Author's Note: As usual, thank you to all those who reviewed. I want to say that the next two weeks will be very busy for me (with Thanksgiving coming up soon) so it's doubtful I will update during that time. So I guess you could say I'm going on a mini-hiatus. I should update again after the holiday. Hopefully, this chapter will help ease the pain a little bit. This chapter is entirely Seth/Summer based and I hope that I did a good job. I know many of you have been looking forward to something like this and I just hope I did them justice.

Seth lifelessly lifted the spoon from out of his cereal bowl and tried to put it inside his mouth. It took three attempts, the first time impacting against the right side of his mouth, the second against his closed lips, the third finally hitting the roof of his mouth before settling haphazardly on his tongue. He wasn't all there at the moment.

He dropped the spoon back into his bowl and placed both his hands on the table, palms down. He looked out toward the pool and his backyard, watching the sun slowly set in the horizon. It was a beautiful sight, and one that would have normally calmed him and inspired him. Now he didn't really care. It was useless beauty. He just didn't feel anything.

He'd been home now for five days. It was still difficult to grasp the fact that Newport was home again, but he was acclimating himself to the feeling better than he expected. A few more days and it probably wouldn't even register with him anymore. Things were going well in that regard.

He and Ryan had continued to talk after his breakdown and they had come to a kind of understanding. Ryan assured him that he was no longer angry and was just very happy to have him back. Seth almost believed him. He was still wracked with guilt over everything that happened, but he was starting to accept it and put it past him. Putting it behind him was going to be a lengthy process though, and he was not looking forward to it. It was not going to be easy. It became even more difficult with the fact that he just didn't care anymore. He was so damn tired. There was only so much he could take, and he had reached his limit days ago. He had never had a very high tolerance to begin with; he just wasn't strong like that. Ryan had forgiven him and that was all that his mind could process for the moment.

He spun his spoon inside his bowl of cereal. Suddenly, the mini vortex he created became the most interesting thing in the world to him. Everything just faded away. It was an apt distraction, mirroring the feeling of the world sucking him down.

He was alone. Everybody had left for dinner 20 minutes ago. They had invited him of course, his mother the loudest and most insistent voice, but he had not wanted to go. It was too much. All of them at once? All of them asking him the same questions and demanding the same answers? He was liable to slit his wrists with a butter knife. It was hard enough dealing with Ryan and Marissa individually. He couldn't even comprehend how overwhelming it would be to sit at a small table, surrounded by everyone he had hurt and disappointed, all staring at him expectantly. All waiting. He knew he was running away again, but this time it was an act of sheer survival.

Seth suspected that they were all relieved as much as he was. Things had been awkward to say the least. His parents had been overjoyed to see him, and they had showered him with so much affection that if he were still an immature teenager, would have made him sick. But the honeymoon period was waning and things were starting to get tense. Everybody was now walking on eggshells around him. There were looks, whispered comments when they thought he wasn't looking, people would leave the room if he entered because they wanted to discuss something and were either too worried he'd overhear or were too uncomfortable to discuss it in front of him. It was making him crazy. He was pretty sure they were going crazy. The whole situation was screwed up.

So he figured it was for the best that he didn't go with them. They certainly weren't going to force him; they were too afraid he'd bolt again if they tried something like that. That didn't mean they wouldn't use guilt or any other means at their disposal to get their way. But Seth had been adamant, he wanted to give them a chance to take it all in, to let things settle and get away from him for a little bit. They would be around those who were most familiar to them and should be able to come to terms with how much he'd changed. That was probably the hardest thing of all. His parents looked at him like he was still 16. He didn't blame them, it wasn't their fault. But he wasn't that naïve boy anymore. He had grown up and seen too much shit in his life to still be the kid they thought he was. He knew it was going to take them as long to adjust to the new him as it was for him to adjust to his new surroundings.

