A/N: Hello! I'm finally back with a very lengthy chapter of Journey For Friendship!

I'd like to thank all my readers for reading this far, you're all great and are giving my great inspiration to keep writing.

Disclaimer… um…

Blaze: Alright, I'll do it. We are not owned by this writer, we are owned by SEGA. There, how was it?

Me: That was good. But… I think the readers should vote on who should star in the A/N sections of the story. The two characters with the most votes will star in one chapter!

Shadow: Let's start the fic.

Me: Hey! That's my line! Anyway, hope you like it!

xXxXxXx

*Ryan's POV*

"Quiet, everybody! He's due back any second!" Tails said in a hush tone to the rest of us. We were currently hiding throughout our room waiting for Shadow to return so we could throw him his surprise party. It was Sonic's idea, and for some reason the others didn't seem so enthusiastic…

The front door knob wiggled. "Quiet! He's here!" Sonic whispered as we all pressed deeper into our spots. (No way, I had NO idea…)

Shadow walked in and flicked on the lights. At our cue, we all jumped up and screamed, "SURPRISE!" He simply crossed his arms, "Wow, I am SO surprised."

"What? But nobody told you, and you obviously didn't hear us…" Sonic thought out loud. "Guys, you were too loud!" Everyone simultaneously facepalmed.

xXxXx

A while later, we were all talking in small groups. I was with Tails, Sonia, Shadow, and Manic.

"So, bro. No presents again?" Manic questioned as he slapped Shadow's shoulder. Shadow had a step-away-from-me-right-now-or-else-I-kill-you-and-all-the-descendants-of-your-family-because-I-am-seriously-pissed-off look on his face, but Manic didn't seem to take the hint. Tails stepped in before anyone's glare vaporized anyone else.

"No, he doesn't like them. We should be grateful that he allowed the cake." Tails said. "Speaking of cake…" Sonia hinted. "Oh, yeah!" Tails raised his voice, "Come on, everybody! Let's go have cake!"

Cheers followed that all important sentence. "But I have a card…" I mumbled, not really intending to be heard. "Ooh!" Sonic exclaimed and snatched the envelope from my hands and shoved it in Shadow's face, "Open it, buddy!"

Shadow growled in response. "Oh no, I'm sorry, Ryan. I thought that you knew that presents included cards to not give him…" Tails apologized. "Oh…" I replied sadly. "But he could accept just this once, right?" I asked hopefully.

Shadow sighed, "Ugh, fine. But only this once!" He popped open the envelope and read the card aloud.

"Happy birthday, Shadow! I hope all your wishes come true! Your friend, Ryan." he read and closed the card as he started to chuckle.

"What's so funny?" I asked. He just continued to laugh like a mentally unstable psychopath. "What it is?" I repeated. This was getting uncomfortable.

"You actually think… that you're my friend?" Shadow said, still laughing. "Well, yeah. Of course we're friends!"

He kept laughing, "You seriously got that from me?"

"Yes! But what's so funny?" I asked.

He suddenly ripped the card and threw it on the ground as he abruptly stopped laughing. "You think you're my friend?" he started to raise his voice.

"Um, yeah. Geez, Shadow, calm down." I replied. He got really close to me. "You aren't! Are you that stupid?"

"Excuse me?" "Shadow, it was just a card…" Tails tried to intervene.

"Shut up, Tails!" he snapped, not removing his eyes from mine. "This dense idiot thinks he's my friend!"

"Hey! I'm not dense, and I'm no idiot, you called me your friend before!" I retorted. "Wrong. You called yourself my friend. I simply lied to get out of an awkward situation, something you CAN'T do."

"You lied?" I asked, extremely surprised.

"Of course I did. Do you really think that someone just changes in the blink of an eye? Because they don't. Especially not me. That's not how life works. Because life isn't fair! Don't you get that? Friends will never be real, only taken away. That's why you will NEVER be my friend. NEVER!"

Tails wanted to step in, but Sonic stopped him. "Stay here, Tails. Ryan's gonna blow."

