Episode Sixx; Bffs, forever!

"Her is your picza, Mr. jabba," said Bobby Fett to the worm man jabba. Jabba's full name was Jabba the hut and bobby hwas a pizza man so they worked together to form the firts space Pizza Hut.
"Gurgle gurgle" said Jabba. He was not very good at talkin so they mostly did janitor things at the pizza hut. They're pizza hut was on a giant cruise boat on Tattoonine so after people got their nine tattos they could come and eat pizza and forget about how much it hurt afterwards.
Bobby handed Jabba the most the most important pizza bock of all. This one was verry big and Hand Soap-flavored because inside was not a pizza, but Hand soap!
"Whatever u do dont ipen dat box Jabba" warned Bobby shakin his figner.
"Ok" said Jaba but he actually just gurgled. Bobby was his boss and he ddn't want to get firred or else he wouldnt be able to get a nother job because he was big and ugly and couldnt' talke.
Then the shop opened qand in walked a Cewbacco in a trencoat and hat with C-3Po and all the otghers on her shoulders.
"Hello I would like one hand soap flavored pizza" she asked.
"Gurgle gurgy" salt Jabba and we went to get the big pea box.
Suddenly COUGCH!1!
"What was that?" thought Jabba and he turned around and the nice man's hat was coughin.
"Pretty suspicious!" he said.
"Be quite CPthree-0!" said Rad-Ds, on top of CCP0's head. "You'll ruin the mission!"
"Sorry, gazumptight!" he said, blessing himself.
"Geez, CP30, stop being so gay!" said Lucas. and CP30 was sad because he was gay.
"Gurgle gurgled gurglin" said JAbba and he held up a sing that said "TEN DOLLERZ PLEASE" excapt the R was backwards because he was dumb.
"Okay sounds great" exclaimed cHewbacco I will just get out my space wallet now... "And she fished around in her trenchpocket but it wasn't actually her because Lucas was the arm\
"Here it is." she said, but when she pulled it out it wasn't her wallet it
was C3PO!
"Ow my fanny" he said because fanny is a gay word for gays."
There cover was blown! Jawa sounded the alarm and bobby fett came in the room.
"What is dgoin on here!" he cried.
"You are so stupid CPCO" said! Rad-Ds, so Rad-Ds took out his black lightsaber and breakedanced abunch of stormtroopers to death because they were on vacation at the pizza hut boat and NOT wearin their no-die armor.
And Lucas jumped out of the arm and used his lightsaver to attack Bobby Fett.
"Hah! You can't follow me over here," said Bobby, heading into the pool deak, "because this is the pool deak and lifesabers don't work underwater!" So bobby jumped into the pool except he missed and jumped into a sand monster hole and died.
"Looks like that's the end of Boby!" said Lucas laughed!
Juts then Chewbacco opened the pizza box and out popped Hand Soap.
Hand soap!
And they made out and kissed because they were in love.
"I luv u hand Soap" he said
"I luv u Chewbacca" she said.

Suddenly the mail bird came and dropped off a newspaper.
"What does it say?" asked Rad-Ds.
"Oh no!"
Gasps!
"Dark Vader and General Graveus have built another Darth Star!"
Gasps!
"And the Dark Emperor is coming himself to the grand opening party!"
GASPS!
"We'd better go tell Yogurt about this" said Lucus.

-

Meanwile on teh Darthe Star II General Gimli and his best friend DArk Vader were dressed in their finest Sunday-go-to meetin' clothes greeting people to the new Darth Star Gala, the swankiest party in all of the galaxy.
"Welcome, kshhhh," said Dark Vader, "So glad you could come." In walked tie-fighter.
"Can I take your coat, tie-fighter?" asked General Grinch.
"No, but u can take my TIE!" he joke.
Ohohohohoho they laughed fancilly. It was the best party ever.
Suddenl all the lights went out except for one which was still on and pointing at thte top of the Darth Star stairs. A red droyd in a tuxedo came out to announce.
"Anouncing his madjesty, Dark Emperor!" And at the top of the stairs appeared the Dark Emperor. Gasp! went the crowd and they all put down their caviar and wine so they could bow.
"Greetings, subjects." he coughed. The Dark Empror was two hundred years old and he looked like a wrinkly marshmallow but people like him anyway because looks aren't everything you know.
"Hello, Dark Emperor" Greeted Dark Vader.
"Hello son," said Dark Emperor to Dark Vader.
"He calls me son because his is my adoptave dad, kshhhh," said Dark Vader to General Grassland, "That is why both of our names have Dark in them. Dark is our last name but we say it first just like Japansese people."
"I know Dark," whipsered General Greebens, "I was there when you were adopted."
"Oh rite. Kshhh." "We have been friends for a really long time."
"Yep."
"Stop your whisperin' over dere, boys" said Dark Emperor. "It's time to party!" And the Dark Emperor spiked the punch and they all began to boogie.

