A/N: Sooo… The depression from 2X05 pushed me to get my ass into gear and finish this bad boy. AND THEN, 2X07 is threatening to give me a heart-attack = MUST POST BEFORE IT PREMIERES *twitch 2AM posting*.

But ignore me and read and be merry, if only for a short time…

IMORTANT: The entirety of Trial of Five takes place by the information established in S1. While some information learned in S2 is used, the S2 plot and events are not relevant to this fanfiction. Chapter 5 takes place in the future beyond S2 anyway.


Disclaimer: I do not own Suits—*cries*—the boys and Donna belong to USA Network and Aaron Korsh.


DATE 5: END IN THE BEGINNING

"You can never go back."—Donna

Donna POV

August 10th, 2000.

I groaned as my back hit the bookcase. Files tumbled to the floor, but I did not care. The attack on my lips continued, effectively silencing any protest to the discord of the room. And I hungrily returned the assault, matching each kiss with a force I did not know I possessed.

My hands roamed his back beneath the jacket, tugging at the fabric of the shirt that should have been lost long ago. The bookcase gave me extra leverage as I pushed myself farther into him. Refusing to relinquish the advantage, I grabbed onto his tie and hastily returned my mouth to his.

He was having none of that, and roughly grabbed my waist, pulling me off the shelf. I gasped as he flipped us to the adjacent wall, trapping me against it until every inch of him was plastered against my skin. Heat seeped through me, reinforcing my lips against his as my hand found a grasp at the nape of his neck. Hands wrapped around my thighs and my squeal of surprise was muffled by the intrusion of his tongue as I felt my feet leave the ground.

My legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, locking me to him even more as he continued his assault on my tongue. He broke away suddenly and my protest quickly turned into a moan as his lips shifted their ministrations to my exposed neckline and roamed upward at an agonizingly slow pace. I panted for breath as every wire of my body was on end.

The feel of him had my eyes closing, head leaning back against the wall in unconcealed bliss. Lips roamed up the side of my neck, hitting the point behind my ear that triggered another moan of pleasure. Having enough, I deftly angled my mouth back to his and reestablish the battle. His responding groan melted into my limbs. Refusing to give in, my lips soon gained the upper hand. Teeth grazed against skin as I captured his bottom lip between them. I bit gently before releasing with a swift tug. His mouth instantly reconnected with mine and I responded gratefully.

Then everything stopped.

He pulled away so abruptly, I was forced to use the wall for support. My upper body leaned against it as we both breathed heavily. My hold on his waist remained blissfully undisturbed. His forehead came to rest against mine and our scents mingled as we caught our breath. Glazed eyes met mine and I watched them flash as he seemed to shake himself into recognition. Confusion reverberated through my senses, but I did not release my hold.

"Donna," my name resonated into the silence.

It was the first coherent sound to grace the room in minutes, and I eyed my partner grudgingly.

"Harvey," I mimicked impatiently, lightly tugging on the lapels of his jacket.

"We can't," he resisted weakly, subconsciously responding to my pull.

"I'm pretty sure we already are." Came the sarcastic retort, and I eyed our current position pointedly before pulling him even closer.

"And we have to stop." Harvey insisted quietly, but firmly as he grabbed my arms and stopped my attempt. Our lips lingered teasingly close before he pulled back slightly.

My questioning stare forced him to continue. The emotion in his eyes scared me, and the charged atmosphere instantly dissipated.

The words he uttered would never let me go.

"Because you can never go back," he admitted forcefully, locking our gazes. I barely registered the increased pressure on my arms, echoing the importance of the words.

"And I can't risk this right now." He continued, effectively preventing himself from backing down.

"You can't… I whispered, too stunned to finish the repeat.

"Not with you… Donna we can't."

Harvey was clearly struggling, but only one detail registered. And it was the only one that mattered.

Not with you.

The words stung and I recoiled into the wall. But no matter how hard I tried to resist them, they buried deep into my core with absolutely no chance of resurfacing.

Harvey instantly tightened his grip, successfully halting my instinct to bolt. He had to have known the effect of his words, but made no attempt to take them back. It was a desperate attempt to make me believe them. And it nearly worked.

I looked at him then, at the pain clearly etched in his face and that stubborn resistance of his that was trying so hard to clear it all away. I could see though, and I realized that the emotions raging through the man before me were never the ones I had intended. And were ones I never wanted to see again. Let alone be the cause of. I did not think I could stand it.

With a heavy heart, I gave him what he wanted.

"Ok." The word was barely a whisper and my body sagged in defeat.

Harvey did not move at the admission, body still lingering dangerously close to mine. The softening of his eyes was the only indication that he had heard me at all. A flash of regret crossed them before it dimmed into indifference. His hold finally fell away and I begged my legs to stand on their own.

Biting my lip, I willed myself to stop shaking as I straightened my skirt and blouse. The mask fell back into place and I returned to the only thing I knew, and the only routine that would save us both.

"The Anderson files will be on your desk in the morning," my voice ghosted across the file room, softly slicing the tense air.

I tried to look at him, to catch that one last glimpse of Harvey before he hardened back into the mask he had so carefully constructed. But he would not meet my gaze.

"Thank you Donna." He whispered in resolution before turning back to the case files strewn across the desk.

It was one of the only times he had ever said the words out loud, but the amount of true gratitude nearly smothered them.

I answered the silent request, and walked away. Closing the door with a heaviness that I was sure to drown in.

