Author's Note: Thank you for all those that read and reviewed. I appreciate your feedback very much. I wish I wasn't so busy, so that I could update this story faster, but life has other plans for me. Still, I hope you like this newest chapter. Maybe next chapter I'll finally add Summer and Ryan. Who knows?

Marissa's confused look transformed into one of intense concentration. She leaned forward slightly, peering at him intently. He saw a light spark in her eyes and he smiled faintly. "Seth? Is that you?"

Seth smiled, most of it hidden by his wild beard. "The one and only."

Marissa's eyes widened and her mouth slowly opened. She stood limply in front of him, one hand on the open door, the other hanging lifeless by her side. She stared. "Oh my God, Seth!" Marissa snapped out of her daze with a shake, her face reddening slightly, and began bouncing on her feet. "Oh my God! Oh my God!"

Seth smirked and dropped his duffle to rest by his feet. He shifted all his weight to the back of his feet and stood up a little straighter. He regarded Marissa steadily. She hadn't changed very much at all. "I think you're the first girl to ever get this excited to see me."

Marissa shut her mouth and glared at Seth, taking a step toward him and wrapping her arms around his frame. "I'm just shocked, that's all."

Seth sighed when he felt Marissa's arm around him. It had been so long since he'd had any genuine human affection, let alone felt the arms of a woman that actually wanted to touch him. "I can't imagine why." He squeezed Marissa back.

Marissa eventually pulled herself away from Seth. Seth shut his eyes briefly at the loss of the warmth of her body, but quickly opened them again and resumed his stiff posture. He wasn't here to get all sentimental. He had a purpose.

Marissa looked him up and down, frowning again. He obviously hadn't passed inspection. But she rolled her eyes and shoved him slightly. "Still the same smartass however. I guess some things never change."

Seth shrugged. "Can't help it. It's hardwired into my DNA."

Marissa rolled her eyes again and then pushed the door open farther. "Well come in."

"Where's Ryan?" Seth wasn't about to set foot inside the house without some kind of forewarning.

"Oh he's down in San Diego at some architectural conference." Marissa waved her free hand around the air. "I don't really pay attention to that kind of stuff."

Seth was both relieved and immensely disappointed. Ryan wasn't in town? Shit. What was he going to do now? He didn't think Ryan would appreciate him showing up out of nowhere and inviting himself into what was apparently his home now. "I'm not sure that's such a good idea."

"Believe me, Ryan would not be very pleased if he found out you dropped by but you disappeared again because I didn't make you stay here." Marissa then just turned around and began walking into the house.

Seth watched Marissa's retreating back and weighed his options. Enter or flee. He honestly had no clue which idea was more appealing. He had always considered the fact that neither Ryan or his parents would still be living in his old Newport home, but he had never really known what he was going to do if that turned out to be true. It was a very convenient excuse for not going through with things. A great out for when his inevitable bout of cowardice washed over him. Ryan out of town was just as good as not living there, as far as Seth was concerned. But it had been so long.

Ultimately, it came down to the simple fact that Seth was lonely. And tired. And desperate. He just wanted to be around someone who actually gave a damn for his well being and was willing to spend time with him. And while Marissa Cooper would have never been his first choice, or his second or third, she was at least a familiar face. That she hadn't rejected him outright as soon as she saw him was a big plus in her favor.

He saw Marissa's head poke back around the corner of the foyer and bark at him. "What are you waiting for? This is still your house you know."

Marissa disappeared again, which was good, as she missed Seth's breakdown. He gently closed the front door, hearing it click shut, and collapsed backwards onto its sturdy surface. His home. He still had a home. It overwhelmed him and his knees buckled. He slid down the door, feeling the decorative ridges of the door dig into his back, but he didn't care. He buried his face in his hands and sucked in a deep breath. His body wracked, he took heaving breaths, but he didn't cry, he wanted to but he just couldn't. He couldn't let himself go, couldn't let himself feel like that. Eight years and he was finally home. He was safe.

