-Bullet and Sword-
A Sinon x Kirito =) I'm a Kirito x Asuna shipper
as well xD I just wanted to give this pairing some
love xD No one acknowledges them much T^T
Don't hate me please xD
"It doesn't even matter if I die…" I said…
He grabbed my wrist. This person that I just met along this week. Who the hell does he think he is?!
"Let go of me. I have to go," I told him.
I kept shaking my wrist, trying to get his grip off of me. But instead he grabbed my wrist with more force. But, it was more of a 'calm down' rather than an offending force.
His black eyes were sparkling. He muttered some words that shook my heart just a little.
"Sinon…you're wrong. No one will die alone. Once someone dies, their position in someone's heart will vanish too. You're already existing in my heart, Sinon!" Kirito declared.
I was shocked a bit. But nonetheless, I needed him to understand.
"It's not like I asked you to remember me... I, I never hoped to have a relationship with anyone!" I shouted back at him, tears threatening to fall from my eyes.
He raised my hand and held it to his face.
At this caring action, all these pain that were hidden in my icy and unyielding heart all burst out. I gritted my teeth to prevent myself from crying too loud and used my other hand to grab Kirito's collar.
"Then..." I started to say.
The feeling of wanting to be comforted and the urge to be destroyed created this…emotion I never encountered before, causing me to subsconciously say these words out that were planted deep inside my very soul. I stared into Kirito's calm, black eyes.
"—THEN PROTECT ME FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!" I shouted at him, unaware that I was inching closer to him every second.
I got furious for some reason and started to release all my anger onto him, pounding on his chest, letting my fury vent out.
"You don't know anything about me! You don't know what I've done! Stop acting like you do!" I yelled at him, he just silently stared back.
I held up my hand that he was still holding in his.
"HERE! CAN YOU POSSIBLY HOLD ONTO THIS HAND THAT KILLED AND SHED SOMEONE ELSE'S BLOOD BEFORE?!" I furiously yelled out, screamed, shouted, whatever, all I know was that I was conversing in a loud manner.
I kept on hitting him as hard as I can. Each time, his HP started to decrease; however, he wouldn't do anything to defend himself.
I finally ran out of strength and stopped hitting him. My left hand was still grabbing onto his collar as I sobbed. I didn't want anyone else to see me crying, I let my head prop onto Kirito's chest.
"I hate you…I hate you…you're the worst…" I told him whilst continuously sobbing. My tears disappeared into the air; most of them were absorbed by Kirito's chest.
He pulled me into an embrace and slid down until we were both sat on the ground. We didn't know how long we maintained that position. I just didn't care.
I calmed down after a few minutes. Silence enveloped us. I felt weak. After crying and exerting all my anger, I felt sore.
Silence continued to go between us. I kept on noticing how warm Kirito is. His warmth, his presence is calming. And to add, his embrace and firm hands around me, ensuring me that I'm safe.
"Don't get too comfortable, Sinon. This won't last forever. You'll separate eventually," reminded my inner self.
But nonetheless, at least let me cherish this moment and comfort for a bit longer…
Night time fell upon us. I finally broke the silence.
"You might be irritating but…at least let me lean on you," I told Kirito.
He nodded his head in understanding.
I laid down horizontally on his legs and turned my back on him.
"I've…killed someone before," I confessed to him.
Without waiting for his response, I continued.
"Not in a game. But in the real world. It was a robbery. They said that the thief died because the gun chamber exploded. But it was me all along. I shot him 5 years ago," I confessed.
Silence ensued. I continued.
"Trying to overcome my fear of guns, I ended up here. In a world full of guns, I thought that I would become fearless. My theory was that, if I became strong here, I'll be strong in the real world. But, when Death Gun tried to attack just a while ago, I felt that this me right now, isn't Sinon but me of the real world," I rambled on.
"Of course I'm scared of dying. But if I continue to live in fear and run away from fighting Death Gun, then I'll be more scared than ever! I'll even be scared if I'm dead…that's why…" I suddenly stopped. Why? I can't remember why exactly…
As I gathered my scattered thoughts, I felt Kirito pull me into a hug.
"I-I…I've also killed people before…" he said in a voice merely above a whisper.
For a split second I felt his body tremble slightly.
I let him continue. It was my turn to listen now.
"You are aware of the game, Sword Art Online, right?" he asked me.
"Of course." I mean, everyone in Japan would know. It was the most controversial issue ever discussed in this century.
"In that game, there was a guild called, Laughing Coffin. Their guild was purposely built for people who loved killing other players," he explained while looking towards the distance.
"But…doesn't it mean that…if your HP reaches zero…doesn't it mean death in the real world?" I asked curiously.
"Yes. People made a crusade to stop them. I was one of them. I personally killed two Laughing Coffin members. One was with a hit to his head; the other was stabbed in the heart. I was only trying to send them to jail. But I guess I lost it at that time. No, that was just an excuse. If I actually wanted to, I could've stopped my sword…but I could only swing my sword in anger and fear. I guess I was no different from them. In a certain sense, I have greater guilt than they will ever have because..." he trailed off shakily.
He took a deep breath forcefully as if he was trying no to let all his pain gush out…
"I've already killed someone before those two. I was trying to forget what had happened in the past…and I guess...it all just…happened," he admitted with a tone of doubt.
I grabbed his shoulders and stared into his eyes.
"Tell me how you did it. Tell me how you overcame your fears. Tell me how did you become so strong?" I asked him.
I was desperate. I wanted to fight this fear of mine, but yet, I couldn't.
"I haven't overcome it…" Kirito admitted.
"…I was afraid that you'll say that," I replied. I lost all the strength in my arms and fell on top of him as I faced towards the night sky.
He hugged me tightly. "Don't worry. I'll help you overcome it. You'll have to help me too," he mumbled.
"Agreed," I replied.
We both stared into the night sky.
"Hey, Kirito," I called.
"Hm? Is something the matter?" he looked at me worriedly.
I turned around to face him. Our faces were merely inches apart.
"Oh well, now or never…"
I brought my face closer to his and…kissed him.
The kiss ended as fast as it had started. But, in that singe kiss, all emotions were exposed. All my feelings. Everything.
"Wh-what was that for?" he stammered.
"As thanks," I replied smugly. However, I was aware that a blush was creeping up to my face.
"I-I see," he calmed down and we remained in the same silence as before.
"Kirito…what am I to you?" I asked.
Silence was passed between us until he finally replied…
"I guess that...you're the bullet that was shot into me. So deep in me that I wouldn't want anyone to take it out because it would probably too painful," he confessed whist scratching his head.
"Hmm…nice answer. Although it's only been a week…I feel as if you're the sword that has pierced into my very soul and heart. The sword that brought light, life, and warmth. That's what I think of you," I answered back as I fell down on him again.
Silence once again fell upon us. It was fine. We had said how we felt. There's nothing left to do.
Kirito hugged me more. I guess that was his way of saying that he understood.
I closed my eyes as I pressed myself against him more. Feeling his warmth, digging deep into his embrace.
Maybe…just maybe…this wasn't so bad after all…
Please don't be mad at me Asuna x Kirito fans! T^T I love them too! xD It's just…no one ever acknowledges these too ;^; Love it? Hate it? Review please xD
^.WinterCradle.^
