Presenting … Lucas Danes?
By GilmoreGirl1979 (the Reigning Quote Queen)
Provider of Quality FAN FICTION
R/R: yes please I love reviews; I wanna marry them (as previously stated, I have strange passions.)
friendly disclaimer: I REJECT ASP's REALITY AND SUBSTITUTE MY OWN! NO HARM NO SUE!
Featured Beta: Localizy, the Goddess of All Things Cool and Awesome
Dialogue borrowed from 2.17 - Dead Uncles and Vegetables / written by Daniel Palladino / directed by Jamie Babbit
And from lost and found
7777777777777777777777777777
Chapter 36:
All I Can Breathe Is Your Life
Michel was at the front desk as Lorelai walked over to get her purse so that she could leave for another shift at the diner.
"Ah, Lorelai, good, perhaps you could explain something to me."
"I don't have time for that, I'm out the door Michel."
"Very quickly," he said slowly and snidely. "Tell me about the nine rooms set aside here. There's no name anywhere that I can see and no credit card to hold them. Mistake?"
"No, it's for Luke," Lorelai said with mild impatience.
"For who?"
"Luke from Luke's Diner."
"Aw, yes the flannel clad boyfriend of yours, with the protruding ankles. Well, there are nine rooms held for Luke from Luke's Diner, Luke your boyfriend?"
"That's right," Lorelai confirmed with a smile.
"French fry convention?"
"No, it's personal."
"Milkshake symposium?"
"No Michel. It's something personal and I'm vouching for him."
Michel continued, "Soda pop seminar?
"Stop it!" Lorelai grumbled.
"Pickle party?" Michel persisted.
Lorelai finally raised her voice, almost violently protective of her sensitive beau, "He's got nine rooms, now stifle!" As she headed for the door she added, "And for your 411, his ankles are fine!"
Michel looked genuinely surprised and actually considered apologizing later, as Lorelai swept out in a fashion of a queen.
On the car ride to the diner, Lorelai knew she shouldn't have snapped at Michel, but he was being an ass and she needed an outlet. Even though she was in the diner a lot of the time these days, she hardly got to see Luke with him running errands or upstairs making phone calls, so she didn't have time to ask him when his family was coming to occupy the rooms. She really didn't know what he was going through since they hardly had time to talk. She knew how much losing his father must have affected Luke as he was still mourning the date to this day, but was losing an uncle just like losing his father all over again? Lorelai wasn't really that close with her aunts and uncles and cousins. She didn't even attend her second cousin's funeral, opting to go to Babette's late cat, Cinnamon's, wake instead.
As Lorelai entered the diner she saw the relief on Luke's face that he could turn things over to her. Lorelai tied on a cute waist apron she had bought for her diner appearances and starting pouring coffee. She could tell Luke had a lot on his mind still, arranging travel for relatives, and making sure Louie's remains arrived okay. She kissed him quickly before Luke disappeared upstairs for his phone calls and realized that his mind was already upstairs, as the affection didn't even seem to register on his face. Lorelai knew there wasn't much she could do about the distress and sadness that Luke felt but knew he was grateful that she was helping him by working in the diner. She had a few roll over vacation days to play with, so she used them to work behind her boyfriend's counter and give him the time to focus on arranging the funeral and his relative's arrival, especially since it was fun being a waitress in the diner. Part of Lorelai's enjoyment from working at the diner is that she became an instant star as she adopted "real live diner talk" that the customers greatly enjoyed. She was converting everything she could in to some catchy, whimsical metaphor and couldn't understand why Luke didn't use diner talk all the time.
Similarly, Rory also found working in the diner fun despite the sad circumstances. Rory wondered as she hurried over from the bus stop to help her mom that if she had gotten a job at the diner, maybe her mom and Luke would have gotten together sooner. Even though she felt bad for the missed years that could have been between Luke and her mom, she was happy that they were together now. She watched the couple through the window and smiled at how concerned Lorelai was about Luke and at how grateful Luke was that Lorelai was willing to work in his diner. As she started walking around the tables, refilling coffees and waters, Rory became increasingly concerned over Taylor mumbling to himself, as he was agonizing over the farmer's market outside. Lorelai, rather than being concerned, could only laugh at his plight, wishing that Luke wasn't so busy so that he could savor Taylor's suffering as well.
"Taylor's wigging," Rory informed her mother.
"I know. He's been sitting there like the final days of Dick Nixon for almost an hour. Keep an eye on him. Hey Kirk," Lorelai brightly greeted the town everyman as he enter the establishment. People were always coming and going in this place, no wonder Luke always seemed to be at the end of his rope.
"Hello. Where's Luke?"
"Oh, he's busy with some stuff so Rory and I are helping out. What can I get you?"
"I don't know. I want lunch, but I'm not sure what to get."
"I have a suggestion, how about a hamburger with some strawberry ice cream with chocolate sauce for dessert?"
Kirk contemplated and said, "Sounds good."
She promptly called back to Caesar, "Yo, burn one, then pass me a pink stick and throw some mud on it! God, I love this business." Lorelai, looked around, saw that everything was under control, so she grabbed a plate from the pass through and headed behind the curtain and upstairs with it.