This house had been his safe haven. It had protected him for years from the harshness of the world. Protected him from Newpsies, water polo players, jealous boyfriends, angry bartenders, and whatever minions of evil lurking around the periphery of his life. It had been the place he met Ryan for the first time, had his first kiss with the presumptive love of his life, and the only place where he felt like he could truly be himself. He had been positive he had lost all that; lost the safety and the warmth. Most importantly, that he had lost the familiarity. He had been convinced he would never live a life of predictability again. No girl to come home to, no family to see, no usual bed to sleep in, and no well stocked refrigerator to raid. Just constant change and disappointment, nothing sure, nothing he could count on. Maybe he wouldn't have to depend on himself anymore. Maybe he could finally relax again.

Seth must have sat there, leaning against his front door, the door of his home, for too long. Marissa rounded the corner, searching for him, obvious annoyance in her questioning voice. He didn't look up as he heard her approach. He was too busy calming himself down. Her feet stopped and the house was completely silent; only his deep breaths could be heard clearly.

"Seth? Are you okay?" Marissa was quiet and afraid.

Seth watched Marissa take one step forward, then back, then forward again through the splayed fingers in front of his face. Reaching a decision, she took several steps forward and he felt her delicate hand land softly on his left shoulder. "It's okay, Seth."

Seth spoke into his hands, muffling his voice slightly. "I didn't think I had a home anymore. I forgot what it felt like."

Seth felt Marissa sit next to him and place her arm on his shoulders, leaning into him slightly. "You've always had a home, Seth."

Seth stiffened slightly at her words, and whatever anxiety that was left in him quickly dissipated. "Not always. Sometimes, just having a place to call home is not enough."

Marissa stiffened next to him as well and gradually her arm migrated off his shoulders. "Look Seth, I know I speak for everyone when I say that I am very happy to see you."

Seth finally pulled his face away from the protective shield of his rough hands and looked at Marissa skeptically. "Everyone?"

Marissa nodded once and leaned further into his body, bumping his shoulder with her own. "Yeah. Even Ryan."

"I find that a little hard to believe."

Marissa carefully pushed herself to her full height and held out her hand to him. "The floor is cold."

Seth smiled and after staring at Marissa's proffered hand he grabbed it firmly. "I'm kind of used to it."

"Well, I'm not." She helped pull Seth to his feet and then sniffed the air. A disgusted look overtook her face. "Jesus, Seth, when was the last time you had a shower?"

Seth rolled his eyes and lifted his duffel back to his shoulder. "I don't smell that bad. I do believe in personal hygiene despite my appearance."

"If you say so." Marissa sniffed again and shook her head. She spun around on her heel and for the second time walked into the house. Over her shoulder she encouraged him to follow.

Seth laughed and looked around the foyer. The house was just as he remembered. Big and spacious, lights brightly shining in welcome, warm. Stepping through the front door was like walking back to when he was 16 and his biggest concern was whether or not Summer had smiled at him or some random guy walking behind him. It was amazing how often he had managed to get that question wrong. But now, he was so far removed from those days that he could hardly remember them. His house was still his house. Thank God.

Readjusting the strap of his duffel on his shoulder, he tentatively walked forward. He still wasn't sold on the idea of staying here without Ryan. Why would Ryan even trust him? Wouldn't Ryan just think he was trying to move in on another one of his girls? But Seth was willing to give things a try, nostalgia was a powerful motivator.

He moved out of the foyer and approached the hallways that interspersed the house. He reached out and ran the tips of his fingers along the walls as he walked by them, closing his eyes.

"Mommy, who's that?"

Seth halted his movements and quickly yanked his hands back down to his sides. He opened his eyes and scanned the very large room in front of him. To his left was a very plush looking couch. He looked at the couch wistfully, its enormous pillows looking completely inviting. Sitting on the couch was a little girl, long light brown hair pulled back and resting on her back. She had a curious look on her face and Seth narrowed his eyes.

