It was seven-thirty when I opened my eyes again, or at least I think that's what the clock said. Everything was so blurry I couldn't really tell. I tried to draw in a breath that ended in a coughing spell and my nose was completely closed off.

Shit ! I was sick. Too much playing in the snow I guessed as I rolled over and found I wasn't alone in my darkened room. Casey was laying beside me, watching in intently.

I tried to force a smile but I think it came out as more of a grimace.

" You just had to go playing around outside, didn't you ? " She smiled down at me as she moved a strand of hair from my forehead. " You're burning up. "

I blinked my burning eyes and nodded. " I know. "

She reached over me to the table beside the bed and handed me a glass of water. Which I took gratefully and drained.

Then she left telling me she going to get medicine as she went.

I lay there staring at the ceiling feeling more miserable by the second. My head hurt, I couldn't breath, my eyes burned and I was so cold I couldn't get far enough under the blankets.

I never got sick. I couldn't remember the last time I even had a cold. Beaver and Wade always said it was because there was too much alcohol running through my systems, not even germs could live in that.

I realized in my state of near delirium that I really missed them. I missed the house and campus. As much as I loved being here with Casey's family I really was looking forward to getting back to my normal life and all the people that occupied it.

I heard the door open again and I looked up as Casey came back to bed and handed me a cup full of bright green liquid and another glass of water.

I took both. The taste of the green stuff was horrible and I chased it with the water as quickly as I could. I felt the bed shift as she climbed over me and I heard the soft clicking of the lamp being turned off.

Her arms came around me and I snugged back into her warmth grateful that she was there, just laying with me in the dark. I drifted off once again to the sound of her breathing lulling me along.

The next time I opened my eyes it was two-thirty in the morning. I glanced at the clock briefly before rolling towards the warm body behind me to find that there wasn't one. I squinted in the darkness thinking that perhaps she had simply moved away from me since I was so hot.

But the bed beside me was empty and I was instantly disappointed. I turned back to the room and looked around, trying to find her in the darkness before flipping on the lamp and determining she was indeed not in the room.

I rose rather stiffly and pulled the quilt around me to block out the shivers that were crawling over my skin. I was freezing, so cold my teeth were chattering.

I slipped from my room quietly and went across the hall. I still felt terrible. Actually I was pretty sure I felt worse than I had before and all I wanted was to find Casey and curl up beside her, wrapping myself in her warmth.

When I looked in her room and still didn't find her I went downstairs and poked my head first in the kitchen, then I went to the door of the living room.

I paused there in the doorway as Casey's voice came drifting to me. She was sitting on the love seat with her back to me. I felt a little guilty standing there eavesdropping like I was, but I couldn't help but wonder who she could be talking to at that hour.

" You just don't understand. " she was saying. " Things are different now. "

I considered for a moment going to her and letting her know I was there, but something made me hold back.

" No, you're wrong. This isn't like last time. I don't want you in my life anymore. " she continued and I was instantly more alert.

What did she mean this isn't like last time ? I knew she must be talking to Evan. But what had happened last time that was different now.

" I love him and I am where I want to be. " She went on after a short pause. " No, it was different then. I was confused and I didn't know what I wanted. " Another pause. " Yes, now I do. "

I tried to listen a little harder to see if I could hear what he was saying on the other end, but all I got was muffled and unintelligible. Fortunately I didn't need to hear what he was saying. She told me everything all on her own.

" Look, I feel horrible for what happened when Cappie and I were together last time. I'll never forgive myself for it, but you have to understand, this time is different. I don't want you calling me. I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to see you. Just stay away from me. "

She flipped the phone shut with a click and I moved from the doorway, pretending I was just coming down the stairs.

She turned to me and was by my side instantly. " What are you doing up ? You should be in bed. " she chided as she lead me back up the stairs, pausing for a moment to retrieve the puppy which had been on the seat beside her.

" I was looking for you. I woke up and you weren't there. " I explained quietly. My mind was still on the phone call and what I'd heard her saying.

All sorts of thoughts were going through my mind as she took me back to bed and pulled the blanket up around me. She forced more of the foul tasting medicine down me and settled the puppy into my side, before taking her spot, curled behind me.