-

Lucas and Rad-Ds teleported onto Daygoby to tell Yogurt about the Dark Star 2, but when they got there and got to his hobbit hole house noeone was inside.
"Where is Yogurt?" they asked.
Over in the corner of Daygoby was a gravestone.
"Here lied Yoda: The best dancing Jedi puppet ever."
Except Yogurt was dislexic so when he wrote it he spelled everything wrong.
"Olh no," said Lucas, "How will we warn Yogurt now!"
"I know! Ghost vision" said Rad-Ds and he turned on his ghost vision.
Goats everywhere!
But none were Yogurt!
"Hello Yogurt," said Lucas."
"Lucas, hello" Yogurtt responded. As usual Lucas couldn't understand anything he said because hew as dislexic, but he pretended anyway because he was polite.
"I am here to warn you that Dark and General have maked new Dark Star."
"No, oh! Go and talk with your dad, you must. Convince him to Convince him to destroy the Dark Star and the Empire, you must!"
"Okay!" said Lucas and he and Rad-Ds flew off.

-

Meanwhile the rest of the rebels were on Endor at the anual Rebel picnic.
"Pass the potato salad!" laughed Obi-One, king of rebels. He was havin a good time.
"Here you go!" said Admiral Trap, and he passed them.
"Can you hand ME some of that chicken?" aksed Black Guy.

(OOC: OKAY so it turns out that SOME PEOPLE think I am a RACICST, which is totally untrue! and told me I used a lot of "offensive stereotypes" last time with Black Guy, so he's NOT BLAK ANYMORE OKAY! I decided to make his character better so he's white now so now it's not racist anymore)

"No broblem," said admiral Trap handing him some fried chickens.
"Thnaks!" and Black Guy ate them in one bite with his huge lips.
It was great picnic. Hand soap and Chewbacco came late because they were too busy kissing on Hand Soap's giant falcon, but they brought the lemonade.
"I've got the lemonade, chaps!" said CP30, but then he tripped over somethign and spilled it.
"C2PO1!" said Chewbacco while kissin
"I'm sorry..."
"He was probably distracted by all of the MENS BUTTS he was lookin at because he is gay so he tripped," giggled handsoap.
And the whole camp laughed at harridson ford's joke.
"No!" lied C3P0, "I tripped over this!" And they all looked up to see whatg it was. It was a gigant chain that was tied around a tree. The other end was tied to the Dark Star!
"This must be where they parked the DArk star for hte party!" said Obi-One. "We have to get in there and stop them!" So all the rebels took their picnic and went up the chain. At the top was a Stormtrooper in a tuxedo.
"Invitations please." he requested.
"I do not have an invitation." admited Obi-one.
"Then u cannot get in! this is a private party."
"oh well..." said Rebels, and they all went home.
"We need to find a way into that party! said Chewbacco," "but HOW!"

-

At that time Lucas and Rad D's appeared next to the Dark Star and walked up to the fromnt door.
"I'm here to see DArk Vader," said :Lucas.
"Do u have invitation?" asked Stormtrooper.
"I dunno." Rad, did we get invitation?"
"Yeah," said Rad-2D2, "I used my Ghsots Vission to take it from some ghosts. Here you go"
"Go on in" pointed the Stormtrooper.
They walked inside. Everywhere was party.
"Wow, what a swank party," cooled Rad-Ds. "I haven't been to a prty this fancy in a while."
"Quick, let's find Vader!" ushered Lucas and they went.
Vader was over in the corner playin pin the tail on the donkey with General Gribbons. he was winning because he kept his eyes open the whole time but no one could tell cause he was wearin a helmet.
"Vader!" cried Lucas.
"Son!" surprised Dark Vader.
"That's right, I have come to defeate you!"
"Son!" DArk hugged his robot arms around his song, "I missed you. Kshhhh. Quick, let's go do son things like fishing!" and then they went to fish leaving Rad-Ds with General Gelato.
"Cool party."
"Thanks."

-

Meanwhile down on Endor the rebels were coming up with a plan.
"I have no idea what we should do," said Hand Soap.
"I know," said Chewbacca. "Let's make out." so they kissed and rolled around and kissed s'more.
They were stumped.
Sudddenly a monkey came down from the sky and sat next to C3POo.
"Hello," he said to the monkey.
"that monkey wont listen to you because you'r GAY" said One-Obi and everyone laughed. C3PO cried and his cheecks began to rust. But as it turned out the MONKEY was gay to!
"Are you gay?" asked C3P?O
"Ook" sayed the monkey.
"Okay let's do it." And C3PO and the monkey had sex right then and there. After, the monkey called all of his friends down and they were called Ewoks and they all had big penises and C3P0 sucked everyone one of them so they all begame friends. The rebels did not watch because it was too gay for them.
"Guys, the monkeys gave me a ticket for the party!" said CP3O.
"Great work Hand soap!" said One-Obi taking the ticket, "But we can only send one rebel. Who do we send...?"
"I have an idea!" ideaed Chewbacco.

