Hey, y'all. I'm a cowboy- I mean Career. I also just so happen to have a southern accent.

My name is simple. It's Mason Mason. In hindsight, the name's rather idiotic. Like me!

Don't bother askin' why I'm a cowboy thousands o' years after they lived? I'm pretty sure it's Painem's form of hipster. I've never been to school. I was too busy trainin'. See, for us one dimensional Sector 2 citizens, that seems to be all we do.

My hobbies include long walks on the beach, punching things, being implied to have had or is having sex, and having a beard. Yeah, that's a hobbie. If your beard is awesome enough.

Today is the Choosing. I think I may be the most sympathetic person here.

A woman, who, due to my refusal of referencing the whole 'Ledger' thing, I cannot compare to anyone else.

"Wow. I am kind of scared to be here," She spat out, "No offense, but you all look like token antagonists."

"Hey, that's offensive!" I yelled at her. It IS true, but still offensive.

"Too bad!" She yelled back, "Let's choose the male canon fodder- I mean Contestant."

She pulled a piece of paper out of a novelty over-sized ball. "This year's male Contestant is... Weakly McTwelve!"

OH NOES! Weakly McTwelve is the weakest, twelve year old-est, most flat and boring character in this Sector! At least a dozen guys, including me, volunteered for Contestant. I don't know why, but for some reason none of us get sympathy points for doing this.

After punching out a few other guys, (I think I may see why we're not sympathetic...) I finally get to be this year's Contestant! Yeah, I get to be sent to my death!

... Damn, I'm this story's Kamuss Evermean, aren't I?


Originally, Mason was supposed to say at the end that it was a short chapter. But hey, how could I miss the opportunity to reference someone who isn't relevant yet?

Here's the list of Contestants I need:

Sector 3 Male.

Sector 4 Female.

Sector 5 Male.

Sector 5 Female.

Sector 6 Male.

Sector 8 Male.

Sector 10 Female.

Sector 11 Female.

Thanks for reading, and please review/submit!