So Christmas came and went, and Kowalski and Anna were not destined for a few weeks. That is, until February, after Anna was sixteen.
Sweet sixteen and never been kissed, she thought then, but then she remembered who she wanted to kiss, and didn't say a thing.
But Valentines day was approaching, fast. And Anna was always nervous around that time of year. Boys seemed to go a little crazy; even your friends could turn into "your valentine". Girls went a little giggle-happy, but if you kept a calm head, things usually worked out just fine.
So on Valentines Day, when Anna received a flower on her bunk, she was surprised and confused. The only boys she really talked to much were the penguins, and she was sure they were too strictly duty-bound. It was a single, yet beautiful, daisy. My favorite flower, she realized, as she picked it up.
A small note card attached read: My hope for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to. I just hope you wish we could be together. I know I do.
Sincerely,
Your Secret Admirer.
Anna frowned. She had never seen that handwriting before, and didn't know who could have sent it. She knew who she wished had sent it, but she could never work up the guts to ask Kowalski. So she did the only thing she knew how to do; since Millie would just settle into a defensive stance, and the boys would laugh, she ran to Marlene.
"A Valentines card?" Marlene cried, leaping out of her chair. "From who?"
"It doesn't say," Anna said, handing her the flower. "It just says 'Your Secret Admirer'."
"Well, Anna, you do realize what we have to do, right?"
"No, what?" Anna asked, taking the flower back from Marlene and rubbing it against her beak absentmindedly.
"We have to find out who did it." Marlene said, sounding like Skipper for a crazy second.
"No way!" Anna spluttered. "He obviously doesn't want me to know."
"That is what he wants you to think," Marlene said. "First off; the boys next door!"
"Ugh, Marlene!" Anna groaned, but allowed herself to be drug back to the H.Q.
"A Valentines day card?" Skipper said, rising from his chair. "Who sent it?"
"We don't know," Marlene said, speaking for Anna in her embarrassment. "In fact, we were wondering if one of your men had done it."
"My men? Of course not, Marlene! Get some sense into your head!"
But Anna had secretly watched Kowalski's face, and she had seen the color drain away when they had come in, Anna smelling the flower to hide her reddening face. She had seen Kowalski's eyes light up when she had said 'and whoever it was really knew me; they gave me my favorite flower'. And she had seen his face burn with shame when Skipper had proclaimed that last bit, and Anna knew who it was.
But then, perhaps, she didn't. Maybe she had simply wanted to see those results, maybe it was an illusion, a trick of the light.
"Ok ok, geeze, calm down!" Marlene said, "Now we're going to go ask Fred the Squirrel."
Skipper choked on his coffee. "I suppose Anna is ok with this plan, Marlene?"
Anna, who was behind Marlene, began shaking her head and making the 'cut' motion over her throat. But Marlene whipped her head around, and Anna stopped comically, and started smiling and nodding.
"Of course she is!" Marlene said, turning to leave. "Come on, Anna. Let's go."
"Save me!" Anna mouthed to the boys, as Marlene drug her out of the room.
A days worth of aggravation later, Anna and Marlene gave up. Marlene was heading to go to the Valentines Day bash, along with Skipper, Private, Rico and the lemurs, but Kowalski wasn't going. Anna saw no reason to go, and she wasn't feeling too good anyway, she told herself.
So, feeling both elated and upset that she still didn't know who had left the flower and note, Anna trudged home to the H.Q.
Kowalski was sitting outside on the deck, staring at the water, with his back to her.
It's Kowalski! Anna almost choked with excitement. He's alone. Now work up the guts to ask him. You never know until you try, do you?
I can't believe I'm doing this.
"Hey, Kowalski." Anna said casually, walking towards him. She was extremely relieved that her voice wasn't shaking.
He spun around, and stood. "Oh, hey, Anna, um…I just remembered that I left the, uh, atomic fusion manipulator on…I should probably go turn that off…" and he sidled towards the fish bowl.
