Half the Battle
-23 BBY-
A small, tri-wing Eta-class shuttle soared over a thick forest of a temperate world. The craft was painted in the classic red and white color scheme favored by the Jedi order. After a short time, the shuttle descended into a clearing in the forest and touched down.
Two figures in Jedi robes exited the shuttle, both Bothan, one older and one younger: Kai Hudorra and Mashir Ivei'lya.
The forest of this world was tolerable enough: cool, but not cold, with mostly clear skies that weren't threatening to dump rain. Even so, it was still a great relief to be off that tiny, cramped excuse of a shuttle. But yet, there seemed to be something intangible about this world that was, at least for Mashir, a little strange.
"Here we are! Myrkr, homeworld of the Neti." Kai announced with a motion to the surrounding forest, "You do remember the Neti, don't you?"
"The Force sensitive tree people, I know." Mashir answered, trying hard not to be annoyed, or uneasy about the oddities she felt from this planet, "Master T'ra Saa is one of them."
"Many believe that Ryyk is the Neti homeworld, but that's not entirely true." Kai continued, apparently oblivious to his Padawan's troubles, "The Neti left this world over four thousand years ago, abandoning it entirely, and established a permanent colony on Ryyk instead. Can you imagine why?"
"Not really." Mashir answered, her disinterest concealing a hidden anxiety, "Let's just meet our contact, do our business, and get out of here. This place feels... off."
Hudorra shrugged, "Suit yourself, Mashir, but a little knowledge can go a very long way."
"This isn't going to be another one of those 'knowing is half the battle' speeches, is it?" Mashir drawled, dreading yet another dull lecture on the value of knowledge. This wasn't the time or the place for it, not when... something.
"No, not this time." Kai assured her as he pulled out a datapad and checked it over, "The coordinates where we meet our contact are just a little ways south of here, let's go–"
"Master, wait!" Mashir implored, "I've got a bad feeling about this."
"Oh?"
"I– I can't feel the Force." she stammered out. She was shaking, terrified, "I can't sense anything. I feel... helpless."
"Don't lose focus, Mashir." Kai placed a hand on her shoulder, and scanned the area around him with suddenly keen eyes, "There is a pack of vornskr hounds is closing in on us."
"Where?" Mashir asked.
Kai waited, and listened for a moment, "Everywhere."
"What do we do?"
"What would you normally do?"
"Trust the Force?" Mashir answered, unsure.
It was quiet, but there was a faint series of noises arising that weren't there before: rustle of foliage, a pant of beastly breath, muffled footfalls.
"Hmm..." Hudorra's attention stayed on his environment, watching for the vornskr hounds, but kept a calm tone with his Padawan, "Do you remember your very first lessons, when you were blindfolded and asked to trust the Force when your other senses failed you?"
Mashir nodded, still trying to look for the hounds that were circling them. "That was one of Master Yoda's teachings, that we should always trust in the Force."
"I'm sorry to say it, but even even our dear Grandmaster Yoda can be wrong once in a while." Kai replied with a short chuckle, "This, right now, is the exact inverse of that lesson: the Force does not exist here, and it cannot help you, but you are not helpless. You still have your eyes, your ears, your knowledge, your combat training, and your instincts. Trust in them instead."
And there was one of them: a dark shadow skulking through the trees, nearly silent, nearly invisible, but there nonetheless. The vonskr were circling, drawn toward the two Jedi, but waiting patiently for their opportunity to strike like true predators.
"So, any tips for taking out these vornskr things?" Mashir asked,
"Go for the tail." Hudorra lifted his lightsaber from the belt at his waist, and answered, "The vornskr will lose their aggressiveness if it's severed, and they will flee."
"It's like you say, Master: knowing is half the battle, right?" she took her own lightsaber in hand in a firm, controlled grip.
"Indeed, but only half." With a flick of the wrist and a gleam in his eye, Kai's lightsaber sprung to life with a humming olive green blade.
There was a rustle and sharp snap of twigs, then one of the shadows leapt out from a cluster of bushes straight at Hudorra. The Bothan jedi ducked and slid on his back under the flying form. He kicked up at it to force it to overshoot, and made a sweeping slash as it passed, slicing into something. The shadow made a yelp as it landed, stumbling on the forest floor.
The shadow turned out to be a large and fearsome dark furred hound: a vonskr. The animal staggered up, letting out a wounded, oddly pathetic whine from such a visually intimidating creature. The hound licked its stump of a tail, still smoking from Kai's slash, and slunk off into the depths of the–
"Mashir! Focus!" Kai shouted.
