Presenting … Lucas Danes?
By GilmoreGirl1979 (the Reigning Quote Queen)
Provider of Quality FAN FICTION
R/R: yes please I love reviews, I wanna marry them (as previously stated, I have strange passions.)
Friendly disclaimer: I REJECT ASP's/DR's REALITIES AND SUBSTITUTE MY OWN! NO HARM NO SUE!
Dialogue borrowed from:
2.21 - Lorelai's Graduation Day
written by Daniel Palladino
directed by Jamie Babbit
&
2.22 - I Can't Get Started
written by Amy Sherman-Palladino and John Stephens
directed by Amy Sherman-Palladino
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Chapter 44:
I'd Like To Know If You'd Be Open…
It was possible that Lorelai hadn't heard that he was back in town, but in a small community like Stars Hollow, Rory highly doubted it. Rory wanted to ask if Luke would still come to her mother's graduation. There had been a plan in place for Luke to escort Lorelai at both her graduation and at the Sookie's wedding. It was a good bet that if the first was out, the latter wasn't a possibility either.
Lorelai was clearly scared to talk to Luke. She had excuses galore; she had to help Sookie with the wedding, she had to finish making the bridesmaids dresses, she had to study for business school finals, tourists were constantly badgering her for directions to the hot spots of Stars Hollow and Lorelai had to not laugh in their faces.
Then worst of all, Christopher had shown up…again! Lorelai and Rory were at Doose's market picking up some general items for their daily survival, Rory turned a corner and saw a familiar male figure. She thought she was hallucinating again, "Dad?"
"Hey kiddo, how's the arm?" Chris hugged Rory in the cereal aisle, Rory kept her arms limp at her sides. She thought after he left from the Movie-in-the-Square it was the last she'd see of him for awhile.
"Chris?" Lorelai said with a smile, "What are you doing here?"
"Hey, Lor," to Rory's dismay Chris hugged Lorelai too "Hope you don't mind if I just dropped in. Someone told me that visiting more would be a good idea and I wanted to see how that arm was healing. Thought we all could hang out like a family or something."
Lorelai was surprised at the seething resentment on Rory's face as she quickly separated from her father's hold, "Rory, aren't you glad to see your dad?"
"Aw yeah," Rory said with a tight expression, "How long are you staying?"
Seeing Rory was cutting to the chase, Chris shifted uncomfortably, "Well, I had some business in Hartford, thought it would be rude to pass through and not say hello to my girls."
Being referred to as his girls sent daggers shooting out of Rory's eyes.
"Well, I have to study a bit, finals are coming up, but um…" Lorelai tried to cut the tension between father and daughter, "Hey Chris if you are staying overnight why don't you start looking at the video store for some movies, sort of a family slumber party…we'll check out and meet you there."
"Sounds great," Christopher knew Lorelai would smooth things over with Rory for him.
Lorelai turned to Rory, "Okay, Miss Animosity, this has got to stop."
"Why? I don't want him here."
As always Lorelai's tone softened when she talked about Christopher, "Rory, he's your dad. He's here because he cares. You got hurt and he obviously just wants to be there for you in your hour of need?"
"What about the million hours before that!!" Rory knew that's not all her father had his designs on.
"So you are just never going to forgive him for whatever secret reason you are mad at him for?" Lorelai crossed her arms, "Okay, if we are going to start hating him again I need to know why?" Lorelai challenged.
"What?"
"Well, if what he's done is so terrible, I think I have a right to know if I've invited a villain to my house. Are we to be murdered in our beds?"
That wasn't the bed activity Rory was worried about. Rory wanted to say the reason, share her suspicions… but her mother was in a precarious place. Luke and her still had to talk and here was Christopher again swooping in to steal that opportunity away. Rory thought it was best to keep it to herself, to prevent her fears from becoming reality. She didn't want her mother to just leap for Christopher when Luke was a simple walk to the diner away. "I…I can't tell you."
"Okay, then. Then I don't have a reason to hate him; so I'm going to watch movies with my friend, your father while he is in town. Are you going to be a big girl and watch with us or pout in your room all night?"
Rory feared Chris might try to make a move if she left them alone for too long, "I'll watch."
"Good girl."
Rory crossed her arms and grumbled to herself, why couldn't it have been Luke we ran into at the store!
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Since it was still a school night Rory had to go to bed at a reasonable time. She hesitantly left her folks alone while she got ready for bed and while they made the couch comfortable for Chris over night.
Lorelai shooed Rory off to bed, "He's not going to bite me, I'll be fine."
Again, that wasn't what Rory was worried about.
"I really appreciate this Lor."
"Aw saves you a night in a crappy motel. Had you called ahead sooner I could have gotten you a room at the Inn."