My body came back to reality, and I jumped at the echo of the residual door. Eyes snapping open to the glaring red numbers of my alarm clock in the late morning sun. 11:00 AM. My eyes glanced at the curtains, the ceiling, the adjoined bathroom door, and I gave a sigh of relief at the subtle normalcy of the bedroom. Dreaming… I was only dreaming. If it were only that easy…

I clenched my eyes shut in one last attempt to suppress the memories. That particular scene was buried so deeply in the past. I shivered at the lingering feel of his lips against mine, not able to stop the feelings from surfacing. Harvey had always had that effect.

It had taken me months to realize he was trying to protect me.

His decision that night had nothing to do with his duties to the DA or his ties to Jessica. He was never talking about risking his career, everything we had both been working so hard for… No, he was not willing to risk me. Our relationship, the dynamic we lived by, meant too much to him. And if he took that last step, there would be no turning back. His father had taught him that much, and the results of that lesson still haunted him.

Harvey had been afraid.

And I could never blame him for it.

I opened my eyes then, banishing the last of past emotions back into the corner of my mind. Thanking whatever god was responsible that it was no longer real.

The thanking quickly turned to loathing as the new state of consciousness brought to life an unearthly throbbing that penetrated my entire skull. I groaned at the sensation and squeezed my eyes shut again, blocking out what my brain now registered as horrid morning light. With the ethereal memories gone, the current reality hit me harder than I would have liked to admit. And with another glance at the alarm clock, the realization fell into place.

Tequila.

Vodka.

Everclear.

Correction: Shots…

And too many to count, not that I could recall them in my current state. It was safe to say Rachel and I had enjoyed ourselves—courtesy of a verbal self-esteem blow from my mother. The only clear memory was calling the firm to schedule the allotted time off before my favorite paralegal and I had drowned in our sorrows. At least I had been resourceful enough to schedule leave prior to the alcohol. The thought alone had me back to thanking the stars. My head pounded painfully in response. How did I even make it home last night?

My responding sigh echoed across the room as I silently cursed the absurdity. Hung-over on a Wednesday morning… at least I thought it was Wednesday. Another groan accompanied the thought. I could not remember the last time I had lacked the emotional stability to remain sober.

Well, suffice to say it explained the dreams. Alcohol had the irritating ability to induce unwelcomed trips down memory lane. Bringing to life suppressed memories that I tried to forget, but ones that my subconscious clung too in hopes that reminiscence would turn to reality.

A reality that I could never have.

"Good morning." The voice came from behind me and I let out a shriek I did not know I was holding.

"Whoa Donna! Easy!—

Despite the familiarity, instinct had me slinging the nearest item towards the intruder. I heard it slam against the far wall accompanied by what sounded like a muttered curse of surprise.

I sat up and quickly grabbed more ammo, turning toward the opposing company with my arm raised to fire…

And stopped.

Had it not been for the rough awakening, I would have thought I was still dreaming. My breath forced backed into slowness and I cursed the day I ever gave him the spare key.

Harvey's attention was still to his right, where the hard copy of Pride and Prejudice had slid down the wall and landed a mere foot beside him. The lawyer seemed shocked into stillness, though he must have felt me staring, for he looked up. His widened eyes fell to mine before shifting to the novel clutched in my right hand.

"Let's put Dickens down shall we?" He questioned softly with more hesitance than he wanted. It was obvious he was debating on whether or not it was safe to step closer to the bed.

I glanced quickly to Great Expectations in my hand before returning my attention to the closer. The rational side of me said to lower the weapon. The emotional side of me was about two seconds away from opening fire. What the hell was he doing here?

When I did not lower my arm, Harvey stole another look at the fallen book and then back to me. I could tell he was calculating my aim. If I was only a foot off blind, he would be stupid to think it would not improve with sight. Making a decision, his arms rose in a non-threatening gesture. His eyes, however, conveyed the exact opposite.

"Donna," he started firmly. "Put. The book. Down." He finished.

Though retaliation would have been far too easy, the look he was giving me conveyed too much to be ignored. Harvey was here for a reason. That thought alone allowed the novel to lower back onto the nightstand. I leaned against the headboard and grudgingly willed myself to relax as I eyed the man before me.

Harvey gave a near inaudible sigh of relief as he lowered his arms back to his sides, hands tucking away to his suit pocket.

"What are you doing here Harvey?" The bluntness of the question did nothing to hide the threat in my tone. Alcohol-induced headaches never made me a happy person.

"I came to check on you," the closer responded, slowly walking forward until he stood to my right at the side of the bed. "And by the looks of things, I'd say it was well warranted."

I could feel Harvey staring, but I refused to meet his gaze.

"I left a message at the firm," I countered. "It stated clearly that I t—

"Took the day off," Harvey finished for me.

"Donna," he continued, catching me with a knowing stare, "you never take the day off."

"There's a first for everything Harvey," I said lightly. My fingers rubbed against my temples, trying unsuccessfully to ease the dull ache in my skull.

"Rough night?" He chuckled softly.

"You have no idea," I groaned and dropped my hands back to my sides.

"I have to say I'm a bit disappointed you didn't ask me to join you," the closer countered playfully and I did not have to look to see the smirk.

"Shut up," I grumbled, taking the bait and throwing a pillow at him for good measure.

He dodged it of course.

"Clearly you had a good time," he mused and I felt the bed dip as he settled next to me.

"My head thinks differently," I growled at his apparent amusement.

"The dream you were having this morning suggested otherwise…" the closer trailed off and his eyebrows rose suggestively as he took in my appearance. His eyes flashed as they traveled downward.

Mortification was more than evident as Harvey returned to my stare. My eyes widened and my breath hitched—how long had he been here?

