TEN
Amanda spent the next ten minutes pacing slowly around the lobby while she waited for Melinda. After what seemed like an eternity, she spotted her car outside the window and headed for the door.
She walked over to her car and opened the door.
"What happened to you?" Melinda asked when she saw Amanda's blood-soaked shirt.
Amanda lifted her shirt to show her the bandage. "Broken window, car accident. I jumped in." She said as she sat down in the passenger seat.
"Damn." Melinda said as she pulled away from the curb. "What time did you leave the house? You look exhausted."
Amanda laughed lightly. "It was just after midnight."
"Why?" Melinda asked.
"I couldn't sleep… I started running when I started going to G.A." She told Melinda.
Melinda nodded. "Definitely a better option."
Amanda cried out when the car hit a bump in the road, and pain shot through her side.
Melinda winced. "Sorry about that, I didn't even see it."
Amanda nodded. "It's fine." She said.
"Did the doctor give you anything for the pain?" Melinda asked.
Amanda shook her head. "No, I wouldn't let him."
"Why?" Melinda asked.
"I uh… I liked them a little too much in college." Amanda told her quietly.
Melinda nodded. "I didn't mean to pry."
Amanda shrugged. "It's alright." She said. "Liv knows… I told her, but it's not really something I like to talk about."
Melinda nodded. "I get it. How are you planning on dealing with the pain?"
"Tylenol." Amanda said flatly.
"Hopefully that works." Melinda said.
Amanda nodded.
Melinda pulled in behind Olivia's car and put the car in park.
"Thanks again Melinda." Amanda said.
Melinda smiled. "Anytime."
Amanda grabbed the door handle and pushed the door open. "I'll see you later." She said as she stepped out of the car.
Melinda nodded. "I'll let you know when I get the DNA results. Should be in sometime tomorrow."
Amanda nodded. "Alright." She waved and closed the car door.
Amanda sighed and looked up at the tall apartment building. She unlocked the front door and pulled it open, and unlocked the second door as well.
The stairs hurt just as much as she thought they would on the way up. She stepped out of the stairwell on the fourth floor and walked down the hall to her own apartment door.
She unlocked the door open and pushed it open and was surprised to see the living room light on and Olivia sitting on the couch with her laptop.
Frannie got up and walked over to her, sniffing her legs.
Olivia looked up when Amanda said hi to Frannie, and her jaw dropped.
"Manda? What happened? Are you okay? Is this your blood? Is this someone else's blood?" Olivia asked, tossing her laptop aside and rushing toward Amanda.
Amanda put her hands up in front of her to stop Olivia from touching her side.
"I'm okay, it's mine. Let me change and I'll tell you all about it." Amanda told her.
Olivia kissed her cheek softly. "Okay." She said. She walked back over to the couch, watching Amanda closely as she toed off her running shoes and walked toward the bedroom.
Amanda took off her shirt slowly, which she found very hard to do without stretching her ribs. She struggled for a moment before she got her right arm out and was able to pull the top off.
She tossed the shirt on the floor, figuring she would throw it in the garbage later, but she would more likely try to save it, because it was one of her favorite shirts, even though it was Olivia's.
She changed her shorts and pulled her sweatpants and tank top back on and she leaned on the foot of the bed.
She really wasn't looking forward to the conversation she was about to have with Olivia. She knew her girlfriend wouldn't love the idea of her going out for a midnight job instead of waking up to talk.
She sighed and stood up straight and walked back out to the living room.
When she walked around the couch and sat down, leaning back against the arm so she could toss her legs over Olivia's lap, she found the brunette's expression to be rather unreadable.
Olivia smiled softly and rested her hands on Amanda's legs, massaging her calves gently.
"So what happened?" Olivia asked.
Amanda sighed. "I couldn't sleep, so I went out for a jog, and there was a car accident. I went to help."
Olivia nodded. "Where did all the blood come from?"
Amanda sighed and lifted her tank top up for her to see the bandage.
"Me."
Olivia's eyes widened and she reached out, running her fingers along the bruise that had formed around the bandage.
"Jesus Amanda, what happened?" Olivia asked.
Amanda shrugged. "There was a car on its side, and there was a teenage boy and his mom, and there was a baby in the back seat. We got the baby out, and Mason climbed out on his own, and I slid in the window. I guess I cut it on some glass. I didn't even notice it until Mason pointed it out."
Olivia nodded. "Is everyone okay?" She asked.
Amanda nodded. "Yeah, they're all gonna be fine."
Olivia nodded. "Good, that's good. How many stitches?" She asked.
Amanda grimaced. "Thirty."
Olivia nodded. "What time did you leave? It's almost four thirty." Olivia said. "And how did you get home?"
"I left just after midnight, and I called Melinda from the hospital. She gave me a ride home."