"He's a friend of your daddy, Kayla."

"How come I've never seen him before?"

Seth chuckled, but it was so quiet that he didn't think the two people in front of him had heard. He watched Marissa flounder to try and come up with an explanation that made sense to her daughter but she came up with nothing. She twisted her head to plead him with her eyes. Seth smiled, widely and obvious, and dropped his duffel to the floor, pushing it out of the way with his foot. He walked farther into the room and got a better look at his niece.

It was plain as day whose daughter she was as soon as he studied her. She had Ryan's eyes and his ability to pin you to the ground with a look. But she clearly took after her mother where it counted. It was like he was looking at mini-Marissa.

Seth wasn't sure exactly what to say, although he wanted to make a good impression. If Marissa didn't want her to know that he was her uncle, that was perfectly fine with him. He wouldn't push, and it was probably for the best. Who knew how things would turn out between him and his family, no need letting a kid get attached. Seth snorted slightly and he felt a strong urge to smack himself. Not that she'd get attached in the first place, but it was hard for his ego to let something like that go. He was Seth Cohen. He was awesome. Or at least, he used to be.

Still, he didn't have much experience dealing with kids. Who knew what the right thing to say was? "What's your name? I'm Seth."

The girl leaned forward from her perch on the couch and peered intently at him. Seth felt like fidgeting but forced himself to stay still. It was completely uncanny the way she looked at him. "I'm Mikayla, but everyone calls me Kayla."

"That's a pretty name." Seth leaned forward a little, lowering his voice conspiratorially. "Personally, I think Seth is kind of dorky."

Mikayla giggled briefly and she winked at him. "I agree!" Then she leaned back and laughed.

"Not afraid to tell it like it is I see. Definitely an Atwood." Seth tried to glare at the giggling girl, but she was too cute, all squirming body and open face. He couldn't find it in him.

Mikayla turned to her mother and grabbed her hand, pulling Marissa closer to her. Marissa was smiling relaxed and didn't resist her daughter's demand. "Don't you agree, Mommy?"

Marissa laughed and Seth rolled his eyes as she grinned up at him. "Oh yes, sweetie, I've thought that way for a long time."

Seth looked pointedly at Mikayla. "Watch it Cooper, I know stuff."

"Ha! What do you know? You've been gone since forever." Marissa was all arrogant haughtiness and Seth briefly felt tempted to prove her wrong, but he merely glared at her instead. "I knew it, you've got nothing."

"You know mommy too?" Mikayla was looking back at him curiously and most of the amusement from her eyes had drifted away.

Seth wasn't exactly sure what to say, but Marissa was still smirking at him, so he coughed into his hand, "TJ." It was all he really had.

Marissa's eyes widened and quickly looked between him and Mikayla spastically, clearly nervous. "Seth!"

It was Seth's turn to smirk now and he sat down on a chair across from the couch triumphantly. Marissa was glaring openly at him now and she had an arm wrapped tightly around her daughter, as if protecting her from him. Seth decided to address Mikayla's question as best he could. "I knew both your mom and dad a long time ago. We went to high school together."

"So you're like Lacey?"

Seth blinked and turned his head to Marissa, lost and confused. Marissa quickly supplied the information he was looking for by mouthing 'best friend' to him. Seth nodded his head in understanding and turned back to Mikayla. "Sort of. Your dad was like my Lacey."

Mikayla grew quiet and tapped her fingers along her leg. "How come you've been gone then?"

Marissa rescued him from answering that loaded question. "Come on, sweetie, it's time for bed. You can pester Seth tomorrow." Marissa pulled Mikayla off the couch and stood up herself.

"But mooom, I'm not tired and I don't pester!" Mikayla interlocked her arms across her chest and glared at her mother.

Marissa just ignored Mikayla's protestations and started leading her upstairs. "You've stayed up too late already."