But something even more prudent nagged at my conscious and as Harvey's words caught up to my brain, my body froze in terror. And the sudden realization of what I was wearing came crashing into me. Or rather what I was not wearing… I was suddenly and irrevocably awake.

I tore my eyes away from the lawyer and looked down at the matching black lace bra and panty set that left little to nothing to the imagination. The heat of embarrassment began to seep into my already flushed skin. My gaze shot back to the closer.

"Harvey!" The accusation was more than clear as I crossed my arms to cover myself.

The man in question chuckled at my glare and hastily averted his eyes toward the ceiling in what I'm sure was some veiled attempt at peace-keeping.

"Donna," he grinned, eyes still trained on the ceiling. "You can't expect me to see something like that and not… react." Harvey glanced at me swiftly from his peripheral.

"Ugh!" I flopped back onto the bed and the groan quickly lost its emphasis as I pulled the comforter over my head. It was a sad attempt to block out the current company, but it was the only option at the moment. If sleep failed at keeping Harvey at bay, the fabric stood absolutely no chance.

I normally took no special consideration into what I wore to bed. Pajamas are meant to be comfortable and on most nights they consisted of shorts and an old T-shirt. Last night had apparently been an exception. I could only guess that I had been so exhausted, if not drop-dead drunk, that I simply unzipped my dress and fell gracelessly onto the bed in my underwear. It was normally a completely innocent offense. Unfortunately for me, my boss tended to make a habit of invading my personal space.

I felt the covers being pulled back to just reveal the tip of my nose as Harvey smirked down on me.

"As amusing as I find this," he started with lighted eyes, "I can count on one hand the amount of times I have witnessed you even slightly drunk, let alone hung-over." His gaze turned into what could only be described as accusing amusement as he finished. "What happened to make you of all people delve to the dark-side?" Harvey's question would have been mocking if it weren't for the blatant curiosity etched in his features.

I met his stare before pulling the covers back up and sighing in preparation.

"My mother called." The admission should have been flourished with sarcasm and much needed exasperation. Instead it fell flat, an ode to my current state of mind.

I could almost hear Harvey's eyebrows rising. Not waiting for him to counter, I plunged into the news that had set off the late-night extravaganza that I was currently paying dearly for.

"Natalie's getting married," I echoed blandly. Even if I felt like going into further detail, it was not needed. Harvey was no stranger to my family.

It was quiet a moment before the closer spoke.

"I'm guessing the guilt trip wasn't too far behind?" Though I could not see his face, Harvey's tone was enough. And I was glad I did not have to explain further. He already knew.

"I was a bit disappointed actually," I attempted to be flippant for both our benefits. "She did not even change strategy. Just the same, 'Donna you're nearly forty and not getting any younger. It should be you we are celebrating. Why can't you find a nice man and settle down?' blah blah…" I stopped the rant before the impersonation of my mother got away from me.

"And you wonder why I never come to Thanksgiving," Harvey muttered.

I heard him despite his intent and scoffed into the duvet. I pulled the covers back down and sat up beside him, the embarrassment at my appearance nearly forgotten.

"It's going to be at your condo this year," I smirked mischievously back at him. "God help me if I have to physically see my mother before the wedding." My body involuntarily shivered at the thought.

"Done." Harvey stated easily, and I raised my brow at his agreement.

"That easy?" The question laced with sarcasm.

Harvey shrugged. "If it saves me the trip to upstate New York to haul your drunken ass home, then yes." The closer grinned at my glare.

I let him have that one. Mother's seemingly needed influence and alcohol had never been a good mix.

My attention turned back to the alarm clock and the glaring letters flashed 11:40 AM. Despite the day off, my job was still drilled into habit.

"Harvey you should get going," I rounded back to the lawyer. "You have a lunch meet with Warren Daniels at noon."

The closer did not move though and I eyed him in question. Daniels was a hard man with an iron fist. An oil mongrel by trade, the man never liked to be kept waiting. I was honestly surprised he kept Harvey in his circle, and that the closer survived it.

"I had Mike move the meeting back an hour," the senior partner responded almost ignoring my insistence.

"You had Mike," I repeated dumbfounded, "move the meeting back? Harvey…

I trailed off in disbelief. My mind was reeling at the thought of the pup doing my job. I bristled at the insult.

"Relax Donna," Harvey smirked at my glare. "He can't even compare to you," his tone turned serious for a moment before turning back to amusement, "and I listened in on the call. He did fine."

Mike scheduling meetings… Harvey listening in on conversations… Me lying in bed with a hangover…

The world was ending. I swore it.

Harvey must have found my expression funny for he chuckled as he continued, "If it makes you feel any better, that was the first thing he did right all morning." The closer smiled as if remembering something particularly amusing. "You should have seen his face when I handed him your itinerary for the week."

"I'm not dead Harvey," I found myself retorting. "I'm hung-over. I'll be back a work tomorrow."

"Oh I know," Harvey grinned conspiratorially. "But Mike doesn't, now does he?"

I shook my head at his ridiculousness.

"You're evil," I countered, trying to hide my smile.

"And you're loving every minute of it." Harvey returned my smile before hopping off the bed and sauntering towards my closet.

"What are you doing?" I did not even bother to hide my curiosity as my eyes followed the lawyer in his pursuit.

"We are going out tonight." The statement was dimmed slightly from the distance within the closet and I could hear Harvey rummaging through my hangers.

"Oh and now you're being hilarious." I rolled my eyes at the absurdity of his suggestion.

"I prefer to think of it as charm," Harvey called through the door.

"And I prefer to think of it as a pain in the ass," I mumbled incoherently to the sheets as Harvey came back into view.