"You lied to me, just to get me to stop nagging you?" I asked rhetorically. "Well, yeah! What did you expect?" Shadow replied. "I expected you to stay true to your word. I expected you to value friendship like I have learned to. I expected you to not be such an asshole about a freaking birthday card!"

"Well it seems that you were expecting all the wrong things, because you don't deserve my friendship. Nobody does!" Shadow seemed to finish, but Ryan sure wasn't.

"That was a terrible decision for you to make. You decided that instead of being responsible and trying to repair your ways like you said you would, you lied straight to my face, and you have been for the last week!" "Who cares if what I di-" "I'M NOT DONE YET!"

Everyone shuffled back a couple steps at my outburst. "Wow, not many people have the courage to talk to Shadow like this…" Tails whispered to Amy.

"You know, before I met all you guys, I was a lot like you. I thought that everything would be better if I just did everything by myself. I thought that nobody cared about me, and that I shouldn't care about them either. I thought that friends were a weakness, not a strength. But now I know I was wrong. Life is better WITH friends, because friends care for you, help you out, back you up when you're in trouble, and love you no matter what. Friendship is an incredible strength, but you just don't understand. You insulted me, made me feel unwanted, and ignored me, and then you comforted me, but all as a lie! You said you'd change, you hugged me, you told everyone you'd improve, and you led me to think we were friends, and it was ALL a lie! Do you have any idea how wrong that is?"

Shadow didn't answer.

"I come to the IPIA, and meet all these wonderful people. I try my best to fit in, be liked, be accepted. I succeed. At least I thought I did. Now I know I didn't, because I'm not your friend. I really thought that for once in my life, I was being accepted and not being a failure. But you've shown me that I was wrong. Thank you, Shadow. Now I know that my new trust for people wasn't supposed to be. You have ruined me, you know that? Now, friendship is not an option, just like you wanted. I hope you're happy now, because that's what Maria would've wanted. If you aren't, I don't know what she would say right now. I do know that what you did was very, very wrong, and everyone here agrees. Including Maria. It's just… so… wrong…" I said as my lip started to quiver. No, this couldn't be happening. I don't cry, I never have. But I've also never been dug into so deeply. I have to leave now.

I ran out of the room as fast as my legs would take me, leaving behind a baffled, surprised, and emotional audience.

xXxXx

*Normal POV*

Everyone was frozen on the spot due to the surprising event that had just taken place. Even Shadow, who wasn't taken by surprise easily at all, was wondering what he had done to cause that.

"You sick, arrogant idiot!" Sonia finally yelped. "Do you have any clue what you just did?"

"He just broke an innocent heart!" Amy exclaimed angrily. "All because he gave you a birthday card?" Knuckles yelled.

"I think it's time for the people who 'don't deserve your friendship' to leave." Sonia stated darkly. Everyone nodded in agreement and filed out of Shadow's room.

"I don't know what goes on in that head of yours, Shadow. But I do know that went on inside it today, was the worst thing that could have." Rouge commented sadly as she closed the door behind her, leaving behind only Tails and Shadow at the ruined birthday party.

Tails picked up the ripped card from the floor. He observed it and sighed. "Shadow… why?" Shadow was still staring at the door. "Sit down." Tails ordered. Shadow surprisingly slowly complied.

"Listen, Shadow," Tails took a deep breath. "Hopefully now you understand how you made Ryan feel by doing that stuff to him. Everything he said was true, and was very painful for him to let out." Shadow was still silent, so the fox continued. "When you told Ryan you were his friend, that was a big thing for him. He thought that he had succeeded, that you trusted him, and would be there for him like friends are. I think he's recently realized that friendship is a good thing. But I'm not so sure what he thinks now…"

Shadow sighed very loudly and planted his face in his hands. "Shadow? What's wrong?" Tails asked. "I understand…"

"What? What do you understand, Shadow?" Tails questioned again, thinking he might have finally gotten somewhere. "I understand what I've done to Ryan…" Shadow replied. "And?"