Since Luke was taking care of Louie, Lorelai had been trying to take care of Luke hence the plate of food. She stared at the plate containing a turkey burger and wondered who could eat this stuff. With a wrinkled nose and a frown she called through the door, "Luke, it's me." She heard him come to the door and smiled, "Hey. I brought you a wimpy with a rose pinned on it."
"A what?" Luke's brow furrowed under his ball cap.
"Turkey burger with onions," she said with a smile, glad that at least he chuckled. Lorelai couldn't image arranging a funeral for one of her parents, luckily Emily was so persnickety and Richard was so attentive to those details that everything was probably already taken care of. Lorelai knew how tired Luke was, as this was his second day of non stop arranging, but when she entered the apartment, saw the tarps, and evidence of the expanding apartment, she realized that he was planning the funeral, while Tom was building over his head. "How's the money pit coming?
"Oh, just uh. . .that's it," he mumbled, gesturing in the direction of where a wall used to be leading to Jess' room.
Lorelai put the plate on the table and looked at Luke. "What's the matter?" she leveled.
"Nothing," Luke shrugged.
Lorelai stepped towards him, put her hand on his chest, giving him the big blue eyes, and asked again, "What's the matter?"
Luke knew he couldn't fool her and admitted, "None of them are coming – not a one."
"Who?"
"My relatives – the ones I booked all the rooms for – not one is coming to Louie's funeral."
Lorelai's jaw dropped, "You're kidding – why?" She was shocked even though she had been guilty of the offense in the past herself.
Luke dove into a classic rant, "I don't know, which lame-o excuse do you want to hear first? A bunch of them claimed they can't get out of work."
"It's not so lame-o."
Luke began to list off relatives Lorelai had never heard of before, still in his rant mode. "Randy and Barbara don't want to miss their brat kid's rugby semifinal."
"Rugby has semifinals?"
"My sister never even called back. My cousins Paul and Jim, who my dad helped put through college, said they were too exhausted from a fishing trip. Then there is my slightly disturbed cousin Franny who said she can't leave because her Petey's sick."
"Son?" Lorelai asked hopefully.
"Parrot."
"Petey the parrot?" Lorelai raised her eyebrows.
"I saw the stupid thing once on a visit, flapping its wings like crazy, banging around, squawking the only two words it knows over and over – Petey and gorgeous. Gorgeous, Petey, gorgeous, Petey!"
Lorelai laughed at Luke doing a parrot voice, "That's disturbing."
"My family's disturbing."
Lorelai could tell he was really disappointed and snaked her arms around him. "I'm so sorry."
Luke sighed heavily, "This is wrong, this is not how it's done. A family member dies you pay your respects – period."
Lorelai pulled back just a bit, "Look at it this way – if they don't wanna be there, you don't want them there."
"My dad wanted them to be here."
"I know. But hey, Louie lived in Stars Hollow most of his life, so a lot of people from here will be there, right?"
"Right."
"I know it's upsetting, but maybe it's better this way."
"Yeah, I guess. I really hate that bird."
Lorelai giggled as she nuzzled his neck and enjoyed the quiet close moment with Luke. "I'm really glad you haven't eaten the onions yet," she said, leaning up to kiss him.
However, Rory walked into the apartment at that moment and saw the sweet embrace. She hated to interrupt their tender moment, as she knew Luke must be in need of some comforting, but there was a situation developing down stairs. "Hey Mom?"
Lorelai looked back at Rory, not separating from Luke, "What's up, honey? You got a herd of bulls shopping for China?"
"What?" Luke asked.
Lorelai turned back to her fella, "Customers – Seriously, how long have you owned a diner?"
"Sorry. Jackson's outside, he wants to talk to you, he says it's important."
"About what?"
"I don't know," Rory shrugged. "He seems upset."
"Ah. All right." Lorelai turned back to Luke, "You okay? "
"Yeah, thanks," Luke kissed her.
"You might want to study up on that diner talk," she said, sad that she couldn't stay with him.
Lorelai put her coat on and went outside and found Jackson pacing. "Jackson? What's up?"
"Lorelai hi," he said shortly. The anger Jackson felt was evident to Lorelai as he continued yelled, "I'm a man of miniscule means and I was just wondering, since you have such a contributing hand in what is going to happen on my wedding day if you'd like to pitch in financially as well!"
"Huh?"
"What the hell are you thinking!"
"What?"
"Remember that sweet, simple, affordable little wedding Sookie and I agreed on with minimal disagreement – no disagreement, in fact – perhaps the first time in the history of wedding planning that a couple agreed one hundred percent on everything?"
"Yes," Lorelai said cautiously seeing clearly that he was getting worked up by the pitch of his voice going up.
"But that was before you came in with your elaborate ideas and your string quartettes and your snow white roses."
"Jackson what are you talking about? We settled all this…"
"It's changed, it's all changed! You, with your wedding magazines and 5, 6, 10 brides and groomsmen…"
"Woah, woah, woah! Jackson, the only recent change I made was to suggest that I make the bridesmaids dresses; only 2 one for me and one for Rory. Now if that's changed in 24 hours we're going to need a serious sit down with the bride."
"Only 2?" Jackson looked confused.