"Nah, this is better, I get to spend more time with Rory."
"Well still, next time, call first…" Lorelai scolded in jest.
Chris smiled at the thought, next time.
"…I can get you an appointment with Maury."
"Whose Maury?"
"The Inn's Masseuse who looks like Antonio Banderas.
"Well, don't do me any favors;" Chris said sarcastically, "Do you have anything in an Angelina Jolie?"
"What would sherry think of that?"
Chris chuckled, damn, she remembered, "Well I don't think she'd like me running around with a second rate Antonio Banderas either. Speaking of significant others, where's Luke?" he asked casually.
Chris noticed he disarmed Lorelai a little, "Aw he's on a fishing trip." Lorelai knew he was back in town and he still hadn't tried to call her, Chris wouldn't know it was a lie it just had to last the few hours he was over night. He would go back to Boston, back to Sherry and everything would be fine.
"So everything's okay? Even after the car accident?"
"Yeah, we're fine," Lorelai wore the façade she saved for the public. Lorelai knew if Luke had been there he would have seen through the disguise, however she wasn't with Luke, she was with Chris.
"Huh? Well it's just you haven't mentioned him?"
"Well you haven't mentioned Sherry? How is she…and dear little Scampers?
"Actually we don't have Scampers anymore?"
That got Rory's attention, since she eavesdropped from her bedroom door.
Lorelai was curious, "Why?"
"He ruined an area rug because he refused to toilet train, so Sherry took him the pound."
"Aww, poor Scampers, he's declawed, how is he going to defend himself."
"Well she did it when I was on a trip anyway, so we didn't really discuss it." Maybe if Chris was with Lorelai, they could find scampers and adopt him again, but Chris was getting ahead of himself. She still had a boyfriend.
"Are you sure you don't want to head back tonight? I mean she might have rearranged all the furniture by now."
"Nah, its fine. As long as she's happy." Chris saw the sympathetic frown Lorelai wore, "Hey let's not talk about it anymore. I mean … let's just hang out."
"Well, I have work in the morning," she was supposed to have used tonight to study for her finals, but still it felt good to just relax and put off her troubles for one more day, "Let's finish making this couch into a bed."
After Chris put the pillow in the guest pillow case, he eyed some of Lorelai's CDs, "Frank Sinatra? Excellent choice."
Lorelai reacted to the artist, she had been listening to the CD, remembering the good times with Luke. Hoping when he came back to town he would have called or wanted to talk to her, Lorelai wanted to wait till he was ready because he is the one who obviously needed time, he's the one who left town at the first sign of trouble. Besides that she was scared of the conversation.
"Chris it's late," Lorelai tried to grab the CD case
"Come on, one song," Chris went to the CD player, put the disc in and pressed play.
Lorelai started to chuckle as he danced around like an idiot just to make her laugh again. Luke would never do that; shake his booty for Lorelai's amusement. Then Chris started to sing along like a genuine crooner, hamming it up for Lorelai.
"I've got you under my skin. I've got you deep in the heart of me. So deep in my heart, that you're really a part of me. I've got you under my skin." Chris glided over to Lorelai on the hardwood floor, and started dancing her around with him while she giggled to herself, "I've tried so not to give in. I've said to myself this affair never going to swing so well. So why should I try to resist, when baby will I know damn well," Chris dipped Lorelai, "That I've got you under my skin."
That was the last straw for Rory. She had to do something and looked franticly around her room for her phone. She had to call Luke. She had to tell him to get his butt over here and break up this little reunion. Suddenly Rory heard an engine start; she rushed to her window just in time to see a green truck pull away. Luke had come! But why didn't he come in?
The music filtered in from the other room again, "….But each time I do, just the thought of you, makes me stop before I begin, 'Cause I've got you under my skin."
Rory watched the taillights fade down the street, "Oh no."
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Over a quick pop tart and coffee Chris said goodbye to the girls, "Thanks for the shelter. In return, some coffee for the lady!"
"Thanks" Lorelai forced a smile, coffee made her think of Luke, but she had to get over her fear of the brew sometime otherwise she wouldn't be able to function. Still somehow, even innocently dancing in the living room with Chris to Frank Sinatra made Lorelai feel like she was cheating on Luke. Frank was their crooner, he had symbolism and meaning for Luke and Lorelai. Lorelai took a sip of the brew, it wasn't strong enough, it didn't taste as good as coffee from the diner.
"Well, I'm only sorry I can't make it to your big graduation day…"
Chris brought Lorelai out of her pining, "Oh its fine, you didn't know…" Lorelai waved off. Lorelai knew she couldn't very well throw out the coffee in her mug. That would incite questions from Chris and Rory on why she had accepted it in the first place if she wasn't going to drink it. Lorelai not wanting to drink coffee was like little kid not liking chocolate.
