Heavy

"NARUTO!"

The blond whirled around to face the livid pink-haired kunoichi in the doorway. He knew he was fucked up and blanched as white as the clothes he was wearing.

Sakura advanced on her best friend, killing intent palpable as she cracked her fists and stood directly in front of him.

"Care to elaborate what you're doing with my uchikake?" Her tone was eerily clam and Naruto shuddered. She was much less dangerous when she was shouting and cursing. A silently seething Sakura meant instant death or loss of male anatomy. He couldn't quite decide which was worse.

"W...Well you see, Sakura-chan... I... I was just... Heheheh, hah... You see..." Naruto kept stuttering, slowly inching backwards, putting his hands up in a placating manner. It only irritated her further.

"All that I see Naruto," she hissed, leaning on her toes to bring herself to face-level with him. "Is your ass wearing my uchikake. And I want to know why. You better had a damn good reason, or else..."

She didn't need to finish the sentence for the threat to be crystal clear to the blond kyuubi vessel.

"I just wanted to see if it's as heavy as Ino-chan and Hinata-chan said it was!" he blurted clenching his eyes shut and praying that she'll kill him quickly and painlessly.

When nothing came he peeked one eye open and saw Sakura at the door. Then she shouted.

"KAKASHI! Move your lazy ass in here and get your best man out of my uchikake or there won't be a wedding, but a funeral or two instead!"

Naruto exhaled a sigh of relief a moment before it dawned that he'd just compromised Kakashi's wedding and that the Copy Ninja was a bigger sadist than his bride and wouldn't let Naruto get out of it unscatched.

"Sakura-chan! Come back, pleaseee! Saukraaa-chaaan!"

He wailed louder as the Copy Ninja entered with a murderous look in his one dark eye, the crimson sharingan glinting as he approached his terrified ex-student.


A.N./ This was written just before the trip as I was waiting for my tardy-ass brother to get into the car and Mom was on the phone with Dad of all people arguing about us not spending time with his parents, as if either of us like them. It got me thinking that some people just aren't meant to marry, especially if the man leaves when the youngest child is three and the eldest five. But either way I hope you enjoyed it.

Julie