"Yeah, I promise. Your brother and your dad were going to be the best men, speaking of which, may I say now I would rather dance with your father than your brother, though Rory's never going to forgive me for your brother Bo, although I would prefer to have my dance card fill with Luke. No offense."
"None taken." Jackson then queried, "Are we handling the flowers?"
"Yeah, it's cheaper."
Jackson looked adorable and confused, "Then why is Sookie going on and on about this elaborate wedding?"
"I don't know, but I will get to the bottom of it and you will have your simple affordable wedding."
Jackson let out a breath, "Well, I love Sookie and I want her to have what she wants, but . . ."
"It's okay, I'll take care of this. Oh and if Bo scars my daughter in any way, you are so going to pay."
"Message received," Jackson said timidly.
777777777777777777777777777777
Lorelai couldn't find Sookie at the Inn, as she had left early to go shopping for something that didn't make much sense mumbled by Michel's French accent. Lorelai and Rory headed to the town meeting hoping to catch Sookie there and walked into the town meeting already in progress.
"Late again, are we?" Taylor observed in a snide tone.
"Yes, I hope I'm not pregnant!"
"What?" Taylor began to wonder if he had missed another story about Luke and Lorelai. Lorelai almost regretted the instant murmur of the townsfolk speculating if she actually was. Perhaps Lorelai shouldn't make comments like that now that Luke and her were really an item.
Still, she sidled up beside two empty seats by Luke and Jess, "Are these seats taken? "
"Don't drag me into this," Luke scoffed, already hearing the whispering behind him, feeling color in his cheeks. "You really have to work on your punctuality, Lorelai. I banged the meeting in a half an hour ago."
Lorelai gasped to take the attention off her, "Uh, dirty!"
Taylor rolled his eyes, "I'm going to take advantage of this unexpected pause in our proceedings to confer with Miss Patty about the next item on our agenda."
"What'd we miss?" Lorelai whispered to Luke.
"Harry's retiring."
"The twinkle light man?"
"What do we do for twinkle lights?" both girls asked, heartbroken.
"Go to any discount store?"
Lorelai narrowed her eyes, "What do I see in you?" She looked up and seeing that Patty and Taylor were still deliberating, continued, "I'm surprised you have time to be here."
Luke let out a heavy sigh, "I don't, but I haven't been able to get any of the war re-enactors on the phone and I have to confirm them for Louie's funeral."
The meeting went on with Taylor's grievance about the new farmers market. After a debate about sexy squash and the repetitive permit for cart kiosk's cart kiosk, Patty out of annoyance banged the gavel to close the meeting. "Another fun one!" Lorelai exclaimed.
First thing after the meeting, Patty and Babette were bombarding Lorelai with questions about her menstruating and lunar cycle. While Lorelai dodge the personal questions, she saw out of the corner of her eye how Luke approached the re-enactors and even from her distance, things didn't seem to be going well. Just as Lorelai was able to get Patty and Babbette off her back, Luke started stalking off to his apartment. She thought about going after him, but she wanted to talk to the re-enactors before they dispersed, "Hey Taylor, Guys wait."
Taylor turned, "Ah Lorelai, I hope you will be more scrupulous with your time for the next meeting. Perhaps leave that humor at home."
"Right sure I'll get right on it. What did you say to Luke?"
"Aw, he wanted us to do the gun salute for that bonehead Louie."
"You mean you aren't?" Lorelai said aghast.
"Of course not, we all hated him." Sy said.
Andrew observed, "Didn't we just do this with Luke?"
Kirk, looking confused, added, "Oh God, I think I have Déjà vu"
Taylor rolled his eyes at Kirk, "Oh please, Kirk, it's not a disease."
Lorelai was fighting for what her man wanted, "But Louie was a World War II veteran, he deserves a vet's funeral!"
Andrew nodded, "Now I know Luke said that."
Kirk clutched his stomach, "Does anyone have a chair where I can sit down, I feel dizzy."
Lorelai was mad and began shouting, "Shut up Kirk! I can't believe this! He was a citizen of Stars Hollow."
Taylor was now being condescending, "Lorelai, you didn't know him alright, he was rude, crude, vulgar, no one liked him."
"What about William?"
"Excuse me?"
"Luke's father? Did anyone like William Danes?"
The re-enactors looked taken aback, and Sy piped up, "Of course we liked William. I mean, he was a true friend."
Taylor added, "The complete opposite of his brother."
James reminisced, "William always had an extra musket, he lent his extra to me till I could buy my own."
Sy offered, "And gunpowder. He was always prepared."
Seeing she had softened some hard lined faces, Lorelai continued, "Well it you won't do it for Louie, or for Luke, why not at least do it for William, your friend."
Taylor made a huge, guilty sigh, "Alright… we'll be there."
Lorelai smiled, "Great!"
"Mom?" Rory came up behind her. "You ready?"
As the re-enactors broke up heading home, Lorelai looked to the diner. She wanted to tell Luke that her world famous persuasion had won out, but his apartment light was already out. She decided that maybe it would be better for it to just be a surprise at the funeral.
777777777777777777777777777777
The next day, Lorelai found Sookie looking through a catalog of centerpieces. "Look, look here. Aren't they beautiful?"
"Gorgeous. What are they for?"
"My wedding."
"Your wedding? What do you mean they're for your wedding?"
