PART THREE: Dragon of the North
By noon the next day, Alayne stood down the path from Sky Haven Temple. She could hear Delphine practicing drills in the courtyard and felt slightly ill, like a pupil being sent to the headmaster's office.
Delphine and Esbern were right. But so was Paarthurnax. She gritted her teeth and walked into the courtyard, habit helping her fake confidence she most certainly did not feel.
Esbern was sitting on a bench a few paces away from Delphine, nose deep in a book as usual. He looked up with a smile as Alayne approached.
"Ah, Dragonborn," he said, getting to his feet. "Is it done?"
Alayne forced herself to meet the old man's eyes. "It's more complicated than I initially anticipated," she began, but Delphine cut in without even breaking her rhythm against the training dummy.
"We have nothing to talk about until Paarthurnax is dead," she said, her sword point slashing across the dummy's painted heart. Alayne winced and looked instinctively to Esbern.
"I thought you could handle the Greybeards. Or at least avoid them," he said slowly.
"It's not that, it's-"
"It's that you didn't have the stomach to do the right thing."
Delphine finally turned from the training dummy, though her sword remained unsheathed. Her lips were thin with anger. "Well?" she demanded. "Isn't that it? You came all this way just to tell Esbern and I you lost your nerve?"
"Delphine, we should hear her out. There are any number of things that could have-"
"No."
Both Blades turned to Alayne. "No, I didn't lose my nerve," said the young Breton, her voice growing stronger with each word. "But I'm not going to so much as take a scale off Paarthurnax's tail, and you're going to hear me out."
Delphine's eyes narrowed dangerously. "There's nothing to hear. You're the Dragonborn. You need to do this."
"I'm trying to explain," said Alayne with a twinge of exasperation. "Paarthurnax is different from the other dragons. He wants to be good. And he is."
"A few good deeds don't make up for centuries of evil," said Esbern. "At some point, there must be a reckoning."
"There already has been. He's lived on that mountain for ages with his guilt, spent every moment of every day atoning for it. Doesn't everyone deserve a second chance?"
"Some people don't," said Delphine bitterly. She thrust her sword through the dummy's neck. "Those who destroy without thought, who seek to impose their will on others. Those who have no mercy deserve no mercy."
Silence followed her outburst, and looking at the other woman's battle scars and worn features, Alayne saw something other than anger. "Is this about Paarthurnax, or about the Thalmor?" she asked quietly.
It was evidently the wrong thing to say. Delphine's eyes flashed, and she strode up to Alayne until they were almost nose-to-nose, brushing off Esbern's restraining hand on her shoulder.
"I am a Blade, one of the last, and I have not spent the last two and a half decades on the run just to be lectured by the likes of-"
"The likes of what, exactly?" said Alayne, her own temper starting to rise. "The likes of a sheltered little Breton girl? Or perhaps the Arch-Mage of Winterhold's College? The master of the Thieves' Guild? The destroyer of the Dark Brotherhood?"
"You think I care? You are Dragonborn! Your purpose is to slay dragons, and if you can't even fulfill that, I cannot serve you as a Blade."
To Alayne, it merely felt like a swell of white-hot fury bubbling up uncontrollably within her. But to Esbern and Delphine, it seemed as though she suddenly towered over them, eyes flashing with unearthly fire, power radiating from her in unrelenting waves.
"Yes, I am Dragonborn," she whispered. "I am the blood of Akatosh. I am Ysmir, the Dragon of the North, heir to the legacy of Talos himself!"
As she spoke, her voice grew until thunder crashed through the mountains, shaking the very stones of the temple. She turned her gaze to Delphine, then Esbern, who stood rooted to the spot.
"You are sworn to serve and protect me.You dare break your oath? You dare sever the bonds that have existed since the first Akiviri knelt before the first Dragonborn Emperor? If you are truly so blind in your arrogance, you no longer deserve to be called Blades."
And then as suddenly as it had come, the thunder receded, leaving a pretty young Breton with round green eyes blinking at the two shell-shocked Blades. The fury she'd felt so acutely subsided, but she could still feel an odd sort of tingling in her fingertips.
