A/N Hello, All! This chapter is more angsty than h/c but I'll try to add more of that in the next installment. Also, I would like to thank you for all the wonderful reviews! Special thanks to amblue36 and kimber1461 for sending me the pm's and encouraging me to continue! I apologize to all of you for the delay. I will try to get the next chapter up faster. For now, I hope you enjoy this one. ~Kelcor
The next morning, consciousness came slowly for Steve McGarrett. Memories of the past few days didn't come back to him right away. Still in the blissful ignorance of sleep, all Steve knew was that he felt safe. The next thing he realized was that he was curled against something warm. He felt the rise and fall of a broad chest beneath his cheek, strong arms were wrapped around his shoulders and back. He flashed back to a time as a young boy, shortly after his mother had died, his father had held him as he slept, in an effort to ward off the nightmares he had been having every night since that fateful knock on their door. That had been the first full night's sleep he had gotten in weeks. The nightmares were few and far between after that... until last night...
With that, the onslaught of memories launched their attack! Running through the forest with Danny. A rattlesnake. Getting bitten by said rattlesnake! A vague memory of getting sick in a dark cave and having the same arms wrapped around him then as now. Doctors and nurses. Blindness! He was blind! Then he remembered the nightmare from the night before, seeing his family die over and over again, then sobbing in Danny's arms!
To say Lieutenant Commander Steve McGarrett was mortified would be an understatement! He could feel the flush rise to his cheeks - not just a flush of embarrassment, though. A flush of anger. Rage. Not towards Danny but towards himself, for being so weak, so vulnerable, so... helpless that he had needed his partner to hold him while he slept.
He moved carefully away from Danny. Trying his best not to wake his partner, Steve made his way to the other side of the bed and swung his legs over the edge. Barefoot, he stepped in the general direction of his bedroom door. Somewhere in the back of his mind, it struck him that he didn't even know if it was morning yet. Regardless, he had to get away, he had to distance himself from Danny. More importantly, he had to pull himself together, regain some composure... some pride.
That plan took a flying leap out the window, however, when Steve McGarrett, Super SEAL extraordinaire... stubbed his toe against the door. He yelped, more out of surprise than pain but, nevertheless, adding to his already bruised ego.
Danny instantly woke, in a panic, to say the least. He looked around the room and found his partner hunched over on the floor, holding his foot or his leg, the detective couldn't be sure. All he knew was that he had fallen asleep on the job. He was supposed to be protecting Steve, if for no other reason than to repay the SEAL for saving his life in the cave. Like a mother hen on steroids, Danny leapt across the bed and reached a hovering stance over his fallen partner in 0.2 seconds.
"Steve? Are you okay?" Curiously, the panic in his voice was still mixed with a lingering grogginess.
"I'm fine, Danny," Steve bit out.
"Are you sure? What happened? Come on, let's get you back to the bed so I can take a look," Danny offered, taking Steve by the arm and pulling him to his feet.
McGarrett yanked his arm out of his partner's grip, barely controlling the anger burning inside him, some of which was now indeed directed at Danny and his patronizing tone. "I said, I'm fine, Danny! I'm not a child! I just stubbed my toe for crying out loud!"
Instantly recognizing the animosity in Steve's voice, Danny backed off a step, hands held up in a placating manner. "Okay, okay. You don't have to take my head off. I was just trying to help."
"Well, I don't need your help."
At that moment, Steve's cell phone rang in Danny's pocket.
"Is that my...?" The ring tone was the one Steve had assigned to Catherine's number. He'd recognize that tone anywhere. He couldn't talk to her right now. He just... suddenly, something occurred to him. He cocked his head to one side and listened carefully.
Danny could almost see the gears clicking into place, switching Steve straight into SEAL-mode. Guiltily, he plucked the object from his pocket but it was too late, Super-SEAL had already guessed where the phone was based on its close proximity. "What are you doing with my cell phone?"
"I, uh, had to make a phone call?"
"Who, Danny? Who did you call?"
"I don't suppose you'd believe me if I told you Ghostbusters?"
"No, Danny, you're right, I wouldn't." The look on McGarrett's face, though aimed a little over Danny's shoulder, was enough to let the detective know that he wasn't getting out of this one.
"I'm sure Catherine is just calling to make sure you're okay," Danny tried.
"Why would she think otherwise?" Then: "You told her about... you told her what happened, didn't you?"
"Yes, I did," Danny declared, his voice rising a bit with an anger of his own.
