Long ago there were four children,
All of them brave and noble.
Three boys and one girl they were,
And soon they went global.
The first was Ness
And the second was Paula.
They had distance between them,
But it wasn't from here to Guatemala.
Then came Jeff the smart-ass
And a would-be monk named Poo.
They had loads of useful assets,
Like intelligence and kung fu.
They fought hippies and sentient plants,
And no I'm not making this shit up.
Heck, they even performed an unholy abortion on Giygas!
Man this must've been made on drugs, yup.
Did I mention, by the way, that they were seduced
By Venus, a hot as hell MILF?
Hey, don't worry now.
It wasn't any "The Graduate" filth.
And now, after all is said and done,
I'm happy to say
That the story lives on in Lucas and company
And we're looking forward to a glorious day.