Lorelai forced herself to drink the coffee while Chris tried to say goodbye to Rory, "Well kiddo I'm heading out."
Rory glared at Christopher.
"I'll walk you out," Lorelai covered giving Rory a look. Out on the porch Lorelai smiled at Chris, "Hey Chris."
"Yeah?"
"Seriously, what's with you two?"
"Nothing, she's just…"
"Chris I have to know. I really don't want to have to pick sides but I don't even know what's going on?"
"She didn't tell you," of course she didn't. If Rory had, Lorelai would have either slapped Chris or been all for the idea.
"No, will you tell me?" Lorelai just wanted answers.
"Look, it will work itself out. Trust me," Chris stepped up the porch to kiss Lorelai's cheek, "I'll be seeing you."
Lorelai laughed, "In all the old familiar places. Thanks to you I lost and important night of studying!!"
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"I hate these books, hate them!" Lorelai cried.
"Now now. you're in the homes stretch," Rory soothed as she got herself a soda from the fridge.
"Ugh, Rory, my brain is full. It has reached capacity. I simply cannot ingest anymore information."
"So take a break."
"I can't… if I stop I'll just think about…" Lorelai trailed off.
Rory looked at her mother with sympathy, she knew Lorelai was thinking about Luke, keeping busy with grandpa, avoiding the diner, not drinking coffee to purge Luke from her brain; "Well, close your eyes, clear your head."
"No, because clearing my head just means that all the knowledge I have painstakingly stuffed in there will leak out. In order to make room for stuff, I lose stuff. It's a very vicious circle. I hate finals!" Lorelai ran her fingers through her hair and put her head on the page she had been reading.
"Nobody likes finals."
"Thank God I'm graduating and this is the last time I have to cram like this because my pursuit of higher education has led me to a very interesting discovery about myself. Do you wanna hear it?"
"Sure."
"I despise academics. Yup, learning, knowledge, it's all worthless. I have no idea in what you see in any of it."
"Learning is fun, plus for me there's that whole 'I'm a minor so it's mandatory' thing."
"That's what kills me – this is self-inflicted. I'm a masochist. I might as well be carrying a switch and periodically lacerating myself with it."
"That diploma hanging on the wall is going to make this all worthwhile, trust me."
"Now I'm committed to this stupid ceremony…" Lorelai felt differently when she was going to have Luke and Rory in the audience cheering her on, however now, Luke wouldn't be there, one of the most important days in her life and he wouldn't be there.
"Well, you've never been a part of an actual graduation ceremony. You'll get to move the tassel from one side to the other throw your cap in the air.
"My community college doesn't even have a lawn, if I throw my hat up it will hit the ceiling of the multi-use room. What if I take out someone's eye!"
"But you'll get to wear that gown and the hat… you know how you love fringe. And they call out your name and people clap and you get your diploma."
"What people? I've got you I'm good."
"Well, Sookie and Jackson may want to come…"
"That would be fun…" Lorelai said cautiously afraid that Rory was going to mention Luke again.
"And Grandma and Grandpa?"
"Oh, no. No, no, no."
"Come on, it's your graduation. They should be there."
"Forget it. They won't want to be there."
"Of course they will," Rory urged.
"Rory, I was supposed to graduate from high school. Go to Vassar. Marry a Yale man and get myself a proper nickname like Babe or Bunny or Shih Tzu."
"Yes but…"
"Instead, I got pregnant. I didn't finish high school, I didn't marry your father and I ended up in a career that apparently Jessica Hahn would think was beneath her. I humiliated them. The two proudest people in the world and I humiliated them. I spoiled their plans. I took their fine upbringing in a world of comfort and opportunity and I threw it in their faces. I broke their hearts and they'll never forgive me. I guess I can't expect them to."
"Maybe you're wrong about how they feel about all this. It was a long time ago."
"Rory, I don't want them to go. It'll just hurt them. . .and me, okay?"
"Okay. You should get back to your studying."
Lorelai looked back at her books then gasped.
"What?" Rory asked.
"I think I've already forgotten everything I read in the last two hours."
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Lorelai was relieved when her finals were over, the mad crunch of studying allowed her to forget the problems of her heart. Now that the scary finals were over, she felt as though a weight had lifted, still she had been hoping to celebrate the end of her academic career with Luke. As she walked into the house after her last final, her eyes went to the mantle and saw the empty place where the snow globe once stood. Lorelai moved throughout the rest of the house, feeling the lack of Luke in every nook and cranny. With her newfound weightlessness, and finally feeling overwhelmed with emotion she decided to go upstairs and sink into her bed and let tomorrow be another day.