He's leaving! Anna panicked. Just ask him, for God's sake!
"Wait, Kowalski," Anna said, sighing a little.
He turned back around again. Anna looked at him with a look that made him explode with love inside. But it had to stay inside, he thought, as he opened his mouth. "Anna?"
She sighed, closed her eyes, and started the longest speech of her life. "I was…well…you see…I noticed that you've been avoiding me these past few days. And especially today. I was thinking that it might possibly be because you left me the Valentines note? And you didn't want me to find out…?" She rushed through it all, feeling stupid and watching the expression on his face.
His ice-blue eyes widened, and he walked a few steps towards her. "Would it be so bad if…if I did?"
Anna looked up at him, and realized that that was his way of confessing. "No," she whispered, "it wouldn't be so bad at all."
He stared at her for a minute, and then he beamed. The music from the party across the pathway was drifting over to them; it was 'We Never Change' by Coldplay. Apparently Julian had commandeered a Coldplay CD from the lost'n'found. "Then call me Johnny Lovebird," he joked, and realized with a pang of embarrassment that that comment didn't sound as witty as it had in his head.
Anna laughed, and looked at the ground, as Kowalski spoke again. "Just don't tell the others, especially Skipper."
"Why not?" Anna asked, sounding a little injured.
"Because Skipper wasn't a big fan of our dance number a few weeks back," Kowalski said, hoping she understood.
"Oh, I get it." She smiled, "He doesn't like the thought of his 'trained professionals' falling for anyone?"
"That is the general gist, yes." Kowalski replied, smirking a bit himself. "But you know, it's still Valentines Day."
Anna felt a sudden burst of bravery, and draped her arms around his neck. "So shenanigans like this are aloud?"
Kowalski felt his heart stop. "Um…y-yes, I suppose…"
And Anna smiled, and leaned her head against his chest. "Good." She sighed, and he wrapped his arms around her and they swayed to the music they could still hear from next door, both feeling comfort in each others arms.
The love songs playing on the boom box were making Rico sick, so Skipper was walking away from the crowd with his weapons expert.
"Now, breathe, Rico." He said. "Ignore the extremely gushy-love mush music, and try to get your head straight."
But Rico suddenly went mad, jumping up and down and pointing over Skipper's shoulder. "Egh gah agh!" he chanted quickly, seeming to be trying to say something important.
"Get it together, man!" Skipper yelled, and Rico spun him around.
From their vantage point near Julian's throne, they could see nearly everything. Especially the penguin habitat, and two young penguins dancing in silence.
Skipper gasped, and reared back. "But…but…" And then the anger set in. "Unbelievable! I just told that soldier not four weeks ago…" He started storming down to set this straight, when Marlene stopped him.
"What's up, Skip?" She asked him, sensing the anger rolling off of him.
"Take a look for yourself, Marlene! Kowalski is disobeying a direct order!" Skipper said ferociously, and Marlene turned around.
"Aww…!" she gushed, smiling romantically, clasping her hands together. "How sweet!"
"No. Not sweet!" Skipper said, "Unruly! Ridiculous!"
"Now, Skipper, don't you dare go down there and break them up!" Marlene said, snapping into the present with a jolt. "Anna and Kowalski are obviously in love."
"And that, Marlene, happens to be exactly why I have to break them up."
"No, Skipper, and I won't let you."
Anna was in heaven. The music was soft, and slow. Kowalski was dancing with her, on Valentine's Day, and they were apparently more than friends now.
Finally! It has almost been a year…
But then the music type changed, and Anna and Kowalski both laughed when the punk-rock love song came on, and they were still dancing to Coldplay's beat.
"I think our song is over," Kowalski said, pulling back from her to look into her eyes.
We have a song? Anna knew that she was going to be hard to pull herself into the present for several days. That comment already had her slightly disconnected. "Yea, I think it is."
And then they both noticed Skipper and Marlene, fighting, as they approached the habitat. They hadn't yet noticed them dancing; or so they thought.
