Chapter 3: A New Beginning

A/N: Well, here we go… we now see Ren being nice! Enjoy ;D

The next morning, Stimpy stretched and woke up, yawning. "Yay! Another sunny day with my favorite person, Ren! Wake up, hon- wait. Where is Ren? Hmm."

"Good morning!" Ren came frolicking into the room with two trays. "Ren? Are you okay? Yer never up this early!"

"Aw, Steempy, my baby, what do you mean?"

"Well, usually you knock me out with a baseball bat so I'll stop talking."

"Oh, Steempy!" He crawled next to him in bed, gently placing one of the trays on his lap and putting the other on his own. "Those days are over! I'm a changed man… um, dog!"

"Really?"

"Yep! And notheeng will change me back!" He put a strange emphasis on his words like Zim. And yes, I'm probably gonna make a Zim reference in every fan fic! ;D

"Wull… that's great, Ren! Good for you!"

"Wonderful! Now let us watch Muddy Mudskeeper until our eyeballs rot!"

"Duh, but Ren, you hate Muddy Mudskipper! And besides, we don't have a TV in our room!"

"Eh, eet's a fan feec. And besides, our house changes een every episode. And eef eet's your favoreete show, eet's mine too." He smiled sweetly and kissed Stimpy on the cheek. They cuddled up together.

Later that day, Stimpy proceeded to lick himself passionately on the couch. "Ah! Nothing like a nice bath to calm yer nerves! Well, I should get dinner started." He hummed "Paperback Writer" to himself. His stomach started rumbling. "Huh? Oh, boy." He started gagging. Of course, he hacked multiple hairballs. "Oh, no! I hacked hairballs all over Ren's paperclip collection!" He started shaking uncontrollably. "He's gonna be home any minute! Oh, God, he's pulling into the driveway!" He gulped. Ren came galloping into the house. "Hello, Steempy my love!" He skipped over to Stimpy, wrapped his arms around him and gave him a great big smooch. "Hey, you been using some new mouthwash? It's lovely!" (Keep in mind that he just hacked hairballs!) "Uh… um, Ren?" He stuttered, still shaking. "I… I…" He gulped again and took a deep breath. "I hhhhacked hairballs on yer paperclip collection!"

"Yeah, so?"

"So? I-I ruined one of yer favorite things!"

"Favorite thing?" Ren put his arm around Stimpy's neck… um, torso. "Steempy, you're my favorite theeng! I love you! No more Mr. mean Ren! When I said I've changed, I meant eet! Een fact, I theenk you deserve a treat!" He stopped shaking "A treat?"

"Yep. How 'bout you and me go out to deener tonight? Eet's on me!"

"Oh, Ren, I can't let'chou pay for it yerself! You gotta let me chip in just a little!"

"Uh… would that make you happy?"

"Of course it would, honey!"

"Okay! We spleet the beell! But that's not just eet! We're running low on food, so what do you say we run to the store?"

"STORE?" Stimpy's pupils grew. "Did you say… store?"

"Yep!"

"You-you never let me come to the store."

"That's gonna change from now on, darling."

"Can I freak out now, Ren?"

"Mm, when we're een the car."

"OKAY!"

Ren was casually shopping and humming to himself while Stimpy ran through the isles, tearing things off the shelves, repeating "Store store store store store store!"

"Oh, Stee-mpy!" Ren called playfully yet suggestively. "STORE!" Stimpy came to a screeching halt, literally making the sound of a car coming to a screeching stop. He held out a catnip toy. Stimpy gasped, growing big, teary eyes. "Ren… really? You said- oh, yeah, you renounced your old ways. THANK YOU!" He kissed and hugged him repeatedly. "Aw, I love you too, Steempy!" They hugged and rocked for a few seconds. "Come on, Ren, we should probably go pay fer this up front."

"Good idea." As they walked away holding hands, a store clerk freaked out. "WHO'S RESPONSIPLE FOR THIS?" He screeched, pointing to massive piles of V8 and Cheetos and all sorts of supermarket crap.

That night, the two were at a restaurant… a very fancy one. "Gosh, Ren, I just don't know howdda thank you!"

"Oh, Steempy, don't thank me! I owe thees to you. I have for years and years and years!" He sniffed, some tears in his eyes. "I've destroyed you weeth my anger, haven't I? Oh, the misery I must have caused you! Steempy… I hope you're not traumatized!"

"Ren, it's okay, really!" He said. "You've been nothing but good and kind to me!"

"No! You have done notheeng but wonderful to me seence the day we met, and what have I done? DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED!" He bawled. "Ren, people are staring. And please, don't be hard on yourself!"

"NO! I HAVE TO BE! Tell me, Steempy, what deed you do when I heet you then abandoned you to go to work? Deed you cry? Eempale yourself? Attempt suicide? TELL ME, PLEASE!"

"Well, uhhhh..."

FLASHBACK TIME!

There were just numerous clips of Stimpy farting, hacking hairballs, picking his nose, playing accordion, and wearing a tutu and makeup, dancing around the room like a fairy princess.

FLASHBACK OVER!

Ren stared at him blankly. "Oh, who the hell am I to judge? Steempy, I'm sorry! I'll never pretend you're Julia Roberts during sex again!" He leaned across