"I'm going to ignore that," he rose an eyebrow in mock seriousness, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed.

My returning expression was one he knew better than to ignore. He would not be Harvey though if he did not push. I was not disappointed.

"Ray will be here at seven with a new dress," he said it so nonchalantly that I could not tell if he was bluffing. I honestly do not know if I cared.

"Harvey," I warned.

My dresses were fine, not to mention most of them were technically his. Someone had to put the corporate card to use. The insult to my wardrobe took a backseat to the fact that Harvey wanted to be social of all things. He had to be up to something…

The man in question sighed at my obvious distain and returned to stand at the end of the bed.

"Then what exactly," he paused for emphasis before pulling out two thin pieces of paper from his jacket pocket, "am I supposed to do with these."

He held them right in front of my nose and the detail had my jaw dropping before I could stop it.

Tickets.

The pieces of paper were tickets. And not just any tickets. Two tickets to The Royal Shakespeare Company's presentation of Hamlet at 8:00PM tonight. The Shakespeare classic had been sold out for nearly half a year. The London-based company rarely came to New York, but when it did it was always spectacular. Landing open tickets was a near impossible task. And one that I doubted even Harvey Specter was capable of.

"How?" I questioned, narrowing my eyes at the lawyer.

"I have my ways," Harvey smirked as he tucked the tickets back into his suit pocket.

"You conned them off of Louis didn't you?"

The smirk turned to a grin and I collapsed face-first into my pillow.

The man could be beyond exasperating. Harvey had a nasty habit of getting into betting feuds with the junior partner. Normally it was harmless, resulting with one partner sulking for a day and the other flaunting his prize victoriously. Lately though, it had gotten brutal. And I did not want to think of what else Louis had lost to this particular circumstance. I lifted my head back up and turned towards the foot of the bed in half-hearted annoyance.

"That's cruel Harvey," I continued.

"And yet extremely entertaining," the closer mused, moving to lounge next to me again.

The smile never left his face and I could tell he was far happier about this than he should have been. Neglecting to care about wrinkling his suit was the first indicator.

"Louis has been bragging about these tickets for weeks." I let the statement fall between us, slightly accusing, yet trying vainly to take the conversation seriously.

"And now we can go," he met my gaze and I tried to find the punch line.

"We?" The incredulousness of my tone was borderline insulting, but I simply could not wrap my head around it.

There was a reason Jessica graced Harvey with Yankees tickets and Louis with Broadway. They were so glaringly opposite of one another that the lines never crossed. I began to wonder if I were still dreaming.

Harvey ignored the question entirely. Instead the closer rose back to a sitting position and regarded me closely.

"Consider it a consolation for your shitty night."

"Harvey you hate these things," I reminded dryly.

"I've gone before." The lawyer's petulance did nothing for his case.

I merely raised my eyebrow in response.

Yes, Harvey had gone to plenty of plays, but it was never on his own accord. It was always to schmooze clients or close a deal. If not for his duty to the firm, he would avoid them at all costs. There was a one-time exception, but that was ten years ago and did nothing to aid his current track record.

"I promise to stay awake this time," the closer amended, smiling innocently at my warranted disbelief.

I raised the other brow and waited.

"Donna it was one time," Harvey scoffed. The smile was lost as he glared at the memory.

"Harvey," I pried.

The partner sighed in defeat and met my gaze. There was a seriousness in his expression that was almost hesitant in its severity. The sudden change in atmosphere halted my thoughts and I held my breath as he spoke.

"You deserve a nice night Donna." It was not much, but the sincerity and simplicity of the sentence spoke volumes. And it was more of an admission than I could ever hope from the senior partner.

I rarely got to see this side of Harvey, but each time I did it reminded me of what could have been and what we had become. I let out the breath I was holding.

"You're serious aren't you?" I asked quietly, considering his honesty and trying not to read too far into it. "You really want to do this?" I finished.

"Yes," the closer stated surely.

The hesitation lasted mere seconds.

"Alright," I agreed.

Harvey smiled then, and I could not help but offer one in return.

It was fleeting though, broken by the distinct sound of footsteps on the floorboards. As they echoed closer, my eyes shot to the open door and then back to Harvey in panic. We barely had time to face the door before an all too familiar idiot barged through it.

"Harvey! Dude we have to—

Mike broke off abruptly, stopping mid-stride in the doorway. One look at his widening eyes and dropped jaw and I was instantly thrown back to my state of dress. The blush crept across his cheeks and my irritation escalated as the pup's eyes lingered on my exposed figure.

"Mike!" I hissed none too pleasantly at the associate. My glare seared daggers into his skull.

I could not get the covers up fast enough.

Harvey instantly stood from the bed, shielding me with his body and forcing Mike's stare onto him. One look in Harvey's direction was all it took for the kid to turn on the spot and throw his gaze toward the wall. But the damage was done. I swore to never get drunk again.

"What the hell are you doing?" Harvey growled. "What part of wait in the car was too complicated for you to understand?" The closer bit out. It was obvious that he wanted nothing more than to strangle the puppy, but he stayed put.

I used his restraint as an opportunity to rummage through my nightstand drawer for something to cover my current distractions. Grasping the first T-shirt my hands found, I yanked the black fabric over my head. Satisfied with length of the shirt and thanking the stars for the opaque color, I managed to haul myself off the bed and stand next to Harvey. The closer eyed me for a moment before returning death to his associate. Mike did not turn around, but had clearly gotten over the closer's earlier threat.

"Harvey we're late," Mike reasoned with more snark than I had patience for. The irony of the statement was not lost on me and I could almost see him rolling his eyes. "If you wanted a late-morning booty-call, all you had to do was say so. I could h—

WHACK!