"Oh I was talking to your mother the other day…"
Lorelai's shoulders sank, "Oh no. I thought you were just going to keep it simple."
"It is simple."
Lorelai gestured to the page, "It lights up."
"Just flip a switch, simple. Oh and I was thinking about how unreliable a CD player would be, so I'm looking into a band."
"A band?"
"An orchestra."
"An orchestra?"
"A small orchestra," Sookie feigned.
"Another one of my mother's suggestions?"
"Well, yeah."
"Tell me how my mother got so involved in all of this."
"Oh, she just mentioned the other day a few ideas that she had about your wedding…" Lorelai sunk again, "Oh no."
"And it sounded so romantic like a fairy tale and that's what I wanted. I mean this is how Jackson and I are going to start out together, we might as well make it memorable."
"Honey, what's the point if he's not going to remember your anniversary in 5 years."
"Exactly, we make it memorable so he has to remember."
"But you'll still be paying for it at your fiftieth anniversary. Sookie, this isn't you and it isn't Jackson either."
"What do you mean?"
"We talked."
"You and Jackson talked?"
"He nearly came after me with his hoe saying that I'm the one that put all these ridiculous fancy ideas in your head. I'm sorry but I love you Sookie and I love him too and it just seemed like it was time for me to meddle."
"He was upset?"
"He was worried," Lorelai
"Why didn't he just talk to me?"
"Because he's Jackson, he wants you to be happy and to give you everything you want. So what it comes down to is – is this what you want?"
"Well, were supposed to keep this nice and simple. God, we had it all worked out didn't we," Sookie realized.
"So change it back."
"I will, if Jackson will still have me?"
"Of course he'll still have you. Now do you need help? Or…"
"No, I'm just going back to the way things were, I'll make a few calls, cancel a few things."
"Okay, I'll be in my office if you need help."
77777777777777777777777777777777
Lorelai had been catching up on some paperwork at the Inn, paper work she had been putting to the side to work at the diner in Luke's stead. She really couldn't focus, she kept thinking about the funeral tomorrow. Louie wasn't even her family member, but yet she was thinking about her own mortality. She was thinking about how she had led a full life, leaving behind somewhat okay parents, a bright wonderful daughter, and Luke. Lorelai would hate to suddenly die and not know how their story turned out, to be tragically taken away from him before…
Suddenly her cell phone rang, bringing her out of her morbid thoughts, "Hello...Luke! Slow down, slow down... Okay, I'll come right over."
A half hour later she was in a funeral home in Hartford. She entered a room and seeing Luke said, "There you are, this place is like a disturbing fun house. Baby, What – Oh!" She was stunned silent when she saw the gaunt funeral director.
"It won't close," Luke stated, taking a break from pacing.
"What?" Lorelai kept an eye on the director who looked like an extra from a horror film.
"The lid," Luke gestured to the casket.
Lorelai finally noticed, "Oh, hello. . . Louie."
"That's Louie."
"Nice tan," she said it being the only thoughtful thing to say. "So, now, you say the lid won't close?"
"Yes, the lid won't close."
"Did you buy the right size?"
"Of course I bought the right size."
"It's the model we recommend for those of medium height and weight."
"And he's of medium height and weight."
"So then why won't it close?"
"Because of the stuff."
Lorelai knew by the look in his eye, that Luke was ready to steam, but she asked, "What stuff?"
"His stuff. He left a list of stuff he wanted buried with him."
"It's not uncommon."
"It's a very long list. His fishing reel, bowling trophy, a flask, his antique dueling pistols, his copy of Sherman's Memoirs…"
"So is all the stuff in there now?"
"Yes, it is. I shoved it in the best I could but now it won't close which defeats the entire purpose of having a damn casket in the first place."
Lorelai tried to push the lid close, but it sprang back up, startling her as if Louie was rising from the dead. "Whoa!"
"The football signed by Johnny Unitas gives it that bounce."
"What if we moved the gas mask and the pith helmet down towards the feet?"
"That end already has every baseball card he ever bought, thousands of them."
"Oh, bungee cord!" after seeing the disapproving glance from the director, Lorelai scaled her enthusiasm back. "Okay, no bungee cord. Um, what if we got some people from the office here, you know, accounting or whatever, to sit on the lid and then we could latch it? Do you have anybody you could spring?" She stopped as she saw the narrowing of the eyes from the funeral director, which made him look even creepier. "I'm out of ideas."
"So am I. You know what, to hell with this. To hell with this!"
"Luke, the funeral is tomorrow."
"I can't deal with this anymore!" he said exasperated, clearly at the end of his rope.
Lorelai tried to soothe him, "Well, it has to be dealt with."
"No, it doesn't. It's not as if he deserves my help or my respect."
"The man was your uncle."
"He was a jerk!"
"Don't say that."
"No, no, Taylor and the guys were right. I was cutting Louie slack out of respect for my dad, but the man was rotten and mean and selfish all his life. For God's sake, he's even selfish in death. Other people would've loved to have had those baseball cards. I would've loved to have those baseball cards. He's got Lou Gehrig's rookie card, Joe DiMaggio, Willie Mays, tons of others – but no! My uncle, King Tut, has to take all of them to the afterlife with him! I'm done, I've had it. From now on, it's just the bare minimum and that's it. Dig a big hole and just dump the casket in unlatched. If stuff falls out, fine. Just pile on enough dirt and make sure nothing's showing!" He turned and walked out the door, leaving the funeral director and Lorelai gaping after him.
