Not surprisingly none of us got very much sleep. Casey and I were awake most of the night, not really talking but just laying in each others arms, enjoying being together. I still felt, somewhere deep down that I was living on borrowed time. Like any moment she would be lost to me again.

I must have dozed off at some point, when I woke, Casey was sitting on the bench under her window, staring at the outside world with a faraway look on her face.

I laid there for a while, watching her, wondering what she was thinking. I could see the thoughts passing over her face. I couldn't tell what they were, but I could see they were important. It was evident in the little furrow between her brows. She only got that look when her thoughts were complicated and deep.

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I shucked off the blanket that covered me and went to her, wrapping my arms around her protectively.

" I can't stop thinking about Rusty. " she offered before I had a chance to ask. " I hate that this is happening to him. "

" We don't know anything for sure yet. There's still a chance that everything will be fine. " I told her in what I hoped was a reassuring tone.

She covered my hand that rested on her shoulder, with hers and squeezed it. She took a deep breath and shook her head as if she were physically shaking off all the worrying thoughts from her mind.

" So what did you get me for Christmas ? " she smiled.

I stepped back and covered my heart with my hand. " Was I supposed to get you something ? I didn't know we were doing that. "

She put her hands on her hips and gave me an exasperated look. " You better have gotten me something and it had better be good. "

" And what if I didn't ? " I continued to tease her.

She considered that for a moment. " Then I'll make you sleep in your own room for the rest of the time you're here. "

I chuckled. " And what about when we get back to campus ? You still going to make me sleep alone then ? "

" I just might. "

" Then I guess I better hit the mall tomorrow. " I shrugged. " I hate to sleep alone. "

" The mall on Christmas Eve ? Good luck with that. "

" Yeah, I know. I can't believe I put it off until now, but I did. I guess I've been busy in the last week or so. "

We went back to the bed and settled in comfortably.

" Did you call your parents today ? You mentioned that you were going to try. " she asked.

" I tried. They didn't answer. Probably too far off the beaten path for cell phones. "

" Does it bother you that they aren't around much ? "

I nodded against the pillow. " Not really. I guess it would be nice to have a family like yours everyone gathering together for the holidays and all that, but like I said before, I'm really proud of my folks. They are definitely strong people. They speak up about the things they believe in. You have no idea how many times I had to stay with my grandparents because they got arrested at some protest or another. "

" That sounds awful to me. " she shivered. " Having your parents in jail and getting shipped off to stay with whoever would take you. "

" It was a little awful. Did I ever tell you that the first five years of my life I lived in a tent. Then social services found out and threatened to take me away if they didn't get a real place for us to live. " I told her.

" No, you never told me that. That's horrible. " she said quietly.

" No it really wasn't it. I didn't see anything wrong with it. It wasn't until someone showed up and told me it was wrong that I even thought about it. And even then, I still didn't see the problem. I had two parents that loved me. We spent all our time together. We had everything we needed. "

" But still, it must have been hard on you. " she commented.

" It wasn't that hard. It's not like we were living in poverty or anything like that. My parents have money. We aren't poor. They're just idealists. They have principals and things they believe in, they wanted me to have those same principals. " I tried to explain to her.

" And do you ? Do you believe in the same things your parents believe in ? "

I chuckled. "I think my folks are a little disappointed in me. I have grown very used to air conditioning and a refrigerator to keep the beer cold. A stream just doesn't get it as frosty. "

" I'm sure they aren't disappointed in you. " she smiled up at me. " You turned out pretty okay. "

" I like to think so. Everyone was so convinced they were going to screw me up, ruin me as a productive member of society. " I sighed. " I think they did a great job, better than some parents I've seen. "

" So you aren't going to try and talk me into living in the woods with nothing but a thin piece of nylon between me and nature ? "

I laughed. " Of course not. My parents are extreme. I think I could settle for a nice house somewhere."

" I can deal with that. " she nodded. " And maybe we can go camping on vacations. "

" I love you. " I said with a laugh as I kissed the top of her head.

" I love you, too. " she answered, leaning up and kissing me. She pulled back and looked at me quizzically. " What do you want to be when you grow up ? "

I laughed again. " I still have no idea. " I answered honestly. " How about you, have you thought about what you're going to do after you graduate ? "

" Well, I'm not sure. I honestly thought for a while about going into law. I mean, I'd have to take on a heavy class load until I graduate and probably still be there an extra year, but it was an idea that occurred to me. " She mused.

" Law, really ? " I asked, surprised. I had never seen Casey as the lawyer type.