He wasn't that hungry anyway. His body was used to running on low fuel, so to speak. A bowl of cereal, even half eaten, was still enough to sustain him for several hours. He didn't know what he'd do with a whole plate of food in front of him. Could he even eat it all? It'd been so long since he'd eaten in a restaurant.

He let go of his spoon in disgust and stood up from his chair. It was past twilight now and he could just begin to see stars appear in the sky. He contemplated going outside and just sitting by the pool. He figured it'd be relaxing and give him more time to think. He was just about to head out there when the doorbell rang.

With a sigh he walked toward the front door. What now? Maybe it was robbers? God, he hoped so. Of course, people intending to rob the place were unlikely to ring the doorbell, but he prayed that they were polite thieves. Hopefully, they'd put him out of his misery on their way out. Was it wrong to hope for a home invasion? He thought yes, but still didn't care.

Without looking at who it might be, he opened the door with a weary look on his face. It was surprising then when he noticed Summer standing on the other side of the door. For longer than he would ever admit, he contemplated just slamming the door in her face. She was still the last person he wanted to see. When he had first seen her that morning with Marissa all those days ago, he had felt a wave of familiarity and pain wash over him. He had done his best to ignore her, not look at her, but then he had thrown out that stupid little greeting, undoubtedly giving her the satisfaction of knowing she still affected him. Which was completely true, but he didn't want her to know that and he certainly didn't like it. He had made huge strides in dealing with his history with her. He didn't want to regress and become the befuddled teenager again that lost all ability to think straight whenever she so much as looked at him.

He was a changed man now. He had been through too much, largely because of the girl in front of him. He wasn't going to let her get to him again, wasn't going to let her destroy the life he was attempting to reconstruct. Which was why he didn't slam the door. Doing so would only prove that she still had power over him. He was going to be mature, aloof, show her that he was the bigger man. He would do his best to act normal and uninterested. Because that's what he was: uninterested. He was going to be cool.

Summer seemed as surprised as he was to see him standing in front of her. Her mouth moved, but nothing came out, and he thought she looked very nervous. "Oh, it's you."

Seth leaned against the doorframe and appraised her with a quick scan. It was impossible not to look at her, she was still the stunningly beautiful girl from his past, and if it were possible, her fashion sense seemed to have improved. He finished his scan and settled his eyes on her face. He smirked. "It's me."

Silence. Summer continued to look uncomfortable and for once, Seth felt like he had the upper hand. He had the advantage of just not caring, of being uninterested. He had the advantage of eight years to think about what had happened and put it behind him. He had accepted the status of their relationship, namely that there wasn't one and never would be, as irrefutable fact. Being around her just didn't make him flustered anymore, because he refused to let it. He raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. "I assume you came here for a reason?"

Summer blinked and composed herself quickly, smoothing her hands down her sides. "I need to talk to Coop. It's important."

Seth nodded once and looked over his shoulder into the house. He wasn't sure why he did it, he knew Marissa wasn't there. "She's not here." He saw the disappointed look on her face and felt compelled to add, "She went to dinner with everybody else."

"And you didn't go too?"

"Nope. Wasn't hungry."

"Oh." Summer fidgeted with her purse and looked down at her feet.

"I briefly contemplated blasting some Bob Seger and sliding along the floor in my underwear, but I thought maybe that was too minty even for me."

Summer's head flew up quickly and she smiled wide at him. "Come on Cohen, since when do you have any self-respect?"

Seth chuckled lightly and motioned with his hand for her to follow him. "Good point." He held the door open as she passed by him and he involuntarily took in a breath of her perfume. Sweet Moses she smelled fantastic. He waited until she was several feet away from him before taking a few breaths to calm himself and close the door. He didn't care. He didn't like how he had to keep reminding himself that.

Summer walked straight for the big couch dominating the family room and sat down with a huff. "Why is it that whenever I need her she's always busy?"

Seth sat down in the sinfully comfortable chair across from her. "How dare she live her own life, doesn't she know you might need her at a moment's notice?"

