Chapter III – Shattered Hearts
Sakura had woken in Kakashi's bed that morning. She'd gotten up and gone out in the living room, found his fast asleep on the couch, an Icha Icha book on his chest, fully dressed, without a pillow or blanket. He probably did that often, falling asleep like that.
Unwilling to wake him before dawn again, she'd wandered to the bathroom and taken a shower before making tea. The man didn't have coffee in his house. Blasphemy. He'd woken up to her clattering around the kitchen. After tea, she warned him about telling Tsunade of the poison and left his apartment for her own where she'd changed for work and eaten breakfast. The rest of the morning, she'd spent at work, back to her regular shift in the ER since Shizune had also returned from her mission the previous day.
Everything had been normal, almost too normal. Well, aside from the strange feeling in Sakura's gut. She had chalked it up to spending so much time with Kakashi and gotten on with her duties.
At noon, all hell broke loose.
Suddenly, in one piercing moment, the world came almost to an end.
An agonized scream tore from Sakura's mouth as her knees rose from the ground, body full intent on moving, running, but half her heart and half her brain told her to stop and stay. She felt torn in half, ripped apart by the seams as her cold fingers clutched Tsunade's shoulders in a death grip and terrified greens looked helplessly on as Kakashi went sailing through the air and crashed into a wall, slumping on the ground, unmoving.
The man who'd kicked him, one of Pein's bodies, stood a few feet away no expression at all on his face, just staring at Kakashi, as if daring the Copy Ninja to stand back up and attack him again. But the sliver-haired man lay motionless, both eyes closed, mouth scrunched up in pain, and Sakura's medical mind screamed that he would never stand again if she doesn't help him now.
Nevertheless, she still couldn't move, she could only watch, completely helpless and halfway disgusted with herself. How many times has Tsunade drilled into her to leave her emotions off the battlefield? That a medic is useless if their sense of duty is hindered by their emotions? Yet Sakura simply couldn't abandon her mentor and Hokage, her mother, just like that, she felt as if her heart would shatter completely if she did it and lost Tsunade.
But what if you lose Kakashi? Inner Sakura whispered, just as torn as her mental roommate, but the majority of her fear centered on Kakashi.
"Kakashi..." Sakura whispered, her voice breaking as tears sprung up in her eyes, the heart of the loving, adoring daughter and the heart of a girl hopelessly and completely in love warring against each other, both equally strong.
Then Pein's body moved again, slowly, his eyes trained on the Copy Ninja, intent of finishing his helpless opponent off. That almost did it for Sakura, and she started slipping Tsunade off her lap as a black shadow flew over her and something collided with the approaching enemy. Whipping her head in the direction, she saw a black and white lion-like creature wrestling with puppet of flesh and blood. And there was Sai, brush and scroll in hands as he drew more and more ink creatures, keeping the body busy.
When twenty lions surrounded Kakashi's former opponent, Sai seemed satisfied and turned his dark gaze to her. The black depth of his eyes seemed almost accusing of her. "What are you waiting for, Sakura? Why aren't you helping Kakashi?"
Unable to look into those endless black depths, she lowered her eyes to Tsunade's pale features and trembled. "But, shishou... I can't just leave her..."
As if on cue, the frail body in her embrace shifted and dim, pained amber eyes looked at tear-filled emeralds. "It's okay, Sakura," the blond Hokage whispered weakly. "Go on, tend to him. I'll be alright."
Still uncertain but somewhat glad that Tsunade was stubborn enough to send her away, Sakura slowly stood, keeping a wary eye on the body fighting the painted lions off, and moved to Kakashi. At first glance, Kakashi looked unharmed, as if his only injury was the hit on the head from the collision with the concrete wall. However, she knew better. If there was one thing that the Copy Ninja was in battle than it was reckless. Almost unthinkable from the always cool and composed resident pervert of Konoha, but when things tended to get out of hand and when an opponent was over-powering him, Kakashi often threw caution to the wind and drained himself, overusing the sharingan. Somehow, this seemed like a déjà-vu… But she shook it off and concentrated on the injuries she had to heal.
Taking a deep breath she pushed her chakra into his body, assessing the damage and grimacing, he'd sustained more injury than she'd originally thought. He had a sound concussion, a shattered shoulder blade, three fractured ribs, a partially collapsed lung, broken collarbone and not to mention the massive chakra-drain from the sharingan. Said eye was bleeding slowly from beneath the scarred lid. He has finally managed to almost destroy himself.
