Perverts, Freaks, and Lovers
Perverts, Freaks, and Lovers
By: Crack God (used to be Aoshi Master of the Kodachi)
So Far:
Chapter 1: Sasuke and Naruto left the village to train. Kakashi is super perverted and pops into Sakura's room for his perverted reasons. Sakura gets really mad and yells that she will kill her sensei and blame it on Rock Lee. Kakashi leaves only to have Lee show up. Then things got sappy.
Chapter 2: Lee was about to ask Sakura out, but he fell from her window and had to go to the hospital. The next morning, Kakashi popped into Sakura's bathroom right after she had her period. Sakura beats him up, so he too has to go to the hospital. Then the kunoichi gets her next mission, a mission that has meeting Sasuke on the line.
Chapter 3: Sakura visits the library and learns a perverted jutsu (for her mission; which is to spy on Gai and his students) inside a book that was written by Kakashi himself, although she didn't know whom the author was. Then the kunoichi starts her new mission. Oddly, when she sees a rabbit while spying on Gai and his students she gets so confused she can't even think straight. Luckily, she managed to pass the mission without being caught.
Chapter Four
Okay, just to let you know, this chapter is action and humor, so if you are reading this just for humor you should skip to the Sakura and Kakashi part, which should be marked by the line break thing-majig. Sorry to those who just read for the romance and humor, but I thought action might get me some more reviews. The next chapter will be almost 100 humor and romance. Anyway, on with chapter four!
Rock Lee and Tenten left Gai to go home, but Neji seemed to still be meditating. But then, two minutes after his teammates left, Neji opened his eyes. Then he stood and walked towards his sensei.
"Are you going to tell Kakashi that Sakura was really spotted during her mission?" Neji asked Gai sensei.
"Oh, so you noticed as well," Gai replied. "And not even by using your byakugan eye, impressive. But, then again, you are my star pupil. I guess that I'll let you yourself decide if we should tell Kakashi that we were able to detect Sakura."
"I have no intentions of telling Kakashi that," Neji said coolly. "I still need to test my full strength upon Sasuke Uchiha. And, from what I heard, Kakashi shall take Sakura to see him as long as Kakashi believes that Sakura actually passed this mission. So all I have to do is to follow them in order to fight Sasuke."
"Very well," Gai spoke calmly. "I'll make it a team mission for you, Lee, and Tenten to fight- and defeat- Kakashi's squad. I'll then finally be able to prove to Kakashi that we're stronger than they are. I'll tell Lee and Tenten in the morning."
"Heh, you're actually a pretty decent sensei when you don't ramble on about youthfulness and that kind of stuff," Neji smirked.
"I'll pretend that I didn't hear you say that last remark," Gai sensei said. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow, Neji." With that, Gai sensei walked of into the mouths of the shadows that were engulfing the area, leaving Neji all alone.
When I meet up with Sasuke I will send him into an eternal death Neji thought to himself. His sharigan eye will be no match for my byakugan eye. I shall teach him the truest meaning of the word 'pain'.
"You're out late, Neji," a cold voice almost hissed out. From out of no where a red-haired boy with wearing a headband from the Village Hidden in the Sand suddenly appeared.
"Gaara!" Neji spat as he turned around to see the ninja. "What the hell do you want?"
"It's useless to try to defeat Sasuke, that is when I kill him first, anyway," Gaara smirked as if he had been reading Neji's mind. "My team just happens to be visiting the island where Sasuke and Naruto are training, and in just a couple days as well, so give up fighting Uchiha."
"Sasuke is stronger and more skilled than you, and I'm better than Sasuke, so if I were you I'd shut up," Neji barked. "Unless you have what it takes to prove me wrong, I suggest that you leave me now."
"If it's a fight you want, I'll gladly accept it," Gaara replied in response. "How do you expect to defeat me if you're not even part of the main branch of the Hyuga clan, and thus you can easily be defeated?"
Now agitated, Neji activated his bloodline trait, the byakugan, and dove in upon an unexpected Gaara with a Hyuga taijutsu palm-strike. In response, Gaara's sand barrier activated, but Neji just sliced through it with a knife hand that also hit his opponent's collarbone. The battle between Gaara from sand and Neji from leaf had begun.
Gaara's sand regrouped, but was only shattered by another one of Neji's palm-strikes. But then the sand smothered and smoldered over Neji's body, trying to suffocate him.
While Neji was trapped, Gaara punched and kicked at his defenseless opponent. "If you give up now I will spare your life," Gaara sneered.
"Why would I do that when I'm winning?" Neji questioned with confidence, now behind Gaara.
Gaara quickly controlled his sand so that it moved away from the area that Neji had just been trapped in. But all what was there was an old log. The Hyuga had simply used the substitution jutsu.