Summer slapped the couch with both hands. "I know! I swear the things I have to put up with." She smiled and her eyes sparkled.

Seth rolled his eyes and leaned back into the chair even more. "Maybe I could help you out."

Summer's amusement immediately disappeared and was replaced with intense awkwardness. Seth could feel it emanating off her in waves. "Um, no, that's okay. It's uh, kind of girl talk."

Seth shrugged and shut his eyes. Maybe a nice nap would help things. "All right." He placed his hands in his lap and tried to steady his breathing. He knew his obvious indifference would drive her crazy. He began counting down in his head.

"Are you falling asleep on me?" She sounded annoyed and he had to fight the urge to smile. She cracked even faster than he expected. Good old Summer, can't stand it when she's not the center of attention.

He still wouldn't open his eyes. She'd know immediately he was messing with her if he did. "Maybe I am, it is kind of getting late."

"What are you 80? It's only 8:30."

"Why yes, Summer, I've aged 60 years since we last saw each other. You better be careful, I sometimes find it difficult to maintain bladder control."

"Okay Cohen, that's disgusting."

Seth finally opened his eyes and grinned. "What can I say? If I've got nothing to entertain me, it's just not worth it."

"Fiiiine." Summer shifted in her seat, the awkwardness back. Seth followed her movement and couldn't help but notice just the expanse of smooth thigh as her skirt slid up her legs. What reasonable explanation could there be for her to wear a skirt that short if she only wanted to talk to Marissa? It was down right cruel. Seth sighed and briefly shut his eyes to banish the sight from his mind. This was not fair, why was he being punished like this? "I wanted to talk to Marissa about – well, about something Nick asked me the other day."

Ah, the boyfriend. Or Seth figured he was the boyfriend. He actually didn't know. "Did he like ask for a kidney or something?"

Summer glared at him and he actually smiled. Wow, he had missed that look. Summer Roberts was the only girl he'd ever met who could be sexy while looking like she wanted to rip off your head and spit down your neck. It was an odd turn on. "What the hell kind of dumbass question is that?"

"I don't know, you're the one acting like this is some kind of life and death situation. I'm just trying to lighten the mood."

"No, you're being an idiot." Summer snapped and her face darkened slightly.

Seth had to fight the urge to snap back. He was not going to let Summer get to him. He was Zen. He was calm. Summer didn't affect him anymore. "We can sit here all night and take turns insulting each other or you can tell me what the hell crawled up your ass."

Summer sprung up and grabbed her purse. "God, I knew talking to you would be a mistake. Tell Coop I was here, do you think you can handle that?"

Seth just smirked and closed his eyes again. He knew how this went. It may have been years, but Summer was still Summer. She hadn't changed that much; he had determined that in less that 30 seconds of observing her. Yes, he really was that good. He frowned though when he realized what that meant. He didn't like it one bit. "I'll try." Dealing with Summer was like fishing, sometimes you just had to let the bait sit teasingly out there and wait for it to be snatched up, and when it was, you had to slowly reel it back in. Summer hated not getting her way, and she hated being ignored even more.

She actually let out a min-scream of frustration and he just knew she was stomping her feet. Then she was silent and he knew she was sitting down, a death glare on her face. He didn't have to actually see these things to know they were happening. He knew too freaking well. "You think you're so smug, don't you?"

Seth laughed and opened his eyes. "Think? No."

"Asshole."

"Same to you, sweetheart."

"Excuse me?"

"Oh right, I'm sorry, princess."

"Shut up."

"Doll face?"

"Ugh! No!"

"Toots?"

"Oh you did not just call me that."

Seth grinned and continued on. "How about honey?"

Summer was perched on the edge of her seat, just waiting to pounce in attack. "Call me one more name and I'll kill you."

Seth held up a hand and leaned toward her. "Wait, I know how this goes. This is where you kiss me, right?"

Summer picked up a pillow and tossed it at him hard. He easily ducked it and laughed. "You wish, loser." But Summer was smiling faintly.