Esbern was the first to regain his composure. Wordlessly, he dropped the book he'd been holding and knelt in the snow before her. Delphine followed suit a few seconds later, still looking like she'd seen a ghost.
"You're right, Dragonborn," said Esbern gravely. "And as the first Blades swore their swords and lives to Tiber Septim and his heirs, so too do we to you."
Alayne hastily pulled them to their feet. "I, um, accept your oaths," she said, hoping that was more or less right. "Sorry for yelling. No harm done, ok?"
Delphine and Esbern exchanged a long, unfathomable look. "No harm done," said Delphine, looking faintly relieved.
"Good," said Alayne, managing a small but genuine smile. "I have to hit the road again. I just thought you deserved to know the truth."
Esbern didn't say a word until the Dragonborn and her mount were silhouettes against the mountainside. He looked askance at Delphine, who merely shook her head.
"That was...something," she said.
"Something indeed," said Esbern with the hint of a chuckle. Delphine sighed, but she allowed Esbern to steer her back into the temple. She retrieved her weapon from the dummy as she passed, sheathing it once more. Now, it seemed, was not the time for swords.
But soon, her blade would taste dragon blood, and for better or worse, it would do so under the command of the Dragonborn.
Alayne waited a while before returning to High Hrothgar. She had guild business in Markarth, and then there was that giant that Jarl Elisif wanted her to handle. All in all, it was two weeks before she once again opened the gates of High Hrothgar.
Arngeir was meditating in the main chamber, and though she tried to be quiet, he heard her footsteps and looked up as she approached. "Dragonborn," he said, getting to his feet. "I did not expect you."
Alayne bowed her head. "The Blades asked me to kill Paarthurnax," she said quietly. "And I didn't tell you because I thought it would make things worse. I'm sorry, Master Arngeir. You were right about me."
She felt Arngeir's wrinkled hand tilt her chin up, saw just the hint of a smile in his eyes. "The first step to enlightenment is admitting folly. I too was wrong to lose my temper with you." His expression hardened. "And the Blades?"
"They won't be a problem. I talked them down."
"You see?" said the old Greybeard, relaxing once more into his usual serene self. "Proof that words and wisdom are more powerful than swords and barbarism. Kynareth has given you a great gift, Dragonborn. Use it well."
Alayne bowed respectfully, though she did mark the faint note of triumph in Arngeir's voice. Even the wisest were still human, after all. Except one.
This time, she walked the wide path up to Paarthunax's roost, clearing the way with her Shout. By the time she reached the top, it was getting toward sunset. Her throat ached, but her shoulders and legs felt much better than last time.
The elder dragon was waiting for her. "Drem Yol Lok, Dovahkiin," he said. "I believe this belongs to you."
With a flick of his tail, he sent her dagger spinning through the air. Alayne caught it by the hilt and smiled hesitantly up at the dragon, and although he didn't exactly have human expressions, she could have sworn she saw him smile back.
"I wish to meditate on a word," she said. "On Drem."
Paarthurnax breathed gently in her direction, warm air soothing the aches from her climb.
"Drem. Peace. It is more than the absence of violence. It is harmony, unity, a oneness with earth and sky, sil and lein."
"Do you think you've achieved it?"
He blinked, clearly taken aback by her question. "I would not go so far," he said slowly. "It is not easy for a dovah to be at peace."
"I think you're too hard on yourself." Alayne reached out with gloved hands, resting them against the tip of his wing. "I think you could achieve drem. You just need to learn to forgive yourself."
Paarthurnax made a low rumbling sound. "And so the student seeks to teach the master," he said thoughtfully. "Yet there is onikaan, wisdom, in your words. I will meditate on them."
Alayne smiled as she sat at the base of his Wall, assuming the kneeling meditation position taught to her by the Greybeards. Paarthurnax took up his usual spot at the top of the wall. But before she closed her eyes, Paarthurnax spoke again.
"Dovahkiin?"
"Yes?"
"Unslaad werid, briinah. Thank you."
That evening, for the first time since her hurried flight into Skyrim, Alayne felt at peace.