Steeling herself against the panic of seeing him like that she concentrated all her chakra reserves in her hands and pressed them to his chest, beginning the long and tedious healing process. She mended his ribs first, followed by the lung, then the shoulder and collarbone, when he could breathe more easily; she healed the wound on the back of his head and started working on his eye. She cleared the chakra clogging the optic nerves, stopping the bleeding and eased the doubtlessly killing headache he'd acquired. When his grimace of pain disappeared, she breathed easier and went to fill his pathways with her chakra. But she couldn't. She'd been fighting alongside her shishou for the majority of the day and had spent a lot of chakra when Tsunade had collapsed, trying to heal the older woman enough so that she didn't have to use her Creation Rebirth, as it would only drain her more. And now after healing the extensive injury on Kakashi she was almost drained herself. She only had a small bit of chakra left, nowhere near enough to stimulate Kakashi's own flow to become faster.
Knowing what she had to do if she wanted Kakashi to live, she forced herself not to think of the scolding she was going to get from both the Copy Ninja and Tsunade and forced her last bit of energy towards her forehead. Making the three seals necessary, she concentrated and activated the seal on her forehead. Her chakra glowed blue and formed a diamond on her skin, identical to the one on Tsunade's face. Her own version of the Creation Rebirth worked similar to Tsunade's, yet differently. Less dangerous for the body, but draining all the same. However, she'd had the Hidden Seal for three years and had not once used it, there must be enough chakra in there to heal the whole village, she'd stored daily as much as she could.
Exhaling loudly she pushed the seal completely open and grimaced; it was a painful process. Concentrating she formed the tiger seal, and two incarnate designs started glowing just below her shoulders, the horse followed and activated the next set of chakra seals, on her elbows, the rat opened the ones on her wrists. By then the pain had vanished and she felt herself thrumming with energy. Only six of the twelve seals were open and she felt she could punch all of Pein's bodies into outer space if he got too close to her. Calming the exhilarating feel of power she formed the bird and set off the seals on her thighs, with the monkey she activated the ones on her knees and finally the dog completed the process with seals around her ankles.
Black markings shot out of the seal on her forehead and spread over her cheeks and neck, her eyes glowed even greener with the chakra flow and her hair stood almost on ends. She radiated energy and power.
But it wouldn't last long, Creation Rebirth boosted her chakra levels and gave her more power than humanly possible for about twenty minutes, before it drained completely from her body and left her healed but utterly exhausted. Setting to work immediately she pushed as much chakra as Kakashi's body could handle into his flow and watched with enhanced eyes as it began to flow and rebuild the cells he'd lost, stimulating his pathways and soon his own chakra started flowing again. He was out of life danger.
Knowing that the power would leave her sooner rather than later, Sakura jumped up and went straight for Pein's body, engaged in a bloody fight with Sai. Bypassing the artist as he went flying, she drew chakra to her fist and lunged. One solid hit, Inner Sakura muttered as she flew directly into the body's personal space and struck before it had the time to react. Her fist made contact with the body's chin and she heard the satisfying cracks as she broke his entire face apart and this time it was the enemy that took a flight. He crashed into the dead form of the large summoned creature she and Tsunade had taken down earlier and didn't stand up again. He wouldn't, ever.
Drawing a deep breath, she run to Sai and healed the largest of his injuries as fast as possible before hastening to Tsunade again and pouring the rest of her chakra into her mentor. She only needed to stabilize her and Tsunade's body would heal with time. A medic's self-healing abilities were remarkable, even without a jutsu like Creation Rebirth.
A few minutes later, fatigue set in and she felt the chakra draining from her body, her system slowly shutting down as it prepared for restoration. The only conscious thought, before deep sleep claimed her was, Please be okay, Naruto.
Sakura woke up feeling disoriented and groggy, and for a while simply lay there staring at the ceiling. Then it dawned on her that she'd passed out on the street, between the broken remains of the Hokage Tower and the hospital.
Gathering her strength, she blinked a few times, to stave off the beginning of nausea and sat up slowly, careful not to strain her aching muscles too much. When she could concentrate on something else beside her burning limbs and the horrible headache beating against her temples, she looked around and realized that she was lying in what looked like a huge tent.
Beds and small tables lined up throughout the space and she saw that most were occupied, figuring this was a medical tent set up, seeing as their hospital was only a pile of rubble.
Movement to her right caught her attention and she turned, seeing Kakashi on the bed beside hers, propped up against two pillows, reading his book. 'Well, some things never change,' she thought dryly, but then smiled, 'and they never should.'
Kakashi lifted his gaze from the text and met her slightly disoriented greens with somber mismatched eyes. The happy curve in them and the small smile she hinted beneath his mask belied his mood.