Seth knew just the thing to take the wind out of her sails. "Actually, no. I stopped wishing for that a long time ago."

"Oh." She was suddenly very quiet. Seth let out a triumphant cheer. An internal triumphant cheer.

"So what's this problem you got with your boyfriend?"

Summer blinked and the sad look on her face gradually drained away to be replaced by an apprehensive one. "I don't know if it's a good idea to talk about this with, uh, you."

"I don't care." That had so many different connotations.

"Oh, okay." She actually looked disappointed, but he shook that feeling off. "Well, um, you see," and she paused and looked down at her hands, "he asked me to go to London with him for four months and I don't know what to do."

"This is a hard question for you?"

"Well, yeah. It's four months, Cohen."

Seth snorted and picked at a piece of lint on his shirt. "Big deal. Hell, if you don't want to go with him, tell him I'm interested. I've always wanted to see Big Ben." The sad part was, he was not being completely facetious.

Summer frowned and Seth watched her hands fidget. "Come on Cohen, be serious. Moving in together is a big step."

"I wouldn't know."

If it were possible, Summer looked even more uncomfortable than she had before. Her skin was flushed, which actually made her even more appealing, and she was now playing with the zipper on her purse. "Um, right, well trust me, it is. I just don't know if I'm ready."

Seth sighed and looked at Summer steadily. His eyes didn't waver, he didn't squirm; he was rather proud of himself for handling things so well. Summer was obviously having problems, though he had no idea why. Okay, he could understand why she might be embarrassed or feel things were awkward considering how they had left things, but she was having a much harder time dealing with their talk than he was. He had never seen her so out of sorts before. She was usually one of the most in control people he knew. It was actually kind of disconcerting.

But was he really going to do this? He didn't know if he could sit and give Summer relationship advice in a mature manner. It was Summer for God's sake. Why the hell would he tell her to get involved with someone else? It went against every inclination he had, and he had to fight to ignore the voice screaming in his head to stop. He wasn't going to stop though. If nothing else, this was a chance to prove to himself that he was really and truly done with Summer Roberts.

"Okay, look. How long have you two been together?"

"Um, about a year."

"So you've been together a year – "

Summer interjected, "I said about a year."

Seth arched an eyebrow and gave Summer a look. Oooookay, so it seemed to be a touchy subject. "Right, okay, about a year. I assume you like this guy, although knowing you, that's not actually a requirement." Seth realized what he'd said and cursed himself. He was not going to get bitter. He wasn't. He was going to remain detached if it killed him.

Summer immediately got angry and he quickly held up a hand to stall her forthcoming comment. "Sorry, sorry, that was uncalled for." Summer calmed down instantly and relaxed into the couch with a pout. "But anyway, so you like him? You've been together about a year. Why is this difficult for you?"

"Because!" Summer threw her hands up in frustration. Then she let out a long growl.

"Why? I don't understand."

"Because it just is."

Seth rolled his eyes. "That makes perfect sense." He climbed out of his chair and before he really knew what he was doing, he was sitting on the edge of the coffee table, less than a couple of feet from her. He could reach out and touch her leg if he wanted. But of course he didn't want that. "I just think, from what I know of the situation, which is obviously not much, that you don't really have a reason not to go. I mean, he's your boyfriend, you like him, and you probably don't want the relationship to end."

Summer withdrew her legs until they were resting underneath her, and leaned further into the couch cushion. She gave him a very skeptical look. "So you're saying I should go."

"Noooo, I'm not saying what you should do either way. What I am saying is that going seems to be the logical solution. But that's based on what superficial information I have."

"Who the hell are you? You are not Seth Cohen."

Seth normally would have laughed at a comment like that, even if it was only a sympathy laugh, but now it just wasn't worth it. He had changed. "Most of the time, I have no idea."

"I'm not sure I like it."

"Maybe if I disappear for another eight years, I'll come back like I used to be."

"Um, yeah, how are you by the way?"

"Alive."

