February 8, 2138 (Early evening)
As time came closer to ending the day, I started dwelling on our problems more and more. All of the things that needed to be done and how we didn't know how we could make all of them happen. I still couldn't come up with any answers that were foolproof, so I decided that I needed to make sure that nothing else could go wrong to add to our problems. If one unexpected thing went wrong, all of our plans could be destroyed. The biggest one that I could see going wrong was Rachel. I had to know that she wouldn't betray us in the middle of it all. And losing one person was less important than allowing that to happen. I felt that I had said what I had to say to Tommy. He knew that I loved him, and I knew that he loved me. If something happened to me, at least he would know that he made me happy. So it was time to give Rachel her freedom to choose what she really wanted.
I waited until the others were gathering to eat in the lounge to make my move. That way there would only be me that was supposed to be making rounds down the trail and by the front gate and one person in the tree stand. They would be looking towards the city, not necessarily back at me and the gate. I had to do it on my own and couldn't involve the others because she might see it as a trap. Rachel always went back to her building with the cages without having to be escorted to do it anymore, and she was making her way to the lounge to eat with Karl as I yelled to Karl before he reached the lounge.
"Can I have a word with her for a minute," I asked.
"Can't it wait? The food's hot and it actually smells good for once," Karl replied.
"It'll just be a minute," I replied as though there was nothing more to it than that.
"All right. But the sooner I get done the sooner you eat," Karl said as he turned and allowed Rachel to walk to me at the closed gate.
In her typical fashion Rachel walked up in silence and just looked at me with a questioning look on her face. I looked back at her, but then past her to see that Karl had made it inside to eat. He paused at the door and looked back at us for a second when Tommy peaked around the upper part of the tree he was in from the tree stand and said, "If you guys don't hurry up and eat you're going to have to bring a plate of that out here to me. Come on, Dad."
"All right, son. Give me a few," Karl replied and walked inside.
Tommy turned back around and a dull explosion could be heard coming from the city before I could start talking to Rachel. It was a sharp reminder of what was going on and made me scared of what I was about to do. Nonetheless, I swallowed my fear and went on with what I had set out to do.
"What do you want," Rachel asked me.
"I need you to just listen to me. There isn't much time for this. Look, it's just you and me here. And I'm feeling really lucky today. So lucky that I thought I would spread some of the good feeling around," I said as Rachel kept looking at me in confusion. I pulled the door open enough for her to fit through it if she wanted to, and pulled out my laser pistol and handed it to her.
"What are you doing, Amber," Rachel asked as her left eye started getting brighter and she started looking all around us.
"I'm not trying to trick you or trap you in any way. I'm giving you a choice. All that I ask is that you don't hurt anyone here. I love these people. They're my family and they're all that I have. I know that you've felt what love is inside of you before. Maybe the people that you loved didn't care or didn't give it back to you, but these people do to me. And it fills every part of me. Someday I hope that you can have that, too. I want you to be able to feel things and not be ashamed of it. It's what makes us who we are, and it doesn't always have to hurt you. Dad and Karl have always been there for us. Having a sister to share all of my life with has been wonderful. Tad is like a younger brother that I've never had, and Tommy makes me happier than I've ever been. Even with all of this war and destruction all around us. Do you remember back before, when you first felt like that someone special was standing right in front of you? Mine is right there in that tree, and he loves me. Someday you will have that, too. If you let yourself and really want it. And regardless of everything, you're my friend and I care about what happens to you. But I never know what it is that you want and life isn't all about me and what I want from you. It's about what you want, too. If you want to be free, you can leave. If you want to go back where you came from, you can do that, too. You can take this gun and run and do either one, or you can turn it on me and try to take me back to the machines with you. And you can always wonder if they appreciated you for being Rachel or for getting results. Or you can stay here and work for it, and these people will learn to care about you like I do. All that I ask is that you don't betray them or hurt any of them. I'll leave with you if you want to take me, but not if you choose to hurt my family. Or you can stay and be one of us. You need to choose, and you need to do it now. Before the others see us," I said and handed the laser to Rachel.
Rachel stopped looking around and looked directly at me as her left eye dimmed back to it's usual yellow color again. She could have taken the gun and I would have let her do it without resisting, but she stood before me at the gate and began to speak.