"I'm a horrible person, Tails…" "Well, you were the last time you 'talked' to him." Tails said. Shadow lifted his head from his hands, "How can I make it better?"

"Go find Ryan, and figure it out for yourself." Tails replied sternly. He had never given Shadow an order before…

"Alright," Shadow said as he stood up, sounding composed once again. "But I think it's best if you don't come with me."

"I agree. I'll stay." Tails said. "Good luck."

"I don't need your luck, I need Ryan's forgiveness." Shadow stated determinedly as he left.

"I hope all goes well…" Tails murmured to himself.

xXxXx

*Shadow's POV*

I had made my way outside to look for Ryan. I have to find him to set things right. I don't know what I've been thinking… I lied to him, and I burst out at him because he called me his friend. Ugh, I'm such a monster… But I must at least set things right, because that is what Maria would've wanted.

*Ryan's POV*

As soon as I got out of there, I ran outside and found the most comforting place I could find. A small hill with a single tree upon the top.

I made my way there, and sat down with my legs drawn up to my chest. I wasn't in the best of moods.

I felt the scar over my left eye. Shadow had done this to me. He had apologized for it, hugged me, promised me he'd change, and called me his friend. But this whole thing was fake! I had finally thought that friendship wouldn't hurt me, but Shadow sure proved me wrong. Friendship is stupid, pointless, and has hurt me more than anyone could relate to. I can't trust anybody, because they don't really care about me.

And even though this is truly painful, I will not cry. I never have. Even when my parents died, I didn't. I was too shocked to shed a tear. But this has been eating at me my entire life, as the worst nightmare I could ever have, and to have Shadow voice it all as reality, is almost unbearable.

For the first time ever, a tear slipped down my cheek.

And it wouldn't be the last…

*Normal POV*

Shadow had finally found Ryan. He approached the creature he had come looking for whose face was buried in his hands, being as quiet as possible. A turquoise ear flicked at the sound. Ryan slightly raised his head to reveal his tear-stained face to whoever was visiting him. He realized it was Shadow, and he once again hid his face.

"Ryan?" Shadow asked, testing the feline's reaction. "Go away, Shadow. I don't want to talk to you." he replied with a sniffle. Shadow sat down beside him.

"Ryan, I know what I did was terribly wrong, and I can't change the past, but you have to hear me out." Ryan said nothing, so the black hedgehog continued.

"I know what it's like to be lied to, and I know it does NOT feel good. Especially when it's somebody you trusted who's lying to you. And when it's something you have recently changed about yourself that is revealed to be a detriment to yourself, it hurts even more. Believe me, I can relate."

"No you can't!" Ryan piped up. "You couldn't possibly have gone through as much emotional stress as I have!"

"Ryan, I have seen the closest person to me die. Watched as my whole life seemed to go down the drain. Experienced extreme discomfort around anyone from that point because I couldn't trust them, and didn't want anything to do with them. And so have you. I get that. But…"

"But to know that I caused someone to go through that because of what I did, is horrifying to me. When I realized that I'm not the only one who has gone through trauma in their life, and came to my senses, I had to repair what I had done to you."

"So you think another simple apology is going to make everything better again?" Ryan asked with retardation. "It sure won't this time, because I've had my share of being lied to by you." He wiped away his tears, "I won't let myself be dragged into something useless like this again. I don't want to feel helpless anymore! I don't want to be used, and treated like I don't have feelings! Because I may be able to keep them bundled up, but they're there! I don't want it, Shadow! I don't!"

Ryan's tears had started to flow again and his face had scrunched up in anger, sadness, and fear. Shadow had seen that face on Maria once, and it was not a pretty sight when the only thing that calmed her down was burying her face in a pillow. There weren't any pillows out here, but he did remember hearing that his chest fur was like a pillow…

On impulse, Shadow shoved Ryan's face into his chest and stroked the trembling figure. The cat panicked more at first, but seemed to relax in Shadow's embrace. He was hugging him again, but with sympathy this time. His gestures were as comforting as could be, an amazing feat for a creature like the black hedgehog. He seemed to be trying to soothe him, to make him feel better. Something like this couldn't be faked, nor acted up, nor created. This was real.