"Oh." He didn't mean to be curt with her, but he really didn't want to talk about his past. Especially not with her. She was a huge reason why he even had a past to hide to begin with. "You know you can talk to me if you want."

"Are you sure you want to risk the personal embarrassment of being seen with me? I know how much your reputation means to you." Damnit! He had told himself he wasn't going to get bitter and look what happened? It was just impossible. She looked too good, smelled too good, was coming off as too vulnerable. He couldn't help but dredge up some of his old memories.

To his surprise she didn't get angry with him, she just got quiet. She avoided his eyes and looked resolutely at the far corner of the coffee table he was sitting on. "I'm sorry."

"Oh no, I don't think so." Seth sprung to his feet and began to pace in front of her. He was supremely agitated, angry, hurt, everything. He couldn't deal with this right now. "I don't want to hear it." It was his fault for even bringing it up. He hit his fist into his thigh. He was so stupid. He was never going to get past this shit if he kept thinking about it. He had to stop.

Summer got up from the couch and reached out to grab his arm. Seth stopped completely, nearly tripping over his own feet in the process. He looked down at her small, delicate hand firmly grasping his arm. He had felt almost like he had touched a live wire when her slender fingers landed on his skin. It wasn't that clichéd instant magnetism you read about in romance novels, but more like a physical manifestation of the surprise he felt that she was actually touching him. Touching him. Summer was touching him. What the fuck? She hadn't done that, hell, Seth couldn't even remember the last time she had touched him. He didn't like it, and yet, as he stared transfixed at her fingers, he knew he didn't want her to let go.

Summer did let go though. Almost immediately after touching him, she pulled her hand away as if she had been burned. She shook her hand wildly, like she was trying to put out flames dancing along the tips of her fingers. She blushed a deep red and took a few steps away from him. "S-sorry."

He stared at her, not blinking, hardly breathing. She was being so damned shy and coy and bashful it was impossible not to be sucked in by her. She hadn't acted like this with him since the Wonder Woman incident at Chrismukkah. It was intoxicating. He had to get away from her.

He quickly walked toward the kitchen. He needed something to drink. He needed to put distance between them. You hate her. You don't like her. You don't care. She'll just fuck you over at the first opportunity she gets. He had to repeat that litany through his head over and over again as he practically tore the handle off the refrigerator in his haste to open its door.

The door opened and he nearly dived inside its cool comfort. Anything to get away from Summer. He wanted something alcoholic, but he was willing to settle for anything cold at this point. He plucked a solitary beer hidden behind takeout containers and pulled it toward him. A hand landed on his clothed shoulder and he spun around in a panic. "Don't touch me!" He barked at Summer and scrambled away from her, the beer clutched in his hand like a weapon he needed to protect himself.

He put the barrier of the island between them and forced himself to calm. What the hell was wrong with him? He was acting like a crazy person. He could see the shock and fear on Summer's face and he hated it. Then there was pity and he knew she must have thought something horrible had happened to him while he was gone. She was right, sort of. That horrible thing was her.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out."

Seth popped the bottle top off and took a long, practiced chug of beer. Half of it was gone by the time he was done and he felt himself instantly relax. Alcohol, his old buddy. He placed the bottle on the countertop and sighed. "I'm fine."

Summer was too busy staring at his beer. She didn't respond and he added, "I didn't mean to yell at you."

Summer jerked her head upward and now she looked worried. "It's okay, I was just surprised. I am sorry though."

"Sorry for what?" Seth had already forgotten what they were talking about just a few minutes ago.

"Sorry for everything, I guess."

"Oh, well, that doesn't matter anymore. You don't need to apologize."

"Bullshit." The word came out so blunt that Seth actually felt like he had been physically pushed by the word. "Don't tell me it doesn't matter. It does. It always has."

"Whatever." Seth finished off his beer. He didn't want to talk about this anymore.

"You wouldn't be acting like this if it didn't matter."