Great Expectations slithered to the ground after hitting its target with as much force as my arm could muster. The contact cracked in the air, leaving the pup grabbing the back of his head in obvious pain.

"Ow! Son of a—

"Michael James Ross," my growl stopped the associate's oath, his back going rigid and his body freezing mid-hunch. "So help me God, if you utter another word, I will cut out your tongue and have you feed it to the pigeons on my window sill. And then you can help me shove a hot poker down your throat to sear off the remains of that clearly misguided muscle."

Mike's mouth clamped shut. Even Harvey had the intelligence to look scared.

Both boys remained still and I relished the silence before the pounding in my skull reminded me of my diminishing patience.

"Out." I hissed finally, clenching my eyes shut against the headache.

Mike did not have to be told twice, bolting out the bedroom door. I listened for the slamming of the front door and opened my eyes to see Harvey regarding me with an unspoken question.

"Out." I repeated, shoving the closer towards the door.

He resisted slightly and turned toward me.

"What did I do?"

"You left the front door open genius," I ground out in annoyance. "Not to mention your current creeper status has well surpassed the limit."

"I prefer caring friend," the lawyer hedged, obviously offended by my retort.

"Daniels," I forced out, hoping the reminder would get him moving. "Now," I continued with one last shove to the door.

Harvey finally took the hint, but lingered in the door.

"Seven," he spoke firmly in his own reminder and eyed me knowingly, hand on the door.

"Seven." I repeated, shooing him with my hand and not even attempting to hide the irritation.

Harvey smirked in amusement and success before pulling the door closed.

I sighed in final relief and flopped back onto my bed. Those two were going to be the death of me.

...~**~...


True to his word, Ray arrived at exactly 7:00 PM. The knock on the door revealed the driver as he held out a garment bag rather sheepishly. Deciding to relieve him of his clear discomfort, I gave a quick thank you and took the offered bag. Ray nearly sighed in relief and returned to his professional ideals, informing me that the car was waiting outside before retreating back down the hall. Shutting the door, I eyed the black bag warily. The indecision was brief and I swiftly made my way to the bedroom.

The fabric slid easily over my form and rested comfortably against my back. I was too curious not to turn towards the closet mirror. And I could not stop the awed smile as I did.

It was immaculate. Stunningly simple in its elegance.

The dress fell to my knees, its moderate length giving way to a sweetheart neckline with a molded cap sleeve. The paired details came together with a crisscrossed setting that cinched at the waist and leveled to a straight skirt. The combination alluded to a figure to die for without revealing a thing. The modern spin on the classic cut clung to all the right places, yet remained tasteful to the eye. A subtle glint lingered in the charcoal fabric, coming to life in the right angle of light. The resulting shine gave the design just enough edge to garner attention. Classic and powerful. It screamed Harvey Specter. And I fell in love instantly.

"Perfect."

I nearly jumped out of my skin. The interruption wiped the dazed smile off my face and I rounded on the intrusion.

"Knocking… Doorbell?" I repeated sarcastically, not bothering to hide the sheer exasperation as I glared accusingly at the closer.

"Where's the challenge in that?" Harvey retorted lightly from the closet doorway. "Besides, knocking lacks mystique." The lawyer continued as he moved from the door to stand closer.

"Mystique?" I mocked in disbelief, eyeing his impeccable appearance. "That's what you're going with?"

"It's a perfectly respectable quality," the senior partner defended before returning his attention to the dress.

His concentration had me turning back to my reflection in the mirror and I matched his regard quietly.

"It's beautiful Harvey."

"Yes. It is." The responding implication hung heavy in the air and my gaze shifted to the man in the mirror.

Harvey's attention was elsewhere though and I shivered as hands ghosted down my back. As the closer pulled the zipper up, the realization of tonight took its place at the forefront of my mind. I could not pull my eyes from Harvey's form in the mirror. And as the zipper reached its end, the closer looked away from the task and directly into my mirrored stare. His eyes confirmed every thought.

We were actually going to do this. We were doing this.

And for at least tonight, we both wanted this.

Consequences be damned.

A shift in the air broke me from my reverie. Focus returned to find myself alone in the mirror once more. Peering out from the closet, I looked to find the closer near the bedroom door. His eyes followed my movement, smirk answering my wondered gaze. How did he do that? Focusing back to the closet, I slid on a pair of pumps and grabbed my clutch before walking back into the bedroom.

"Ready?" Harvey questioned lightly, effectively transitioning the moment back to the original intent of the evening. The lawyer's brow rose slightly in challenge as he held out his arm.

I eyed him for a moment before remembering exactly what the next few hours would entail. And suddenly I did not care. The previous minutes were instantly pushed aside at another thought: Hamlet was waiting… The Royal Shakespeare Company's Hamlet.

Shades of gray aside, the closer was offering an amazing evening, and it would be blasphemous not to take him up on it. The anticipation was enough to morph my questioning emotions into an internal squeal of glee, and I forced myself into practiced restraint as I made my way to the man at the bedroom door.

"Absolutely." I smiled, the enthusiasm causing my arm to wrap around his a little too tightly.

Harvey shook his head, his only response a chuckle as he led us out.

...~**~...


"I still don't understand the tights," Harvey mused, unlocking the condo door and pushing it aside.

"It's tradition Harvey," I rolled my eyes at the closer and stepped past him into the flat. "And besides, wardrobe is the last thing on your mind when mastering a classic like Hamlet."

The play had been fantastic… beyond that really. Yet while I had done nothing but admire the profound talent of Shakespeare, Harvey had focused on his particular displeasure of the male costumes.