I tried to stay awake. I wasn't sure I wanted to sleep at the moment. Too many crazy thoughts were running through my head for me to process with all the throbbing going on there but I tried my best. From what I heard it really sounded like Evan and Casey had been going out before she broke up with me. I shook the idea away, that couldn't possibly be what she was saying. Not after all the talking about how terrible cheating was the other day. Not after everything. She would have at least told me about it. She would have confessed to me if she had done something so horrible. Especially after I confessed to her.

I found it utterly impossible to keep my eyes opened and as they slid shut for the last time, I felt her tighten her grip around me and she whisper , " I love you, " in my ear.

The next two days drifted by in a blur of whatever medicine she was constantly feeding me, a persistent fever that wasn't going up any, but wasn't going away either and terrible thoughts flitting in and out of my mind. I wanted to ask her about the phone call, but I felt guilty for listening in to her conversation. I tried to figure out someway to bring it up without telling on myself, but my head hurt to bad to make any progress. Besides, I'd lost my voice as well, so all I would really be able to do was squeak at her anyway. That is not how I wanted to have that conversation.

Fang, the puppy, so named for his vicious nature and sharp teeth, was beside me constantly. He had instantly accepted that I was his human and he seemed perfectly content with the prospect. I promised him repeatedly that we would have plenty of fun as soon as I was feeling better. His little face looked at me like he understood and he would immediately go back to chewing on my hand or trying his best to lick me in the face.

Rusty darted in and out, hanging around for awhile before tearing off again. At this point he was with Jenn fairly regularly. She came by almost everyday. The pregnancy scare had only proven to draw them closer together. I was happy to see him so happy, or I would have been if I hadn't felt so miserable.

By the end of the week, I was beginning to feel a little better. The chest cold part of my cold was lingering still and I was plagued by deep, barking coughing fits just about every time I tried to take a deep breath, but the head cold part seemed to be easing. My throat was no longer sore. The fever had finally broken and my sense of smell had returned.

This was all good news indeed since New Year's Eve was only two days away and we were heading back to school before the festivities.

After a long tearful goodbye between all the Cartwrights and even a few tears for me especially from Ethan, we started on the long journey back to school.

Rusty and Fang were occupying the backseat. I let Casey drive, since I still wasn't feeling great and the medicine she had been giving me, I found out was Nyquil, was still making me a little groggy. I had no idea that medicine that strong could be bought over the counter, but whatever was in it, it dropped me like a shot almost the moment I took it.

I still couldn't get the phone call out of my mind, but I couldn't very well bring it up with Rusty sitting in the backseat listening in. Well I could have but it didn't feel right. So I waited.

I felt almost like I was living on borrowed moments. The closer and closer we got to school the more I felt like she was going to be gone as soon as we arrived. I had no idea why I was feeling that way. She sat in the driver's seat of my jeep proudly wearing my lavaliere. The ring I had given her was on display, worn upside to indicate that she was taken. She was even at the moment clad in an old Kappa Tau shirt of mine. She certainly wasn't hiding me from her friends.

That was one of the things I had been most worried about. I didn't think she would drop me the second we got back to campus, but I was a little concerned that she might choose to not be completely honest with her sisters about where her heart was. It would be just like Casey to pretend instead of facing the confrontation I was sure would come eventually.

So I was a little surprised when we finally arrived at the Zeta Beta house and she pulled my jeep up front and got out without a second thought, still wearing my shirt, still wearing the ring and still wearing the necklace. The other thing she was wearing was a look that said she could care less what everyone inside thought.

Rusty and I helped her get her bags into the house and before I could leave she grabbed me, right in the foyer of the ZBZ house and kissed me.

It wasn't a simple kiss, it wasn't a chaste kiss. It was a throughly sound kiss. The kind of kiss that makes those around you a little uncomfortable, or envious. I wasn't sure which one she was going for but really I suspected it was the latter.

Rusty and I left her, after she promised to call me as soon as she got unpacked, with several of her sisters standing around watching us leave. As I made it out the door, from the corner of my eye, I caught Rebbecca smiling at me like she knew a secret no one else did.

