Breaking Dawn

AN: Hey guys. I just wanted to make a special thanks to Closet Writer, I don't know who you are but I am so grateful for your review. It makes me feel really happy that I can get to someone with my writing. My confidence is usually pretty low, but you really have brought it up. Thank you, and thanks to everyone else. Do you guys think Robert Pattinson is good to play Edward in the movie? Yeah I know that was random but I just wanted some opinions….

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Chapter 8

My palms were sweaty, my heart pounding and I felt nauseous. Edward was driving manically, as per usual, but for once this was not the cause of my distress. We drove in silence, tension thick in the air.

I had thought it was impossible for him to become even whiter, but I was proven wrong. His knuckles were a sickly white color; I was surprised the wheel hadn't broken his grip was so tight.

I felt the biggest impulse to reach over and touch him, calm him, reassure him. But I couldn't bring my hand to move. The words of comfort caught in my throat, or maybe I couldn't say those words, they were gone. There was no thought of comfort or bravery in how I felt right now. I couldn't bring myself to say them.

Edwards's eyes, which had been black, were now butterscotch, but the cold hard empty look had remained. His eyes were anxious and wary, darting across the long road stretched out in front of us. The sun was setting behind us, sending pink splatters across the perfect sky. It started to then grow dark.

I sighed, my voice caught in my throat.

"I just can't believe… that within this week… you heart will stop beating," Edward growled, breaking the silence.

"Edward. You promised."

"I know… but you just don't understand!" he said loudly, his voice full of anger.

I froze, his fierce eyes piercing me, and I was suddenly more afraid of him than I had ever been. A small tear rolled down my cheek.

"Edward. You are so beautiful…so true and pure. How can there not be more for you? I just know it. I can sense it; I know that you have a soul. And your not damning mine to hell. It will always be yours. Edward, this is extremely unfair. I gave you what you wanted… now please… give me what you know I want so badly," I pleaded. His eyes softened. He lifted his cold finger to my cheek and brushed the tear away and sighed.

"Bella… you look so scared. You are scared. I can tell," he smiled slightly as my heart gave a little jump, "And I don't think your ready. I don't think you understand."

"Edward, I'm as ready as I'll ever be. I am so ready for this. And I may be scared, but I'll be all right. I love you, I trust you."

Edward sighed again, this time in defeat. I knew I had won. But there was no way he was going talk me out of this in the first place. Especially after I'd given him everything of mine, how could he take it all and not give me something back?

No, I suppose he had given me something; I smiled as I remember last night. But that was a physical thing, and I cared so much more about being with him. I wanted to be with Edward forever. I reached over and grabbed Edward's tense hand. I curled my small fingers into a ball and sat them in his palm. He curled his around mine, like a protective case.

"I'm sorry Bella. I love you. I know what this means to you, and I promised. And I will not break it. We will be together for eternity. And there's nothing you can do about it."

"Nothing I can do about it? What if I… cheated on you with Emmett?" I teased, trying to keep my voice light, my heart was still pounding fast, and I was still terrified of the destiny that was waiting for me when we got home, but a little light humor couldn't hurt anyone. Thankfully Edward laughed, but then he took a moment to think about what I had said and made a disgusted face.

I laughed at him, and he squeezed my fingers. He smiled at me, slowly lifting the corners of his mouth, his eyes lit up just slightly and he inhaled deeply and closed his eyes for a moment, thinking, still smiling and he seemed to go to a far away place just at that moment.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked. I stared deep into his butterscotch eyes. A huge wave of sudden sadness came over him and I, and I almost felt my heart tear in two. It was devastating, the sadness in his eyes, so intense. It was torturing.

"I know this will probably make you upset, but I was just imagining a life where I was human…and we were sitting on the porch of a big white house in the country. We were both sitting on a withered old bench, and we were both old and gray and away from any harm, sitting in the sun. Talking and just being human, and enjoying the sun and warmth."

Edward smiled again at me, sadly and I returned his saddened look.

"Edward that will be us one day. We may not be old, but we will have a house, somewhere safe from everyone, somewhere far away where we can sit outside and not have to worry. A place where we will be safe to be ourselves, one day I promise."

Edward's eyes twinkled as he imagined such a thing, it was a beautiful dream. Suddenly the car swerved and we were going up the long drive way towards the Cullen's house. Oh no. It was back.

My palms grew sweaty, my breathing uneven and heavy. I could hear my heart pumping in my ears; my stomach feeling like it was going to drop out my arse. Edward reached over and undid my seatbelt; I was frozen to the seat, I couldn't move.

He pulled me into a tight hug and rubbed my back reassuringly. "Everything is going to be all right," he whispered to me. I nodded. I slowly opened my door and stood up, my knee's shaking.

The weather was quite pleasant, warm yet overcast, though I was shivering violently. I stopped for a few moments. Caught my breath and steadied my self. Breathing in and out.

It was hard to imagine that these were some of my last real breaths. I tried to calm down. I had to brave. I had to think of Edward. This was what I wanted. I felt stronger now and I was no longer shivering.

I walked purposefully and strongly towards Edward who extended his arm to me and I took it. He led me onto the porch, in front of the large elegant wooden door. He turned to me and crushed his lips into mine.

The kiss was fierce, urgent, like those he had done all those times he thought he was saying goodbye to me for the last time. But the kiss soon slowed and become tender.

I could taste his emotion; I tasted his fear for me and the guilt he felt. I kissed softly in return, and he was calm. He finally let me go both of us gasping for air.