"We'd better go," Anna noted, and Kowalski nodded.
But something in him couldn't let her walk away just yet. "Anna." He said, not knowing exactly what he was going to do, even as he called her name.
"Yes?" She turned, before disappearing into the H.Q.
Kowalski suddenly gripped her shoulders, slowly pulled her in, and kissed her. It lasted all of two seconds, but Anna and Kowalski suddenly had no concept of time. All that mattered was that for the first time in their lives, they were forgetting science and allowing their hearts to tell them what was right and what was wrong.
Anna broke away, feeling dizzy. What just happened? Her stunned brain couldn't seem to think of anything to say. Even silence seemed to be to much for her all of a sudden, because she laughed a tiny bit.
"No matter what Skipper tells me," Kowalski said, devoted to Anna completely. "I…love you, Anna." For the first time ever saying those words, Kowalski knew he would get used to them quickly.
"I love you too, Kowalski," Anna said, softly, and then Skipper's words could be heard. They both turned to look, and when Kowalski looked back at the spot where Anna had been a nanosecond later, he realized that she was already gone.
Anna hit the floor of the H.Q. with a light thump, and scrambled to get to her feet. "I need to get away from here," she realized, still trying to pull her wits back together after what had happened. "If Skipper finds me here and Kowalski up there, two and two make four…" she whispered to herself, and then she remembered the sewers. "I know! I'll use the sewers to get to Marlene's, she won't mind, and I'll hide out there for a few hours."
As she mumbled, she flipped the manhole cover up and climbed down the hatch ladder.
In fact, Anna was still so dizzy from her first kiss, she slipped down three rungs and landed on the concrete with a bump. She didn't even notice the pain as she stumbled up and kept running down the dark pathway.
How far is it to Marlene's? She wasn't sure. Every other time, she had had the boys leading her…
And Kowalski…
A near stumble into the sewage made her truly wake up. Come on, Anna! Pay attention!
Isn't that Marlene's sewer cap above my head?
Meanwhile, Kowalski realized that Skipper must have seen them dancing. I have to get away! He realized, and dove into the water.
Hopefully I can hold my breath long enough to make him think I was never here…but probably not. How can I explain away what he might have seen? If Skipper realizes that I can't obey the direct order to stay away from Anna, he might make them leave. Or us. What do I do?
Funny, Kowalski thought, I can come up with options to get out of a potentially life-threatening situation in 3.9847 seconds, but when it comes to love…
He swam down as deep as he could, and tried to hide beneath the circular window lip as best as possible. It was difficult, since about half of him was still visible, but he did his best. It was all he had to work with.
Above him, he could hear Skipper stomping around, obviously frustrated. And then was the feminine slur that was Marlene's voice, and then an angry shout from Skipper.
And that was when a large, glowing light sliced through the water, nearly grazing Kowalski's shoulder as it passed and bounced off the bottom of the pool. He recoiled in shock; it was a flare. Skipper knew he was down there, and he was desperate for an answer to his call.
Mustering up his courage, Kowalski promised himself that no matter what happened, no matter what was said, he wouldn't deny Anna. It had to be done eventually; Skipper had to realize that Kowalski had strong feelings for Anna and that was that.
He burst up onto the platform, and Skipper turned on him.
"Kowalski! Explain yourself!"
Kowalski looked his commander in his eyes. "I love her, Skipper."
"Excuse me?" Skipper asked, who sounded disbelieving.
"I love Anna, and nothing you say can make me change my mind." Kowalski spoke proudly, and saw Marlene give him a thumbs up on her way back to the habitat. Then she mouthed something he could barely read.
It was; Where's Anna?
He tipped his head down towards the H.Q., almost imperceptibly, and she nodded and walked off.
"I don't really care what you think, Kowalski," Skipper says, shattering his momentary silence. "I think that would have been clear after several years of working with me. You can think whatever you want; it's what you do that bothers me. I cannot, will not, allow you to become involved in love."