"Yo," he greeted her amiably and she smiled wider, glad that he seemed alright.
"Hey," she croaked before coughing and taking a plastic cup of water he'd grabbed from the table between them. How long had she been out?
She drank the cup empty before giving a happy sigh and returning it to its previous place. Kakashi chuckled softly. "Better?" was his amused question as she leaned back comfortably.
"Much," she supplied, looking at him again. He looked tired, haggard, and above all sad. "What's wrong, Kaka-sensei?" she teased, attempting to brighten his mood. "If we're here and not dead, I assume we won. So, why so gloomy?"
He regarded her solemnly for a long moment, before giving a soft sigh and staring ahead, his eyes glazed.
"We did win," he finally said. "But at the price of a destroyed village, our Hokage out of commission and most of our military force laying in this same tent. Some injured beyond healing. I'm not sure if it's worth it."
"Hmm..." she murmured, not feeling up to arguing with him over the topic. In her books, a win was always better than a loss. But if only the half of the winners was alive, their leader out of the picture and their home almost destroyed, maybe, just maybe, victory really wasn't worth the losses.
Then something far more important came to mind and she gasped, looking around the tent frantically. She noticed Kakashi giving her a strange look, but paid it no heed, there were things that outweighed everything on her mind, and the first thing on that short list was the welfare of her teammates, especially Naruto.
"Naruto! Where's Naruto!" she managed through the panicked breaths and felt a large, warm hand squeeze her shoulder comfortingly.
"Calm down, Sakura. Naruto is alright. Like he'd let Pein and his puppet army kill him."
Damn that man and his playing everything down.
"What the hell, Kakashi! This is no joking matter! Pein is likely the most powerful shinobi in the world. He has the rinnegan, and the rinnegan is the ultimate doujutsu. It tops the byakugan, it tops the sharingan, it tops everything! And those bodies were no puppets! I know what puppets are like, I have fought the master of those things, and even Sasori's most powerful human puppet pales horribly in comparison to the incarnation of the Six Paths of Pain! I don't know about you, but I've done my homework and know what Pein is capable of! Look what that puppet did to you!"
It was a good thing for Kakashi that she didn't have her strength back fully and that she needed her chakra to control the pain coursing through her limbs and head or he would be meeting her fist up close and personal, followed by a free flight across the village, courtesy to her monstrous power. And he knew it.
"Sakura, I know. Believe me, I know. That had been the strongest opponent I've ever faced, and it wasn't even the main body. I know that I'm lucky to be alive – though I should thank you for that. Nevertheless, Naruto got him; he beat Pein. The rinnegan might top every other doujutsu in the world, but it can never top Naruto's endless optimism and his belief. Pein is dead and Naruto is outside, helping the rebuilding team. He was here, by your bedside until two minutes before you woke up. You know that the Kyuubi won't let him get to harm or be killed."
Of course, she knew, but she also knew that the Kyuubi would one day be the end of Naruto if he didn't learn to suppress the chakra completely. The damage it did to his body every time it got free would one day be too much for even Sakura or Tsunade to heal completely.
Still, Kakashi didn't deserve her yelling at him.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, glancing down at the sheet covering her. "I shouldn't be screaming at you, I'm just so angry and frustrated..."
She didn't look up and couldn't see his nod, so he spoke, "I know, Sakura. Don't worry about it. I know you don't mean it. You, at least, have always respected me, thus you were my favorite."
She smiled at his mild joke and looked at him. He gave a small wave and an eye-crinkling smile. She chuckled. "That's hypocritical and you know it. But, yes, I've always respected, admired, and looked up to you. You were always the best and coolest ninja I've ever seen."
He chuckled lightly and shook his head. "Stop, you're making me blush. But I think you've just confused me with Sasuke-kun."
Sakura looked him straight in the eye with a serious expression and shook her head one. "No. I've admired Sasuke for his good looks and the fact that he was the top of our academy class and I've wanted his attention, 'cause I thought that it would make me seem more important. Of course, I've come to genuinely care for him when we became teammates, but I've also seen all his faults and shortcomings, I've just decided to ignore them in favor of the things that were good about him. But you... Since the moment I've met you to this day, you've been the one person who was infallible in my eyes, even compared to Tsunade-shishou, even with your unhealthy addiction to literary porn. I guess first impressions do count for something."
She'd averted her gaze and hadn't seen his eyes widening, or the nervous gulp as he regarded her flushed face with anxious interest. Not able to process his thoughts completely, Kakashi gave a small nervous laugh and rubbed the back of his head, where usually the knot of his hitai-ate was.