Boy would she be surprised when she tried to cause trouble this time.

I was almost laughing at just the thought of it by the time I got back to the jeep.

Beaver and Wade attacked us as soon as well exited the jeep. Beaver, pulling me into a hug that caused my feet to leave the ground. He always was the overly emotional sort. There was much black slapping and welcome homes.

A small party was already starting up in the living room. The moment I entered, with Fang tucked under my arm, a Tri Pi girls that I had previously spent a little time with, I think their names were Tiffany and Brittany, grabbed me and pulled me inside the crowded room with the party.

" We have missed you. " One of them said, with her tongue practically in my ear.

I didn't have a chance to answer before the other one was sliding her hand over my chest and burying her face in my neck.

" We've been waiting for you since yesterday. It was so cold and lonely last night. " She said before kissing me.

I pulled back from them trying to escape their grasp, when Bev came to my rescue, shooing the girls from me.

" Let him breath, Ladies. He just got here. " he told them, drawing me away from them and up the stairs. " So your folks got you a dog, huh ? "

I looked down at Fang and smiled. " No, Casey did. "

He stopped me with a hand on my shoulder. " Dude ! " was all he said, but I understood. We wanted the whole story.

And I told him most of it as we went into my room and made a bed for the puppy.

" So, you are really back with her ? This isn't going to be like last time, is it ? " he asked. " I don't' think I can take all the cleaning again. "

I assured him that nothing like that was going to happen, but I couldn't help but remember the phone call. Her words to Evan still played over and over in my brain. I hadn't really been able to stop thinking about it really.

The ten hour road trip hadn't helped much either. I had drifted in and out of dreams of Casey talking to Evan on the phone, telling him how much she loved him and wanted him back. Telling him that I didn't have to know what was going on, it would be there secret.

I know it was stupid. Of course I know. She would never do anything like that to me. I was certain that I had misunderstood the entire thing. Taken her words out of context.

I feel horrible for what happened when Cappie and I were together last time. I'll never forgive myself for it, but you have to understand, this time is different.

No matter how many times the words replayed I just couldn't find a way to make them sound innocent. I was going to have to talk to her. I needed to know what happened last time. I needed to hear it from her. I wasn't sure what I would do if I found out that she had started dating Evan before she broke up with me.

Beaver looked at me for a long moment. " You seem different. " he told me. " I'm not sure why, but something is definitely different. " Then his eyes widened and he gave me a huge smile. " Oh, my God, your letters, Bro. Where the hell are is your lavaliere ? "

" Casey has it. " I answered, with a smile of my own. " She kinda took from me. "

" Casey took what ? " Wade asked as he entered the room.

" His letters, Man. Casey Cartwright has his lavaliere. " Beaver told him.

" No, " Wade groaned. " Does she really ? "

" Hey, what the hell is that suppose to mean ? " I demanded.

Wade clasped my shoulder and lead me to the bed where he sat next to me. " Dude, I love you like a brother. " I nodded. " Well, it's just that this girl has messed you up so badly already. I'd hate to see you start with the cleaning and the moping again. "

I stood and put my hands on my hips. " There is not going to be any cleaning or moping. I swear. We aren't going to break up again. "

They both eyed me doubtfully but seemed to accept that they weren't going to change my mind.

We went back downstairs to join the party. I had a hell of a time keeping Tiffany and Brittany off of me, before I spotted a couple of single guys and pawned them off on them.

Wade found me not long after and informed me that there was someone at the door to see either me or Rusty. And they couldn't find him anywhere.

I suspected he was off somewhere with Jenn who I knew was returning today as well. So I went to see who it was.

Hannah stood in the doorway of the Kappa Tau house. Her red hair was swept up in a high ponytail. She wore a pair of painted on black jeans and a white sweater that dipped low, showing off her ample cleavage. She certainly didn't look like a science geek to me.

She gave me a huge smile as I approached her.

" I was hoping you had made it back by now. " she said coming to me and wrapping her arms around my neck.

I wasn't expecting her to hug me and I almost stumbled in surprise. " We just made it back this afternoon. When did you get here ? "

" Day before yesterday. I wanted to get settled before everyone started coming back. " she informed me as I lead her towards the living room.

