I woke to sensation of my arm tingling, tiny pin pricks shivered down its length letting me know that it was not getting the circulation it needed. Without opening my eyes, I tried to shift, to move it so that it could have the blood it wanted. Then I realized it was trapped. Unable to twist my arm free of the weight pressing down on it, I opened my eyes slowly, blinking against the moonlight pouring in from the blinds.

When I managed to focus them finally I wasn't sure exactly what I was seeing at first. It looked to me to be a mass of blackness. I shifted again, squinting as I tried to make sense of what was laying beside him.

The mass began to take shape slowly and a felt a heavy weight descending to the pit of my stomach. What the hell had I done ?

I jumped as memories from the night before slowly caught up with me. Hazy scenes played through my mind of Dobbler's and whiskey and beer and a lot of people.

I tried to drag my arm out from under the woman lying beside me without waking her. Talking to her at the moment was the last thing I wanted to do.

My still reeled as I tried to piece together the circumstances that had brought Rebbecca Logan to my bed, naked.

Wait, I sneaked a quick peak under the comforter that covered her from the shoulders down. Yep, naked.

Fuck !

" Cappie, " she muttered, as she rolled over towards me, her eyes searching me out.

Well at least she knew exactly where she was and what had happened.

I thought about diving for the bed, laying still and pretending I was still asleep. But her gaze landed on me before I had the chance. Damn, this just keeps getting better and better.

" My arm fell asleep. " I mumbled lamely.

" Oh, " she answered into the darkness. " I'm sorry. I guess I was laying on it. "

" It's okay. "

Then she moved over to me and rested her head against my chest. I didn't know what to say. I didn't want her laying on me. I wanted her gone. I wanted to pretend this had never happened.

I shifted a bit, trying to find a comfortable position. This never happened with Casey, I never had to search around for a comfortable way to lay with her against me.

Fuck again ! Casey !

She was never going to forgive me for this. She'd say it didn't matter. Tell me that she didn't have the right to tell me who I could have sex with and who I couldn't. But it would be a lie. Every time she looked at me, she would see Rebbecca from then on.

I looked down at the small girl resting against me and knew in that moment that as soon as Casey found out about this, it would truly be over between us. I had done the unthinkable in her eyes. Betrayed her the same way Evan had. Now I was no better than him. That's how she would see it. I knew it like I knew that Rebbecca would never keep this just between us.

" Are you okay ? " Her voice was a little muffled against my chest.

" Yeah, I'm good. " I lied.

" You were tossing and turning. I thought I heard you mumbling something. " she said, leaning up so she could look at me.

" Yeah, " I sighed. " I've been told I talk in my sleep. "

She raised her hand, and brushed the back of her fingers over my cheek. I almost flinched away from her, but the tenderness behind the gestured surprised me.

" You said her name. " It was a simple statement. There was no anger in her tone. No malice in her words. Just a simple statement of fact.

" Who's name ? " I asked, playing stupid. I knew it wouldn't work.

" You know who's name. " she smiled quietly. " How long has it been since you broke up ? "

I looked away quickly. " A little over a year. "

" Over a year and you still call her name in your sleep ? " I thought she was teasing me and I was instantly on the defensive, but when I looked back at her there was no humor in her eyes, just sadness.

" Yeah, that's what I've been told anyway. " I muttered.

" Does she know you still love her like that ? "

" Do we really have to talk about this ? " I moved, displacing her from my chest.

" I just want to understand. " I said, coming back to me, but not laying against me this time.

" What do you want to understand ? What is it that you want to know ? " I leaned up on my elbow.

She looked at me, searching my face for an answer to a question she hadn't asked yet. " What is it about her that is so damned special ? What does she have that the rest of us don't ? "

" Is that why you hate her so much ? Because you think she has some special power over us stupid men ? " I was trying to turn the conversation around on her, draw it away from me.

She laughed. " I don't think she has a special power. But she has something. Something that makes everyone want her. " She looked away all the humor gone from her eyes. " I want to understand what it is. "

I laid back with my hands behind my head. " I can't help you there. I don't know what it is myself. "

" I know she's beautiful, " she paused, " if you go for that blond, big eyed thing. But she's not that beautiful. I mean, it's like some kind of phenomenon around here. Everyone either wants her or wants to be her. I just don't get it. "

I sighed, deciding she was not going to let it drop. " Okay, I don't know about Chambers. I can't tell you what his deal with her is. "

" She's his trophy. " she interrupted.