After a rant for the ages, to be revered my future generations, Lorelai regained her composure and turned to the funeral director, "I'm assuming that wouldn't be appropriate either?"
"No," Lerch confirmed.
"I didn't think so. We'll get back to you in a little while." She left not wanting to be alone with a dead body, or the creepy director a minute longer. She hurried out to the street, but Luke had disappeared on the streets of Hartford. Lorelai tried for twenty minutes to find him, when she saw the same coffee shop three times with no interest of getting a cup, she decided she should head back to Stars Hollow, hoping when Luke calmed down he would return home.
7777777777777777777777777777777777777777
Lorelai went to the diner, hoping that Luke had returned and relieved when she saw Luke come through the diner's door. "Luke, there you are. I was worried." Lorelai walked up and hugged him, not caring if locals saw her hug her boyfriend.
"Yeah, sorry, I should've called. Thanks for covering again. This'll be the last time, I promise."
"Oh whatever," Lorelai dismissed, "Where were you? I followed you out but you pulled a Houdini on me." Lorelai pulled Luke toward the curtain that lead to his apartment to keep away from eavesdropping locals.
"Well, at first, I just walked around a bunch, you know, just trying to clear my head. Saw a lot of Hartford – and what a cesspool."
"Well, you're not a city man."
"Then, I calmed down after awhile and I figured dumping Louie's body in an open grave with all his stuff probably would be a little cold."
"Just a tad."
"So I got a Yellow Pages and I found the Big and Tall Casket Shop in Hartford."
"You're kidding."
"Nope, I found a casket that would fit my hundred and sixty pound uncle and his hundred and forty pounds of stuff, got the lid to shut the first time we tried it, so the funeral's on as scheduled."
"Good."
"I still don't know why I'm doing all this."
"You're doing it for your dad."
"Yeah, I guess. Although he is dead so he'd never know if I was doing it any different."
"He knows. He's got the big Luke picture screen on twenty-four hours a day and he watches and smiles. And you're doing it 'cause you're you."
"Hey, I'm going to change real fast and you can retire from your diner career forever."
"Oh no, it's fun. I came up with some new diner phrases. Do you know what a Lucky Duck Cluck is?"
"Not offhand."
"It's foie gras with chicken and green shamrock frosting."
"Why would anyone ever order that?"
"If they're high," she said, happy that everything seemed to be getting back to normal, until Lorelai saw Emily heading toward the diner, "Ugh, good grief."
"What?"
"Bad vibe sandwich just came in, better retreat."
"I won't be long," he said with a quick kiss before heading up the stairs.
"Hi Mom," Lorelai said, putting on an apron in order to help Caesar with the latest crush of people.
Emily expected to find her daughter at the diner downing another obscenely large cup of coffee, but was appalled to find her daughter wearing an apron, actually working behind the counter, lowering her self to Luke's station, "Since when do you work here?"
"I'm just lending a hand, Mom. What's going on?"
"I called Sookie, to give her some more names for her wedding plans, and she claims to have changed her mind on all the things I had suggested."
Lorelai couldn't help her proud smile, "Well, maybe she did."
"No, she didn't. I know what's behind this. That is, who's behind this."
"Mom, it was getting to be too much for her and too much for her fiancé."
"I knew it."
"Mom, these are not wealthy people, do you understand that? They're saving for a home and maybe college funds."
"I don't see what was so wrong with my just helping Sookie plan her wedding."
"Mom, come on."
"What, come on?"
"You weren't planning Sookie's wedding."
"Well, then, whose wedding was I planning?"
"Mine."
"Don't be ridiculous."
"Mom, your vision for this wedding and all the over the top stuff and the gazillion dollar light up flowers and bunting and champagne fountain and the Haute Couture dress – who's wearing that wedding dress in your mind's eye, Mom? Is it Sookie or is it me?"
"I wasn't planning your wedding, Lorelai. And furthermore I wasn't planning Sookie's. I was merely suggesting."
"Right," scoffed Lorelai
"I know that in a million years, you would never let me plan your wedding. I gave up on that dream a long time ago. Yours was going to be a Russian winter theme – the Romanovs."
"Before the firing squad, I assume?"
"Snow white roses, trees with white lights and candles, snow everywhere, you arriving in a silver sleigh with white horses."
"Wow."
"You hate the idea."
"No, no, I just – ."
"You just hate it."
"No, it just doesn't seem like me," Lorelai had to chuckle at the lavish wedding in Emily's mind, though being married in the snow seemed like a good idea.
"Yes, well, it would've been beautiful."
"I'm sure it would've been."
"Anyhow, it's obvious that wouldn't even be appropriate anymore being as I'm probably standing in your reception hall."
"Excuse me?"
"Burgers and fries for the dinner? The bride walks down the aisle with a ketchup dispenser in her hand."
Luke's eyes went wide and he stopped on the stairs. He had distinctly heard the word bride, leaned closer to the wall to hear better, and through the wall heard Lorelai exclaim, "What?"
"I'm talking about Luke."