Rory went up to her mother's room and was surprised to find her in bed already, "Hey, what is this?"
"Huh?"
"This, uh, 'Life Plan' book thingy."
"Oh, just a little gift for the grads from the happy people at Hartford Community College," Lorelai sighed.
Rory had to giggle at the little book, "Okay, here's an interesting question for you – 'Have you given any thought to how children will work into your future plans?'"
Lorelai hardly reacted, she just gave a mirthless rant from her pillow, "Oh, well, they're not going to stand in my way, that's for sure. I mean, I plan to have some, of course, but I'm just going to knock them out and have Nanny catch them and care for them, make sure Mick Jagger doesn't come anywhere near them and then just return them to me when they're twenty-one," she finished dully.
"What about me? "
"You are my favorite eldest child; you get to stay by my side. Always."
Rory could see it in Lorelai's face, "Mom are you sure you're okay?"
"Yeah finals are over!! Woo hoo!" Lorelai sighed from her pillow.
"Yeah and you're in bed at nine-thirty."
"Well, I'm a college graduate now, getting old, have to leave my partying ways behind me and be a responsible adult."
"Why don't you just go talk to him?"
"Rory, I'm far too busy."
"You're in your pajamas wide awake. You can go talk to him; maybe he wants to come to the ceremony?"
"Rory we'll talk when he is ready. Now turn off the light will you, I'm tired and I need my beauty sleep for my big day."
Rory felt bad for her mother, and wished that Luke would just talk to her mother already. Rory didn't know why he felt the need to keep his distance, but then she didn't know what had happened between them either. Still, her mother was graduating, this was an important event that couldn't be done over or recaptured and Luke was going to miss it. Even Grandma and Grandpa agreed to come, putting their differences aside for the greater good. Why couldn't Luke suck it up be a man and do the same?
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On her graduation day, Lorelai was surprised at work by Sookie with a tassel hat cake filled with two pounds of crushed chocolate-covered espresso beans in honor of her impending graduation. Lorelai tried not to think about her recent troubles, so what that she had invited her boyfriend to the ceremony, so what that this was a once in lifetime event that he was going to miss because they were fighting. Luke was going to have to deal with his choice and he would feel the appropriate amount of guilt should they ever one day have a reconciliation. There hadn't even been an official word between Luke and Lorelai of where they stood. No one said its over; no one said we are free to see other people. Lorelai took the piece of cake Sookie offered, and tried to enjoy it, but the taste of the espresso beans made Lorelai think of Luke. Suddenly her cell rang to save her from her lamenting thoughts, and she happily put down the cake that reminded her of her lost love, "Hello?"
"Hey, Lor."
"Chris, Hey Back."
Chris felt so good that they were back to being so friendly again, "Since we are on speaking terms again, I thought I'd see how the graduate was?"
"I'm good, I'm excited."
"You should be, it's a big day, and since I couldn't be there…Did you get my present?"
Lorelai gasped, "Present? What present? I love presents!"
"I know, it's a gift basket. You should've gotten it by now."
Lorelai found Michel refilling his coffee mug, "Hey, did a basket come for me?"
"Mm, it came, it was heavy, I felt a twinge so I dropped it for health reasons. It's probably still intact."
Lorelai rolled her eyes, "My crack staff has just informed me of its arrival. I'm going to find it," Lorelai hurried to her office and found two baskets on her desk. "Which one is it?"
"Which one? Well I'll say the Biggest one just to be safe," Chris joked.
Lorelai pulled off the card from the larger bloated one, "Looks like you're right, Oh wow!" she peaked at it's contents.
"I put it together myself," he said proudly.
"And it's all for me?"
"All for you. You deserve it."
Lorelai eagerly tore into the basket, "Ha! A twenty-five dollar savings bond."
"That's a long-term investment. Don't touch it for thirty years, you're looking at forty-five dollars."
"Ooh, a youth hostel card."
"For the young girl who doesn't mind sharing a bathroom with fifty strangers."
"What Color Is Your Parachute? A Practical Manual for Job Hunters."
"Helping you answer the two questions: what do you want to do and where do you want to do it?"
"A DVD of The Graduate, gotta have that. Ooh, The Portable Nietzsche."
"Light, cheery reading."
"An application to join the Armed Forces?"
"Well, if your dreams don't pan out and Nietzsche's no help, it's a viable option."
"And something in a nice little velvet box. Ooh, a necklace, and the pearl almost looks like something my mother would wear."
"Well, uh, it's a real pearl."
"That's not funny."
"This is not a funny gift."
"Christopher, this is extremely not funny. This is totally humorless. It's . . .it's beautiful. It 's too much."
"Nothing is enough for the woman who raised my daughter. I think you're awesome, Lor. Raising Rory the way you did, you're superwoman.
