Ex-V: Dear, Beloved fans.
I am much, much better now, and I hope that this chapter makes up for the long, long wait.
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Break it down now….
Dear God, would you just shut up? Drew twitched, furious. Why couldn't he just get a moments peace?
You've been living in my head for over a year and a half! Why don't you just leave?
I can't. Besides, I wouldn't even be here right now if you'd had enough courage to propose.
"I'm still working on it!"Drew snapped out loud, frightening a small child walking past.
Geez. Calm down. I'm so nice to you, you should be thanking me.
Thanking you? Are you kidding? You've caused me soooo much humiliation and misery…
Oh yeah? Name one time.
Well, let's see. Last week, Tuesday. You possessed my body, touched May inappropriately, and then faded away, leaving ME to explain why I was feeling her up in the middle of the CHILDREN'S MUSUEM!!
Oh yeah! Goooood times. It was hilarious, you have to admit.
Maybe for you. I was the one who had to sleep on the couch for a week.
So I embarrassed you ONE TIME. Who cares? I bet you can't name another.
Last month, Valentines Day. You possessed my body just so you could sing a song out loud. You finished SexyBack, and then sang Animals for Ten Minutes before you realized YOU WERE STANDING AT A PODIUM!! I HAD BEEN GIVING ALECTURE TO THE COORDINATOR'S SOCIETY!
Ahhhh…I'm so great.
SHUT UP YOU SOUND LIKE ME!
Good job, buddy. How bout opening your eyes. Maybe if you do you'll see that you've been talking to your apartment door for five minutes.
Shut. Up. Right. Now. Drew hissed, knocking on the door.
"Come in!" May yelled.
Drew did, wiping his feet off on the mat. "Ummm…May….I have a question."
"What's that?" she replied, not taking her eyes of the lasagna she was preparing.
"Do you think I could sleep in the bed again tonight?"
"NO! After the way you slapped my ass in front of the landlord, you should be happy I don't make you sleep outside!"
"But honey, IT WASN'T ME!"
"I SAW YOU, Drew!"
"I know, but it's….Like….NOT ME!"
"NO, and that's final. Now eat up or you don't get any all month."
"Unfair…so unfair. You'r using sex to control me."
"Yup!" She said, smiling brightly.
Drew grumbled. "How about this. A pokemon battle. If I win, I get some TONIGHT."
"What if I win?"
"I'll…buy you a trip to the day spa downtown."
May's eyes lit up. She tried to resist, but the salon called to her. "Fine. You won't win anyway."
Drew chose a pokeball, and on the opposite side of the field, May picked one out as well. Simultaneously, they whipped the balls onto the field.
Blaizeken appeared with a roar on one side, and Flygon on the other.
"Blaizeken, Flame Wheel!" The pokemon dashed forward, flames streaming from it's wrists. It launched itself into the air, unleashing a superheated burst of flames.
Flygon shot upwards at the last second, expertly dodging its opponents attack.
"Sandstorm!" Drew commanded, and his pokemon hastened to obey. Flygon soared even higher into the sky, whipping up dust and soil. It flapped its incredible wings, and in seconds the dirt was a roaring tornado, arcing through the air towards Blaizeken.
"Dodge, Quickly!" May shouted. Unfortunately, Blaizekin was a second too slow. The Whirlwind drilled into him dead on, sending the pokemon spiraling into the ground.
"Hyper Beam!" Drew howled, and an orange beam of light filled the sky. Blaizeken had just enough time to get to its feet before it was caught by the blast.
Blaizeken Flew across the field, propelled by the sheer power of its opponents greatest attack.
When the fire pokemon slammed into a tree at the other side of the field, May knew it was over. Blaizeken slumped down, unconscious.
May groaned, looking over at her overconfident boyfriend. Drew was looking arrogant as usual, now that his precious sex was assured.