Swiftly, Neji bombarded Gaara's neck with a series of several palm-strikes and knife-hands. However, after the attacks stopped a puff of smoke appeared. Then Gaara and five clones of himself appeared and all threw kunai at Neji. Shadow clone jutsu! Neji thought to himself as if he was expecting his enemy to use that jutsu.
The Hyuga boy effortlessly caught all of the kunai with a single hand, while not even injuring himself. He powerfully threw five of them, but kept a single one. All five kunai bolted into the real Gaara's flesh, causing blood to squirt out in several places. Then, with puffs of smoke, Gaara's shadow clones dissipated.
"Kakashi, they didn't see me!!" Sakura exclaimed the very second she swung the door open to the room inside the hospital that her sensei was inside of.
Sakura's eyes widened, in pure horror (possibly in slight, very slight fascination). This room was definitely not where Kakashi had been the last time she had seen him. This room was the men's bathroom.
The kunoichi hastily exited the men's bathroom and slammed the door shut behind her, hoping that nobody and seen her huge mistake.
"Getting a little curious now huh, Sakura?" Kakashi said, walking out of his real hospital room, facing his female student. All of his wounds had been completely healed, thanks to the science of chakra. "If you really want to know, I will be glad to show you myself."
"KKAAAAAAKASSHHIIIIIII, YOUUUUUUU, PERVERTTT!!" Sakura roared.
"Hey, don't get mad at me. It's not like I'm the one who just went into the bathroom for my own opposite gender," Kakashi sensei calmly replied with a slight smirk underneath his black mask that only covered up approximately half of his whole face.
"It was a freakin' accident!!" Sakura protested, her voice filled with anger. "I thought that it was the room where you were in when you gave me the mission!"
"So what you're saying is that you can't even read a simple sign for a bathroom?" Kakashi sensei questioned.
"I was preoccupied, okay!!" Sakura sat out the words.
"Anyway, past the issue where you can't read, do you want me to show you or not?" Kakashi smugly asked.
"I'M GOING TO KIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" Sakura yelled, grabbing a kunai.
The kunoichi darted over to her sensei and repeatingly slashed him with her weapon. What the hell does he think he's doing!! Cha!! Inner Sakura exclaimed in mighty fury.
Five minutes later, Kakashi was in a room labeled 'Life Support', the only room in the hospital that meant that the wounds were so severe that they couldn't be healed with chakra. Sakura had definitely gone overboard this time, and that's definitely for sure.
What was even worse was that several nurses had seen Sakura assault Kakashi and now the kunoichi was going to be trialed in the Ninja Court of Law.
While Gaara's guard was down, Neji pounded the young ninja from sand. Using the Hyuga form of taijutsu, he released even more of his own chakra inside Gaara's body to destroy him from the inside.
Suddenly, sand from all directions surrounded Gaara in numbers at least five times the number than before. Neji tried to break threw the barrier, but the sand was too thick to puncture all the way through. The sand was so thick that Neji's byakugan eye couldn't even see through it.
Neji jumped backwards and prepared to use the sixty-four points of divinity. The yin-yang sign appeared, and then Neji's technique began.
"Two points!" Neji yelled as he swiftly pecked through the thick sand, damaging the sand barrier.
"Four points!" This time the sand barrier was completely demolished, revealing Gaara, who was now surrounded by visible chakra.
"Eight points!" Neji's assaults collided with Gaara, forcing the sand ninja to step back. Between the jabs, Gaara started to gather energy for his new technique.
"Sixteen points!" The Hyuga boy hit Gaara with speeding attacks, all landing without fail. Gaara's technique became completely visible as an orange glow engulfed his right hand with massive amounts of chakra. Gaara's eyes glowed bloodshot red.
"Thirty-two points!" Neji's palm-strikes, knife-hands, and pecks Blasted upon Gaara in the arms and torso. Chakra started to erupt from the sand ninja's right hand. Dust and debree flew amongst the area, but Neji now was using his byakugan eye.
"SIXTY-FOUR POINTS!!" Neji's voice echoed as he performed the final step in the sixty-four points of divinity. Gaara darted forward as he unleashed is almighty powerful technique. The sand and debree cycloned around the two ninja, surrounding both of them.
Shortly afterwards, the cycling wall calmed down. Then within the fading wall the blurred outline of the victor could be seen standing.
I hoped you liked chapter four! You probably hate me for the ending, but if you continue to read this author's note you'll see why I ended it the way I did. Anyway, since I'm debating with myself for what's going next, I NEED YOU TO REVIEW and tell me what you think should happen next. In fact, I'm going to have all of you readers vote for what you think should happen in a few categories. The following are the main categories that I'd like you to vote on:
What should happen to Kakashi?
What should happen to Sakura? (Ruled innocent or guilty by the judge, doesn't even show up for trial, ect.)
Who should win the fight; Neji or Gaara? (Sorry to those who just read the Sakura and Kakashi part, so if you only read that part you don't have to vote on this category, but if you want to you can.)
I look forward to the results, so please review!