"Fine." She jerked her hand out of Marissa's grasp and turned to face Seth. He just watched her amused. He could not believe that Marissa was a mother, or Ryan was a father for that matter, and even with the proof standing in front of him, it was still incredible. "Goodnight Seth." Mikayla walked upstairs, without her mother's cajoling.

Marissa turned her head over her shoulder to look at him and he laughed when she rolled her eyes. "I'll be back in a bit. Make yourself comfortable."

Seth had given up trying to sit still on the chair five minutes ago. He was no longer the antsy, hyperactive kid he used to be, but it still felt unnatural to sit in one place, doing nothing but trying to behave himself, for any length of time. He was used to moving, to acting, it was something he had grown accustomed to during his long trip. So now his head was buried inside the refrigerator searching for anything edible. Marissa had said to make himself comfortable.

The fridge was packed full of foods Seth had forgotten even existed. Being on the road, frequently with only 50 bucks to his name, had led Seth to a rather limited palette. It wasn't like they had eaten gourmet food every night, but nowadays, fancy food for Seth was a hamburger at Applebees. Looking at the fridge just reminded Seth what a sad state his life was in and he laughed at himself as he tentatively pulled out a takeout container of Thai food. God, that brought back memories. Seth hadn't had Thai food in years.

He had just shut the door when Marissa padded into the kitchen. She took one look at the container in his hand and laughed, walking to the fridge herself and pulling out another container of food. The two moved to opposite sides of the kitchen island and ate quietly. After a few bites of the heavenly food, Seth felt compelled to break the silence. "Cute kid. How old is she?"

Marissa slurped a noodle into her mouth before answering. "Five. She turns six in January." Marissa thrust her chopsticks back into her container and pulled out more food. "And she's a pain in the butt."

"Takes after you I see?"

"Very funny." Marissa glared and pointed threateningly at him with one of her chopsticks. Seth did his best to look innocent. "Actually, she reminds me a lot of you. Or she reminds me of you if you were a five-year-old girl. I can't really decide which."

"I have been told I'm in touch with my feminine side from time to time."

"I don't doubt it."

Seth chuckled.

"I wish you had been there to see her be born."

"Really?" Seth was more than a little surprised.

"Of course. I mean, you and I were never that close, I get that, but you're family. You're her family and I think Ryan really missed not having you there."

"I can't believe you're a mom. Totally didn't see it all those years ago."

Marissa laughed and kind of lowered her eyes in embarrassment. "To be honest, neither did I. And let me tell you, having a baby in the middle of Freshman year is so not the way to go about college." Marissa drifted off, probably reliving some of her old memories. "But we had a lot of help with Mikayla those first few years and I think we did okay."

Seth chuckled as he thought of his mother. "I bet mom was thrilled to have a grandkid."

Marissa laughed with him and her eyes sparkled. "Kirsten has been awesome. She and Sandy have both been very supportive. You were a lucky kid."

"I know." Seth was quiet and contemplative. He could only imagine how much Hell he had put his parents through. He was such a selfish bastard.

"And of course there was Summer. Sometimes I think she loves Mikayla more than me."

"Who?" Seth eyes widened slightly and he wanted to hit himself. He could not believe he had just said that aloud. Was he stupid or something? Like Marissa Cooper, of all people, would believe he forgot who Summer was. It wasn't entirely his fault though, he had been trained like a Pavlovian dog to evade Summer at all costs. It was purely an involuntary reaction now.

Marissa appeared to share his disbelief. "I'm sorry, what?"

Seth was committed, so he carried on the ruse. "Summer who?"

Marissa stared at him like he had two heads and leaned toward him, completely amazed. "You can't be serious."

Seth shook his head and could barely force the words past his lips. "I don't know who you're talking about."

"You're shitting me right?" When Seth didn't respond, Marissa dropped her chopstick down on the counter in disgust. "Summer Roberts? My best friend since like forever? About this tall," Marissa held a hand up above her shoulders, "with dark hair, and a really big mouth?" Seth still pretended that he didn't know who she meant. Marissa continued on, "And oh yeah, the girl you've been completely obsessed with since you were 6."