"Now you're just plain out flattering me," he muttered and struggled to keep his laughing face, but failed when she suddenly lost the blush and fixed almost suspicious emeralds on him. Then she laughed.
"You're right. I wouldn't want to inflate your ego anymore than it already is, you may not pass through a door otherwise."
And it was easier to breathe and he could look her in the eyes without being afraid of what he might read there.
Just as he was about to say something, Shizune neared and sat down on the edge of Sakura's bed. She looked tired, dead on her feet, pale, with shadowed eyes and slightly shaking hands, messy hair and tearstains on her cheeks. She tried to smile for Sakura, but it turned into a painful grimace and the pink-haired medic's delicate features set in a worried scowl. She sat up a bit more and took Shizune's cold, moist hand.
"Shizu-nee, you okay?" seeing and hearing the real concern in the younger woman's voice, Shizune managed a real smile a nodded her head a bit, squeezing Sakura's hand.
"Just tired, Sakura. A lot has happened in the last few days. You were out and I had to do all the healing, I'm just exhausted."
Sakura regarded her with a penetrating gaze before sighing and looking down. "I can imagine. But, Shizu-nee, how is shishou? Is she alright?"
To Sakura's relief a smile lit on Shizune's face and she bobbed her head up and down almost happily. "Yes, she's fine. Drained and exhausted, but fine. Thanks to you. But Genma..." she trailed off and Sakura grasped her hand tighter, encouraging her to look up.
"Is there anything I can do for him? Just tell me, I'm alright now."
Shizune shook her head and tears rolled down her cheek; Sakura gulped and felt her heart jump in nervous anxiousness.
"He died this morning... I've tried everything, but he's lost too much blood... I wasn't able to help him... I failed him..."
"You can't think like that, Shizu-nee!" Sakura exclaimed earnestly, looking unflinchingly into the older woman's dark, sad eyes. "You didn't fail Genma-san! You did what you could. None of us are miracle-workers; we're humans too. Even if we are the best medics there are, we can't heal everyone, shishou will be the first to attest to that. Besides Genma-san wouldn't want you to talk like that. I'm sure he's only sad that he can't be with you anymore, but you have to believe that he's in a better place now, Shizu-nee."
Shizune smiled a bit and wiped the tears from her cheeks. "You're so sweet, Sakura. But you're right. I should focus on what's in front of me and be grateful that I got the chance to say goodbye, many people don't even have that, sometimes. Thank you."
"No need to thank me, Shizu-nee," Sakura smiled encouragingly. "But tell me, how are the others, what's with the village?"
The older medic took a deep breath and tried to stay composed. "Well, it was a huge fight, and we sustained losses, but that's natural. I'm sure you'll be happy to hear that your team is okay so far." Sakura nodded, happy and relieved. "Sai and Yamato-san were hurt, but nothing bad. Sai had a head-injury, but no concussion and a broken arm. Yamato-san suffered a few fractured ribs, but that's about it, besides a few scarps and gashes. Naruto is fully okay. I guess the Kyuubi's chakra protected him from anything worse then a few scarps here and there."
"Protecting him is optional, I'd say," Sakura cut in, a scowl on his face. "It does him more damage than good, but at least he didn't black out, so I suppose that he hasn't spurted more than one tail?"
At this Shizune shrugged and looked at Kakashi. The Copy Ninja had his face buried in a book, but he'd been listening and when he felt eyes on him, he sighed and put the book in his lap, turning to look Sakura in the eye.
"Well, at first he fought Pein all on his own, but then things started to get worse. I was with him at that time, but was busy fighting Pein's partner, the blue-haired woman. Suddenly, Pein said something and got Naruto angry, he lost control of the fox, and chakra began leaking. He spurted two tails immediately, but I couldn't stop him, my opponent wouldn't let me. Pein taunted him further and he started forming the third tail. That's when Hyuuga Neji and Rock Lee jumped in, attacking Pein, but he just swatted them away. That got Naruto even angrier and he spurted two more tails. Pein must have sensed the danger and sent his partner away. I tried to get to Naruto but was detained by one of Pein's bodies. By the time Tenzou had gotten there, Naruto had spurted seven tails and was rampaging, attacking Pein, but destroying everything around himself as well. Somehow, Naruto seemed to calm down, and the tails started detracting and disappeared completely. Naruto had suppressed the Kyuubi's chakra on his own, and defeated Pein after that. Sai told me that. I was out before he'd spurted the fourth tail. When I woke up, you were laying over Tsunade-sama, both of you unconscious and Shizune was tending to Sai, not far from me."