"Wow," Lorelai was breathless, she hadn't felt this special since…Luke. Lorelai thought she'd change the subject quickly before her mind dwell too much on the diner man. "Hey Chris, can I ask you something?"
"Ask away."
"Please, please tell me what's going on with you and Rory? I mean, has she called you at all… talked to you at all."
"Um yeah we've talked… a bit," Chris lied.
"It's just I'm still picking up some tension with her."
"Lor, it just something that has to work itself out."
"Are you sure? You want me to go to bat for you, because after this pearl I'd do anything you say."
Chris could have said something suggestive and dirty, but he didn't want to get into deeper trouble with his daughter "Actually I think it's best if you stay out of it, really. Um, have a great day. I wish I could be there. Take lots of pictures for me. Have a great night."
"Thanks, you too. Bye." Lorelai hung up her phone, she began to stare at the smaller, unassuming, humble basket beside Christopher's cornucopia of congratulations. Lorelai had a feeling about the smaller basket; she tore open the gift shrink-wrap, but hesitantly went through its contents as well.
There was no card with the basket, but Lorelai already knew whom it was from. She recognized various pastries, brownies, and bars from the diner. She found three - one pound bags of coffee with different roasts; Bavarian Chocolate, Hawaiian Hazelnut, and English Toffee. There was a pair of coffee scented candles, and trial sizes of flavored syrup, like peppermint, raspberry and coconut.
Huh? The only thing missing is a can of whipped cream. Lorelai looked back at the larger bloated basket. It was obvious that Chris had put a lot of thought into her gift, and a lot of money. When did he think to do this gesture? Did he prepare this before their fight? Was this his way of opening the lines of communication? Luke's economical basket had used his own pastries from the diner, yet the pastries had to have been made fresh. Did Luke make them recently despite their fight? They were not speaking, yet she did wonder where he got the different roasts of coffee. How much thought did he put into this? Where did he find coffee scented candles so she could buy more?
Even though they weren't speaking, Luke still thought to send her something for her graduation. A knot formed in Lorelai's stomach, missing Luke so much she didn't think she could hold in the tears anymore. She wanted to enjoy his pastries, to have a taste of him again, but she felt nauseous over the whole relationship at the same time.
Lorelai looked to heaven, trying to keep her sunshine face for the rest of the day. She wanted to crawl under her desk and cry, to hideaway, but she was the celebrity of the day, she had agreed to go through with the ceremony. Sookie and Rory were expecting her to be there. She just had to bury her feelings again, not think about Luke and his thoughtful gesture.
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Even before her ceremony began, Lorelai was dying without Rory there. She was already feeling uneasy about being the oldest one in her class, compounded when her mother had a film crew to document the occasion, embarrassing as all parents do when in public. Once some of the other graduates were giving her a hard time once they discovered she was the wealthy princess with the mother with the camera. Hello, I went to community college didn't I? I'm one of you!
Sookie and Jackson did their best to have Lorelai relax before the ceremony began, and not to worry about Rory. However, Lorelai was still looking for Rory while the speaker droned on about the achievement that it is to graduate from a community college at best. Lorelai felt like an idiot, she was the oldest one in her class, but when her name was called she straightened up and she saw Emily and Richard watching proudly as she accepted her diploma and moved her tassel to the other side of her cap. Lorelai was making her way down the stairs when she saw someone.
It wasn't Rory, it was Luke. Standing by himself in the back. Luke had come to the ceremony, just as he said he would before their fight. Lorelai's breath caught in her chest, suddenly Zach was behind her, "Keep the line moving princess, or would you like me to carry you down the stairs?"
"Can it, Zach," Lorelai went down the stairs to prevent an embarrassing bottle necking. When her eyes returned to the spot where Luke had been, he was gone, snuck out without a word to her. Had he even really been there? Or was she merely wishing and willing for his presence?
After the ceremony, Lorelai walked up to Emily and Richard, and kindly asked for a picture with her folks, touched that they were so moved by her achievement. Lorelai was surprised when Richard handed her an envelope with the wish that she "Put it towards something fun."
"Where's Rory? No Rory?"
Sookie eased, "She called. She said she's fine. She's sorry, but fine."
Lorelai was worried at why Rory hadn't shown up, but was mildly relieved that she had at least called, disappointed that her daughter wasn't there, and distracted by the Ghost of Luke. Lorelai couldn't help herself "Hey, um, did you happen to see Luke?"
Sookie was surprised that Lorelai brought it up, "I didn't think he was coming? You know with how you two are now…or not now… or whatever…"
"Oh I know, I mean he was going to come, before… but well, oh well." Maybe it was just her imagination.