That was too much for Seth, he couldn't do it anymore. It physically made him sick to pretend that Summer didn't exist. Most of the time he didn't realize he was doing it, which made it easy to go through with it, but now, with Marissa looking at him all betrayed and the disbelief clearly radiating from her, he was forced to face what he was trying to do. Indignant, he said, "I was not obsessed!" He had always hated how people said he was obsessed with Summer. Was it his fault that he was really observant and found every little thing she did completely fascinating and adorable? God, seriously. "And I was 8, not 6."

Marissa picked up her discarded chopstick and waved it at him triumphantly. "You really had me going there for a second. I don't think you're even capable of forgetting Summer. It's like one of the constants of the Universe."

Marissa was mostly right. Seth had never forgotten her, and never would. There had been times in the past eight years where he had not thought about Summer. He had his dry spells, usually when he was too drunk to walk straight or too poor to eat. Only in the good times did his thoughts center on the dark-haired girl that had crushed what was left of his meager spirit in high school. Which was kind of ironic that his thoughts of her carried such negative connotations, yet he really only thought of her when he was doing okay. He was never great, or even good, just merely okay. Maybe it was the idea of lost opportunity that really appealed to him during those times. Which again didn't make much sense, but Seth had learned long ago that his attraction to Summer was based on purely nonsensical terms. It had become the norm over the years to just deny her existence. He had done so out of necessity. He had to protect his psyche, and staying infatuated with a girl he could never have was just not healthy. Plus, Kat had never really appreciated his musings for another girl. And after Kat, it had become easier to deny Summer.

"God, I can almost imagine her face when I tell her you forgot about her." Marissa laughed for a good amount of time, nearly choking on her food in the process.

"Hey, maybe it's not a good idea to let her know? I'm sure she doesn't remember who I am."

Marissa calmed down and made sure to chew her food slowly and carefully. "Oh no, I've got to tell her. You being back is huge." Seth noticed that Marissa didn't say anything about Summer forgetting him. Did she just not hear him or was she trying to spare his feelings? "Besides, if you're going to hang around here, you're gonna have to get used to Summer." Seth looked at Marissa questioningly and she explained. "She visits a couple of times a week. She's Mikayla's godmother."

"Ah, well, I guess it's inevitable then."

"Pretty much."

They ate quietly again, and Seth actually felt a little more comfortable. This was completely new to him and yet it felt like he had never left home. And Marissa was surprisingly not annoying, a sharp contrast to how he'd sometimes viewed her before he left. "So you and Ryan huh?" Again, Seth felt like he had to say something. He couldn't stand the silence. What if Marissa was thinking about how this was a mistake? About how he was a terrible person, who smelled and dressed like a bum? What if she decided to kick him back out on the street? He couldn't let her dwell.

"Yeah. Got married just after we graduated from college."

Wow. Ryan was married. His brother was married. Seth couldn't even comprehend what that meant. Marriage? That was a completely foreign concept to him. For one to get married, one had to have a girl interested in doing so. With him. That would never happen. Hell he hadn't even been with a girl that he had considered cohabitating with let alone marrying. Well, except for one.

Ryan had a wife. He had a daughter. He had a family. His brother had grown up and changed a lot since he left. Seth could not deny the pain of regret that settled over him. He had missed everything. His niece being born, his brother getting married, his family transforming and expanding. He had been excluded from all that through his own actions, and what did he have to show for it? Absolutely nothing. He hadn't even finished high school.

"Guess my invitation got lost in the mail huh?" Seth tried to make his comment sound like a joke, but he couldn't prevent the bitterness from coming through.

Marissa frowned and looked at him concerned. "Not funny."

Seth bowed his head and shut his eyes. "Yeah. I know. Too soon."