But she stopped me. " Can I talk to you somewhere a little more private ? "

I nodded and lead her upstairs to my room.

She was silent until I closed the door behind me.

" I wasn't sure whether I should say anything or not. " she began, taking a seat on my bed. " It's just that, I went to see Casey before coming here. I wasn't sure about just showing up here by myself, so I was hoping I could talk her into coming along. " she shrugged. " Anyway, she wasn't alone when I went up to her room. There was a guy in there with her. "

I blinked. " There was a guy in her room at the ZBZ house. "

Men were generally not allowed upstairs at the Sorority house so I was a bit surprised.

" I don't think anyone else knew he was there. Her balcony door was opened. "

So some guy had climbed the trellis and gotten into her room through the balcony. Now I really was interested.

" What did he look like ? " I knew it had to be Evan before I even asked. But I wanted to be sure.

" Tall, pretty, blond. " Yep, Evan.

I grabbed my cellphone and punched her number in quickly. It only rang once before she answered.

" What's up ? " she asked, cheerfully. " I was just about to call you. "

" Yeah, well, I guess I beat you to it. What are you doing ? "

" I just finished unpacking and finishing off some business I needed to take care of. " she answered, casually. " How is Fang ? Is he settling in okay ? "

I glanced to Hannah's leg, where Fang was scrambling to try to climb. " Yep, he's fine. Why don't you come on over ? There's a party starting up downstairs and Hannah is here. "

She paused for a moment before answering. " I just have a few more things to take care of and I'll be right there. Give me half an hour. "

I agreed and hung up with a quick " I love you. "

Hannah was looking at me expectantly. " She'll be here in a little while. "

" You didn't mention the guy ? " she made it sound like a question.

" No, I thought I'd try to be a little more subtle. Why don't we go downstairs and I'll introduce you around. " I suggested.

We went down and Wade was the first person I ran into. I explained to him that Hannah was a special friend of mine and I wanted him to look out for her, introduce her to everyone. Then I left her in his capable hands.

The trek down Greek row didn't' take as long as I thought it would, probably because I was running. My house was in the middle, hers was the last one. I considered that I probably should have driven since I was so anxious to get there, but the jeep was at the house and I was half way to hers before the thought occurred to me.

I felt like an idiot as I scaled the trellis under her window. Evan could came out at any moment and catch me spying on them like some kind of demented peeping Tom. But it was the only way I was going to know for sure what was going on it that room. The only way I could put my mind to ease.

I climbed over the balcony rail and molded my body to the wall as best as I could, staying to the shadows.

What I saw inside as I peered around the door did nothing to ease my mind. Evan was there alright, talking to Casey animatedly about their break up.

" I'm sorry. You have to believe me. I made a mistake. " he was saying as I leaned closer to hear better.

Casey turned away from him and I was her shoulders shake. " I'm sorry, Evan. It's too late for that. "

He stared down at her, towering over her shoulder. " You know you will never be able to hold on to this presidency without me at your side. The only reason they wanted you here in the first place was that I came with the package. " he told her. His voice was low and a little threatening. I was suddenly very glad I was there.

" I don't you to keep the presidency. " she insisted.

" Of course you do. How far do you think its going to go with national when they find out the kind of guy you've decided to hook up with. Do you really think there image of the perfect ZBZ has a Kappa Tau lavaliere hanging from her neck. I'm betting they would much rather that be my letters. "

She stepped away from him and I jumped back as she turned towards the door. " Don't you think I know all that. The representative from national has already called me twice this afternoon. Apparently someone in the house called her and told her all about Cappie. "

He put his hands on her shoulders and pulled her into him. " That is exactly why you have to break this off. I know what this means to you. Are you so certain you want to through it all away over him ? "

She didn't say anything. My chest tightened as the silence continued to grow between them. She wasn't arguing with him. She wasn't protesting.

She was in fact crying on his shoulder. Crying because by choosing me, she had thrown everything else in her life away.

I climbed down from the balcony feeling stupid and selfish and ashamed.

Then with my eyes on the ground on front of me I headed back home, trying to figure out what I was going to do now.