" My other thought was maybe since I'm a political science major already, I could do something in politics. Like a campaign manager or maybe a speech writer. "

I laughed out. " Boy, you are really not going to endear yourself to my parents any time soon. "

She sat up quickly. " You think they won't like me if I go into law or politics ? " she looked stricken.

" Casey, I don't care if my parents like you or not. I Love you. That's all that matters to me. Besides, they already like you. Mom asks about you every time we talk and she knows we broke up. She just really likes you. They might not like what you do, but they already like who you are. " I assured her.

She settled back against me. " Still I'd hate for them to have reason to not like me. "

I leaned up and looked down at her. " You know I think maybe that is one of your biggest problems. You are way too concerned with whether everyone else is going to like you. The only person you need to worry about liking you is you. " I paused for a moment. " Well and me, but I love you no matter what. You can't base your career on whether or not my parents would approve of you. That's crazy. "

" I guess your right, " she answered as her fingers played against my chest. " It is kinda crazy. I just hate for anyone not to like me. "

" Get over it. You are always going to run into people that don't like you. You know the old saying, you can please some of the people all the time, but you can't please everyone all of the time. It just doesn't work like that. "

" I know. " she answered solemnly. Then she ran her finger down the center of my chest and looked up at me with a smile. " But I bet I can please you all the time. "

That was a fact I was certain of, but I was happy to let her prove it to me.

It was still snowing the next day. I couldn't believe how much snow had fallen on Chicago in the last week. From softly drifting flakes, to full on flurries, it hadn't really stopped since I arrived.

I was at home last Christmas, so I had never actually experienced a white Christmas before, not that it was really that big of a deal, but I couldn't help but think it made it seem that much more magical. I know it was stupid and juvenile, silly even. But I was in a silly mood It was evident from the goofy grin I couldn't keep off of my face.

Things with Casey had never been better. I had never before felt closer to her than I had in the last week, and aside from that little voice nagging in my brain telling me that it couldn't possibly last, I was happier than I had ever been in my life.

I felt a bit guilty for that really. I looked over at the passenger seat and saw Rusty's miserable face staring out the front windshield. I wanted to say something to make him feel better, but nothing came to mind. What could you say to someone in his situation ? What could possibly make him feel better ? I kept reassuring him, telling him I was sure that everything would be fine, that Jenn probably wasn't pregnant after all. I mean she was on the pill. And he pretended that my words helped for a moment, then it was right back to the worried, furrowed brow again. I hated that he was going through this while I sat there wanting to hum Christmas carols. So I hid my joyfulness as best I could, not wanting to depress him further.

He told me he was determined to marry Jenn if she was pregnant and they would both get jobs while still trying to get through school. I didn't see how it was going to work, especially given his class load, but I promised him that I would help as much as I could. Casey offered the same. Maybe between the two of us, we could help them at least until the baby was born. Then we already offered to pitch in with babysitting and class tutoring, anything they needed.

Rusty had hugged us both and pulled me aside to tell me he already felt like I was the big brother he never had. I was touched. I thought of him as my little brother, too. It was a Hallmark moment that I was sure I'd always remember.

I pulled into the only parking spot I could find at the overly crowded mall on the day before Christmas and we walked for a mile to get to the building. We were silent as we approached the building. Rusty no doubt lost in his thoughts of impending fatherhood and me lost in my thoughts about what I was going to get Casey for Christmas. Yes, I'm serious. I still hadn't gotten her anything and I still had no idea what I was going to get either.

My first instinct was jewelry. But then everyone got their significant others jewelry. I had gotten presents for everyone else on my list, a new apron for Mrs. Cartwright ( I noticed hers was a little tattered looking ) a new pipe for Mr. Cartwright, a bottle of twenty year old scotch for Joe. With all the new additions to my list, I had almost maxed out my credit card. But I still had enough left for something amazing for Casey. I just hadn't decided what the amazing thing would be.

She was one of the hardest people to buy for I'd ever met. Well, that wasn't really true. I knew she'd be happy with whatever I got her, but I wanted it to be special. I wanted it to say all the things I wanted to say to her, something to show her how much I loved her.

That was ridiculous, I know. No gift in the world could tell her that.

Then suddenly an idea occurred to me. It would take a lot of running all over the place, but I thought I could pull it off. I agreed to meet Rusty in the front of the mall in two hours and took off to gather my gift.

Back in the car, Rusty still wasn't speaking much. He had shown me a nice pair of earrings he got for Casey and a pendant for Jenn, but after that he was quiet again. I didn't mind that much, it gave me a chance to think about everything that had happened in the last week.