Olivia nodded. "Since when are you and Melinda that close?" She asked lightheartedly.
Amanda smiled. "Since she held a bucket of my vomit yesterday."
Olivia grimaced, then laughed. "Alright then."
Amanda tried to laugh but cut herself off immediately when pain shot through her side.
She knew Olivia saw the look on her face, and she felt her tense up to try and stop the pain but tensing only made it worse.
"Nothing for the pain, huh?" Olivia asked softly.
Amanda looked down at her hands, shaking her head. "No." She said quietly.
"Want a few Tylenol?" Olivia asked.
Amanda nodded. "Please."
Olivia lifted her legs gently off her lap and stood. She walked into the kitchen and grabbed the key for the locked medicine cabinet over the fridge and unlocked it.
She shook two tablets out of the bottle and brought them out to Amanda with a glass of water.
"Thanks." Amanda said softly.
Olivia sat down on the coffee table beside Amanda.
"You okay?" She asked softly.
Amanda nodded. "Yeah… I just needed out." She said softly.
Olivia squeezed her hand. "I get it."
Amanda looked up at her. "Does it bother you?" She asked suddenly.
Olivia was confused. "Does what bother me?"
Amanda bit her lip. "Me… all of my… problems… the gambling, the…" she trailed off. She couldn't bring herself to say, 'the drugs', which was a thing of the past. Fifteen years in the past.
Olivia shook her head. "You know it doesn't Manda. You're getting help, that's all that matters to me." She reminded her.
Amanda nodded. "What… what about Allison?" She asked.
"What do you mean? Why would Allison bother me?" Olivia asked, even more confused now.
Amanda looked up at her. "When I was pregnant, I spent so much time worrying that my baby would be like their father… and now… I'm worried she'll end up like me."
Olivia bit her lip. "Manda…" She said quietly, trying to think of the right thing to say.
Amanda sighed. "I mean, violence might not be genetic, but addiction is. And after everything she's been through…"
Olivia shook her head. "But baby the difference is, everything you went through when you were young… you didn't have anyone to help you. You were on your own. She isn't."
Amanda nodded silently. "I know… I just… I'm scared."
Olivia smiled softly. "You're her mom Manda, if you weren't scared, I'd be worried." She told her. "But she will have all of the love and support that she needs to make sure she's alright."
Amanda nodded.
"Can I tell you something?" Olivia asked softly.
Amanda nodded. "Yeah, of course."
Olivia smiled softly. "I'm scared too." She said softly. "I don't know how to be a mom… My mom, if anything, she was just an example of what not to do."
"You're amazing with her though." Amanda told her softly.
Olivia nodded. "So are you. She trusts you, she did as soon as she met you."
Amanda reached up to wipe a tear off her own cheek. "You're the one who saved her." She said quietly.
Olivia stood up and sat down on the couch beside Amanda, making sure to sit on Amanda's uninjured side.
"Do you remember, after Lewis… you told me that we'd get through everything together?" Olivia asked softly.
Amanda sniffled. "Yeah."
Olivia kissed her temple. "This is one of those things. We knew it wasn't gonna be easy."
Amanda nodded. "We knew caring for other people's kids wouldn't be easy… Allison is mine… ours… it's so much worse." She said sadly.
Olivia nodded. "Yeah. We have the risk of really screwing her up." Olivia said.
"Was that supposed to make me feel better?" Amanda asked.
Olivia laughed. "I wasn't finished." She told her. "Yeah, we run the risk of screwing her up, but she's only four. That means we have the rest of her life to help her. Even if we make mistakes, we can fix them Manda." She said softly.
Amanda nodded. "I know… it's… I don't even know how to explain it."
Olivia nodded. "You don't have to be able to explain it right now baby."
"I just don't want to cause her any more pain."
Olivia leaned her head against Amanda's. "And that feeling is what'll make sure that you don't. That little girl will only know love from now on."
Amanda leaned into her girlfriend. "Thank you."
Olivia squeezed her gently. "I love you."
Amanda smiled softly. "I love you too."
"Wanna try and get some sleep?" Olivia asked.
Amanda nodded. "Yeah… has Allison woken up at all?"
Olivia nodded. "Yeah, around one, she had a nightmare. She settled pretty quickly though. She's alright now."
"That's good."
Olivia stood and held her hands out to Amanda. "C'mon, let's sleep."
Amanda took Olivia's hands and allowed herself to be helped off the couch and down the hall.
Olivia helped her climb up onto the bed and pulled the covers over her before sliding in beside her.
Olivia opened her arms and Amanda slid into her, cuddling close, and trying not to disturb her stitches.
"I'm right here if you need anything." Olivia told her softly.
Amanda nodded. "Love you." She mumbled, already half asleep.