"He suppressed the Kyuubi's chakra on his own?" Sakura asked.
Kakashi nodded and Sakura gaped even more. Wow, her mental counterpart managed to stutter out, Naruto is even greater than we thought. That's some cool crap he pulled of there. The Outer Sakura could only agree wholeheartedly. I knew that he is able to always astound us, it IS Naruto after all, but to suppress the Kyuubi just like that… she trailed off with a soft, amazed sigh.
Shizune was about to say something when a clattering at the deeper end of the tent caught their attention. Ino stumbled through the curtain that separated the Hokage's bed from the rest of the tent, pale and with a shocked expression on her face. She spotted Shizune at Sakura's bed and hurried to them, shouting, "Shizune-san, Sakura! Hurry! Come help!"
Both kunoichi jumped up, confused, but the blond was already speaking again. "It's Tsunade-sama! She suddenly stopped breathing!"
Dread flooded through Sakura as she jumped over Kakashi's bed and run to her frantic friend. "Shishou!" she breathed, willing her heart to calm and her breathing to slow, it would do none of them any good if she passed out before even getting to Tsunade.
Ripping the linen curtain away, Sakura fell to her knees by her mentor's bed and instantly directed chakra to her hands, bringing them to Tsunade's neck.
Nothing. No heart beat. No breath. Nothing. Tsunade's body was an empty shell.
Sakura's hands shook as she lifted them from her mother's lifeless form; tears clouded her vision as she stared at the pale, wrinkled, beloved face that had become so familiar and dear to her.
"Shishou?" she whispered brokenly, touching Tsunade's cold brow with trembling fingers. No reply came. Not even a twitch. "Shishou?" she tried louder, beginning to shake uncontrollably. When her mentor still didn't react, desperation seized her and she took hold of Tsunade's shoulders, shaking the old woman slightly. "Shishou, wake up!"
Her pained cry stabbed through those gathered around the Hokage. At the other side of Tsunade's bed Shizune emitted a small sob and covered her mouth with her hand, staring at her younger fellow apprentice. Sakura was deadly pale, her green eyes frantic and unfocused, as she continued calling for Tsunade as if willing the woman back to life with her desperate cries.
Ino collapsed to her knees, digging her fingers into the ground, shaking and crying. Kakashi tightened his hands into fists until his knuckled whitened and dropped his gaze to his feet, he couldn't watch this. Sai, who'd been the one closest to the exit run out on unsteady feet, in search for Naruto, but he truly had no idea how to break this news to his teammate.
"Stop," Shizune croaked, taking Sakura's hands in her own. "Stop, Sakura-chan. She's dead."
The younger kunoichi jolted as if electrified. "No! She can't be dead! No! Wake up, shishou!"
"She'd dead!" Shizune shouted and willed Sakura to look at her.
She didn't. She wrenched her hands free and fisted them on Tsunade's robes, completely absorbed in her grief, and unwilling to accept the bitter truth. "No! No no no no no no no no no! NO! Shishou! Nooo!"
Unable to watch any longer, Kakashi kneeled behind the sobbing kunoichi and wrapped his arms around her waist, hauling her into her and away from Tsunade's motionless form. "Sakura, calm down!" he whispered harshly in her ear, but she only struggled against him.
"No! Let me go! Let me go!"
He tightened his hold around her and slowly stood up, mindful of her kicking legs. "Sakura, listen to me! You've got to calm down!"
When she continued trashing in his arms, he lifted her higher and shifted his hold until he was carrying her bridal-style.
She started beating against his chest and struggled even harder. But he didn't let go and proceeded to carry her outside. That seemed to worsen her panic.
"No! Let me down! Don't take me away! Shishou! Let me down, Kakashi! I hate you! Let me down! Let me down! Let me down, goddamn you!"
"You can hate me later all you want. Now you need to get out of here, Sakura." He whispered to her writhing form and walked by Naruto who run past them blindly and disappeared behind the curtain. A second later, his anguished exclamation shocked Sakura into silence and rattled the broken village.
But the biggest loss has yet to come.
A.N./ And this is chapter three. The drama part is officially starting. This was incredibly hard to write. Tsunade is one my favorite characters there are and since I like to look at her and Sakura's relationship like that of mother and daughter, it made this even harder. I have a very deep bond with my own mother and the mere thought of losing her is giving me chills, though I know that it will happen someday. So let's just say that I know very well what Sakura is going through right now.
Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter that you will drop me a few lines and comment on it.
Julie
