A/N this is from chapter twelve of the good the bad and the undead but written from Ivy's POV please note that the dialogue between Ivy and Rachel are quotes from the book and just like everything else to do not belong to me so don't sue me please. All selling mistakes/grammatical errors are my fault.

My dear heart had fought well but it was clear she wasn't up to besting me let alone a dead vamp. She was currently on the floor fighting to get her breath back. Moving away from her I pushed the anger away, at least now maybe she'd listen to me and stay away from Trent. Walking away slowly I put an extra little swing in my walk hoping to draw her attention to my ass. I needed her to start thinking of me the way I thought about her.

The weight of Rachel on my back shocked a cry from my lips and for a split second I thought she wanted me. The redwood scent of my dear heart enveloped me and my heart sang. Then her arm came round my throat pulling me too her in a parody of a lovers embrace and I realised she was trying to continue our fight. Hope died in my chest and all I could taste was ashes she was mine damn it we where made for each other. I started to back peddle, intending to slam her into the wall, pin her there and take her. But she dropped to the floor, tripping me, she was on me smothering me in her scent - her love. We grappled till I broke her hold and she scrambled backwards. I could feel the monster inside me growing stronger I could protect others from it but we both wanted Rachel. I want her, she's mine, my dear heart I stand waiting as she gets to her feet -fast but I'm faster.

Waving her arms she announces her surrender. She was mine I could smell her love for me I wanted her, Piscary wanted me to have her. I wasn't ready to stop just yet she had to learn. My feet light I circled my dear heart. "That's the trouble with you Rachel" my voice echoed and I worked to keep the hurt out of it. "You always quit when it starts to get good. You're a tease nothing but a god damn tease." "Excuse me?" anger cold and blinding fills me how dare she pretend she doesn't know what I mean. Lunging for her I attack she blocks my fists and manages to drive me back with a kick to my knees again she tries to end things and I shake my head.

She had to be made to understand I couldn't lose her. "I'm trying to save your life little witch. A big bad vamp isn't going to stop because you tell him to." Piscary won't "he's going to keep coming till he gets what he wants or you drive him away. I'm going to save your life one way or another." please dear heart please show me you can drive him away I don't want to be a monster with you I don't want to make you mine like this. Then the monster was there whispering to me "does it really matter how really she'll be safe and she'll be ours isn't that what counts?"

Darting forward I attack, she forces me to retreat again, attack, retreat, attack my beautiful dear heart, my little mouse. Her fear was rising mixing with our scent increasing my bloodlust but I could control it a little longer. "Stop ivy were done" turning her back on me she begins to walk back to the hall. She still hadn't learnt she still didn't understand, I wavered the monster raging at me to claim and protect her. To let her go or push? Her movement stirred the air and the smell of my pure witch mixed with me and her fear hit me full force. I attacked, easily gaining control of her till her head slammed in to my chin. Dropping my grip I stumbled back the taste of blood heavy in my mouth it was mine, soon it would be my dear hearts blood. "First blood Rachel?" I lunged for her, gripping the front of her shoulder I throw her to the front of the church. Walking over I pick my dear heart off the floor, god the feel of her skin was incredible "come on witch I taught you better. You're not even trying" I kept my voice gentle with the love I felt.

"I don't want to hurt you" she whimpers to me under the shadow of the long gone cross. My dear heart worries about hurting me? - hasn't she learnt it's only her pushing me away that hurts. "You can't" I'm sorry dear heart. Her heart pounds franticly like a rabbits its beat calling to me with promises of everything I had ever wanted. "Let me go Ivy" her voice was breathy, a lovers plea "if you do this I'll leave. You'll be alone." leaning close I drew the scent of her to me "if I do this you won't leave." and you'll be alive and safe dear heart "but you could get away if you really wanted to. What do you think I've been teaching you the last three months? Do you want to get away Rachel?" tell me no, give this to me dear heart please. Her adrenaline driven heart was sending more of the most delectable scent into the air, I could feel myself pumping out more pheromones in response. Maybe this was how my dear heart needed it to be. "Do you want to get away little witch?" nuzzling into her skin I await her answer.