We turned as Alice opened the door. She grinned at me. I ran to hug her. I only just realized how much I missed her, even though it had only been a day, and I surprisingly found myself grateful for all the work on my wedding she had done.

I hugged her as tightly as I could, but after a while I began to feel sore so I released her.

"Jesus Bella, you really take the breath out of me," Alice laughed. I let out a nervous croak, which was supposed to be a laugh. She laughed again at me and rubbed my arm.

"I missed you Bells! Thanks again for letting me do your wedding, I only get a chance to do that… well…. never!" she smiled her angel's smile and her beautiful eyes were calm.

"Well Alice… despite my doubts at the beginning, I'm glad I let you do it."

Alice laughed. Emmett suddenly pushed past Alice and scooped me into a huge bear hug, which reminded me a lot of Jacob's hugs, though instead of the gorgeous warmth that would usually spread through me as I met his touch, instead it felt like I had collided with a huge cold stone boulder.

He let me go after a few moments and we stepped away, me gasping for air and Emmett grinning widely. Emmett then gave Edward a secret wink and Edward gave Emmett a glare, but then laughed.

Emmett then thrust his fist out and collided it with Edward's.

"Oh grow up you too!" said Alice hitting Emmett on the back of the head.

Edward looked slightly guilty; I made a note to ask him about this later.

"You just wait Emmett, just one week and I'll be stronger than you," I said defiantly.

Emmett laughed, "Oh I look forward to the challenge."

Alice rolled her eyes and Edward laughed. We all then retreated down the dimly lit hallway. We proceeded into the living room and sat down at the dining table. Esme, Carlisle, Rosalie and Jasper entered then, sitting around me.

Jasper smiled at me and suddenly I felt, calm yet brave and confident. He winked at me and I smiled in thanks, knowing the feelings weren't genuine, but I didn't care. Rosalie gave me a small smile then looked away, still obviously upset with her family's decision.

Esme glided gracefully towards me and gave me a small hug. She kissed my forehead.

"Welcome home Bella, I've missed you."

I smiled and nodded. I had missed Esme as well. She had become a sort of second mother to me. She was my family and I loved her.

Carlisle smiled warmly at me and shook my hand, then sat beside me.

"So you and Bella have fun, ey Edward?" grinned Jasper. Emmett burst out into a huge laugh and Edward glared at them then cast me a guilty look but rolled his eyes.

I laughed with them, so did Alice. Esme and Carlisle rolled their eyes but I saw the corners of their mouths rise slightly. Rosalie sat in her chair, staring at the center of the table, frozen like a statue; she was clearly not in a humorous mood.

"Welcome home Bella. Now, I understand you have not seen Charlie yet?" Carlisle smiled warmly at me; I liked the sound of that, 'Welcome Home'. I warm feeling of gratitude and pride coursed through me. I was just so grateful that I had been accepted into this family. I shook my head.

"Now here is what I think we should do. Bella you will go home, tell Charlie you are going the University of Alaska, and you have paid the fees and you will be staying in a dorm there, you will have as many days as you wish to say goodbye and pack. You may also wish to go see your mother.

We will then take your things and take you Tanya's family, we will stay there for one year or until you have started to issue some self control and your strength dies down. You and Edward will then enroll into the university, and take your place there as normal students, and then, you may continue your lives as you wish."

I nodded. It was the perfect plan, well almost perfect. After college, during college even, Charlie and Renee would still want to see me. Want me to visit them, I couldn't bear to ignore them all my life.

Carlisle seemed to understand what I was thinking, "I am sorry Bella, but we are unfortunately not allowed to tell them of what you are, what we are. It is against our law and you will put them in danger by doing so. You will able to visit them during your 20's, you can pass off as mid 20's, but from then onwards, we are going to have to be very careful in keeping the secret…and that may mean keeping away from your parents."

I nodded. I knew there were sacrifices that had to be made. I sighed; Charlie, Renee, Jacob and all my friends unfortunately would have to be part of that sacrifice. But I took great comfort in Edward. He was all I wanted, and I wanted him forever.

"Well, it's getting a bit late, and Charlie will be wondering where Bella is, I will take her home now," said Edward, he sounded tired, not that that was possible, but he seemed worn out, I couldn't explain it.

I nodded. I said my goodbyes and stepped outside. The sky was pitch black and there were no stars as the sky was overcast. Edward opened the door for me and we drove back in silence.

When we reached the house, I leaned over and kissed him lightly on the lips.

"I'm sorry Bella, I hope you don't mind if I don't come over tonight, I think we both need some thinking time," he said guiltily.

I nodded, I sincerely agreed, it seemed like a very long time ago that I had had a moment of peace, a moment to myself, just me and my thoughts.

I kiss him again. "See you tomorrow okay?" I asked hopefully. He nodded and smiled. I stepped out of the car and stood in the driveway, staying there until he had completely disappeared from view.

I sighed, and then turned to slowly walk into the house.

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AN: Thanks again for the review Closet Writer, and also thanks to everyone else. I also just wanted to say that I owe a lot of my writing to music, music is what pulled me out of writers block, but especially the band Yellowcard, I have been listening to them through writing this entire chapter, and they really help me to get my creative juices flowing. So thanks everyone, hope you enjoyed. Please review, and I'll keep writing. I was meant to go looking for a job today (I really want a job in a book store), but instead I stayed home writing, though I enjoyed it.