\/\

Alex wasn't meant to be working, technically he was still on leave but the idea of doing something, anything work related excited him. He slowly walked past all the pit patients looking for someone with something interesting that wouldn't take too long to fix. He was about to settle on a young man with a deep laceration to his arm when Dr. Montgomery came by.

"Dr. Karev, Alex." She called out to him. "What are you doing?"

"I arr…" Alex stammered, he wasn't sure what to say. He hadn't been expecting his mentor or anyone significant for that matter to see him. "…was just looking for something to do."

"Something to do?" Dr. Montgomery lifted her glasses and stared down at him. "Shouldn't you be up stairs with…"

"No. Yes." Should was an interesting word, he should be with Izzie but he didn't have to be with Izzie, not today, not yet. "She's being discharged tomorrow. I'm supposed to be getting everything ready for her to come home but I've finished and I told her I wouldn't be back until six."

"I'm sure she wouldn't mind you coming back early." Dr. Montgomery looked down at her watch, it was just approaching one o'clock.

"I'm sure she wouldn't but…" It felt weird saying it out loud, actually admitting it to someone else. "…I kind of don't want to go back yet."

"Oh." Dr. Montgomery nodded. Alex could feel her staring down at him and he felt the need to explain himself.

"She's being discharged tomorrow." He began. "Now is the first and probably the last time in while that I've been alone, able to do something without worrying about her. I just wanted to know what it felt like to be a doctor again."

"Oh." Dr. Montgomery placed her glasses back on her face. Alex could feel her staring down at him, judging him. He told himself not to take her crap if she gave it to him; he wasn't doing anything wrong, not really. "How about you come with me."

"What? Why?" That wasn't exactly the response Alex was expecting.

"I have a case you can help me with. It's a lot more interesting than anything you're going to find down here."

/\/\/\/\

Izzie lay in her bed. Her head was throbbing and she was exhausted. They'd worked her harder today than any other day and Alex hadn't been there to help her. She kept trying to tell herself that that was okay. He had to leave today but it was 6:30pm now and he still wasn't back.

She'd already called the nurse once to try and find out where he was. The nurse said she'd page him but he wasn't answering his pages. She fought the urge to breakdown and cry; she didn't want to be that person anymore. She'd been talking with a psychologist that afternoon he'd made her aware of some of her emotional short comings and given her some techniques to try cope. They'd been working to a point, she hadn't broken down yet but she was so tried. She started to let her guard down, she could feel everything she's been trying to keep in slowly start coming out. She let the fear and anxiety overcome her then the smell of burning rubber filled the room. She pressed the call button to alert the nurses right before everything went black.

/\/\/\/\

Alex felt on top of the world. Well not quite on top of the world but he was feeling better than he had in a long time. He'd been helping Dr. Montgomery out on a TTS case. He'd been back inside the OR and the experience had given him such a rush.

"You did a great job in there today Karev." Dr. Montgomery said to him as they both cleaned up in the scrub room.

"Thanks."

"Have you given any more thought to when you might come back?"

He hadn't thought about it at all. Until today the idea of actually going back to work had seemed an impossibility. He'd been so focused on taking care of Izzie, work hadn't even crossed his mind, well not in any significant way. But now that he was here, now that he was back in the OR he realized how much he missed it, how much he wanted to go back.

"Maybe soon. I don't know. I'd have to work something out with Izzie first."

"Of course." Dr. Montgomery shut off the tap and grabbed a towel to dry her hands. "When you are ready, I'll be waiting for you." She told him before she walked out the door.

/\/\/\/\

Alex left the scrub room a few minutes later. He was still running on an adrenalin high, he was actually looking forward to seeing Izzie. He was going to tell her what he'd been doing all day. She probably wouldn't understand any of what he said but maybe she would, maybe he could make something click.

He reached the locker rooms and started to get changed. He slipped his watch on and saw the time 7pm, "Shit" he thought, he was late. He changed as quickly as he could. He picked up his pager, there were four pages waiting for him, the last one had come through 30minutes ago was a 911.

Alex's heart skipped a beat. Had something happened to Izzie while he was gone, had something happened while he was enjoying himself, while he was happy? He felt his insides turn as he began running to the forth floor.

/\/\/\/\

The corridor Izzie's room was on was full of movement. Alex saw two nurses walk into Izzie's room and Dr. Shepard walk out. Alex slowed his run to a brisk walk. He met Shepard half way down the corridor. Shepard's face was blank.

"We need to talk." He said and indicated for Alex to follow him into an empty waiting room.