"You want to go out to eat? Celebrate a little?"
"No, I think I'll just go home to Rory."
"I thought so," Sookie nodded, "See you tomorrow. Congratulations."
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After returning her cap and gown, Lorelai went straight to Stars Hollow, specifically to the diner.
Lorelai now knew where the spare key was hidden and let herself into the diner, and snuck up the staircase that led to Luke's apartment. She stood there for a good five minutes wondering if she should sneak in or knock. Before she could stop herself, she finally knocked on the door.
In a timely manner Luke answered and the look on his face told Lorelai he was surprised to see her.
"Hi," she said lamely.
"Umm, hi…" Luke was uncomfortable around her now, wondering if she came to apologize… again.
She took in his manner of dress, slacks and an button up shirt that was undone at the top, he had no doubt removed the tie the minute he got in his truck. "Meeting at the bank?" she offered casually, not usually how you would start a conversation with a man you had been sleeping with till just recently.
"Umm, yeah," Luke latched on to the excuse.
"Luke," she decided to level with him, "I saw you there…"
"Oh, okay" Luke was trying to make it not seem like a big deal and went silent again.
"I mean…despite…whatever is going on… or not going on between us anymore… well it meant a lot to me that you took the time… and came tonight anyway." He didn't even invite her in, just coldly barring her from entering his apartment where they could be alone, perhaps make up.
Luke only silently shook his head, trying to remain strong, to not be taken in by her again. Trying to remind himself of the hurtful things she said the night of the accident, against him, against Jess, against his family, but trying to erase them from history at the same time. Erase them so he could hold her and love her again, somehow… some day.
"Thank you for the basket."
"What basket?" he feigned.
"Luke," she leveled, "… the pastries are from the diner…you made them, you sent them… for me… please can't we … " Just as she was stepping toward him, Luke knew he was in danger of falling for her charms again and he backed away when she reached for him.
Lorelai could tell Luke was almost afraid of her, so she tried to ease her way in, "Luke… to your face I want to say I'm so very sorry. It was a bad night for all of us. I completely freaked out. I said some things . . .did you get my note? I wrote you a note. A few actually."
"Got your notes."
"You got my notes. Did you read my notes?"
"Read your notes. All were very well-written."
Lorelai burst, "Stop the robot talk! Luke, I said I was sorry."
"Yes, you did."
"Luke?…" Lorelai was exasperated. She thought his coming to see her graduate was a sign they could mend the damage. She couldn't believe this was her boyfriend from a few weeks ago, "So, this is how it's gonna be with us now, huh?"
"What?"
"You're pulling a Mr. Freeze on me, Lorelai, your girlfriend."
"I'm not pulling a Mr. Freeze on you," he maintained evenly.
"Luke, look I know it wasn't really your fault, but Rory was in the hospital. I was all over the place…"
"Jess could have gotten hurt too? It could have just as easily been Jess in the hospital!"
"I know I see that now…"
"Lorelai what is it you want?"
Some emotion I'm shocked, "I want my Luke back."
"And what about Christopher? What do you want from him?"
"What?"
"It didn't take too long for Chris to come here..."
"Hello, he's her father, he just might be concerned about Rory's well being..."
"Well, he was so quick to react in November? When she needed him for the Ball!"
"No, you won that title."
"Lorelai… I just…" Luke struggled for the words… to pull the thoughts he had since he saw Chris and her dancing through the window, "it's…it's just…"
"It's what?" Lorelai challenged.
Luke finally said what he had been thinking since he sent Jess on that bus, "It wasn't supposed to be me, okay!"
"What are you talking about?"
"That night, the ball, me presenting Rory, it wasn't supposed to be me. It should have been Christopher. He should have been there for his daughter then…"
"But he wasn't!" Lorelai dismissed.
Luke ignored her, "… he should have been there to talk you down off the ledge, he should have been the one to…" sleep with you, Luke trailed off because he got a little sick thinking of Lorelai with the infamous Christopher.
"But it wasn't him, it was you," you're the one I love.
"We should have never have happened!" Luke shouted.
Lorelai's eyes bugged out, "I can't believe you just said that to me. After everything we've been through. The ball. My parents New Year's party. The basket auction. Uncle Louie and you think none of that should have happened!!"
"Lorelai, it was a mistake, the whole deal, you and me, it was one stupid, impulsive mistake. How do I know that you aren't just biding time with me until Christopher the Great is available, comes riding in on his white horse to save you from a life with me, you sleep with him whenever he comes to town anyway… "
Out of nowhere, Lorelai's hand slapped Luke hard across his jaw.
Luke stood there with his head turned to the right no longer looking at Lorelai, his face still stinging from the blow. That pretty much ended that argument, and the relationship for that matter. Even though he wasn't looking at her he could hear Lorelai starting to cry.