"Ryan – we – wanted you to be there, but when we stopped hearing from Anna during Junior year, we, well, we thought something had, uh, happened to you."

Seth nodded his head once and sat down heavily on one of the stools. He pushed his still full container away from him and put his head into his hands. "That was a bad time for me."

"What happened?"

"I'd rather not talk about it." Seth sighed and lifted his head to glance over at Marissa. Marissa looked like she was about to object so Seth hurriedly cut her off. "It's not that I don't want to talk about it, like ever, but I'd really like to only go through it once." Marissa didn't seem very satisfied with his answer but she didn't push. He could clearly see the curiosity and desire to get answers from him written all over his face, but he was grateful for her restraint. "Speaking of which, where are my parents?" Seth craned his neck to look at the house, as if noticing for the first time that his parents were nowhere to be seen.

Marissa gave him one last look before standing up and putting her container of food away. "They moved back to Berkley after we got married. The house was kind of our wedding present from them."

"Wow, some gift."

"Yeah, well they offered to get us our own house, but Ryan insisted we stay here." Marissa shrugged her shoulders.

"He did?"

"He didn't want to move in case you ever decided to come back." Marissa stated matter of fact and looked at him with an almost accusatory glare.

"Oh." Seth didn't really know what to say to that.

"You know he's been looking for you. Both him and Sandy."

"He has?"

"There was a time after you first left where I think he was too pissed off to care. But when I got pregnant Senior year at Harbor he changed. We both changed, and I don't mean the whole 'we're high school kids who suddenly have to deal with a kid' cliché, but I just mean like everything. Ryan wasn't the same after Mikayla, his whole attitude changed."

"Wow, you are like, so old." Seth smirked and Marissa laughed, brushing her hair off her face. "Seriously, though, I had no idea."

"Yeah, well, whose fault is that?"

"I just, I thought he didn't want anything to do with me. None of them did."

Marissa didn't respond, instead standing up and pacing around in front of him. "I need to call Ryan. And your parents."

"Wait, hold on."

Marissa spun around and fixed him with a withering glare. "You have to tell them. You're not leaving without saying something."

Seth stood up and held his hand ups to ward against Marissa's ire. "You can wait to call them in the morning. I just want a chance to relax and get used to everything."

"Maybe it isn't about you, did you ever think of that?" Marissa slammed a hand against the counter top and Seth finally saw some of the emotion he was expecting to see when he first showed up at her front door. "God, do you have any idea what you've put them through? They deserve to know! Like now! Jesus, they don't even know if you're still alive."

"I'm sorry!" Seth backed away from Marissa, feeling his anxiety building up inside of him again. He pushed aside the right side of his jacket and his hand fumbled around for his bag of pills. He suddenly had a pounding headache and he needed it to go away. He pulled out his bag and nearly ripped the flimsy plastic open to pull out some pills. He shoved them into his mouth and swallowed them.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Marissa nearly screamed at him, her face contorted in a mix of horror and real anger. "Are you on drugs?"

Seth shoved his baggie back into his jacket and shook his head vigorously. "No! No, they're just for pain. Like Tylenol."

"Why the hell are you taking pain pills like they're candy?"

That was a good question. One he wasn't sure he could answer. "Um, I just need to, okay?"

"That's a shitty answer." Marissa calmed down a little, but her voice was still taught and hard. "You better not be using anything, or else I'll kick your ass out of here and fuck Ryan if he gets pissed at me."

"I swear to you I'm not using drugs. I've never used a drug in my life."

Marissa stared at him for what felt like hours. His brow was sweaty and he suddenly felt like his clothes were too tight. But he didn't bolt for the door, and he was proud of himself for lasting under her very skeptical eyes. "Fine, but if you're lying to me, so help me –"

Marissa never finished her sentence. He could tell she was as much at a loss for an adequate threat as he was for imagining what skinny, 100 pound Marissa could ever do to him. But then there was Ryan and that was a totally different circumstance. So he figured maybe it would be a good idea not to push Marissa.