I raised up again and looked at her. " Excuse me ? "

" That's what she is to him. His prize. I saw it the first time I met them together. It's pretty obvious. " she explained. " Or maybe it's just obvious to me because my father looks at his wife exactly the way Evan looks at Casey. Like she's an expensive piece of jewelry that he wears on his arm. "

I dropped back down to the pillow and thought about what she was saying. Sometimes the most amazing insights come from the places you least expect them.

" Now what is it with you ? You don't look at her like that. It's different with you. "

" I love her. " I said quietly, staring up at the ceiling.

" Well, that's pretty obvious, too. What I mean is why ? She dumped you, threw you over for the pretty boy with more money and more power and you still say her name in her sleep. I don't understand that. You seem smarter than that. " She went on.

" I don't know. I've tried to get over her. God knows I've tried. But we had something, you know. It wasn't just the normal college fling. It was... special. " I tried to explain it to her and found that I was coming up lacking. It wasn't something you could put into words.

" You know she's going to freak when she finds out about this ? " she said, laying her head down on the pillow next to me.

" Are you going to tell her ? " I was holding my breath waiting on the answer I knew was about to come.

" I'm not sure. " she answered. It surprised me a little. " Maybe I could keep it just between us if you did me a favor. "

I leaned up again. " You're blackmailing me ? "

She laughed. " Blackmailing you ? Well I guess you could call it that. "

Now she really had my attention. What could Rebbecca Logan possibly want from me ?

" What is it you want ? "

" I want you to get her back. " she said.

It was my turn to laugh. " I'm not even sure that's possible. Besides, what's it matter to you ?"

" I like you, Cappie. You seem like a pretty decent guy. " she told me. " I hate to think about you laying here at night calling her in your sleep. I know what it must be like for you having to watch with Evan all the time, knowing he doesn't love her like you do. "

Ah, now I was understanding. Now I saw her angle. " And if I do manage to get her back, someone will need to be there to pick up the pieces of Evan's poor shattered heart. " I added knowingly.

She shrugged and gave me a smug smile. " Well, there is always that as well. So see, it works out for both of us. "

I woke with a start, the images from my last night on campus still fresh in my mind. I looked beside me, afraid I had disturbed the sleeping form that lay against me, but Casey was still, other than the rhythmic rise and fall of her chest.

I settled back against the bed and nestled into her, burying my head in her hair and drawing in the sweet smell of vanilla and lavender.

The soft gray light of dawn was seeping through the light blue curtains of my room. Soon the entire house would be awake once again. I needed to wake her. She had to sneak back across the hall to her own room before that happened. I had managed to gain some ground with her father, I didn't want to lose it by him finding his little girl in my bed. But I couldn't bring myself to let her go yet.

I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her in closer to my chest.

She stirred and sighed as she moved her hand over mine and held in firmly to her waist.

" Good morning. " she whispered in a sleepy, hoarse voice that sent a chill down my spine.

" Good morning. " I answered against her ear.

She rolled towards me and buried her head in my chest, laying a soft kiss to my skin. " I should be getting back to my room. "

" Yeah, you probably should. " I said, though I made no move to let her go.

She looked up at me. " Are you okay ? You look like something's bothering you. "

I forced a smile I wasn't really feeling and kissed her softly. " What could possibly be bothering me ? "

" You tell me. " she said, pulling back from me and brushing her thumb against my cheek.

I hated that she knew me that well. Hated that I was completely unable to hide anything from her. Guilt from my night with Rebbecca plagued me as I lay there tucked against her warm body. I just wasn't ready to tell her about it. I needed to hold on to her for a while longer. To finally have everything I'd wanted and needed in my arms for more than just a moment in time.

So, I pushed the thoughts of Rebbecca from my mind forcefully and kissed her.

" I love you. " I whispered when I finally pulled away.

" And why is that bothering you ? " she smiled.

" Nothing is bothering me. " I insisted.