Another vonskr came charging out of the surrounding underbrush, snarling as it came at Mashir. She had only moments to act; moments which felt all the shorter without the help of the Force. In that moment, Ivei'lya leapt up and forward, over the charging vonskr hound, which managed to bite down on her robes, catching the young Bothan mid-leap. She thumped down onto the animal's back, and barely activated her classic blue lightsaber, slicing the hound's tail clean off just as she tumbled to the ground.
Like the first one, this vonskr flinched with a painful yelp, and then slunk away from the fight, leaving Mashir on the ground. She was dirty, roughed up, sore, and surprisingly winded. The Force had made everything seem so effortless before, granting unparalleled reflexes, precise control, and endless endurance. This fight with the vonskr though made her feel like a foolish, clumsy youngling once again.
Mashir staggered up from the dirt, greeted by a only somewhat amused Kai Hudorra.
"Not so easy, is it?" he said, his firm exterior mired by a glinting smirk.
"It shouldn't... be so hard." She managed between gasping breaths as she flung her torn outer robe away.
"Prepare yourself!" Kai shouted, "More are coming!"
The fierce melee that ensued between the two Jedi and the pack of vonskr hounds began. It lacked the dazzling displays of acrobatics or the magic of Force powers, but the fight was no less intense; more-so even, without the advantage of the Force. They couldn't bolster their stamina, or intuitively know the next moves of their opponents. As such, Kai and Mashir used only the simplest of maneuvers, and if anyone familiar with Jedi had seen it, they would initially see their technique as clumsy, sloppy, and unrefined.
The fight didn't last too long, and all of the vonskr had either fled or were struck down, littering the forest floor with their slain bodies. By the end of it, the two Bothan Jedi were left dirty, sweat-drenched, heaving breaths from exhaustion, in robes that had been torn or soiled in many places.
"Well done, young Padawan..." Kai congratulated as the last startled yowl of a fleeing vonskr faded away into the woods, his own voice drained and weary from the fight, "Even without the benefit of the Force, your abilities have proved sharp and well honed."
Mashir said nothing, so drained was she from the fight, as well as the shock of no contact with the Force. The unifying threads that united all living things, which normally formed a web from which she drew power, that she had lived with all her life before, was gone. Never before had the young Jedi felt so helpless, or so alone...
After a few seconds, she simply returned her lightsaber to its belt clip, and scooped up her tattered outer robe, stunned into an eerie silence.
"Are you alright?" Hudorra asked, as he approached his apprentice, and laid a hand on her shoulder. She shuddered at the touch.
"H– how is it that the Force is... absent in this place?" Mashir asked, her voice vacant, haunted, "What's causing it? Is it something of the Dark Side?"
"No, nothing so insidious. It is only the Yasalamiri." Kai answered, and pointed out an unassuming lizard like creature that clung to a nearby tree, "Other than their unique trait that shuts out the Force, there is little to fear from them."
"Its just these... lizard things?" Mashir uttered as she examined the creature closer, her words pinged with disbelief.
"Our contact is this way. I will explain on the way." Kai Hudorra beckoned his Padawan further through the forest, speaking as he did so.
"The vornskr hounds we just fought use the Force to hunt, to sense and pursue their prey. Over time, the yasalamiri evolved a way to shut out the Force as a defense mechanism against the vornskr's senses, rendering them invisible to anything and anyone that uses the Force to find them. Incidentally, this unique trait also nullifies other Force abilities used against them. This is why the Mandalorians, when they needed an edge over the Jedi during the Mandalorian wars, came here and collected them. There was even a major battle fought here during that conflict, mainly for control of these yasalamiri."
"I bet these yasalamir are the reason the Neti left." Mashir observed, "They can't survive without the Force."
"Indeed, many xenobiologists and historians would probably agree with you." Kai replied with a small hint of pride, and another hint of a tired sigh, "The order however, does its best to keep Myrkr in obscurity, lest the yasalimir of this world find their way into nefarious hands. I disagree with that aim though, because these remarkable yet otherwise dull creatures teach us all a valuable lesson, and forces us to ask a very important question."
"And what question is that, Master?" Mashir asked
Kai paused a moment, and turned to the young Bothan with as grave and serious an expression as she'd seen, "What are we without the Force?"
"But the Force defines us, binds us to all living things." Mashir answered the obvious question, motioning to the trees, vines, and all the forest around them.
"And yet, the flow of the Force can be stemmed, and dammed, cutting us off from that most fundamental of bonds." Kai pointed out a dead and rotting tree as they passed, "Far too many Jedi these days use the Force as a crutch, and allow other skills and talents to atrophy, or do not develop them at all. Never forget my Padawan, even though the Force is our constant companion, our most versatile tool, that tools do break, and even our most trusted companions will let us down sometimes."
"So what do we do?" Mashir asked.
