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Characters from Hogan's Heroes do not belong to me.
The Thrilling Adventures of a Boy Spy
:: Part, the Sixth ::
I looked through the door slit again. The man in blue was talking to a black-skinned man. I'd never seen a dark man like him since before Papa got his new job. The one I knew was really nice; he used to work with Papa. But he went to visit his aunt in America and we never saw him again. I was sad.
But anyway, the two of them turned briefly in my direction, then snapped back to look at the black-coated fellow in the room. He was shouting awfully, telling people what to do and where to go. I didn't think that was any proper way to talk to somebody. He was sure not making any friends around here.
But I could see the man in blue working to get back to me, like he promised. Whispers were going around, from the dark man to a short one, to someone with a cap like Hogan's, and finally to the red-scarfed fellow I'd seen before. Suddenly people started talking back to the black coat, he starting getting mad again, and the crowd got thick around the man in blue (my "contact," let's say).
Then, when they'd worked up quite the commotion, my contact slipped towards me and brushed open and shut the door.
"Now, little fella, let me get this straight. Hogan sent you?" He talked in a harried, accented whisper.
"Yes, sir." I felt a little formal.
"Why you?"
"I'm Ernie Gottlieb. Papa works with Uncle Klein."
"I know that."
"Does that mean you trust me?"
"Why are you helping our side?"
Oh, the sides thing again. "I'm with Papa, that's all – and Hogan." Yes, they were together. "I want to help." I think I sounded a little grim there. It sort of scared me when I realized how scared I must have been inside to sound that way. "I just want to help Papa, that's all," I said more to myself than anyone this time.
My contact must have noticed me. He leaned close to me. "Ernie, no need to bawl, everything's goin' to be just fine. Yeah, just fine." He knelt close to me. "The Jerries don't send us honest chaps like you. So, Ernie, Hogan told us not to get to 'im?"
"Yes, sir."
"Did 'e tell us what ideas 'e had?"
"Uh, no, he asked what the situation was here – so he could plan."
"The situation, eh? Well, it's downright crazy. This new guard is grabbin' everythin' in sight. I'm lucky if I could keep the shirt on my back."
"So I tell him that?"
He shook his head. "No, Ernie. Tell 'im it's just crazy right now – and not to miss Rita Hayworth. He took 'er, too."
"Whose she?"
He smiled, a sort of happy and sad smile. "Tell 'im this new guard is takin' liberties with our things, that's all. And that Major Klein is threatening to put us out of business if we can't prove Papa Bear doesn't live here."
I blinked. Boy, that was that a long message. But I have a memory technique Mrs. Meister taught me. It's too long and complicated to go into now, since you'd lose the flow of my story if I stop and explain. But this time I was sure I'd remember it.
He whispered again. "I really 'ate to trust you, I'll be honest. But seein' we 'ave no other choice – and seein' that the guv'nor already trusted you this much. Well, I'm in."
"Uh, yeah." The man sure talked funny. I figured I should get his name, but instead of just asking it the boring way, I remembered something Mama read from our big Bible. "Whom shall I say sent me?" I asked loftily.
He looked at me funny. "Tell Colonel Hogan that Newkirk sent you, Peter Nekwirk. He'll know."
Peter Newkirk, I repeated in my mind.
He stood up and peered out the door. "I'd love to stay and chat, Ernie, but I can't risk our guest catchin' on." He snuck over quickly to the window and peered out. "We're sure puttin' a whole lot of faith in ya. Don't know what the guv'nor was thinkin'. Coast's clear, by the way. Better get a move on."
I stepped over the metal box. "Thank you, Newkirk," I said quite professionally, in my opinion.
He nodded and I slipped out the window once more. I paused suddenly. If I went to the left, I risked meeting that guy again; to the right, meeting Uncle and blowing my cover. I figured I'd take my chance and go left. But things couldn't go that smoothly for me, could they? I didn't even get halfway in my journey before I met the big round one. Well, at least he wasn't a black coat. It was gray, so maybe he was only halfway bad.
He peered down at me. "Little fellow, what are you doing around here?"
"I just came out..." I threw my hand around behind me, being vague.
"Well, back, back, back! You don't want the Major getting mad again. You know, he's even worse than the Kommandant."
He herded me towards that building across the open space. This was not going to work. "Excuse me, but … but, can't I see Papa?" I looked up and gave my best baby face.
"Oh, poor little fellow. Ernie, right? You're Ernie?"
"Yes, Herr..."
"Schultz."
"Herr Schultz, please, may I see Papa?" I flapped my little hands in his face.
"But, Ernie, the Major does not allow anyone to go there."
I clapped my hands together. "Please! I have to see him, he's my Papa."
Schultz scrubbed his face with his hand. "Papa. Always Papa. Of course, I understand. I'll let you see him, but you must keep this between you and me, you understand? No monkey business!" He squinted. "What am I talking about. Colonel Hogan's in the cooler. Come, come. We'll go this way. The Major is that way, see?"
So that's how I got to see Papa and Hogan again.
"Ernie!" Papa exclaimed, a bit guardedly. Hogan looked hard at us, taking in everything in those big brown eyes.
Schultz looked sorry as he talked to me. "Please hurry, Ernie. The guards might get suspicious!"
"Just watch outside, then, Schultz," Hogan piped up. "Like a regular guard. Tell us if Klein's coming. I'm sure the kid will tell you when he's ready to go."
Ah! A moment of spy gold. Hogan sure knew his this business. Schultz couldn't argue with that logic, so he Schultz hurried off, leaving us with a final "Be quick!" before he shuffled out of earshot.
Hogan knelt down to my level fast. "Okay, give it. What's going on out there?"
I counted on my fingers. "One, the new guard is taking liberties with our stuff. Two, Major Klein threatens to shut the business if we won't prove Papa Bear isn't here. Three, I was sent by one Peter Newkirk!" I smiled. Mission accomplished. Yes.
"Figures," Hogan sighed, shaking his head sadly.
"Hi, Papa!" I waved, feeling pretty good about myself.
"Ernie, I'm worried about you."
"Why, Papa?"
"Shh," Hogan waved us down. "I've got an idea."
"It doesn't involve Ernst, does it?"
"Well, yes, it does."
"I cannot hear of it!"
"But, Papa!" I shrieked.
"I cannot have my son running around doing dangerous things."
"Papa, you're angry."
Papa sighed heavily and sank to the floor. "I – I don't know what came over me. Colonel Hogan, please don't try your wild schemes on, on such a little boy."
"I'm not such a little—"
"Relax, Corporal. I have it all figured out. Remember you told me about your wife? It works out perfectly. Now, Ernie." He looked me in the eye. "Listen carefully. This is serious, and you can't miss a single step. We're all depending on you. Got it?"
"Why, uh, yes." Boy, did the man do a good job of deflating one's balloon. I looked over at Papa, his collar loosened, his clothes dusty, and his hair a tousle. And I thought of Mama, still worried somewhere out there. "Yeah." I shuffled my feet. "This is, this is not a game."
Hogan's voice lowered and quickened. "Ernie, for a short while, you're going to take my place – as Papa Bear."