Luke's tone remained neutral, he couldn't find the courage to look her in the face, "I have deliveries in the morning."
His indifference hurt her, as well as his sharp words, his outrageous declaration, Lorelai turned to leave.
All Luke heard was her heels on his hard wood floor then his door slam. You big idiot! His mouth was too quick for his brain.
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Lorelai got out of the Jeep, Luke's dismissal still stinging at her heart, her slap to his face still stinging her hand. She walked to the porch and saw her distraught daughter sitting there waiting for her. Lorelai took in her daughter's appearance; nothing new appeared to be broken, as Lorelai examined the cast. Lorelai was angry that of all the people to not witness it was her daughter while her apparent ex-boyfriend was able to attend.
Rory stood up from the steps and immediately went into apology without so much as taking a breath. "I'm so, so sorry. I know you're hurt. I know this was a once in a lifetime thing. I should've been there. It was so stupid…"
Lorelai's crossed arms and hard expression seemed to say, for missing my graduation someone better have died…
"I cut school!" Rory confessed.
Lorelai's expression softened only slightly, but only from surprise.
"I cut school and I got on a bus and I don't even know why I did it. I. . .I have no excuse. I was just standing outside of Chilton, and I don't know, I must have had a stroke or something. What does a stroke feel like? …So I left school and I got on a bus and I went to New York…"
Lorelai's eyes widened, you went to New York?
Rory continued, "…And that's it! I cut school and I went to New York without permission and I'm grounded for six months, or seven, and no TV, no stereo, no reading. In fact, take all of my books away from me and lock them up. And no magazines, either. And I'm going to do all of the housework. Laundry, dishes. . . in fact, we're going to start eating at home so that we have dishes…." Seeing Lorelai was getting bored with her rambling Rory winced as she said, "I don't know what happened, but… I went…to see Jess."
Lorelai tsked to say figures, as she rolled her eyes.
"I know what you're thinking but I went for you and Luke!" Rory blurted out, "I wanted to know what happened and I thought maybe he would have an answer for me….but I couldn't reach him… then miraculously out of the blue he called last night and I thought yes how we can get some answers…"
He called you? Lorelai tried to put the pieces together.
"…In fact, you should take the phone away from me, too. That's right, add it to the list. No books, no music, no phone. I know I'm a horrible person. I missed my own mother's graduation, granted it's hard for kids to miss their parent's graduation because usually they aren't born yet, but we have special circumstances and a special bond and I don't want you to be mad at me for missing this important life event. I am sick, I'm ill, I'm cracked. This is not who I am. If I were to write this down in my diary and I would read it, I would be like, Who is this freak? This isn't me. This isn't my diary. I wouldn't do this. I wouldn't skip school when I have finals coming up to go on a Scooby Doo Mystery solving tour with Batman and Robin which made me miss my mother's graduation, which I wanted to be at so badly. I mean, I missed your graduation, which is the worst thing I could have possibly done. I mean, I hurt you and I had to spend hours on a stinky bus next to a guy that was spitting into a can because I didn't think to take an express bus, just thinking about all of the minutes that were going by that I wasn't at your graduation and they were hurting you, and they shouldn't have been hurting you. You should beat me, ground me, and take the phone away…"
Maybe the reason you went to New York is because you are falling for Jess; Lorelai ignored Rory's rambling and just went inside too, upset to deal with her daughter's nonsense and teenage confusion.
"Mom? Mom please… say something…yell at me, ground me, anything…" Rory followed her mother in the house and watched as Lorelai put her purse and keys on the foyer table. "Okay, okay silent treatment…we can work with that for a while… I'll go to my room and think about what I've done." Rory knew she needed to calm down she had to find the words and a time to tell her mother about Luke's planned proposal. Spending the Day with Jess he told her everything, of the ring, of meeting with Richard, everything…
Lorelai merely trudged the stairs to be alone in her room. She hated her room now. This was where they first made love, and Lorelai sighed heavily. She walked over to her closet and opened up her Luke box. Rory had hidden it in the garage as Lorelai had requested, but Lorelai had been determined to find it. There were mallomars, the best cookie in the world and perfect comfort food, the When Harry Met Sally they watched on New Year's Day, the basket from the auction, the plastic mistletoe from Christmas, one of Luke's ties, one of Luke's flannel shirts she had pilfered, and of course the beloved snow globe.
She felt very drained from her day, and wished she had brought Luke's gift basket home for some special gourmet coffee from Luke, but she had given the gourmet coffee away on principal. It must have been the coffee withdrawal because obviously she wasn't thinking clearly. Besides even if she had it, she would have to face groveling Rory again to brew it. Lorelai then made a note to buy a coffee machine for her room. However, Lorelai had been having caffeine withdrawal headaches since their fight, so she slept all the time when she wasn't at work or keeping up a brave face for Rory, and when she was at work, she was Zombie Lorelai, listening and interacting with people just enough to get through the day.
