Disclaimer: I own no part of Victorious, or its characters. Just these words, this concept, this story. I make no bank off this sadly ;(


Welcome to the Fallout.

VI.

A piece of bread lodged itself into my throat, so I quickly grabbed my water bottle and chased it down with a large drink of water. I was too busy trying not to choke to death to hear the door to the theater open.

I coughed roughly and took some more water.

"Tori?"

I froze at the sound of the voice and the open water bottle slipped from my hand and splashed all over my legs.

The theater door closed as they spoke again.

"Are you okay?"

Every word stabbed me through the core.

I looked up slowly towards the intruder after I gained control and managed to swallow the piece of bread that had become stuck in my throat. They spoke again, this time in a harsher tone.

"Hello?" Her voice demanded. "Tori?" It was like nails on a chalkboard.

"Uh—" I couldn't even form a coherent response. The way she was looking at me had me extremely unnerved.

I expected her to lose her patience but surprisingly, she kept her cool yet continued to stare at me. "Are you alright?" She asked again.

I swallowed and found my voice. "I'm fine, thanks." It came out a little harsher than I had intended.

"Really? 'Cause you were coughing up a lung when I got in here. I was gonna laugh, but you were turning blue. I though we'd lost you for a second there." She smirked.

"I-I'm fine. Thanks for your concern, Jade." My insides twisted and my jaw clenched. I just wished she would leave.

"You don't look fine." She said bluntly, hiking her bag up higher on her shoulder.

I finally looked up at her eyes to see them devoid of any emotion that would clue me into how she was feeling at the moment or how to approach her. I wasn't sure if she was hinting at the fact that I had nearly needed the Heimlich and that the bottom half of my jeans were soaked, or that I looked so terrible lately, according to Trina. Which I guess was true to some extent, I was definitely paler, my hair was limper, yet my stomach—

"Why are you in here?" She demanded, cutting my thoughts off successfully.

"Because, I eat lunch in here…" I said, shakily standing up, dusting the crumbs off of my lap, though everything below my knees on my jeans was decorated with a wonderful pattern of water, the wet denim a shade darker blue than the dry.

She scoffed. "You sound so lame when you say that." She laughed, but stopped when she saw my serious face. "Wait, you're not kidding? You eat in here alone? Wow, talk about a fucking outcast…" She probably meant to mumble the last part to herself… wait. This was Jade . She said it to my face on purpose.

I bristled. "Well, I haven't been sitting with you guys at lunch, or haven't you noticed?" I asked, my tone noticeably icy.

"Ha, well actually I haven't, considering the fact that I haven't been sitting with you guys either. Beck and I sit somewhere else now." She smirked again.

My breath caught as she said his name.

She narrowed her eyes, seeing my almost imperceptible reaction.

"Yeah, Beck said he wanted some privacy with me. You know, away from everyone else," She was watching me. Testing me to see if I reacted. I stood statue-still and tried not to wince. She scrutinized me and I actually began to sweat under her intense stare.

"What are you doing here, then?" I blurted, eager to break the strange tension.

She raised her eyebrows. "Well, Tori, our next class is in here so I figured I'd be an overachiever and get here early. But it seems like you had the same idea." She paused. "Plus, Beck was really pissing me off."

I said nothing, keeping my face blank.

"'Oh, Jade, why was Beck angering you? I'd be ever so glad to help you!'" She mocked me in that southern belle accent of hers.

"What happened?" I sighed, out of fear of pissing her off more than a genuine desire to help. Which I did not possess.

"Well, Vega. If you must know…" She trailed off as she stepped up on stage to be level with me and stood planted in front of me, downstage center.

I tried to appear indifferent.

"He's been acting really weird lately," She said.

"How?" I obliged.

"I don't know. He's been distant... And really pissy with me. He just snapped at me for no reason. It's like he's on his guy-period, or something. I don't know," She repeated. "I just don't trust it." She said and stared at me again.

"Jade, can I ask you a question?" I asked hesitantly.

"Whatever."

"Why are you talking to me about this? You don't even like me. When I saw you in the hall the other day you looked like you wanted to murder me." I said, before I could lose the nerve.

To my surprise, she laughed. "Well, my bad, Tor-Tor. I was mad as hell that day. I would've been like that to anyone." She answered, yawning.

"That doesn't answer my question though. Why are you telling me this?" I asked, getting annoyed.

"Well… I figure since you're the resident martyr, you'd be willing to help me out. I need… I need your help, Vega." She answered honestly.

"With what…?" I had a bad feeling about this.

"Okay, so I'll just get to the point. I have a feeling Beck is cheating on me. And I want you to find out who with." She said, still burning a hole through me with her eyes.

I opened my mouth to protest immediately.

"Ah-ah-ah, before you say no, think of this as the cherry on top. I mean, you wanted us to be friends, right? And if you do this for me, it'll prove to me that you're willing to have my back, in all sorts of ways. So, are you down?"

NO. OF FUCKING COURSE NOT I'M NOT DOWN, YOU CRAZY BITCH. I was about to decline, again, because honestly, I didn't actually give a shit if Jade was my friend or not. Not like I once did. Too much had happened, to where she and I could never have a healthy friendship. And the thought of her thinking of me as a friend, an equal… that just made me feel ten times worse about everything. I didn't deserve her as a friend after what happened… But that wasn't exactly something I was willing to explain to her. I sighed. "How do I even do this?" I pinched the bridge of my nose.