No. Just no. He was not going to do this now. If he had his way, he'd never do this. He wasn't about to get into it with Summer, not after days of arguing, yelling, hurting with the people who actually cared about him. He didn't owe Summer a damn thing, he didn't have to hear her out if he didn't want to. "Let's eat!"

"Seth – "

He just powered on, choosing not to acknowledge her objections. "I'm hungry. Are you hungry because I could really go for something to eat right now." He wasn't hungry at all but the takeout containers in the fridge had inspired him.

"Fine." Summer sighed and tapped her fingers along the countertop. "I guess I could go for some food too."

Seth rubbed his hands together and walked over to where the takeout menus were. At least where he thought they would be. When he pulled open the drawer, it was empty. "Uh – "

He heard a drawer open behind him and saw Summer pull out a handful of different menus. A soft smile was on her face and he felt incredibly sheepish. "Ryan and Marissa rearranged the kitchen a bit when your parents moved."

"Of course." Stupid idiot. God, he felt so embarrassed and he wasn't even sure why. It wasn't like it was his fault, he just didn't know. Still, the fact that Summer was smiling so gently at him only made his embarrassment feel more intense.

Seth walked over to stand a bit behind Summer, trying to read over her shoulder as she spread out a bunch of menus across the countertop. "Okay, we've got like three different Thai places, Chinese, Indian, Mexican, you name it, it's probably here."

He was too far away to get a good look at the menus, so he took a step closer. Without even realizing, his hand fell to the small of Summer's back, and he leaned over her shoulder to get a look. He felt the muscles of Summer's back tense and ripple under his hand, but she relaxed almost instantly. Even through her top he could feel the intense heat radiating off her body. His breathing grew ragged for the briefest of seconds, but leveled out. It was such a comfortable, instinctual act that he had touched her without even realizing the act's implications, and now that he was aware of what he'd done, he couldn't stop. If he did, it would be even more obvious that he was bothered by her.

"Um, so I was thinking Thai food. Why mess with a good thing, right?" He didn't mean for the question to come out quiet and husky, his breath gently lapping against her cheek and ear. He felt her shiver and heard her swallow.

"Right. No reason to mess with the classics."

Unconsciously, he moved his head even closer to her ear and said gently, "So what do you want?" Being this close to her was pure hell, but he couldn't pull away.

Summer pushed away from the counter, knocking him back a few steps and causing his hand to leave her back. "Um, actually – actually, I think I'm going to leave." Summer turned to face him, her face flushed a beautiful warm red, her breathing deep. "Yeah, I think I need to go. I'm not that hungry anyway."

"You sure? Because it's not a problem."

"Oooh yeah, I'm sure."

Seth shrugged and started to gather up the menus. If she didn't want to stick around, he wasn't going to make her. He'd already screwed up enough around her, it was a good thing she was leaving. "All right."

Summer didn't move. Seth put the menus away and looked up to find her rooted to the exact spot he'd last seen her in. He had expected her to at least move a little. "Is there something wrong?"

"No, no, I'm good." She still hadn't moved.

"So um, are you going to leave?"

"Right. I was going to leave wasn't I?" She laughed in embarrassment and reluctance. She really didn't seem to want to leave.

"Yes you were." Seth studied her and tried to see inside her head to know what was going on with her. Acting like an idiot was usually his thing. "You know, you're welcome to stay. Honestly. I could use the company." Shut up! What the hell was he saying?

"Well, maybe – no, I need to leave." She finally moved, turning around and walking toward the family room where she had left her stuff.

Seth followed her. "Okay." He watched her grab her purse, and slowly make her way to the front door. "Oh hey, good luck with the whole London thing. I hope it works out for you."

"Yeah, me too." She practically ran out the door after saying that.

When did Summer get so weird?

Preview: When we return, Sandy talks to Seth about his future, Seth gets drunk and talks about his past, Seth and Summer spend more time together, Anna shows up, a surprise character makes an appearance, and Summer does something stupid. Sounds like fun, no?