A/N: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling, and all song lyrics belong to Breaking Benjamin.

This will be a Draco/Harry pairing, but it will be slow coming.

Suggested self-harm and abuse.

Thoughts

Letters and books


After finishing his prefect rounds, Draco yawned and left for the Slytherin common room. Walking, he thought back to this morning. Who would have thought that the Golden Boy would have a journal just lying around. He was just asking for someone to steal it.

Reaching the Fifth-year dorm, Draco changed into green silk pajamas, grabbed the journal and got into bed. Pulling the curtains around him, he cast a silencing charm. I don't want them waking up if Potter has some sort of noise security hex. Getting comfortable, Draco picked up the journal and opened it.


Harry was really getting worried. What if someone found it? What if it was stolen? Oh my gods! He spent a long sleepless night worrying over the fate of the book, his forearms itching from all the stress and pressure.


Opening the journal, Draco was surprised at the lack of security hexes. If it was his, there would have been hexes all over the thing. Looking at the first page, he was surprised that there were quite a lot of charms on the inside of the journal. Deciding to read the entry before checking out the charm, Draco read on.

July 3, 1995

I can't believe I actually got this book like Hermione suggested. Writing down my problems isn't going to make them go away. Sharing my feelings with a book isn't going to get rid of Voldemort again and bring back Cedric. This is a waste of time.

July 5, 1995

Okay, I'm bored. I told Hedwig to stay with Ron when she left with my letter. I don't want her to be locked in her cage again. It's bad enough that I'm trapped in this hell hole, she doesn't need to be stuck here too. Without her here there is no one to talk to, so I might as well use this book. Don't want to lose my sanity or have the Dursley's idiocy rub off on me after all.

July 6, 1995

This summer is turning out to be the worst so far. My daily "punishment" was so much worse than it normally is. Apparently Uncle Vernon was late for work today because he was kept awake by my screaming. Like it's my fault I have nightmares of my parent's murderer coming back to life and a friend of mine dying suddenly right next to me. That bastard is lucky I can't do magic in the summer or he would be the one trying to stop the bleeding.

July 7, 1995

Another nightmare about Cedric. They keep coming and I can't stop them. Maybe I deserve the "punishments". He wouldn't have died if I hadn't suggested we take the cup together and have a joint Hogwarts win. It's all my fault.

Draco blinked as he finished the page. Potter… abused? That didn't make sense. Wasn't he spoiled because of his fame? This book had to be wrong. Looking at the blank page opposite the one he had just read, Draco touched the page. As he touched it, music started playing and words started to appear on the once blank page. Potter wrote music?

Here I stand
Helpless and left for dead

Close your eyes
So many days go by
Easy to find what's wrong
Harder to find what's right

I believe in you, I can show you
That I can see right through all your empty lies
I won't stay long in this world so wrong

Say goodbye
As we dance with the Devil tonight
Don't you dare look at him in the eye
As we dance with the Devil tonight

Trembling
Crawling across my skin
Feeling your cold dead eyes
Stealing the life of mine

I believe in you, I can show you
That I can see right through all your empty lies
I won't last long in this world so wrong

Say goodbye
As we dance with the Devil tonight
Don't you dare look at him in the eye
As we dance with the Devil tonight

Hold on, hold on

Say goodbye
As we dance with the Devil tonight
Don't you dare look at him in the eye
As we dance with the Devil tonight

Hold on, hold on

Goodbye

That was Potter's voice… What the hell? Since when does he sing?

Draco had no idea that Potter even had a creative bone in his body, let alone able to write stuff like this. Feeling a little confused, he closed the book and placed it in his nightstand. Locking the drawer with the strongest locking spell he knew, Draco also put a hex on the drawer so he would know if someone tried to get in. His last thoughts before falling asleep were 'maybe I don't know Potter as well as I thought I did.'


A/N 2: The song in this chapter is Dance With the Devil by Breaking Benjamin.