Disclaimer: Twilight Saga belongs to SM.


Chapter 6 -

Fell in Love

Sometimes in life you run across a love unknown
Without a reason it seems like you belong
Hold on dear life
Don't go off running from what's due
I became somebody through loving you

(Dear Life - Anthony Himilton)

I wanted to start on dinner as soon as I returned home. I know there wasn't anything in the house, so Mike couldn't have eaten anything substantial and he would be hungry from the way he had prowled the fridge. He used to be kind and considerate, though now all that had changed but the crux of his being remained the same. Despite everything I still loved him.

I decided to make his favorite tonight. I wasn't doing it to soften him up; I wasn't that much of a fool to think tactics like those would work. Of course it wouldn't work. I just wanted to make him happy. It hurt me to see him hurting. It hurt me to see him so aloft and distant. I knew I could never make him happy again. That just killed me inside but just because that was an iron clad fact did not mean I should stop wanting to make things right between us. Maybe I would try till my last breath to make that possible. Because I knew I would remain broken unless I fixed Mike. I would be a mess until I cleaned this all up. I wanted to make things right between us. I wanted to make us right. I wanted to forget everything. I wanted him to forgive me.

Yet the rational part of me knew that wasn't possible, I would never forget and he would never forgive.

The dreams wouldn't go away. The torturous thoughts wouldn't go away. He would never leave my heart. It was occupied. I would never be able to give Mike all of it. I would always be holding back, it wasn't up to me to do otherwise. What I wanted and what was were two entirely different things. What I wanted was to belong to one person, him.

Love was cruel. Love was insatiable. Love was incorrigible. Love was forever. Love never went away. When all else vanished, it remained, it lingered, even after hate seeped, everything broke away, all other memories faded, yet it stood; staunch.

Love did not go away just because you wanted it to. Love was persistent.

Love was irreplaceable.

How then was it my fault when I erred? It was loves fault! Love, which just happens out of the blue with such poignant force that it knocks your breath away, and leaves you dangling in mid-air with every emotion revised, to fit it accordingly.

I shouldn't be in love, after all these years; after loving other people, after getting married. Yet it was beyond me to control that. I could, maybe, control who I loved, but it wasn't in my hands to control who I feel in love with. And I just did. That un-fateful day when he sat foot in my Writing Composition class, six years ago, my world turned upside down. The sun was no longer the centre of the universe, he was. My world starting revolving around him, my every thought was occupied by him. I didn't pre-plan it. I didn't fathom for it to happen, but it did. I feel in love with Edward Cullen.


A/N: Just to clear the confusion, chapter five was set five years ago.