"It is wise to have other means available: practical skills first and foremost, saving the Force for when it is absolutely necessary. Do not ever underestimate the value of merit outside the Force, and how then, the Force may compliment and enhance your knowledge and skills on top of them. You demonstrated this potential the day I chose you as my apprentice. In your duel against Wenton Baskalar, when disarmed, you used the force to deactivate his saber at the last second, and then disarm him in turn."
"It was a dirty tactic–"
"Yet it was clever, and well within the rules."
"But Baskalar still won that match."
"The only reason Baskalar won was because he lost control, unexpectedly, and had a brush with rage..." Kai pointed out with a shrug, "Not that I entirely disapprove though; I only disapprove that Wenton was clumsy with his emotions."
"Why is that?" Mashir wondered.
"Bear in mind that what I am about to tell you is not the doctrine taught by Yoda, or much of the Jedi."
"Care to explain, Master?"
"The rules and tenants of the Jedi, while well-meaning, inspire fear and hate, not just from those outside the order who are untrusting of Jedi, but also within ourselves." Kai explained, "Many in the Galaxy consider Jedi hypocrites, and rightly so. From our very first lessons, we are taught to fear the Dark Side, to avoid it whenever possible, and confront it whenever we can. Ironically, these teachings often instill within the Jedi the very same fear and hate that is claimed to start down the dark path: fear and hate of the Dark Side.
"It is my belief that we need our fears, but must not be made afraid by them. As one example, one need not be afraid to break a few rules once in a while." Master Hudorra gave an aside glance and a wink just then, "You see Mashir, very soon I am going to break one of the tenants of the Jedi order, one of those strict guidelines I do not fully support. Hopefully it will teach a thing or two in the process as well."
"And which tenant did you plan on breaking?"
"Ah, here we are!" Kai exclaimed, ignoring the question entirely,
The two Bothan Jedi emerged in a clearing in the forest, occupied by a camp that looked like it'd been there at least a few months. The camp was further occupied by people of questionable demeanor, most of them well armed and bearing a tired, gruff expression. All of them however were on alert, and some raised their weapons on the newcomers.
"Hold your fire, you lousy duds!" one of the men called out, and the others complied.
The figure who spoke approached the Jedi. He was human, Corellian by the look and sound of him, "You two look like you've been through hell, then dragged through the underbrush behind a speeder. Was that you that riled up those vonskr?"
"My apologies Jorj, it couldn't be helped." Kai replied with a small bow in the typical Jedi greeting.
The Correlian sighed and shook his head, "I swear, you Jedi types are the least subtle people I've ever had to work with."
"Mashir, this is Jorj Car'das: a smuggler." Master Hudorra motioned to the bearded man, then turned motioning to Mashir, "Jorj, this is my Padawan, Mashir Ivei'lya."
"I kind-of prefer the term 'Intrepid Businessman' over the crass 'Smuggler' myself." Car'das corrected, offering his hand to the young Bothan, who accepted, and gave it a polite shake.
Mashir felt something in Jorj's hand as she shook it, a palm-sized holocommunicator by the feel of it.
The Correlian gave a small smirk when he saw the realization cross the Bothan's face, "A handsome bit of credits went in to make this happen for you, Mashir."
"For me?"
When she drew her hand away holding the holocommunicator, it activated, and a flickering image soon came into focus.
"Mashir?" the image was another Bothan, middle aged, and somehow familiar... "By the shining rays of our glorious star Both, you've grown! And into such a beautiful young woman too!"
"Father?" she realized with a start.
"Yes Mashir, it's Karhka, your father!" Karhka Ivei'lya exclaimed with more joy than he knew how to convey, "You have no idea how long I've waited for this moment."
"How did you find me?!" Mashir asked, starting to well up with a whole slew of her own emotions, "The order restricts any communication with family."
"Smugglers, heh." Karhka answered with a proud chuckle, "They're the most resourceful scoundrels the Galaxy has to offer, able to get nearly anything from point Aurek to point Besh."
"But how can you keep this up? The Jedi can monitor the holonet transmissions–"
"Not likely, not the way we've sliced–" Car'das interrupted, then stopped himself, "I think I'll just give you folks some privacy."
"Yes, thank you Jorj." Karhka's projection gave the Correlian a nod, and Car'das walked away from the uneasy Jedi.
"Are you well, father?" Mashir asked once they were alone enough. She tried, but couldn't hide the wavering in her voice.
"Yes, incredibly well, especially now." Karhka answered with a beaming face, "Oh how I wish you could've been there at the last Combined Clans meeting here at home, when I told off that buffoon who had the gall to try and insult you, and how I stood up for you,"
"Oh?"
"They said their usual sniping bluster: 'You sent your only daughter away from her home, Karhka!' 'How could you betray your clan that way?' 'Do you not respect the Bothan way?' You know, the normal sort of clan-rivalry trash."