She grinned wickedly. "Just pay attention, duh. If you see anything fishy, let me know. Also, I think I'm going to make him sit with everyone at the lunch table again. And you should too." She said.

"No, Jade, I'd rather eat in here—" I started, but she cut me off.

"Tori." She said and looked me deep in the eyes. "I think you should sit at the table with us." And then she gave me a look that made my stomach churn. It wasn't a friendly glance.

I cannot believe I'm about to agree to this. Why the hell do I have to do this for her? Maybe because you ran around behind her back. The nastier part of my subconscious answered. I swallowed my pride and steeled my nerves. "Fine. I'll try," I said and she grinned triumphantly. But then she looked serious again, but didn't say anything. Her eyes were suddenly very stormy, and I saw a raw amount of rage within them. I felt bumps raise on my arms at this hostile look. She gave me the once over, quickly and then seemed to dismiss me.

"Good choice." She said in an eerily calm voice, and hopped off stage to take a seat as the bell to dismiss lunch chimed its unusual sound. I took a huge breath of relief.

Eventually, kids from our acting class began to trickle in from lunch and I remembered to grab my trash and climb off the stage slowly. A few of them looked at me funny, but I didn't have the energy to do anything about it.

I leaned against the stage, suddenly exhausted. I thought about my new 'assignment' and felt a wave of nervousness. I didn't want to do this. I really didn't. It was stupid, Jade should just keep her eye on her own boyfriend. Well, clearly she didn't do such a great job at that in the past... I shoved that thought to the back of my brain.

I made myself look at him when he walked in the room. Though it was impossible not to; his presence just commanded my attention. And I think it always would.

I saw him absentmindedly walk in and automatically take a seat next to Jade, who was winking deviously at me as I gave a fake half-smile and nod. I looked at his face for what felt like the first time in ages. His beautiful, haunting face... My chest tightened, though surprisingly it wasn't as unbearable as I'd imagined. I saw her elbow him in the ribs and he rolled his eyes but draped his arm over the back of her chair, though not touching her, I noticed. Suddenly, out of nowhere I got a flash to when he held my hand as we were laying on top of his car, looking up at the stars on the beach. My throat tightened, and I tried to force those memories out of my head as well.

And at that moment, the worst (or maybe the best?) thing happened. Maybe he felt someone staring, or he wanted to look anywhere except for his "loving" girlfriend. But nonetheless he looked up from his PearPhone, and right at me. And instead of looking away as fast as possible as I had been doing lately, I held the almost excruciating eye contact. I briefly heard someone call my name, but I ignored it. I needed this. I needed him to see how fucking badly he hurt me, and how I was suffering the consequences of both of our stupidity. I needed him to see how I could hardly keep it together anymore, and how much self-loathing I had pent up inside me. I needed him to see how mad I was at him for dropping me and acting like nothing ever happened. I needed him to see that his girlfriend was crazy. I needed him to see that I wanted to tell him everything but I didn't have the balls to. I needed him to see that Andre was my only anchor anymore. I needed him to see I missed our good times, no matter how impromptu we went about them. I needed him to see the truth. And for a brief minute, I could almost imagine I saw him trying to say something with his eyes… I furrowed my brow. Wait, was he...? Maybe I wasn't just seeing things...

I immediately came to my senses as Sikowitz slammed the door to the Black Box. I jumped, and the spell was broken. I blinked, and saw that he had already looked away, playing on his PearPhone. My chest aches terribly in that instant as I went to sit near Andre in the back who apparently had been trying to get my attention for a few minutes. I nodded my apologies, and hung my head, trying to get past the stinging feeling I felt. I didn't hardly register Andre grabbing my hand, and for a second that actually made me feel worse. Andre... I wanted so badly for it to be Andre. That would make this mess a whole lot easier. But no, of course it wasn't Andre. Life never worked out that easily.

Yeah, this was definitely going to be harder than I thought.


Author's Note: Well hey guys (:

It's been a while, hasn't it? I hope you all didn't lose interest. I got a random desire to update this.

*If you're confused as to what's going on here's the situation: Jade is feeling more jealous and suspicious of Beck than usual, and has decided to get Tori to figure out why he's been acting so weird because she helped mend their relationship once before but, little does she know, Tori's the one who has everything to do with it. So there's that. Also, Tori is trying not to be so depressed about everything. She's making slow progress. But she has her relapses. Like random flashbacks. I actually included that idea from personal experiences. Random flashbacks are the worst... sigh. Anyways, she's got Andre as her support system so hopefully he'll be able to help her through this shit, although she doesn't share absolutely everything with him. She recognizes she's been self-destructive, and is trying to change that. She doesn't want to hate herself or, an extension of herself anymore. Also, Beck is feeling extremely conflicted. He knows something's up and he's wrestling with trying to figure out what the right thing to do in the situation is. But his feelings are more of a mystery, because this story is primarily in Tori's POV. I know we haven't seen Cat or Robbie yet, but to be honest I don't know how much they're going to play a part in this story; I guess we'll see.
- SOOO basically, where we're at right now is where the little subplots are beginning to form. And to be honest again, I wasn't sure if I'd have any. I thought I was going to focus on the Bori angstdramaangst but that can get tiresome.
So, anyways. Thoughts? Questions? Suggestions? Go ahead and leave it in a review. Got an urgent question? PM me.

Thanks you guys. Love you all

Next chapter soon I hope.

-PP.