A/N: And the conclusion. Sorry it took so long. Lots of tests. Also, I forgot to put a disclaimer in. I don't own any of the characters of plot lines that are from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Jean-Luc lay on his back in his bed, staring up at the ceiling. The Borg Queen's voice still echoed through his mind. Her taunting as he watched thousands of men and women perish under his hand. Good people; dedicated Starfleet officers giving up their lives to protect Earth and free will. The images of broken ships and broken bodies floated through his mind. However, now there was another vision dominating the storm in his mind.
As soon as the door slid shut behind them, his lips found hers again, wrapping her in a tight embrace. Her fingers pulled at the fastenings of his clothing; he successfully slipped her out of her uniform top, pausing in his kisses only to pull the blue piece of material over her head. The bare skin exposed made them both shiver, she from the cool air, he from the anticipation. His trembling fingers traced the scar on her face and he kissed her bruised neck delicately; his tongue traced the tender area.
His hands. His fingers. They had touched her there before, only to do harm instead of pleasure. Or was it pleasure? Had the Borg taken pleasure out of her pain? Jean-Luc still had no idea what made Locutus stop strangling her. His pleading before had done no good- the Borg still fired on the Enterprise and all the other Federations ships without heeding his pathetic attempt to stop them. However, when he begged for Beverly's life, Locutus had stopped, they had all stopped. There had never been fear in her eyes, just pain; never once had she feared for her life, because she had trusted him. Unyielding trust.
Their bodies fought to be touched, to be closer. There was no material between them; how they had made it to his bed was a wonder in itself. Not more of a wonder than her body. He could see her slender figure beneath his on the wall- shadows illuminated by the stars outside his window. His hands caressed her long, toned legs; the shape of her breasts molded to his hands. Her own kisses to his chest and the way she trailed her nails down to his well equipped hips sent chills of excitement through his body. They longed to be one; to be one shadow on that wall.
The shadows. He had seen the thousands of assimilated beings in the shadows of the ship. The shadow the enormous cube caused when it appeared next the fleet. There had been dark shadows in William Riker's eyes as he gave the order to fire. His Number One- the man, the crew, he had dedicated his life to and trusted with that same life- had given the order knowing it would be what he wanted. Of course, you can't have shadows without the light, otherwise all that would be left is darkness…Beverly had been that light. Ever steady. Never yielding. Light.
Her soft whispers and moans of pleasure filled his ears and mind, wrapping him in an ecstasy he had never experienced before. It felt so right being there within her. She needed him, wanted him, trembled beneath his touch, gasped in the pleasure of being with him. Their hips rocked in unison, creating the high they both desired to reach. And reach it they did. She cried out his name in her emotional state.
"Jean-Luc!"
"Jean-Luc?" Beverly's sleepy voice startled him. Jean-Luc had not been aware she was awake. "Are you alright?" Her head had been resting on his chest and she tilted it up with concerned eyes. Gently, she reached up and wiped away his tears; tears he had not even known had fallen.
"Did I wake you?" He took her hand, pressing a kiss to her palm.
"No…I felt your heartbeat speed up. Plus, I'm a light sleeper. Comes with the occupation," she grinned, snuggling back into his side. Her head went back down to his bare chest, a hand reached to be intertwined with his own, a leg slipped between his. A calmness swept over him; he was safe in her embrace.
"My heartbeat woke you?" A small chuckled came from her lips.
"I fell asleep to the rhythm. And the rhythm changed. Don't ask about my logic…" With the hand she held, she stroked her thumb against his skin. "You were thinking about the Borg, weren't you?" Jean-Luc was glad that she had not looked up at him again.
"Yes." There was no point in lying, she would be able to tell. He was saved by the clock chiming 0700 hours. "Don't you have shift to go to?" Beverly sighed, but he wasn't sure if it was about the time or the fact he had avoided her question. She sat up, exposing her bare back, searching for her uniform across the room. Once she spotted it, she crawled out of bed, snatched up her communicator and leapt back into bed. Seeing his confused look, she grinned and tapped the pin.
"Crusher to Dr. Selar."
"Selar here."
"Doctor, is there any way for you to cover my shift this morning? I need to stay with Captain Picard. I'll be in his quarters if you need anything."
"Not a problem."
"Thank you, I owe you one." Jean-Luc stared incredulously at her. "What?"
"That's it? That's all you have to do?" She giggled at his flabbergasted reaction.
"Well, sir, I am doing my job. As Chief Medical Officer, it is my duty to oversee the health of the Captain after such a trying ordeal. As far as Selar knows I'm actually on duty." She threw one leg over him so she was straddling his lap. She pulled him into a long kiss.
"Perks of the job?" he chuckled. "If I told Riker to cover my shift because I need to stay with my Doctor in her quarters, he would have a field day." They both laughed at the thought of the look on Will's face if Jean-Luc had used her as an excuse for taking some time off. The moment soon ended as a serious look crossed her features.
"You never really answered my question, Jean-Luc." This time blue met hazel as she stared intently. He ran his hands over her arms, contemplating the question. After a few moments, he sighed, finally giving in.
"I can't get the images out of my head. I saw everything, Beverly. Everything Locutus and the Borg did. It isn't just the helpless feeling that I couldn't do anything…it's that I did it. Moreover, people are willing to forgive me," he muttered, as if disgusted by the thought. "I gave the Borg all the information they needed to destroy not only the Federation, but Earth itself. I did that. And yet, you're willing to love me anyway."
"Jean-Luc, if it had been any other man, say Will for example, would you have granted them the faith and forgiveness they have shown you?" He blinked, as if the thought had never occurred to him.
"Yes."
"They are only paying you the same respect," said Beverly. Leaning in, she added, "As for me being willing to love you…I've loved you much too long to let the Borg come between us. If I did, they would win. They can't understand love, Jean-Luc, but we can. You can. That's what makes you human."
Human. That's what makes you human. Locutus was not human. Captain Jean-Luc Picard was human. Because he loved. Love is irrelevant. But why was irrelevant? Because the Collective doesn't understand it? It is a human emotion, but Captain Picard is a part of your collective and so are his feelings. Most of them you have been able to override, but in a sense, the power of love is stronger than what you think. The power of love. Yes, he loved Beverly Crusher with every entity of his being. But there was a greater love of family still. Captain Picard is ours. Why would they care that much about him? He was trying to kill them. Mr. Worf. Fire. But he loved. Loved them all. It saved them…his love saved them. It was the grace of love that spared my life, Jean-Luc. Your pure love.
"I can love," he stated rather loudly, like a child figuring out the concept for the first time. "I can love you," he said more tenderly, running a finger through her red hair. He reached up to kiss her, taking the woman he loved into his arms. It would take time to heal what the Borg had done to him. But right now, he could love…he had the best of one world…the best of the human world. Jean-Luc Picard could love Beverly Crusher. And that made all the difference in the world.