"Hello, welcome to Dark star, do you have an invitation?"
"I sure do!" said Chewbacco. She was dressed in the same trenchcoat and stranding on Hand Soap's and Black Guy's shoalder's. "Here you go." Hand swop awkwardly handed him the invite.
"...Hey," said the storktrooper, "You guys aren't REBELS are you?"
"Of cuorse not! Ehehehehe! FRRRRRRrreeeeee! See? Rebels don't Reeeeeeee. Only woolies do and I am a woolie not a rebel."
"Oh okay go on in."
And they went in.

-

"I have told you Dark Vader, I do not want to fish, I want to fight!" said Lucus holding a fishin rod.
"No! We have to do dad son things because I have been a bad dad and we have to make up for the lost times. Kshhhh."
"But I don't want to fish."
"Do you want to play some baseball? Kshhh."
"No."
"Kshh... do you want to go fishing?"
"No!"
"Sorry I do not know any other things dads do. Kshhh. I have never had a son before. Except for Luke and Leia I guess but they don't count they are still on vacation on the bahamas. Kshhhh."
"You sure Kshhh alot." Luke observed.
"That is because I need kshhhh a life breather kshhhhh inhaler or else I will die kshhh."
"DIE, eh? Lucas had an idea.
Meanwhile General Griccing and Rad-Ds were having a dance contest in the middle of the Dark Star and all of the fancy storktroopers and Empires around them were watching. They were both pretty good. Even the Dark Empeoror stopped his wine tasting to watch.
"What a fine show." he chortle-laughed.
"Freeze, suckahs!" shouted Black guy, jumping out of Chewbacco's trenchcoat. he took out his blaster and held it sideways.
"There goes the neighborhood!" Dark Emperor joked. Everyone laughed, because if they didn't it was the law that he could kill them.
"You can't beat us rebels, said Hand soap" jumping out of the coat.
"Yeah!" said chewbacco.
"Yeah!" said admiral trap.
"Whoop!" said CP30, rolling out of the coat and landing on his face withh his butt and fanny pack in the air.
"C3PO!" they all said, even the Empires. They had all heard of his gayness.
"What are YOU doing here! ?"
"I wanteed to help."
"You can help by going home!" said Rad-Ds.
"YEAH!"
"I shall get rid of him," said Dark Empire.
"No master, allow me." and General Grenddy picked up C3PO after putting on some gloves (he did not want to catch the gay) and he threw him out the window.
"Who should I take care of next?" asked General Dempster?
"No, please," said the DArk Emperor, lighting up his hands with lightning, "Let me have some FUN!"
Gulp!

-

Otherwheres Lucas had taped Dark Vader up to a wall with the force and stuck him there.
"Kshhh... are you sure this is what fathers and sons do, Lucas? Kshhhhh"
"I am definitely sure!"
"Well that's good, kshhhh. Now we have bonded!"
"Bonded YOU!" Lucas quipped. "I lied! And now you are stuck to a wall so you will die and not get your inhaler in time!"
"GASP!" Dark Vader was sad. He really wanted to be a good dad and now he was going to die. This was the worst day EVER.

Actually I like Dark Vader more than Lucas now that I think about it so now HE is the main character instead of him.

"How do I get out of this one!" said Dark as Lucas laughed evilly. "I know! Kshhhhh. Kshhh..." And Dark took out his General call wich called all generals to his aid and he blew it.
"Tweet!"
"what was that!" asked Lucas.
"Kshhh... Now General Gruntilda will come can he has my inhaler! He will save me! Kshhhh!"
"Not if I have anything to say about it!" lucas said, and he took out his red lightstick because he was evil now.
Meanwhile in the other room Dark Emperor and General Giordano's were fighting all of the rebels and the party people were running away in scary.
"Hahahaha! Take this!" said Emperor, and he lightninged Chewbacco's coat and all the rebels exploded out of it.
"Good shot, boss!" said the general. Suddenly he herd a noise.
"Tweet!:"
It was the General call!
"Boss I have to go Dark needs me" said General Gerbilmeat.
"Okay," coucghed the old miser, "but first u need to kill most of these rebels."
"Ok you got it." So General Ginglebells took out his four lightsticks and stabbed Chewbacco and Hand Soap and Black Guy and Admiral Fishman and King one-Obi and Jeremy Wilkenson all in the face and they all died.
"Now I have to go!" so he took his inhaler and left."
"Hahaaha, perfect!" said Lucus, Everything is going to plan!" Justs then General Grundyonamundy came in with his lightsticks.
"I'll save you, best friend!" he said, and he sliced him down from the wall. "Shall we fight him together?"
"Thanks, no, Kshhhh, he is my son so just knock him out."
"Okay."
"Just try!" and they had to try really hard. It was the best firght ever because Luke was the best Jedi ever, but Dark Vader used to be the bets Jedi ever and General Gingerbread had six lifesticks so it was a pretty even fight. Eventually General Astoldbyginger and Dark Vader managed to combine their power to go Super Sayan 2 and they used the side of their lightsticks to knock Lucas out.
"Kshhhhhhh! Kshhhhh!"
"Calm down, best friend," said General Gotye, I've got your medicine. His chest cavity opened and out came an inhaler on a stick. Dark vader bent over and drank it.
"Ahh, much better."
"Quick, we'd better go help Boss Emperor witht hose Rebels."
"Ok."