"What about Luke?"
"Well, it's obvious, Lorelai. You're with him constantly."
"He feeds me."
"You bring up his name constantly."
"Once again, he feeds me."
"The moment he calls, you run to his side."
"He's my boyfriend, he needed me, I had to be there."
"Yes, I know you did."
"So what Mom? So what if we are together? It's our relationship and none of your business!"
"He is with my daughter, he has some influence over my granddaughter, that makes it my business. Should I set a date aside?"
"Mom," Lorelai droned annoyed.
"Why would you want to attach yourself to such a grungy, ignorant," Emily groped for the appropriate word, "…philistine."
Lorelai shot back, "Better to be attached to a philistine than a sybarite."
"What?"
"Aw, look it up," Lorelai grumbled as she wiped down the counter again. She imagined Luke would have done the same thing if he had gotten flustered talking in circles with Emily Gilmore.
At that Luke realized what they were talking about, in the diner for all to overhear. Whether she knew it or not, Emily Gilmore was going to ruin everything.
"I want an answer Lorelai…"
"MOM, we are not engaged! There is no date! The only foreseeable wedding in Stars Hollow is Sookie and Jackson's. Luke and I like spending time together, and the kissing and stuff ain't bad either. That's all I have to say for the moment. Now can I get you a cup of Joe or would you like to leave?"
Luke had heard enough, he didn't want Emily to talk Lorelai completely out of the idea before he ever had a chance to broach the subject with her himself, so he came out of the curtained stairwell, "Um, Hi."
"Hello," Emily said primly. "I have to go. I'll see you for dinner tomorrow night, Lorelai. Luke, I'm sure I'll see you again soon." She was about to leave, when Emily turned back to ask Luke, "What do you think of the Romanovs?"
Luke was confused, they had been talking about weddings if he wasn't mistaken, and Emily was segueing to Russian History. "They probably had it coming."
"A match made in heaven," she rolled her eyes.
Luke was confused as to what exactly he had confirmed or denied for Emily. Lorelai only smiled, a little embarrassed herself, hoping he didn't know what the reference meant to Emily.
Suddenly, Richard entered the diner for a fishing appointment he had with Luke. Emily was surprised to see Richard there, in such a ridiculous outfit and the look on her face showed it. Richard didn't even look at her, but addressed Luke, "Luke, are you ready to go?"
"Richard, why on earth are you dressed like that?" Emily said, distaste evident in her voice.
"Emily? What are you doing here?" Richard lowered his sunglasses.
"Well, you've spent so much time in Stars Hollow, I thought I'd try to find its appeal," Emily glared at Lorelai. "What are you doing here?"
Luke ignored the upcoming commotion with Emily and addressed Richard, "I'm sorry Richard. I forgot to call to cancel, and something came up."
"Cancel what?" Emily demanded.
Richard informed his wife, "We were going to go fishing Emily. I told you this morning…"
"I thought you were kidding… and you never said it was with Luke…"
"Didn't I?" Richard tried to recall the morning conversation he had with his wife.
"It's only common courtesy to call and cancel an appointment," Emily scolded Luke.
"Mom, please cut him some slack, he's had a lot to deal with," Lorelai defended. "His uncle just died and he had to arrange the funeral by himself."
"Aw well, Luke," Richard immediately softened for his new friend and sympathized with his loss. "I'm so sorry to hear that. Under the circumstances, we can reschedule for another time."
Emily was flabbergasted, her husband, being so forgiving, rescheduling a fishing trip, with her daughter's blue-collar boyfriend. Richard further be muddled her with his next statement, "I hope this doesn't change our plans for Saturday."
"I appreciated that Richard. Saturday will be fine, things should have settled down by the weekend."
"Well, then I'll meet you at the driving range. I am so sorry Luke, if I had more appropriate attire," Richard said, gesturing at his clothes.
"Thank you, Richard," Luke said, with Lorelai grinning at her father, happy that at least one of her parents cared enough about the situation to be 'proper'.
"Emily, I'll see you back at the house," Richard nodded respectfully.
Emily narrowed her eyes at Lorelai and said coldly, "Are you going to the funeral?"
"Of course I am."
"I see, you skip your cousin's funeral, but are willing to…"
"Mom, please don't finish that sentence," Lorelai warned.
In a huff, Emily left and Lorelai turned to Luke, "You were going to go fishing with my dad?"
Luke truly felt bad, "Yeah, it completely slipped my mind. I was so blindsided with all the funeral arrangements…"
"Hey it's okay, he didn't seem mad."
"It is okay that I go with him right? I mean he said he was interested in learning…"
"Yeah, it's fine. He looked kind of cute in that outfit."
77777777777777777777777777
Lorelai felt horrible at the cemetery with morbid with thoughts of her own mortality entering flittering around her brain. She kept thinking of about mausoleums and with whom she would be interred with for all time. She was getting frustrated at herself because that wasn't her thoughts weren't what this service was about, it was supposed to be about Louie Danes.. She stood next to Luke, angry at the lack of attendees. She. She had hoped at least someone else would show, but not even Rory attended, as she opted to work in the diner. In the end it was only Luke, her, and the reverend. That's it. No one else from Stars Hollow showed up to bid Louie Danes a fond ado, or even a bitter ado, since he seemed to have been so hated around town. She was angry that Jess hadn't bothered to show up as well, stating that he was doing something for Luke. This man was his family too and the only reason he had helped at all during the week was because Rory pestered him too.
