A/n hey all, thanks for your kind reviews. Here is the next chapter.

Disclaimer: see the first chapter

Hours passed at glacial speed while I paced the small apartment and wished that everything was different. My legs still felt like they were made out of lead and soon I was back on the bed.

Someone had left a suitcase just inside the door of the bedroom and I had found some of my things from my "apartment," in the bag. I fished through it and found pajamas and my bunnies slippers. My arms were aching when I pulled the white tee shirt over my head and then the blue plaid pajama bottoms. My brush was in the bag so I sat down to comb out my hair, but after a few strokes my arms gave out and I lay back on the messy bed.

The ghost of Spencer's scent mingled with the smell of sex made me want to cry again. I prayed that this team of Spencer's would find the way out of this mess for us. I couldn't bear to lose him. My eyes were getting heavy again and I thought maybe a nap might be a great idea.

--

Someone was shaking my shoulder and I tried to punch and hit and kick out, but the person didn't go away. Kind arms wrapped around me and held onto me. A familiar scent washed over me and drowned out the smell of sweat and sour odor from my uncle.

"Amy… its okay honey… Wake up baby…"

"Spencer…."

"I'm here… Hold onto me…"

I was trying to breathe, but my lungs felt like they were on fire. "I… Spencer… I'm okay… It was just a bad dream." He let go of me and sat with an arm around my shoulders till I could breathe again. "I'm sorry… Its bad enough you have to deal with the agency, now you have to see my meltdown.

"It's okay baby… I just want to help you."

"You can't change what happened to me." I got up and yanked off my pajama bottoms.

"I know that… I can't change that fact that you were physically and sexually abused. I only wish you could have trusted me and told me everything."

"Oh yeah… that would have been a fun conversation with someone you just met."

"I told you everything about what happened to me in Georgia and about my mother. You didn't run away."

"That's because I had a job to do. I couldn't run away." I retorted, pulling on my bra and tee shirt.

"Can you be serious for just one minute?"

"I'm always serious."

He grabbed me and hugged me so tight I thought my ribs might break. "Let me go…"

"No… we have a big problem and you're running away. I love you Amy Ryan and I'm not going to just let you get yourself killed."

He let go of me and I finished dressing. It was silent in the room. I was trying to find something, anything to say, but I couldn't bring anything out of my head that wouldn't piss Spencer off.

"Amy… Are you going to ignore me forever?"

"No… you just throw out that you know all there is to know about me and you expect me to just respond and not be a little freaked out.

"No… I'm trying to tell you that I understand. I was given a file on you as soon as we knew you were coming after me. I know all about you, at least what the agency left intact about you. You filled in the rest, except for the part about the abuse. I figured that out on my own. Before you get mad, you should realize that I also lived with a mentally unstable parent and I was abused too. It wasn't sexual, but my mother almost killed me four times before I had her committed. I was also beat up by kids I went to school with."

"Spencer… I'm sorry… I didn't know."

"I don't want you to feel sorry for me. Physical and emotional pain was a way of life for me for a long time. I'm a great actor. I have to be."

Suddenly I wanted to laugh. I put my jeans on and turned around to face my new lover. "I think you deserve an Academy award baby."

He grinned and we both laughed. "Yeah… I guess I do."

He put his arms around me again, this time the embrace was gentle. "I don't want to act anymore and I don't want you to act either."

I nodded my head against his chest and he pushed me back to look in my eyes. "Come on… the team is waiting. Hotch and Garcia needs to speak to you. There are a few theories I have about this situation with us. I need more facts from you."

"Yes sir, Dr. Reid…." I saluted him and he snorted.

"Come on Ms. Ryan." He held out a hand to me and we left the apartment.

--

When we got to the offices of the BAU, I was shocked to see a blond woman stalk out of an office followed by Hotch, who headed into another office down the hall. She didn't look happy and he was glowering so much that I wanted to hide behind Spencer. He looked over at me and shook his head.

"I'll tell you about it later."

I shrugged and followed him into another office. Hotch greeted us and I was introduced to Penelope Garcia. She looked even more formidable in person. She didn't look happy to see me and I didn't blame her.

"Garcia… this is Agent Amy Ryan."

"I assume you can't produce valid identification." She said flatly. "Hotch… why is she here? Why are we protecting her?"

"Garcia…"

"It's okay Agent Hotchner." I turned my attention to Garcia. "I know you care about Reid. You have every right to be upset with me. I'm sorry."

"Sorry isn't good enough. I don't see why -"

"Garcia… We have been over this." Hotch reminded her. "Let's get this over with."

"Fine…" She swung around in her chair and began to tap away on her computer. "So Agent Ryan… What's your real name?"

--

"What do you mean you lost her?" Stanford yelled into the phone.

