Two sisters, Dúrwen and Ólsel, are talking before bed about the men that they love. Dúrwen starts.

"So sis, guess who I saw today? Bórdír, that sexy beast!"

"He's blazin', but Culas is the hottest of everyone!"

"Nah, yo' screwed up, Bórdír's killed mad rival gangs, and your man Culas is a moron!"

"Wha' the hell yo' talkin' 'bout?! He's smarter than Bórdír, who thought an orc was Fangorn! That orc killed mad elves 'cause o' him!"

"He was mad tired!"

"More like he was mad dumb." mumbled Ólsel to herself. "Culas's ol' man was in the Last Alliance"

"He ran away! Culas is an ass."

"Oh no yo' di'nt!"

"Oh yah I did!"

A catfight ensues, and then their father Halion walks in.

"Stop tha' crap 'fo' I slap ya upside the head!"

"Ólsel was rankin' on Bórdír!"

"Dúrwen was rankin' on Culas!"

"Shut ya' mouths 'fo' I beat the shit outta ya! Dúrwen, yo' got yo' man, and Ólsel yo' got yo man, so shut up."

"K, but Culas still trippin'" mumbled Dúrwen to herself

"I heard dat!"

"Damn you"

Now for the same conversation/argument, but in a more Elvish style.

"Sister, today I saw Bórdír, who is very beautiful."

"He is so, but Culas is the fairest of all"

"Sister, you are mistaken. Bórdír has slain many enemies, and Culas lacks intelligence."

"What is this that you speak of? He is more intelligent than Bórdír, who believed an orc was Fangorn. An orc does not appear to be an ent, dear sister. That orc slayed many elves due to his fault."

"Bórdír was weary, and it was necessary that he sleep, however, he did not."

"The more likely circumstance was that he was lacking in intelligence" mumbled Ólsel to herself. "The father of Culas was in the Last Alliance."

"He fled. Culas is orc dung."

"Tell me that you did not do what it appears that you did."

"I did do what it appears that I did."

A heated argument ensues, and their father, Halion walks in.

"Cease that before I must punish you."

"Father, Ólsel insults Bordír!"

"Dúrwen insults Culas!"

"Cease speaking before I must bring harm to your body! Ólsel, you have your love, and Dúrwen, you have your's. They both have great worth in them, and it must be respected."

"I give my consent to you, however,Culas is without logic."

"I heard that."

"I feel disgust at you."