Lorelai couldn't take her eyes off the casket as Louie was interred, to lay rest next to his brother William. Suddenly there was drumming in the distance and a smile broke out on her face. The Re-Enactors had come to give their salute to Louie with their muskets.
Luke seemed pleased but stunned, "That's all of them." Luke looked at Lorelai, knowing what hand she must have played in convincing the re-enactors to come, and she wore a guilty, proud smile. "Thanks."
"It's what your dad wanted," she said as she slipped her hand into his.
"Yeah. Oh, Louie would've hated this."
"That's just a fringe benefit."
7777777777777777777777777777777777777777777
Lorelai and Luke were walking hand in hand heading toward the diner, "Are you okay?"
Luke didn't know what he felt anymore. He was sad that someone had died, particularly a family member, but he was relieved it was over. "Yeah, I'm just not big on funerals in general."
"Nobody is," Lorelai chuckled. "It was a nice service. Nice and, um, intimate."
"I guess everybody deserves something at the end. Thanks for coming with me."
"I wouldn't have missed it," Lorelai eyed him again, looking for a stray tear, anything. "You sure you're okay?" she asked again.
"Yeah, yeah, better now that it's over. I just kept thinking back to my dad's funeral…"
"Oh Luke…"
"I'm fine really…" Luke seemed to notice commotion at the diner, "What's all this?
"I have no idea."
"What's going on?" Luke asked Rory.
"It's kind of like a wake."
"A wake?" Luke's brow furrowed.
"For Louie?"
"It's going well, anyway. People brought a ton of food if you're hungry.
"This is unexpected," Luke observed, he had been surprised the re-enactors showed, but even more that half the town was packed in his diner. "Don't you have wakes for people you like?"
"I think it might be for you."
"Am I dead?" Luke had to check.
"Face it, Luke, people like you."
"Shut up."
"And with charm like that, how can they resist?" Lorelai teased.
All townies were eager to eat drink and remember Louie Danes.
"I'm sorry I never met him," Lorelai said as she slipped her arm into Luke's.
"He was colorful," Luke smiled at her putting his hand over hers.
777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777
Lorelai and Rory had stayed to help clean up, while Jess had mysteriously disappeared telling Rory that he set it up, therefore they had to clean up, it was only fair. Rory was waiting outside while Lorelai was saying good night to Luke with a long kiss at the diner door, but Luke wouldn't release her. "Lorelai…" he whispered.
"Yes, Luke?" she matched his whisper.
There was a plea in his eyes, "Don't go…"
"Luke?"
"You know Jess went out a while ago and well, who knows when he'll be back…" Lorelai laughed, "Yeah, who knows." "But they are done my new room," he said, holding her hands and slightly tugging her towards the stairs.
"Your new room?"
"Yeah a room. With four solid, sound proofed walls"
Lorelai was very tempted and looked longingly towards the stairs and the apartment at the top of them. "Luke…"
"Please Lorelai. I don't want to be without you, not tonight."
Lorelai smiled and nodded her head. After all he had done for her over the years, this may have been the one time he seemed to really need her. "Let me just tell Rory I'll be home later…"
"Yeah… like morning."
Lorelai giggled shyly, but felt she had to be with him since he needed her and went to go tell Rory the plans for the evening before heading up the stairs to Luke's new room.
7777777777777777777777777777777777777777
"I have to say," Lorelai had a plastered smile on her face, "I'm a big fan of the walls…"
"Me too," Luke let out a small grunt as he adjusted with Lorelai in his arms.
"Also a fan of the new double bed," Lorelai bounced in place for a bit for the effect, then took to kissing his chest. "I am a really big fan of our celebration of life…"
"Hmmm, is that what this is?"
"I think so." Then, Lorelai posed the question from Luke's chest, "Hey, do you think he's in heaven?"
"Who?"
"Uncle Louie?" Lorelai's had was grazing his abdomen.
"Lorelai, do you really want to talk about this now?"
"Come on, I'm trying to be philosophical here!"
Luke considered the question, "I hope so, just so my dad can kick his butt around the place."
"Can you kick when you're in heaven?" Lorelai had to admire a very relaxed Luke.
"It's probably frowned upon."
"Yeah, plus you're all see-through and gauzy and your dad's foot could go right through him."
"This is a silly conversation…" Luke was playing with her hair again, but he considered, "And to think in 25-30 years that could be me."
Lorelai propped up on her elbow, "What are you talking about?"
"What? I'm trying to be philosophical," he shrugged. "You know what Taylor said about me being like Louie, a loner, never being married and stuff. I mean, I am getting crankier as I get older, he's not so far off.
"You are not your uncle," Lorelai scoffed. "I mean, would Louie ever build someone a chuppah, or help fix things around someone's house without being asked, or make a special coffee cake with balloons for a girl's sixteenth birthday?"
"Rory told you about that?"
"Yes. Would Louie have taken in his sister's kid without hesitating and without asking for anything in return?"
"No one would've trusted Louie with their kid. He probably would've forgotten to feed him or something."