"I don't think that your friends and family will ever look at me as more than just another tool to be used around here. Only a couple of you will even look at me directly for more than a minute. And deep down inside, you're still afraid of me. Afraid that I'll hurt that little boy that you have. Like I didn't want that myself years ago. Afraid that I'll take Tommy away from you, like I didn't want to have a guy that loved me before like you have. And the ironic thing about it all is that now that you want to know if you can trust me for good, I need to know if I can trust you," Rachel said.
"What do you mean? Of course you can trust me," I replied.
"Can I? Because I don't know if you're going to agree with me if you hear what I have to say," Rachel said.
"What is it? Hurry up," I said.
"I'll stay here and help you. I told you before that I didn't want to hurt anyone anymore. But I want something in return from you and the rest of them," Rachel said.
"I'm offering you your freedom. What else can you want," I asked.
"I want all of you to agree to not hurt Cadet Brett again," Rachel answered.
"Who are you talking about," I asked.
"The guy in the mall that you shot. None of you can hurt him again," Rachel replied.
"I never wanted to hurt him in the first place, Rachel. I swear, but he kept shooting at us. It was the only way that I could stop him from killing one of us, I said.
"I know that. I know that you did what you felt that you had to do. But when I saw him fall out into the hallway, it hurt me inside. I wanted to go to him and help him. The way that he's always tried to help and protect me. He's guided me through so many things and kept me safe. But I couldn't help him when he needed me, and it hurt. Hearing him in pain and knowing that he needs you. Is that what you feel when one of these people are hurt. Do you feel the pain, too," Rachel asked.
"Yes. I'm sorry that I hurt him, and I'm sorry that I hurt you by doing it. He just wouldn't stop," I replied.
"Promise me that none of you will hurt him again and I'll help you," Rachel said.
"I won't hurt him again if I don't have to," I said.
"That's not good enough. None of you will raise another weapon at him again or I'm through helping you," Rachel replied.
"I can't let him shoot one of us, Rachel," I said as she interrupted me.
"I'll deal with him myself. I won't let him hurt any of you. I just want your word that you'll let me deal with him myself if we ever encounter him again. Please. That's all that I want from you," Rachel said.
"All right. I won't hurt him if we see him. And I'll try to convince the others not to as well. But that's all that I can offer you. I'll try to stop them from hurting him, but I can't promise for them to not defend themselves against him if he tries to hurt them again," I said.
"He can be saved. He hides it, but I've seen how he looks at me. We always hid any feelings and tried to purge them away like we were supposed to. But I couldn't ever get mine to stay gone forever. And I could see his eyes widen a little more than normal if he saw me by myself, where he would act casual and calm around everyone else," Rachel said.
"Why didn't you tell us before about this? Why didn't you tell me at least," I said.
"Why? Because it wouldn't have mattered to any of you. But now that you need me more than before, all of a sudden it's important. So, do we have an agreement or not," Rachel said in a plain tone of voice.
"It would have mattered. To me. I could have helped you deal with it," I said.
"You could have used it against me. You could have taunted me with the idea that all of you would go out of your way to hurt him. You could have used the idea of saving him from the machines to enlist my aid in helping you long before now. How would that have ever gotten any of you to trust me? If you felt like I was being forced to do everything that I was doing because of what might happen if I didn't," Rachel asked.
"Well, I must trust you now. Otherwise, why would I be handing a gun to you and opening the gate for you to leave if you wanted to? And offering myself up to you," I asked.
"To save them from me. To keep Tommy safe," Rachel answered.
"I could do that by killing you right now. For someone that shuns emotional attachments, you sure act like you understand them really well. I could have gotten rid of you a long time ago. I could have allowed you to be gotten rid of. Tommy could have stepped aside when Tad was holding a gun on you and let him put an end to you, and they would all be safe from you ever betraying them. If you understand feelings and emotions so well and you understand my motives so well, why are you still standing here? Why are we having this conversation when I could keep my family safe from you by eliminating you like a machine would," I asked.
"Maybe you should," Rachel replied.
"Maybe I will, if you do anything to hurt my family. Then again, maybe you can go in there and get us a couple of plates of whatever that is that Carrie made for us and we can eat it together out here. Like a couple of friends should. Sharing dinner and caring about the problems that the other one has to talk about," I said.
Rachel looked at me for a moment longer, but her stare was interrupted by Tommy peaking around from the tree again and saying, "Hey. Are you two all right over there?"
Rachel spoke up before I could, saying, "Yeah. We're fine. Do you want some of that dinner that's cooking up in there?"
"If you're offering, sure. Please and thank you," Tommy replied to Rachel's offer.