"It can't be comfortable," the closer called as he made his way to what I knew to be the master bedroom.

Harvey may look damn good in a tux, but it was a little known fact that he could never stay in them for long. Sure enough, I heard clothes hit the floor and drawers opening before I even made it to the spare bedroom. The talk of tights and comfort had me itching to get out of the exquisite dress and heels, and I habitually followed the closer's suit.

Finally making it to the familiar room, I shed the dress quickly. Kicking off the heels in the process, I crossed the large expanse of the quarters and found what I wanted easily. The fourth drawer of the armoire was established as mine long before the end of Harvey's first year in the condo, and it was never touched save for my own devices. Technically Harvey had admitted the entire room to me, but that particular drawer had always held a special place. The room was a mere consolation prize in comparison.

The contents of the drawer never changed, and my drifting fingers found the memorized pieces quickly. I threw the battered T-shirt over my head and stepped into the mesh shorts. A soft sigh of comfort instinctively released as the fabrics touched my skin. The dress was exceptional, but I would never get tired of this.

Settled, I made my way back up the hall towards the kitchen and adjoined living space. I heard the refrigerator shut and turned the corner just as Harvey sat on the couch. Remote already in hand and two beers on the coffee table. Someone was prepared.

I leaned on the wall and watched as Harvey turned the TV on and lounged against the arm of the couch. The lawyer was more content in his own pair of shorts and T-shirt than he had ever been in that tux. The current look had always been my preference. I could not stop the smile at the stark contrast.

"You know if you're going to stalk me from the corner, you could at least do it in your underwear."

The comment had me straightening from the wall and matching the glinting eyes of the closer with an eye-roll of my own.

"Aw, the skin-tight leggings didn't fulfill your viewing pleasure for the night?" I mocked back quickly, earning myself a glare from the lawyer.

"And it's your shirt," I added playfully. "That has to count for something."

"Not nearly enough to erase the horrors of London," the closer grumbled.

I smiled at the antics and walked to the back edge of the couch. Leaning over, I wrapped my arms lightly around his shoulders.

"Thank you Harvey," I whispered in his ear, followed quickly by a kiss on the cheek to further my gratitude.

My smile grew as I felt the barest hint of a shiver work its way down his spine.

"Anytime," was the soft response as he turned his head slightly to meet my eyes.

The banter subsided and I held his gaze, hoping he could see how truly thankful I was for tonight.

In all our years together, it was nights like these that brought to light how dear this man was to me, and how invaluable I was to him. From losing his first case to his brother's illness, I had stood by in understanding silence. Waiting until he needed me, and sometimes acting even before. And he had done the same for me. Whether it was my failing dating life or my grandmother's death, he had been there. The diligent parallels never wavered, and never could.

We were all each other had after all.

I blinked myself out of the memory to find Harvey's eyes still watching me. No questions lingered in the brown depths, just understanding. It was all I needed.

My arms stayed around the closer, but my eyes moved to the light emanating from the television, effectively breaking the moment of recollection.

"You DVR'd the Yankees' game?" I dead-panned, loosening my grip on his shoulders.

"Had to have some insurance in case you agreed to Shakespeare," the lawyer smirked at my ill-attempted glare and held out a beer in pacification.

"In other words," I mocked lightly as I grabbed the beer, rounding the couch to sit beside him, "you needed a way to reclaim your man-card." I finished with a knowing stare his way before returning my attention to the game.

"Donna the play was four hours long," Harvey countered, easily returning the banter. "And I am not going to bed with thoughts of ghosts, nunneries, and Oedipus in my head. Next thing I know, I'll wake up impersonating Louis." The closer finished with a grunt of dissatisfaction and focused back to the TV.

My smile grew wide as the meaning of his rant registered in my brain.

"I knew you were paying attention," I stated smugly as I eyed the lawyer out of the corner of my vision.

Harvey just rolled his eyes.

I chuckled at the expression, but decided to let him off easy. Staying awake for the entirety of Hamlet had earned the senior partner some brownie points.

"It's a good thing I like baseball," I mused lightly, tucking myself into Harvey's left side as Chavez stepped up to bat.

"I knew there was a reason I kept you around," Harvey whispered and I felt his arm wrap around me in response.

By the bottom of the seventh, my eyes had drifted shut. The feeling of content I had so recently longed for washed over me, lulling me to sleep with Harvey's gentle breathing and the echo of ESPN.

...~**~...


The morning greeted me much more kindly than the day prior. It was the soft pressure of my internal alarm pushing me into consciousness this time. A far more tempting interruption compared to the impromptu hangover and throbbing headache. Still, I was reluctant to move. I was too damn comfortable to even put forth the effort.

The soft rhythm of Harvey's breathing echoed against me, the TV silent. Harvey and I remained sprawled on the couch. And though somewhere during the night our limbs had tangled together more securely, my weight still rested on his chest, head tucked right beneath his chin. The familiar pressure of his arm on my back rounded to a secure hold on my side. Giving into the comfort, I tucked myself further into the hold and drifted…

When the alarm sounded the second time, I knew there was no way to ignore it. As comfortable as I was, I was nowhere near lazy enough to spend the entire morning on the couch. Fourteen years with the man beneath me had squandered any hope of that habit emerging.

My eyes cracked open to find the soft morning light accenting the condo. By the light's intensity, it had to be somewhere around 8:00AM. And if that were true, the unthinkable had happened.

Both Harvey and I were late for work.