The smile fell from her lips. " You aren't having doubts about last night ? Second thoughts, maybe ? "

I held her tighter. " Absolutely not. "

" Because if you are, I want to talk about it. " she continued.

I stilled her with a kiss, letting her know without words that I had no doubts about wanting her.

It was almost an hour later when she finally made it across the hall.

I lay there for a long time, knowing that I wouldn't be returning to sleep. My mind still replaying the dream that had woken me in the first place still playing through my mind. Rebbecca had not been what I expected. Well she was a little like I expected, but there was something more under the surface of the shallow, contrite exterior that surprised me. I still didn't remember actually having sex with her. I felt a little guilty about that, too. She deserved more than that. No woman deserved to be forgotten like that.

As the full light of morning began to take over the room, I still couldn't make myself stop feeling guilty for what I had done to Casey. More importantly, I felt guilty for keeping it from her. I had never kept anything from her. We had never had secret between us. Sooner or later, I would have to come clean. I would have to tell her about my night with Rebbecca. I shudder as I imagined how that conversation was going to turn out. Still, I felt even more guilty for putting it off. But I couldn't' tell her yet. She wasn't even ready to tell me she loved me again. Bringing this new revelation into the mix would undoubtedly ruin everything I had gained so far. I knew it was selfish. I knew I should tell her now rather than later. But I couldn't. I wouldn't, not yet.

A knock at my door brought my attention back to my surroundings and I called a quick " Come in, " as I heard Rusty asking from the other side if I was awake.

He entered the room and shut the door behind him securely. His face was stark white as he came and sat down numbly on the foot of the bed.

I quirked my eyebrows at him. " You okay, Buddy ? "

" Derek called this morning. " he said distractedly.

" Really ? Is everything okay with him ? " I tried to draw him out.

" Yeah, " he mumbled. " My mom invited him to lunch. "

I nodded. " Well, that sounds nice. " I sat up and nudged him in the shoulder. " What's up ? Come on, it's too early in the morning for me to guess. "

He turned to me with wide fearful eyes. The deer in the headlights look almost made me laugh out loud, but I held it in, waiting for his explanation. " He's bringing Hannah. Hannah is coming here for lunch, today. At my house. "

" Breath. " I commanded him as I slapped him on the back.

He let his lungs go with a loud gush of air. " It's going to be okay, Russ. She's just a girl. "

He nodded slowly. " She's just a girl. " he mumbled. Then he shook his head quickly and looked at me with a terrified expression. " No, she's not just a girl. She's the girl. "

" Rusty, " I said, throwing as much force and authority into my voice as I could manage. " You need to get a hold of yourself. "

He sat up a little straighter and shook his head to clear it. " You're right. I need to get a grip. She's just a girl. I can handle lunch with her. "

" Of course you can. It'll be fine. " I reassured him.

Then he started to shake his head again. " It's not going to be okay. I'm going to screw it up. I'm going to do or say something stupid. "

" You aren't going to do anything stupid. " I told him, though honestly I figured in his current condition, he was most certainly going to do something stupid. " I've got your back, Man. I'll get you through it. I'll be your wingman. "

He nodded numbly again. " Yeah, my wingman. " Then he turned to me, grabbing my arms in a panic.

" I have nothing to wear. "

That was it. I held it in as long as I could. But at that revelation, I could no longer contain the laughter that was bubbling inside me. He looked shocked as I laughed heartily.

" What is going on in here ? " Casey asked, sticking her head inside the door.

" Rusty is having an issue over our lunch guests. " I told her as I managed to calm myself.

" And who are our lunch guests ? "

I explained what was happening and to her credit she handled it much better than I had, assuring her younger brother that we would find him something suitable to wear and help him get through the lunch.

He seemed grateful to her and raised his eyebrow slightly at me as she came to rest beside me and kissed me.

I smiled back at him before sliding my arm around her waist.

" Oh, I see. You know, " he got up and looked at us in what I assumed was supposed to be a serious expression. " I brought him here with me. " he told Casey. " You can't just go around stealing my friend like this. "

Casey looked wounded but it only lasted for a moment before Rusty caught my eye and we both broke out laughing again.

She nearly knocked him over with a well placed pillow missile to his chest. " Very funny. " she muttered before joining our laughter.