Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or Hannah Montana
BPOV
A Dose of the Past
When I first started writing songs, almost immediately learnt how to play the guitar. Within two months of intense practice, I could beat any musical (guitar) prodigy.
As I started with song writing, I would always, somehow think about my time with Ed-him. The first song I wrote was about my encounter with him. Later, when I got a tune for it to go with, it was pretty slow, but the music of the acoustic glided along with the words. The lyrics were along the lines of how, "I was enchanted to meet you".
(The song is 'Enchanted' by Taylor Swift. For lyrics and video, go on my profile)
Though my first proper encounter with him was in the Biology lab, around a week after my arrival, the time in the cafeteria also meant a lot to me considering the fact that my subconscious mind had made the decision for me then and there.
My first few songs revolved only around him. The time we met, the first 'almost like a date', the prom, my birthday and others. The second one was the about the time of my prom. How it had turned to be a fairytale. It was then that I realized how good it was and had been... it was just too good to be true.
The song about the prom basically describes how it all was a fairytale, that my prince charming didn't care what I wore or whether I had a cast on. He just cared about me...
(Song is 'Today was a fairytale' by Taylor Swift. Lyrics and video on my profile)
The next one was about my short period with him between my birthday and the day that he left. I mostly, even now, think that it was my fault that I never told him that every relationship has its hitches, and that every rose has its thorn.
(Song is 'Every rose has its thorn' by Miley Cyrus. Lyrics and video on my profile)
After quite a few more of happy-go-lucky songs, it was inevitable that I went on to the part that he left. Mostly I avoided songs related to the time after he left. Nothing was worth any amount of emotional breakdowns... there was one song that described me after he left.
(Song is 'When you're gone' by Avril Lavigne. Lyrics and video on my profile)
At that time, I never knew that these pieces of my creation, imagination... my heart, would ever be released, yet they never ever, not once, described my exact condition as though I he would ever listen to them. I didn't want him to know how much he broke me.
Sometimes, my mind wanders off thinking about the time that James bit me... the pain I felt, but for my now-non-existent-love, would go through it all over again. Again, the original piece was improvised to make it sound mundane and something considered very nonchalant when heard but to me, someone who knows the real meaning of the song... its as emotional and deep as a song can go.
(Song is 'Again' by Natasha Bedingfield. Lyrics and video on my profile)
Usually all my songs were on impulse and once I started, I would wait even for hours, if needed but would always would finish it somehow. Once, I was sleeping, and for the first time in a month, I didn't have a nightmare, it was almost as though he was right there, watching me, helping me cope. I woke up, it was unnatural that all of a sudden my nightmares just disappear. And all though the nightmares were painful, they were the only reminder that he existed. He was true to his words, at least in his point of view... it indeed was like he never existed. He couldn't stop my so-called-friends, Charlie, Billy, and others to stop talking about their sudden 'disappearance'.
My first nightmare-less night, started with depression. Would I really get over him? Would I really fall in love again...? That night was a very big night for me... I made progress that I never expected. I started to say his name without any hesitation...in my head at least. Hey, no judging, it reeeally IS a big thing! Well anyways, that night, I really believed that Edward (see I told you!) would never come back. For me, I would capture every moment in lyrics. This moment needed its own song, and, well, as I said, once I start, I never stop! I made myself a cup of coffee. By the time I took my coffee, only one verse was left. Till the time I finished my mug, I was over the moon high (almost like Alice!)(and seriously, that happens, at least to my one friend). and in my "coffee high" the last verse turned out to be hopeful, saying that the boy actually comes back to the girl.
(Song is 'Goodbye' by Miley Cyrus. Lyrics and video on my profile)
The morning next, I went through the song and actually thought it was good. It didn't seem at all like some thing written in the middle of the night, under the influence of coffee. Well those were the inspiration to my first few emotional songs. For a while I also went through a stage of pop songs.
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