Lorelai succumbed to her wallow, it was the only way she was going to get over Luke. She slipped out of her dress and changed into Luke's flannel and taken the snow globe and mallomars to the bed. She lay in bed, with the box of mallomars, holding the globe and shaking it, smiling at the little Luke and Lorelai in the sleigh, thinking of happier times and what might have been. Then when she reached for another mallomar, the snow globe tipped over and bounced once on the mattress. At first Lorelai's heart stopped in her chest because she thought for certain it was going to fall off the bed and shatter on the floor in a million pieces. She could see it in her mind; hear the crash in her mind, the final symbol that it was over. It less dramatically rolled on to its side and Lorelai got her first glimpse at the underside. She had never thought to look at the bottom of the base before. Slowly and hesitantly she reached for it to read the engraved words in the lamplight.
The base had Luke's penmanship carved into it:
To
Lorelai,
It had to be you,
Love
Luke
It was their song. The song they danced to at the ball. He had the globe made even before their trip to the Birch Grove Spa, where they danced to that same song at that sixty-forty bar. Luke loved her, he could have been the one…and in classic Lorelai Gilmore fashion, she screwed it all up.
A wave of depression took her down to her pillow and she cried herself to sleep again, holding the globe close to her heart.
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"That was all God given talent"
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TBC…
A/N: more behind the scenes of PLD from localizy
localizy: did I tell you I nearly cried when I read the huge fight with Luke and Lorelai where Lorelai slaps him
GG1979: no you didn't!
localizy : I DID!
GG1979 : I'm so proud of myself
GG1979 : I almost got you, of all people, to cry!!
GG1979 : wow
localizy : it takes a lot to make me nearly cry
GG1979: I know!! that's why I'm so proud
localizy : I felt all the emotion from them both
localizy : I was like
localizy : why can't these crazy kids just get together
localizy : I'm like chandler who cries because Ross and Rach can't work it out
GG1979: I'm astonished!
A/N: In spite of your recent venom, I LOVE ALL OF YOU and am using Frank:
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWER:
You promise me this, you promise me that
You promise me anything under the sun
Then you let ASP take over your brain,
And cliffhanger us with that
what you have written cannot be undone
When I think of the time gone by
GG1979:
Okay Calm down!
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
And I think of the way I tried!
GG1979:
I'm updating faster now!
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
I could honestly die.
GG1979:
Call a lawyer and sue me,
Sue me
read and review me,
I love Luke.
Give a holler and hate me
Hate me
fill my inbox and hate me!
I LOVE LUUUUUUUKE!
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
The best years of my life, I was a fool to give you
GG1979(shrugs):
Alright, already, I'm just a no-goodnick!
Alright, already, it's true.
So new.
So sue me, sue me
trust and review me?
I love Luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuke
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
You gamble it here,
You gamble it there
You gamble on everything, all except me
And I'm sick of you keeping L/L up in the air
Till your back in the fresh ideas again
When I think of the time gone by
GG1979:
I've got it all worked out, really!
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
And I think of the way I tried!
GG1979:
I had to bring Chris back he's Rory's father!
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
I could honestly die.
GG1979:
Serve a paper and sue me, sue me
read and review me,
I love Luke.
Give a holler and hate me,
Hate me,
Tar, feather and hate me!
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
When you wind up in jail
Don't come to me to bail you out!
GG1979:
Alright, already, so call a policeman!
Alright, already, it's true
So new
So sue me, sue me
trust and review me?
I love Luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuke!
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
You're at it again,
You're running with Chris
I'm not gonna play second fiddle to that.
And I'm telling you now that we're through!
When I think of the time gone by
GG1979:
You're over reacting, you know that?
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
And I think of the way I tried!
GG1979:
I'm not done yet!!
FANFICTION READER/REVIEWERS:
I could honestly die.
GG1979: (puts on a fedora borrowed from Localizy):
Sue me, sue me
Shoot bullets through me
I love Luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuke!!
(Walks off to write the next chapter…)
I love Frank Sinatra…
See you in the next chapter…
R/R: PLEASE, I like to better myself. To quote The Princess Bride,
"...Remember this is for posterity ... so be honest."
Please be specific with R/R; name one (or as many as you can think of or want to mention…) At least one specific thing you liked
Please! It makes me feel good...inside (Dirty!)
Hence the Rant option below.
Insert Rant here V
A/N: if not completely satisfied with this chapter, please return unused portion for a full refund...