I couldn't believe the way everything had turned out. I was awestruck at the idea of Casey sitting at home wishing I would hurry and get home so we could pile into her bed and watch it's a Wonderful life and miracle of 34th street. She had made the plans the night before and as I injected my suggestion of Bad Santa to the movie watching list, she shot it down quickly. But I was okay with that. This was her night and I was willing to do whatever she wanted. Actually, I wouldn't admit it to any of my friends, but both of her suggestions were favorites of mine, so it suited me just fine.

I pulled into the drive and Rusty turned to me before getting out. " I'm really glad everything is working out with you and Casey. I was hoping it would when I invited you here. " he told me.

" But you thought she was going to be in Aspen, I thought. " I said, questioningly.

" Oh, I know. I did think she was going with Evan, but a little part of me really hoped that she would be here and you could work everything out away from school and everyone there. " he answered.

" Well, I can't tell you what it means to me that everything happened like it did. " I said, quietly. I always hated getting into mushy conversations particularly with other guys.

" You both seem happier than I've ever seen you. And since you are two of the most important people in my life, that makes me happy. " He smiled, the first smile I'd seen from him in the last two days.

" Russ, everything really is going to be fine with Jenn. We are going to figure everything out and make it all work. " I promised him once again. " You know I'll be there with you every step of the way. "

He nodded. " I know and I appreciate it. I don't know what I'd do without you and Casey. "

I patted his shoulder. " You won't ever have to find out, Man. Neither of us are going anywhere. "

" Have you and Casey talked about what's going to happen when we get back to school ? " he asked, a little out of the blue.

" What do you mean ? "

" I mean when her sisters start pushing at her again and Evan's there and Rebbecca. Are you still going to be okay with everything at school ? I'd hate to see everything fall apart when we get back. " he explained.

I thought about that before answering. It was a nagging concern that was always with me. But I took a deep breath and gave him a serious look. " I let Casey walk away from me last time. I let all the other people that influenced her have their way. " I told him. " I don't intend to make the same mistake again. I'll take on the entire Greek system before I let her go this time. "

" Let's hope it doesn't come to that. " he smiled.

" I hope not either, but you know those people. " I shrugged.

As soon as we opened the door I was pounced on. I laughed at the fact that she thought she was really fooling me. She had her arms around me, true enough, but her eyes were wandering to the bags in my hands and I pulled away from her quickly, jerking the bags from her view.

" You are terrible. " I scolded her as she pouted at me. " I can't believe you're acting like such a child. "

She stuck her tongue out at me and trotted up stairs without another word. At the top, she looked over her shoulder to make sure I was following her, which, of course, I was. Then she stomped her foot and went to her room, sticking out her tongue again, before disappearing inside.

I howled with laughter as I watched her. Then quickly deposited the bags in Rusty's closet, because we were both certain she would go snooping in my room later that night.

" You are an incorrigible little brat. " I announced as I entered her room, but the second the words were out of my mouth, I was silent again.

Darkness had already fallen outside, leaving the room lite by nothing more than the soft moonlight from the windows and a television screen set in the corner at the foot of the bed.

Casey was laying across the bed, a brilliant contrast to all the pink, in a scarlet red, Santa Claus type nightie. Her hair was pulled over her shoulder and she rested on one elbow, looking at me with a seductive grin that I was helpless to resist.

" I thought we were watching movies. " I told her as I moved slowly over to the bed.

" Who said we weren't ? " she asked innocently.

I raised my eyebrows at her. " You are going to make me lay here watching old black and white movies while you're laying there looking like that in full Technicolor ? "

She looked down at the nightgown and grinned, before slowly starting to move the straps off her shoulders. " I can always take it off, if you don't like it. But I know red is your favorite color and when I saw it in the store, I couldn't help but think of you. "

I kicked my shoes off into the corner and drew my shirt over my head before joining her on the bed and kissing her soundly.

Then she suddenly pulled away from me and settled on the other side of the bed, before starting the DVD.

" Hey, " I protested trying to pull her to me again. But she kept just out of grasp and smiled at me.

" I thought we were watching movies. " she said mischievously.

That was the way it went throughout both of the movies she had selected. She was a merciless tease, laying against me, running her hands over me, chewing on my earlobe. But the moment I touched her in return she retreated away from me quickly.

Then she really surprised me when she brought two additional DVD's she had stashed as a surprise.

Bad Santa and Scrooged. We watched both after she retrieved two pieces of the pie her mother had made especially for us while I was at the mall.

It was a wonderful night and after the last credit played on the last movie, she finally let herself fall into me and made up for all the teasing she had made me endure over the last several hours. It was well past midnight when we made it to sleep, falling exhaustedly into a crumpled heap in the middle of the bed.