Lorelai put her hand on his cheek and forced Luke to look at her, "You get my point?"
"Yeah, I get it," he gave her another squeeze
Lorelai whispered quietly, seemingly shy, "Besides, in 30 years you are going to be with me."
"What?"
"You'll be buried with me… for all time. Hey, do you think the mortician would put us in our favorite sexual position?"
"Lorelai, you are being morbid," Luke said, still processing her comment, wondering if her thinking was in line with his.
"You're right, Rory wouldn't like being next to that for all eternity."
Luke eyed Lorelai, pulled her close, and started kissing her, so that in one motion, Luke was on top of Lorelai and took each of her hands into each of his.
"And what, pray tell, are you doing?" Lorelai mumbled against his mouth, loving his naked form pressing against her again.
"Celebration of life," Luke said, nibbling at her neck, causing any protest Lorelai might have given to fade away into the bliss that was Luke.
7777777777777777777777777777777777777777
Jess came in the apartment and looked jealously at Luke's newly completed walls closing off what had been his bedroom alcove.
Jess looked to his left at where his own bedroom walls had yet to be completed and frowned. He went into the kitchen grabbed himself a soda and was hoping to settle in the living room and watch a little TV before heading over to his box and tarp littered half of the apartment. As he moved towards the TV he saw on the coffee table a familiar handbag. Jess' head shot toward the newly constructed walls and closed door and seemed to realize what was happening beyond the walls. Jess was a little unnerved, but had to agree with Rory, Luke and Lorelai were kind of cute together, once you got used to them. Under circumstances, with a funeral, and Luke being of that mid life crisis age Jess could understand why he'd want comfort and company from his girlfriend. Stranger things had happened and Jess only wondered if Luke would be stupid enough to propose during their quality time together.
However, what would that mean for him and his future in Stars Hollow?
77777777777777777777777777777
Once free from Lorelai's embrace, Luke made sure the coast was clear so that Lorelai would be able to enjoy her breakfast at the kitchen table wearing one of Luke's flannel shirts. She was happy that she was able to provide comfort for Luke and relished the feeling of the flannel on her skin, remembering that the first flannel she wore was tucked away safely in her closet, never to be reclaimed by Luke.
Luke was in a better mood that he had been for days, which Lorelai noticed when he willingly offered her coffee. "Coffee for the lady?"
"Thank you, good sir," she smiled. Since they had such a lovely evening Lorelai hated to pick Luke's brain during such a sensitive time, but this was the opportune moment as Jess wasn't around. She started playing with her coffee mug on the kitchen table, while Luke was making her breakfast, so she asked, "Hey Luke, um, does Jess ever talk to you about Rory?"
"What do you mean?"
"Oh, I don't know," she mused casually, "They just...well they seem to be thrown together quite a lot lately and I was just trying to figure out if that's a coincidence or …"
"Or if there's something going on," Luke finished.
"Yeah," Lorelai winced.
It sounded strange to Luke so he asked again to clarify, "Something between Jess and Rory?"
"Well yeah?"
"Well, getting to Jess confide in me is like pulling teeth, but well, doesn't that seem a little …"
"A little…?"
"Well yeah, you know," Luke started to shovel some scrambled eggs on to her plate. "I mean, Rory's a great kid, and in other circumstances, sure, she'd be really good for Jess."
"She would?"
"Well, yeah, but as it is, I mean, we're involved and them pairing off too would be a little…"
"Incestuous?" Lorelai finished with a raised brow.
"Well I was going to say weird, but that works too. You really think there might be something going on?"
"I don't know," she dismissed, "it's just I've seen things or heard things that don't add up."
"Well, what things?"
Lorelai really didn't want to bring up the tally sheet she had in her mind, especially since Luke had enough trouble after Louie's funeral. "Nothing, never mind, forget I said anything…"
The couple finished eating breakfast, talking about nothing important until eventually Lorelai had to leave to spend time with Rory. Luke was disappointed when Lorelai left, he still had her voice whispering in his head, Make a change, Luke. Change is good, Luke. Look at how happy we are Luke. Why aren't you open to a commitment Luke?
77777777777777777
Saturday
Richard canceled their tee time, figuring Luke, after his stressful week, should have pick of their male bonding activity. Luke to take him to a secluded lake where Richard could practice his cast and reel technique and make up for the fishing lesson he missed because of the funeral.
"I'm sorry again about your uncle, son. If I had had more appropriate attire I would have liked to have gone to the service."
"Richard it's alright. It was short notice and you had no obligation to attend. I am glad we rescheduled this lesson though."
"You know Luke there is a certain matter I've wanted to discuss with you for some time," Richard said, using his 'I mean business' voice.
"Really," Luke chuckled, "Actually sir… there's a certain matter I've wanted to discuss with you…"
777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777
"That was all God given talent..." why thank you NON POD Luke!
7777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777
R/R: PLEASE, I like to better myself. To quote The Princess Bride,
"...Remember this is for posterity, ... so be honest."
Please be specific with R/R; name one (or as many as you can think of or want to mention..…) At least one specific thing you liked
Please! It makes me feel good...inside (Dirty!)
Hence the Rant option below.
Insert Rant here V
A/N: if not completely satisfied with this chapter, please return unused portion for a full refund...