"Sir… I was watching the bitch and listening. She brought Dr. Reid back to her apartment. They talked and she told him all about her assignment. She tried to block me with a radio, but you know the range and filters on the new system are much better than what we've had in the past. It was nauseating to listen to her beg him to forgive her for her deception."

Stanford's hand curled into a fist at his side and his face grew hot with rage. "She's betrayed us all and must be made to pay."

"Yes… What do I do?" Crawford asked. He had some ideas on the kind of punishment the little bitch should endure, but Stanford wouldn't want to hear it.

"I'll get back to you. I have to think about this and decide what the best course of action is."

"Are you going to call the Director?"

"Don't ask questions Crawford. You will be contacted with further instructions."

Stanford hung up the phone and bit the inside of his mouth to keep from screaming out his frustration. The little bitch had betrayed them all! The Director wasn't going to be happy.

He started to smile. Yes… the Director wasn't going to be happy with that piece of information at all. He was going to be very happy to let the old man know what his favorite had done to betray the work of the agency.

Finally the old man would have to accept that his dear, precious little Amy was beyond his reach forever. He would have to order her death and Stanford would take pleasure in forwarding that order. If only he could go to Virginia and carry it out himself. He would make her pay for her betrayal in ways that would be more painful than she could ever imagine.

--

"My name is Amy Ryan…" I insisted feeling very put out.

"That's the name the Agency gave you. That name has only existed for you since October of 2003." She was intent on her data, but Hotch was eyeing me with distrust. Spencer only watched us with a bemused expression.

"Fine… My first name is Amy. I was born with the surname Miller. My mother was Katherine and my father's name was Anthony. Do you want our birthdates and dates of decease as well?"

Garcia didn't look up at me but I could see the way her eyes narrowed in my direction. This would have amused me if the situation wasn't so serious. She said tightly, "Yes…"

I gave her all the information about my parents that I could remember. All of the stuff I didn't want to remember; everything that I had tried to bury for years. Spencer held onto my hand despite the distrustful looks thrown my way every so often from Garcia.

"Is there anything else you want to know," I tried to say as lightly as I could.

"No… I have all I need."

"I'm going to go back to my desk and try to clear out some paper work." Spencer said, "Do you want to go back to your room?"

"Yes…"

We started to leave, but Garcia's voice rang out like a whip snapping through the air. "You better not have anything else to hide. I'll find it and -"

"Garcia…" Spencer said to her, sounding very exasperated.

"I don't trust her baby boy." Garcia said bluntly.

"We talked about this…"

"I know… I know… We need her."

She gave me a stone cracking look. "Hurt my sweet boy and there will be no place for you to hide."

Reid rolled his eyes and pulled me from the room. "She cares a lot about you." I observed.

"She can be stifling at times, but she means well."

We headed back to the elevator and he took me all the way to my room. He turned to leave, but I put a hand on his shoulder. "Reid… you do believe that I never wanted to hurt you."

His face closed down. "I don't know that for certain Amy. I want to believe in you, but I don't know you at all."

"You know everything about me." I protested.

"No… up until five minutes ago I didn't know your real name. It makes me wonder what else you aren't telling me."

I felt an anger rising up in my chest. "I don't really know you Dr. Reid. You lied to me too."

"I don't want to talk about this now. I don't have time."

"Fine… but answer me this… Why are we going into a safe house? This is a military base. Why are we leaving here?"

His eyes shut down again. "I can't tell you that. We'll talk about everything when we get to the safe house."

He left me standing there. I was trying to be angry, but I couldn't maintain it in my heart. He and the rest of his team were right about me. I had set out to take him away from a job that I knew he loved and from a family that would die or kill to protect him. I didn't deserve to be here. I should leave before I got him hurt.

I went into my room and gathered my things together. I began to pace the room. It wasn't fair to Reid that I should stay here and make the FBI protect me. I should go before he got hurt, or his family. I didn't belong here anyway.

I searched all over trying to find paper and something to write with. I was going to leave him a note. It would be better that way. Maybe it wouldn't hurt so much if I didn't have to see his eyes when I said goodbye.

I finally found some paper and a pen. I wrote the note and was just leaving my room when a voice came from one end of the hall.

"Where do you think you're going?"

I turned to see a man standing at the end of the hall. "I'm Agent Johnson. Dr. Reid sent me to make sure you got out to the car."

"I don't -"

"Come with me and we'll meet up with Agent Hotchner and the rest of his team in the parking garage."

I shrugged and hefted the suitcase that had my belongings in it and followed the smiling agent into the elevator.

He didn't speak to me again until we got off on the garage level. I looked around and saw that we were alone in the cold concrete space. My shoes echoed off the hard floor as I turned in a circle looking for Reid and his team.

"Where is the team?"

"Oh… I don't think you need to worry about that." His hand flashed out and there was a sudden pain and dizziness as everything went dark around me.