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" laughed the Black Emperor, firing his lightning and force sticks in all directions. Many rebels died. "Nothing can stop me!" But then something DID stop him!
It was Chewbacco! She threw him off of the tower and down into the land of gay monkeys where he was sexed forever. "Nooooooo!"
"Ha ha!" she laughed.
"I can't believ e we survived!" said Black guy.
"Yeah, it's a good thing C3PO was here because he is made of no die armor and we all took a part of him and blocked the stabs."
"Yay!" they all said. Except Jeremy wilkonson because sadly there was not enough armor for him.
In came Dark VAder and General Gerhambur.
"Oh no, the Emperor is dead! Kshhhhhh"
"The Empire is over!"
"There's just one last thing to do!" said R (Rad-Ds is too hard to type so he is just R now) and he and Hand Soap and all their friends and Black guy frlew into the core of the dark star and pressed the "blow up" button and flew away.
"Rebels win!" they cried, flying off into the distance. The stormtroopers and tiefighers began to run around and panic.
"What do we do!" asked General Ghostintheshell?
"Kshhh, calm down everyone. We made a "save all the peopel on the Dark Star in case it blows up button" after we made the "dark star blow up" button just in case."
"Why did you make that button in the first place?" asked Governer Tarkin.
Dark Vader shot him through the face with this Force beam.
"Quick, everyone off the ship! General Grincent, come with me! It takes 2 peaople to press that button (it is very big)"
"Okay, best friend!"
And they went.
"Not so fast!" said Lucas and he shot his lightsaber gun right through General Grizzly's chest and the inhaler explolded. "Now you'll die forever, dad!" ahahahaha!" And lucas jumped away.
"Dark Vader! Oh no!"
"Kshhhh, it's okay, General Gaston, but right now he have to stop dat force bomb!
And so they went to the control room and jumped on the button together and all the stormtroopers and tie fighters in suits were saved because they were shot out of the Dark Star.
"Best friend, we need to get out of here and get you another inhaler with hasty!" shouteed General Grunge.
"No."
"Why NOT!"
"Because it is impossible to get out... kshhhh it is too big..."
"It's not that long of a walk."
"No... the Dark Star is still going to explode! With us inside ob it! Kshhhh!"
Oh

-

Rebels' POV

Congratulations, everyone" said Obi-One, "The empire is defeated an I promote you all to king of rebels."
And they all cheered.
"Black chicken for everyone!" yelled black guy.
But R and Lucas would have none of the chicken. They were too busy flightin' off looking for adventure int heir dance-mobile for happilly ever after as the Dark Star II exploded in the background.

TheEnd!

BONUS SCENE:

The lights of the Darth Star's core flickered on and off wildly to the cacophony of warning sirens. They were a little like stars, Dark noticed, twinkling in the night. He longed to see the wild expanse of space again, but he knew it was not to be. This would have to do.

"Is there nothing we can do?" asked the General? He too was looking at the flashing lights. Dark gave a heavy sigh through his respirator.

"I'm afraid not, old friend." Another loud breath. It had been too long since his last breath through the insulator. "But we've saved or citizens, haven't we? The Storktroopers and Tie-fighters will live to see another day."

"And us?"

"No. We will not"

"I see."

Something exploded a room over. The smoke began to billow into the core, but neither of them noticed. The general laughed through his shaking, white armor.

"It seems like such a long time ago... that day the two of us met on Naboon. We've shared a lifetime together, you know?" Dark chuckled.

"I don't regret a moment of it," he said.

"Neither do I."

"I'm glad I could share such a long, fruitful life with you, old friend."

"Perhaps we can share another, somewhere in the afterlife," the general mused.

"Hah! Haah... Yes. Perhaps we shall. I can only hope so."

"Ten seconds until self destruction," the Star's computer warned.

"Goodbye, old friend," the general.

"Goodbye."

Dark Vader grabbed General Grevious's white, metalic hand in his black robot glove and held it tightly as the Darth Star exploded in a great ball of flame, taking the two best friends and the last dreams of the Empire with it.

~Fin