"Actually, I don't know..." Mashir pointed out, "but anyway, what did you say?"
"So I stood up there, and told the most boisterous dolt of the lot, 'At least my jewel Mashir is out protecting the Galaxy, making it a better place for us all, and not whoring herself away to every swinging swaggering Bishket on Bothawui like your daughter!'" Karhka had to stop a moment, letting out a bout of proud laughter, "You should have seen the look on his face; priceless!"
"Why are you doing all this, Father?" the Jedi asked suddenly,
"I don't want you to forget about us, Mashir." Karhka answered, becoming earnest, voice bent with a swirl of emotions all coming at him at once, "I don't want you to forget who you were, who you are, who you always will be. Even in your brief time with us, your mother and I loved you so very much then, we still do now, and always will."
"How is Mother?"
"She..." Karhka hesitated, torn between truth and hurt, "She's hanging on... "
"What's wrong?"
"I..." then nothing; just an awkward glance off to the side.
"Father please, tell me." Mashir insisted.
"I... I've tried many times since we gave you up to convince your mother we ought to have another child, but she's... petrified with fear, terrified the Jedi will take away our baby again. After all these years, she bears that shame and sorrow still. She hasn't been able to move on."
"Maybe... I could talk with her." Mashir suggested, curious, concerned, conflicted.
"I'm not sure that would help her, to be reminded of that shame once again, to see her child that she's not allowed to love."
"Does she know you're doing this?" the young Jedi asked, "Does Mother know you've been trying to contact me?"
"No..." Karhka said shaking his head, eyes downcast, "She knows nothing, it would bring her too much pain."
"Please, tell Mother about this, and tell her she needn't worry herself so much. I don't want her to be sad over me."
"If... if there comes a time when she is ready to know, I promise I will tell your mother anything you want her to know."
"Thank you." "Please do, Father."
"Blast it! The holonet encryption's deteriorating, some kind of interference..." Jorj Car'das cursed as he barged in, killing the moment, "Sorry folks, but you'll have to wrap this up quick."
"I love you Mashir, and so does your mother, so very much." Karhka said, hurried, with too much to say and too little time.
"I love you too." Mashir replied, trying to ignore the tears welling up in her eyes.
The projection in the palm of her hand began to flicker, and the words jumbled with static, "W... ill spea... ith each... again... time... omise!"
"Father!" the young Bothan Jedi called out, but was only met with the dead sound of white noise.
Only then, in the sudden silence, did Mashir notice that she was trembling, that her breath was coming in and out in stuttering sobs, that there was a pain through her chest as it a barbed icicle had been thrust in her. The silent holocommunicator fell out of her hand, and she staggered toward Master Hudorra, her legs threatening to collapse under her.
Mashir threw her arms around her Master, then couldn't hold on any longer, letting her tears flow from her eyes onto Kai's robes.
"Why did you do this to me?" she quietly demanded between sobs, "Tell me, please."
Master Hudorra was silent for a time, only able to hold his distraught Padawan in as warm an embrace as he could manage. When he did speak, his voice was quiet, and a little unsure of itself, "Your father would have persisted, and quite possibly have gotten into trouble with the order if I–"
"No! Don't treat me like a bumbling youngling! I don't need the Force to know that's not the real truth!" Mashir snapped back, her weeping eyes and sobbing voice suddenly sharp as daggers, "What exactly did you expect me to learn from this!?"
"Mashir I..." Kai stopped short, trying to find the best way to word his intentions, and word them in a way that wouldn't cause more upset. "I felt it best that you should experience these kinds of emotions, to know how it feels firsthand, and in a controlled manner. The fact that you had this experience here, without the Force, made it safe. Should a sudden surge of emotion overcome you, it would not be able to take hold through the Force, and then twist these unfamiliar feelings inside you like so many who are consumed by the Dark. I did this so when you feel these intense emotions again, you will be better prepared to handle them."
"It hurts, Master..." Mashir managed in a weak, feeble voice; a scared voice, "It hurts inside... more than any pain I've ever known."
"Then let it hurt, do not try to shut it out." Kai held the young Padawan closer, who then rested her weary head on his shoulder "We fear most what we do not know, Mashir. By knowing this pain, by becoming familiar with the agony inside... you will not be made afraid by it."
Kai almost didn't believe the words he spoke, but he knew them to be true, and he had to speak them nonetheless. Master Hudorra may have been obligated to be the steady pillar of support to his apprentice, but he could not help but feel some guilt claw at him. To have brought such pain upon Mashir, far more than anticipated, was a cruel thing, something most other Jedi would decry as too close to the Dark Side, and not without reason. Kai could only hope the Padawan had at least learned a few things from these experiences, he knew for sure that this experience had taught him a few things.
Thus, as the master teaches the apprentice, so too does the master learn in kind.