The newfound truth gave me the ounce of motivation I needed to untangle myself from my sleeping companion. As carefully as I could, I lifted my weight off of Harvey. Slipping out from underneath his arm and lithely rotating my legs until my feet touched the floor. Extraction complete, I rose slowly and quietly, content in watching my friend sleep. It was a rare scene.

Harvey was usually a light sleeper, always waking at the softest noise or action. But this morning was different. Clearly he had needed the hours of unconscious peace. And luckily it seemed last night was gracious enough to grant us both a deep and dreamless night. A soft smile stretched across my lips at the image of Harvey curled into the cushions.

The firm could wait a little longer.

I turned away before I delved deeper, and honed my sights on the coffee maker resting on the kitchen counter. I tiptoed over to the countertop and quickly gathered the needed supplies from the adjoining cabinets. Once the coffee was set and brewing, I wandered out onto the private terrace.

The fresh air was a vital indulgence as I made my way over to the side railing. The New York streets were rampant as usual this time of morning, and the noise was oddly comforting to my waking mind. I rested against the railing as the last bits of sleep were pushed aside. The fog gave way and I was finally able to think.

Last night…

Last night had been amazing.

The atmosphere, the play… Harvey.

It had all fallen together with such ease reminiscent of long practiced habit. Harvey and I had always been drawn together. The instinct had never been ignored, but molded into the intricate dynamic we lived by. Over the years it had formed into a formidable asset, both to our profession and to our friendship. But last night was different.

The established lines had blurred, and neither of us attempted to refocus them. In the past thirteen hours, the lines had been skirted countless times. And while the lines were never crossed, the possibilities were consuming. The teasing, the implications, the freedom… It had worked so well. I could not help but feel that this was the way it should have been, all those years ago.

The thought gave way to the harsh reality, and the memories of the prior evening flitted away in an instant. I had been so comfortable and so happy that I had foolishly let myself forget.

It could never be.

The significance of that day in the file room hit harder than ever. The decision had been made then, and I could not change it now. Harvey had been right. I had to let it go… before we lost everything.

I gripped the railing until my knuckles bled white. Whatever I thought last night had been, it was resolved to nothing but a memory now. I locked it in the far recesses of my mind along with all the other moments that were too tempting to latch on to. Why did I keep doing this to myself? I knew better. One night with Harvey seemed to crumble every wall I had built. And it left me falling into the painful pattern of wishing and wanting. It was a dangerous mindset with far-reaching consequences. If I drifted too far, I would succumb to them.

"I thought you left."

Harvey did not surprise me this time. Spending the night with him had me more attuned than usual. My thoughts turned off immediately, and I softened my grip on the rail. The mask fell into place naturally as I turned my smirk towards his approaching figure.

"If it were that easy, I would have done it years ago," I played. The sarcasm shone in my eyes and stayed on Harvey as he came to rest beside me at the rail.

"Says the woman in the clearly borrowed sleepwear," he countered suggestively with a pointed look at the Harvard T-shirt draped across my figure.

"What other choice did I have?" I hedged.

"The bra and underwear worked well yesterday," the lawyer offered too innocently. The smirk gave him away.

"You're incorrigible."

"I'm a man."

"Who went to a Shakespeare play last night," I finished dryly. The victorious smile stretched across my face at Harvey's obvious distaste for the comment.

"Sue me," the closer retorted, unable to hide his disgruntled nature.

"Which reminds me," I hummed to the air, "I need to call Jessica and have her push your 10:00AM meeting back to noon."

Harvey just rolled his eyes.

"That woman is going to kill us when we get in," I grumbled to no one in particular as I turned from the railing. My cell phone was still in my clutch…

"No need," Harvey's comment stopped my movement. "I called Mike. We're taking the day off."

I instinctively scoffed at the ridiculousness, but one look at Harvey's face halted the mirth. He was serious.

"Who are you and what have you done with Harvey Specter?" The serious tone barely masked the question's disbelief.

I was used to Harvey Specter. My entire life nearly revolved around the lawyer. But this… this was different. This was Harvey. Yesterday had been the first glimpse of him in thirteen years. And the longer the mask stayed down, the harder last night was to forget.

"Donna, it's one day," the closer reasoned, clearly unperturbed with the proposition.

It was time for a reality check.

"You seem to forget the implications of both of us not showing up for work," I reminded coolly. Leaning back on the railing and fixing the lawyer with a knowing look.

He knew better.

The rules of our professional schedules had become second nature. I always arrived before him, he always stayed after me. We never arrived together, we were never late together, and we certainly did not leave together. The routine kept the rumors in check. Needless to say taking an adjoined day off without the cover of vacation spoke volumes, screamed them really.

"And both of us coming in uncharacteristically late is a better option?" He countered easily.

"Fine," I offered. "You can stay. I'll go."

If I arrived late, which I undoubtedly would today, it would be pointless for Harvey to come into the firm at all. Harvey shedding his workaholic ways for a day was almost believable. And it was far better than the alternative: If I came in late, and he arrived after… well, I did not want to think about what that would imply.

"If I'm not there," the closer hedged in return, ignoring my silent process, "you have nothing to do. And if you have nothing to do, there is no need to show up." Harvey finished.

It was clear the lawyer thought his reasoning superior, but there was one more hitch in his brilliant plan.

"Harvey," my tone caught his attention. "What will Louis think?"

It was the one piece of blackmail that I was not willing to give. No matter what Harvey chose to believe, the other partner knew the closer had the tickets. And even Louis was smart enough to figure that Harvey and I skipping a day meant we had gone to Hamlet together. Hell, me not being at my desk this morning was probably more than enough to set the junior partner into rat-mode. And the last thing I needed was an overly eager Louis snooping around the office.

"Let him think."