"It will be okay, I promise. Those things won't happen to you again. I'll make sure you don't feel helpless. I'll make sure you always feel wanted. I'll make sure you can express yourself however you want. Because everyone deserves that, and it honestly breaks my heart to see someone like this. I don't want you to feel bad, I just had my feelings bundled up like you did, I suppose. I'll make sure you don't have to feel like this again, but only if you want me to…" Shadow soothingly said with the most truth he had ever used since Maria had been with him.

"I would like that… But what you did still hurts! It can't just disappear into thin air!" Ryan replied, face still in Shadow's fluffy chest fur. He hated to admit it, but that hedgehog had somehow calmed him down from what had happened before. Now, he even wanted to forgive him, but it just wasn't that easy…

"I truly am sorry. But I don't know what else I can do to make this better. I'm not proud of what I did, but I can promise to never let it happen again."

"You expect me to trust that you're being sincere now?" Ryan questioned. "After how you tricked me last time?"

"I hope you can find the true you inside your heart to do that, yes."

Shadow was right. The real Ryan, buried underneath all the conflict, emotions of anger, intimidation, sadness, and confusion, and difficulties, wanted to forgive Shadow and just start over. Maybe if Shadow could show him how to trust once more…

"Shadow?" Ryan asked, trembled voice still muffled.

"Yes?"

"Do you think you could show me how to trust again?" he said, looking into crimson eyes.

"I believe I can. But that would depend on if you'll let me. You would need to leave the past as past, and let the future be the future, but live in the present to live life to the fullest and trust…"

"I will." Ryan rested his head back in it's original position. "But only of you help me."

"I promise."

Ryan wiped away his tears and finally smiled. Shadow had come through when he had to, just like friends do. He had promised that he'd do everything in his capacity to help me believe in him again. Ryan nuzzled into the hedgehog's gentle hold again, appreciating the effort that Shadow was putting in to comfort him.

And the hedgehog had been right. Instead of dwelling on the past, or worrying about the future, living in the present and learning the lesson that each day has to teach you is the way to live. Forgiving is better than holding a grudge, and much less forbidding.

With Shadow's hand still comfortingly rubbing Ryan's head, this was a very relaxing moment. They could stay here for a long time, just letting their friendship repair itself. Or…

"Aww, how adorable. Shads has a soft side!"

Sonic could show up and ruin everything.

Ryan raised his head to see Shadow roll his eyes and turn around with him to spot Sonic behind them, pretending to admire Shadow's kindness.

"Well, you guys seem to have sorted everything out, so let's go!" Sonic exclaimed. "Whatever…" Shadow mumbled as Sonic sped back inside.

"Alright, so we're all good? Forgetting what happened and starting fresh?" Shadow asked.

"Yes. We'll do our best." Ryan replied with a smile.

As they walked back together, Ryan corrected himself in his own thoughts,

Shadow, I will forgive, but I will never forget…

xXxXxXx

A/N: Wow, it's done! This was a difficult chapter to write, so I'm hoping it turned out alright for you guys!

I'd like to thank my dedicated readers for still reading after nine chapters! And also, check out ChaosController15 and Shadline the Wolf's stories. They are amazing, and Shadline's story is strangely familiar too!

Anyways, again, thanks for reading. Now this story officially has over 20 000 words!

Sonic: You're talking so much, we haven't got a chance yet!

Me: Well, get used to it. Remember to vote on who you want in next chapter's A/N sections, and I'll see you next time!

The more reviews I get the faster I update, and when I get to my 50th, I'll give you a double update! Also, that dare for the four characters is still open since reviewer 25 was anonymous, so reviewer 27 gets to! So go go go!

See you next time, and bless your face!

Please R&R! =P