"Man, Danny, how could you?"
"You needed help and I was at a loss as to how to administer that help, so I thought -"
"Well, you thought wrong!"
"Why is it so difficult for you to admit that you need someone to help you?"
"Maybe it's just you that I don't want helping me, Danny! Ever think of that?"
The silence that enveloped the room could have been cut with a knife. Steve's eyes filled at the thought that he might have just damaged their friendship beyond repair this time. Still, he refused to let the tears fall. There'd been enough of that already.
Danny, his gaze having moved to the floor, didn't see the guilt and remorse on his partner's face. "Okay," he said, almost too quietly. "I'll, uh... I'll call Mary and have her come over."
Finally finding his voice again, Steve attempted at an apology, "Danny, I'm -"
"No, no. It's fine. Really. Just do me a favour and stay in this room until she gets here, okay? Can't have you falling down the stairs or something," he added, with some of his trademark snark embedded in the words - but not nearly enough.
Steve took a step toward his partner, wishing he could take back his words of anger but knowing that he couldn't. Unfortunately, Danny had already turned around and started for the door. "Bye, Steve."
McGarrett listened as Danny retreated down the stairs. He heard the front door open and close with an unmistakeable finality. Slipping his cell phone into the pocket of his pyjamas, he stepped backwards until the backs of his legs touched the bed, then collapsed onto the mattress. Placing his face in his hands, Steve cursed his own stupidity. He hadn't been angry with Danny, not really. Frustrated, yeah, but angry? No way. His partner had been nothing but patient and understanding during this crisis. And how had Steve repaid him? By yelling at him? Kicking him out of his home? Yeah, great friend you are, McGarrett! But, by far the worst part, was how he had just devalued the worth and importance of his best friend's presence in his life!
Now alone and able to think, Steve wondered about the emotional turmoil coursing through his veins, brought on, he was sure, by the crazy amount of medication they currently had him flying on. Before leaving the hospital, the doctor had told him the effects of the meds could be anything from feeling numb and disassociated, to being placed into a heightened emotional state. Apparently, each patient had a different reaction based on their own individual biological make up. So, lucky Steve, had been thrown onto the emotional rollercoaster end of the spectrum. He couldn't remember the last time he had cried as much as he had over the past 72 hours - and, yes, he was beginning to recall little snippets in the cave that had involved a few breakdowns. Not since his mother died had Steve shed so many tears.
Before his drug addled mind was able to take him down that dark road, the sound of the door opening downstairs yanked Steve back to the present. Maybe Danny had returned? He wiped the moisture from his eyes... and saw blurry shadows begin to take shape. The door... the wall...
"Danny?" Despair momentarily forgotten, Steve surged to his feet, excited to share this new development with his best friend. He bolted for the doorway... WHACK! And grunted when his knee collided with the door jamb. But his excitement had not abated. It was still progress. He couldn't see a lot but, darn it, he could see! So, with his hands extended out in front of him, he proceeded again, though more carefully this time, toward the door.
As he emerged out into the hallway, he was able to make out a figure coming up the stairs...
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Danny made it back to his own apartment but had yet to exit the vehicle. He sat with his forehead resting against the steering wheel, fingers wrapped so tight around it that his knuckles were white. Finally, he took a deep breath and sat back against the seat but kept his eyes closed. He thought back over the past few days and couldn't bring himself to regret any of it. He had only done what he believed to be the right thing to do to help Steve. He cringed inwardly. Nothing to regret until this morning, that is. Steve had stubbed his toe. Stubbed his friggin' toe! And Danny had fretted more than he would have if the same exact thing had happened to Grace! What was wrong with him? He was dealing with a grown man here. Worse. He was dealing with a SEAL for pity sake! Could he have been more condescending and patronizing! He hadn't meant to. He just... he just... Great! He couldn't even come up with a reasonable excuse for himself, how in the world was he going to explain his actions to Steve?
With a sigh of resignation, Danny turned the key still in the ignition and brought the engine back to life. If he couldn't come up with an excuse, he could at least offer up a heartfelt apology to his partner. As he stepped on the gas, he was silently thankful that he hadn't called Mary yet. If he was going to grovel and beg for forgiveness, he'd much rather do it without witnesses.
H50H50H50H50H50
A/N Please take a moment to review? I did my best to keep the guys in character but it's difficult for me to write them arguing like this for some reason. I tried to put myself in Steve's shoes and project how I believe he would react given the circumstances. Not sure if I succeeded, though.