I would have laughed had the man beside me not been completely serious. And it took me a moment to comprehend that he really was.

The statement hung uneasily in the air, but its meaning was clear. Harvey was not playing games anymore. Steeling myself, I returned my gaze to my grip on the railing. Despite last night, I had to cling to the remaining balance now. The time for skirting lines was over, and one of us had to realize that.

"This isn't about the day off is it?" I whispered quietly, easing the conversation into uncharted ground.

"It can be if you want it to," Harvey offered cautiously. "Or…," he continued. "We can get down to what's really on your mind this morning." The closer's brow rose in expectation, imploring me to choose. "I'm sure the railing would prefer the latter," he finished smoothly, eyes shifting pointedly to my grip before returning to my profile.

The responding sigh that fell from my lips was a sad attempt at resistance. Letting my hands fall from the steel trim, I let my body lean against the glass instead. The silence echoed with a sudden hesitance that I had no control over.

"Donna—

"Harvey what are we doing?" The abrupt question cut off the closer's pry, and I honed my glare as his eyes locked onto mine.

"Something we should have done years ago," Harvey matched my tone. The closer seemed to be ready for my anger, even if I wasn't.

An hour ago, the admission would have been a relief, but all it did now was harden my resolve to return to the life I had been living the past fourteen years.

"It's not that easy," I countered, turning my head back to the city.

"And why shouldn't it be? We paid our dues Donna," Harvey reasoned. The lawyer moved closer until he was right next to me. Our shoulders touched as he leaned down to recapture my attention. I tried vainly to ignore him.

"And we'll keep paying them Harvey. It's how it works… how it's always worked," stubborn resolution hindered my tone. I tried to bring him back to my well-constructed reality, but I honestly did not know how much longer I could hold onto it. Harvey was giving into everything I had hoped, and it was nearly impossible to ignore.

"We can't risk it," I continued. "You said it yourself."

"That was a long time ago," Harvey hedged, trying to gain ground.

"It doesn't change anything. You made your decision, and I respected it. Hell it eventually made sense!" I ground my teeth to keep my voice from rising higher. "But don't you dare ask me to give in now. Not when I've finally started to accept that it would never happen. You can't ask that of me Harvey—

"I can. And I am." The lawyer's resolution cut off my accusation and he moved until he was in front of me. Arms stretched to either side of me and braced against the railing, I was locked in. He was inches away as he continued, "I wasn't willing to risk it then, but the cards are different now. And they're pointing to what we both wan—

"We shouldn't want it!"

The words came before I could stop them, and the silence that followed was deafening.

My body sagged slightly against the glass, and I closed my eyes, refusing to look at the closer. Harvey had pushed my simmering emotions to the brink, and I had finally let go of the suppressed feelings. My heart pounded in my ears, adding to the unnerving silence. I could feel Harvey's breath against my face, and my next words were barely whispered.

"When this goes wrong, we lose everything," I steeled. "Every goal achieved, every aspect of our relationship goes out the window," my eyes reopened to find the closer's waiting gaze. "I can't risk that, not even for you."

The sickening sense of déjà vu resonated through my system. Yet Harvey was having none of it.

"Bullshit," the closer bit out, eyes flashing dangerously. "I watched you walk away once… I'm not doing it again."

"Harvey…

"Tell me you don't want this," the closer demanded, grabbing my face between his hands. "Tell me you don't want it and I'll stop."

His eyes searched mine, and there was nothing I could do to banish every memory that came flooding through the gate the instant he touched me. And they all said the same thing.

I did want it. And I wanted it badly.

That was all Harvey needed.

And the lines fell.

His lips descended onto mine. And my crumbling resolve diminished with the soft pressure of his mouth. The kiss was a sheer contradiction of every kiss prior. The walls did not rattle, the glass did not break, and there were no disheveled files in sight. Yet it was everything I wanted it to be and more. A new confidence toppled my ragged emotions and my lips returned the force willingly. One kiss encompassed fourteen years of emotion. And we were finally allowed to let go.

The thought had me smiling as the kiss broke. Harvey's expression mirrored my own, and the closer leaned in for one more short kiss before pulling back and resting his forehead on mine. My hands grazed down Harvey's forearms until I reached his fingertips. Our hands linked instinctively and I relished the comforting grip. We stayed like that. Finally content to just be.

You can never go back. And this time, we didn't want to.

...

...

...

...~**~...END...~**~...


A/N: Three cheers for defiling the DA's file room lol ;)

Many apologies for the ridiculously long wait on this last chapter… I thought I had it… then S2 came in and broke me into little pieces.

Never Let Me Go—Florence + The Machine = AWESOME chapter motivation… Just sayin'.

Now I'm going to go mope in the corner and think up some Oneshots to get revenge on Aaron Korsh for Break Point *glares*. No one destroys the Harvey/Donna dynamic and gets away with it… no one.

*****THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU*****

THANK YOU so incredibly much for your reviews of TOF [and Adoration for that matter].

TOF was my first attempt at Suits FF, and while I go back and read some of the earlier chapters and cringe, I am glad the readers have been enjoying it. I know I have been horrible with the update of this last chapter, but the fact that you guys stuck with me and even continued to review BLOWS MY MIND.

A special thanks to Priestess of Groove, your critiques and encouragement is always appreciated and I hope this update helps counter the balance of the H/D universe that you have been carrying on your shoulders for the past months lol.

I love you all and you have been amazingly wonderful :D I hope you enjoyed and look forward to writing more fics for you, and continuing to add to our Suits community.

And as always: Thanks for reading! -HV

Don't forget Mr. Blue :) -