"Skipper, with all due respect…no. I love Anna, and I intend to show it. You can command me during our missions, and tell me to do whatever you want concerning our job and common interest, but as for anything else, I'm practically a grown up. I can take care of myself, and Anna." Kowalski had never felt so sure of himself before in his life.
Skipper was shocked into silence. Maybe Kowalski isn't as young as I thought, after all. "…ok."
Kowalski nearly fell over with shock. I must have heard that wrong, he thought. "What?"
"Ok." Skipper shrugged. "You can do what you wish, just…be careful. I can't afford to find another options guy."
Kowalski grinned. "Thank you, Skipper. Besides, it's Anna."
Skipper laughed a little, tensely, but still. "I guess that's right. Never mind."
As Marlene stepped into her habitat, she was shocked when she saw Anna, half-crying, half-laughing, in the corner. "Anna! What's wrong?"
Anna jumped. "Oh, h-hey Marlene. Nothing's wrong."
Marlene ran over to her. "Then why are you crying?"
"Because…oh…I kissed Kowalski!" Anna confessed, burying her face in her hands.
Marlene's eyes widened. "Well, congratulations! Why are you crying?"
"Because…because…I shouldn't have!"
"But, why? You love him, he loves you…what's wrong with that?" Marlene wrapped an arm around the young penguin.
"I shouldn't get him involved with me. He deserves someone amazing, and perfect, and someone who isn't waiting around to get back on the fast track towards death." Anna said, hiccupping a bit.
"Oh, Anna!" Marlene said, laughing a little. "Kowalski loves you. Not someone else, you. Evidently you're perfect enough for him. And about your cancer…well, he knows about it. And who did he kiss?"
"Me." Anna smiled a bit. "He kissed me. He said he loved me."
"He WHAT?" Millie burst into the room. "POINDEXTER DID WHAT?"
Marlene and Anna both burst out laughing.
"Oh, Millie," Anna said, wiping away her tears. "Don't call him that."
"But you should have heard him defending you to Skipper." Marlene said, turning back to Anna, "It was the sweetest thing ever."
"Oh, did he get in trouble?" Anna cried, jumping to her feet. "I should go and get in trouble too. It is my fault as well as his." She started walking towards the sewer cover again, and Millie jumped up too.
"I should go with you." Millie said, trying to follow her.
"You should stay here," Anna said, smiling, as she pushed Millie back into the middle of the room.
Marlene nodded. "You forget how old Anna is now, Millie. She can take care of herself."
Millie sat on the floor, staring at the spot where her sister had been. She was used to standing up for Anna; when Anna had been sick, kids had made fun. Anna was too shy to stand up for herself, so her twin had. It was a role that they had both conformed to over the years. It was normal, natural. It had shaped their characters with clarity.
But now, she realized that she didn't have to take of her twin anymore. Anna was sixteen. She could take care of herself, surely?
"Ok, I guess you're right." Millie said slowly, picking herself up off the floor.
Anna arrived on the scene moments after the last words had been said. Before her confidence drained away, Anna started to talk to Skipper. "It isn't just Kowalski's fault; its mine too. Don't blame him, Skipper. I'm sorry, but I have to say it; you can't make me stop loving him."
Skipper felt something between anger and humor. Is today national stand up to Skipper day? First Marlene, then Kowalski, now (of all people) Anna? "It's ok, Anna." He said, allowing his anger to fade away. "Kowalski and I already sorted it out, and you two are free to be 'in love'."
Anna smiled, turned to Kowalski, and rolled her eyes as if to say 'Well, nothing was stopping that either way'. And he winked at her as if to say 'We know that, but he doesn't', and wrapped an arm around her shoulder.
Skipper had to admit, they did make a pretty nice couple.
Anna allowed her heart to race ahead of her mind as she leaned against her new, she hardly dared think it, boyfriend. I must be dreaming, she thought.
Kowalski simply lead her away, across the street, towards the party where the music was still playing.