Seth reached into his jacket and pulled the baggie out of his pocket again. He held the baggie out to Marissa. "Here, you can have them if you want." He really, really, really hoped she didn't take the bag.

Marissa sighed and seemed to relax. "No, it's okay. Just promise me that you won't do anything stupid while you're here."

Inwardly, he nearly collapsed to the ground in relief as he put the baggie back where it belonged. "I promise. And I promise to stay away from Mikayla too if you want."

For a few brief seconds, he thought Marissa looked ashamed because she was tempted to take him up on his offer and she turned her face away from him. "You don't have to, she is your niece after all. I just want to – I just – I don't know. This is all too much."

"Yeah, I get that. You know what? I'm really tired. Maybe I could crash somewhere, like the couch or something." God that couch seemed even more inviting now than it did an hour ago. "Maybe it would be best if I just got out of your hair for a while and let you process everything."

"That is actually a good idea. I mean it's a little early, but I could use some time to take this all in."

Seth nodded his head in assurance. "Yes, yes, exactly. So just point me in the direction of the couch and I'll get out of your way."

Marissa looked at him funny. "What are you talking about? The couch? You can't sleep on the couch."

"I can't?"

"Putting aside the fact that I'm not sure I want your grungy ass anywhere near my couch, when was the last time you even slept in a real bed?"

Seth blinked and thought about an answer. He really couldn't remember. "I honestly have no idea."

"I figured as much." Marissa seemed to come to a decision and she said, "Come on." And she walked out of the kitchen toward the stairs.

"I'm not sleeping in the poolhouse?" Seth had thought that's where she'd put him. It made the most sense to him. It was a part of the house, kind of, but far away to make sure he didn't contaminate the life she and Ryan had carefully constructed. "Where are we going."

"To your room."

Seth froze, one foot on the first step of the stairs. "My room?"

"Yeah." Marissa turned her head to look down at him. "You okay? You look kind of sick."

Seth swallowed and forced himself to speak. "I-I'm okay. I just, my room?"

"I wanted to change it, turn it into another kid's bedroom in case we had any more kids, but Ryan refused. He would always tell me, we have to keep it just how it is in case you came back." She became silent, then added, "Those fights weren't fun."

Seth sighed. Even when he was out of their lives he was screwing them up. "I just don't believe it. I never thought, hell, I don't know."

"Like I said, this is still your house." She started climbing back up the stairs and Seth was forced to follow her. When he crested the stairs, he saw Marissa standing in front of a very familiar door. She grabbed the door knob and turned. She pushed the door inwards and stepped inside.

Seth wanted to follow so badly, but he didn't think he could. It was something he didn't think he was ready for. He walked up to the threshold of the door and tried to step inside, but he stopped. He placed the palm of his hand flush with the door and closed his eyes, breathing in deeply. Everything was going to be okay. This was just his room. He took a tentative step forward. It was not quite as bad as he thought it would be.

Each step was easier than the last and finally moved into his room completely. He looked around the spacious place and felt the breath sucked out of his lungs. It was exactly the same. Nothing had changed. His map of Tahiti was still where he left it, his Rooney poster was still hanging on his wall, his computer, his bed, even his desk was still the same unorganized mess as when he'd left this place eight years ago. It was too much and Seth had to sit down. "I – I – I don't –" Seth suddenly felt like a scared, lonely 16-year-old kid again.

The bed shifted underneath him and he felt Marissa's hand land on his shoulder. "It's okay, Seth. It's okay."

It really wasn't. Too many memories were assaulting him. Too much longing and desire for something he was sure he had lost. Too much loneliness. He turned his head toward Marissa and did something he hadn't done in what felt like a lifetime. He cried. He pushed his face into Marissa's shoulder and the tears slowly began to trickle out his eyes. He was sobbing and Marissa rubbed his back with smooth, rhythmic circles. He was finally home.