Cat's POV:
~Writing in her online journal~
Today was my second day at my new school. And, let me tell you it was dreadful. I hate having to be around so many people. The boys are so rude. And, the girls pick on me. The only people I actually like are Robbie Shapiro and Beck Oliver. Beck called me last night. He wanted to talk. We talked for hours about everything. He's really sweet. And, Robbie. He is just the cutest thing. He is such a gentleman too. He helps me carry my books and brings me to almost all of my classes. I really like these two boys. How could you not like them? Who couldn't like them? I'll give you one answer. Jade. Jade hates Robbie. (Jade is the mean girl that yelled at me on the first day). She isn't mean to Beck, OF COURSE, because he is her boyfriend. (Which I only learned today.) He never told me he had a girlfriend. Jade yells at him though, whenever he is around me. Why can't he just have a friend? I don't get it. Ugh, high school annoys me so much. And as for James, well, that's another story.
~That night~
My phone was ringing on my bed. It took me ages to build up the strength to get up and answer it. I was so tired. I answered it and it was Beck. It was always Beck. He was the only person that actually called me. Robbie only texted.
"Come outside. Wear a jacket. We're going to the park." He said on the other line. I sighed. I wasn't really up to it. But, something about him made me want to listen to every word he said. I picked up my jacket and put it on, making sure it looked alright. I put on some make up and walked out the door, hanging up the phone as I made my way to him.
"Hi, Beck." I smiled. He took my hand.
"Let's go." He said, walking me to his car and opening my door. We drove for a matter of five minutes to the park. It was late. About 10. I wondered why he wanted to go to the park so late.
"So, what are we doing here?" I asked, smiling.
"I just want to get away for a while. You know? I just want to relax and talk to someone. Someone real. And...you're one of the most real people at this school. After just two days I feel like I really know you. Like we've been friends for years."
"I feel the same." I smiled. "So what do you want to talk about?"
"I don't really know." He laughed, looking up at the sky. "Can I ask a few questions?"
"Mhmm.." I nodded and smiled.
"Have you ever kissed a boy?" He turned to me. I looked straight and shook my head.
"Never?"
"Never."
"Do you want to?" He asked.
"I don't know..." I said in almost a whisper. "I think I'd be bad at it." I looked at him. He leaned closer to me and fixed the hair in front of my face.
"I doubt that." He leaned closer and pressed his lips to mine. I closed my eyes in slight shock and kissed him back. My heart was pounding and I felt dizzy. I could spell him. He smelled like peppermint and tobacco. His hair brushed against my cheek, making me giggle and I pulled away.
"What was that for?" I asked.
"Now you don't have to worry about it. You're a great kisser." He smiled. I could feel myself blushing.
"N-next question." I sat back slightly and he stayed bent over closer to me.
"Are you a virgin, Cat?" He said it slowly, deliberately. As if it were planned out, rehearsed. It took me a long time to answer him. My heart was beating so fast I could hear it. I sighed and brought my voice close to a whisper again.
"No..." I said, my smile became a slight frown.
"Who was your first time with?"
"None of your business!" I snapped.
"Sorry..." He said calmly. He turned my face to his and kissed me again. This time he kissed me harder, with more power. He was determined to do something and at the time I had no idea what it was. He pulled me to his seat on top of him and held me to himself, running his hands down my sides. I moaned quietly, running my hands through his hair. He flipped us so he was on top of me, without breaking the kiss. He ran his hand up under my shirt and i flinched at his freezing hands. He pulled off my hoodie and my shirt, then his. Then, as he was unbuckling his jeans my heart raced faster than before.
"What are you doing?" I whispered.
"Shhh." He said, silencing me, and he continued to remove his jeans. Then mine. Then my bra. Then his boxers. Then my underwear. I was shaking and I knew he could feel it.
"Stop..." I said when he was kissing my neck. "I don't want to do this." I said. He lowered the seat of his car down so it was laying flat. He shh'd me again.
"Trust me, it'll feel great cat." He pushed himself into me and I yelped. He put his hand over my mouth and told me I had to stay quiet. And, finally after what seemed like forever, I was breathlessly laying below him. And he was kissing me. And, after a few minutes I really started to think about what I had just done.
"I have to go home, Beck.." I bit my lip. He sighed, handing me my clothes and putting his on.
"Alright." He said and after we were both dressed he started driving. I started crying silently, looking out the window. I felt so ashamed in myself. My mother would not be happy with me. When we pulled up to my house he was acting a bit funny. I wiped my eyes and looked at him. "Bye, Cat." He said without even looking at me.
"Beck?" I asked. "Are you alright?"
"Can you just get out and go inside now?" My mouth dropped open. I frowned and got out of the car and spoke to him through the window.
"Are we even friends now, Beck?" He inched the car forward, starting to drive away and I caught up, back to the window. "So you trick me into having sex with you, then you try to act like we weren't friends?"
"Shut up, Cat!" He said. "Just shut up! You wanted to have sex with me and you know it."
"No I didn't." I shook my head. "So are we not friends anymore? Like tomorrow at school? Are you going to talk to me?" He looked away and sped off in his car. I sat on the curb and cried. I couldn't believe he would do that to me. He was a monster. Just like my brother.
I cried myself to sleep that night. Again.