Her arousal soars and I begin playing on her scar, I can make this good for my dear heart "get off" her words hurt but givens Piscary's orders they only matter if she can "make me". I want her and I can smell that she wants me but if she can fight me off then I won't have to bind her we can find another way. Images of ours lives becoming more intertwined of us in her shower and in my bed fill my mind. My voice turns playful "tell me it doesn't feel good when I do this" sighing I run my finger down her elegant neck watching her eyes - watching her will. Her knees shake and I ready myself to catch my dear heart. Her eyes slipping shut she gives into the pleasure "yes" she moans the sound one I have yearned to hear for so long "god help me it does. Please ... Stop" I can't anymore dear heart I can't. "I know how it feel" I tell her she whimpers my name the sound going straight to my clit, I needed her to say my name like that again. Instead she tells me to stop that she doesn't want me, pain oh god it hurts how can she hurt me so? I'm still not good enough for my dear heart. She opens her eyes and stares into my soul my dear heart has judged me and found me wanting. Her body wants me and she can't fight me let alone an undead. My forehead smacks against the wall next to her. I try to gather my resolve she has to understand I have to save her, Rachel alive and bound to me is better then Rachel dead or god forbid alive and Piscary's toy. I don't have a choice neither of us do anymore, a demon and a vampire took our choices away.

"You don't know what it's been like living besides you Rachel" I whisper begging my dear heart to understand to forgive me. "I knew you'd be frightened if you knew how vulnerable your scar makes you. You've been marked for pleasure, and unless you have a vampire to claim and protect you, they all will take advantage of it, taking what they want and passing you to the next until you're nothing but s puppet begging to bled. I was hoping you might be able to say no. That if I taught you enough you would be able to drive a hungry vampire away. But you can't, dear heart. The neurotoxins have soaked in too far. It's not your fault. I'm sorry..." the only thing I can do is make this feel good for you. Pumping out more pheromones to relax her I soften my voice as I try to explain before the scent of her overcomes me completely "Piscary said this is the only way to keep you. To keep you alive." I don't want it to be. "I would be kind Rachel. I wouldn't ask anything you didn't want to give." no matter how much I might want to "you wouldn't be like those shadows at Piscary's, but strong, an equal. He showed me when he spelled you it wouldn't hurt." I'll never hurt you dear heart. "The demon already broke you. The pain is over. It will never hurt again. He said you would respond, and my god, Rachel, you did. It's as if a master broke you. And you're mine." my body and monster both rejoiced at those three words - she was mine.

Softly I reminded her of her response at Piscary's to her own finger sliding across her neck and begged her "imagine what it's like when it's not your finger but my teeth - slicing clean and pure through you"

Her body went slack and my grip was all that kept her upright in the face of her need. My dear heart was crying, I kissed her beautiful neck as I begged her to stop and I felt the rush of desire my lips caused her. Hopes of never having to be alone again, of never having to smell that undeserving rat on her again filled me. "I don't want it to be like this, either but for you, I'd break my fast." A soft moan of want crosses her lips and again I rejoice "Ivy" god the sound of her voice saying my name like that. "Wait" we where so close my dear heart and I, pulling back I wait, always waiting for my dear one. "No" oh god, oh god, Rachel, dear heart "no?" nothing had ever hurt this much before. She was saying it again spitting on my love I felt my heart crack I couldn't understand why I couldn't see the stake, she had to have staked me for it to hurt this bad. The monster rose to the front I couldn't, didn't want to fight it my finger traced her scar as I told her I didn't think she meant it. As I pulled her closer she shrieked my name, fighting me, keeping her neck from me but she was mine the monster knew it her muscles began to shake, soon, soon she'd be mine always.

The pain loosened my fingers and my consciousness turned slowly black as I looked at my dear heart her look of bewilderment matching my own. I had failed her.