OMG I'm SOOOOOOOO SORRY that it took me so long to update! Around when I was at chapter ten, I started displaying weird symptoms, but not to go into anything in detail, I went and had brain surgery this summer. I'm leaving for Chicago in a few days, actually, to perhaps have more. But to all my (few) fans-
I'M SO SORRY! bawls
Thanks to all my faithful reviewers- I went back and read your comments, and I feel all fuzzy inside. Thanks for the green monkeys, cheese and other such joys. You guys rock green monkeys! (And a nice bit of Gorgonzola.)
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Disclaimer: Who cares?
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Chapter 10
Voldemort was stunned, frozen in place at the spectacle in his plotting room. It was filled with people. Death Eaters in brightly colored robes, sipping kool-aid in swirling hues, wandered the room and began to make pleasant conversation. A small group of guitarists and Japanese personnel were huddling in one corner, strumming their instruments, adjusting microphones, and chittering to each other in hurried Japanese. Another group of musicians were at the other side of the room, strumming ukuleles, blasting out accordion tunes, apologizing loudly for their interruption of their merriment, and warning everyone that, when they begin playing and singing, the group assembled had better not show any sign that they are enjoying the music. This was bringing Kali and her band of friends to fits of hysterical and uncontrollable giggles.
Other witches and wizards were meandering around the room, sending him little side-glances as they whispered about the supposed "Dark Lord." Some children were there, playing with wands and sending sparks everywhere. Other children, older teenagers who were from Hogwarts or other wizarding schools, were helping out their parents or the hired bands set up the extra, un-set-up items for the big event.
Becky quickly left where she had blown the fake trumpet blare and rolled the drum so that she couldn't be identified and headed over to a man who was playing the accordion for the second group of musicians. She was talking animatedly with him, discussing something about "wonderful author" and "famous, depressing books" while he thanked her with grace and discussed his plans for the Baudelaire orphans in the last book. She was smiling widely, but when she noticed that Voldemort had entered the room, she excused herself, saying in a rushed whisper, "Tell Stephin that he needs to start up!" When asked what they were to play, she hissed back, "I Wish I Had An Evil Twin!" and ran up to the evil man.
She briefly pinched the cruel master of evil deeds in the arm, and he squealed spectacularly. Voldemort glared at her, looking livid, but she just grinned her in her usual, far-too-optimistic way, and the band started up. She smiled over at the man she had been talking to a moment before, whispered "Thanks, Daniel- I mean, Lemony!" and walked over to Cherry, who was up against the wall and strumming her balalaika mindlessly.
"Ready?" Becky asked. Cherry gritted her teeth and nodded. Becky waved her wand, and softly whispered, "Commence plan."
Cherry looked up, blank face holding as much forgetfulness as it is possible to hold. "I forgot what I was going to ask…" she muttered, then seemed to remember. "Oh, yes! What are you going to say to Voldemort?"
Becky sighed. "I have nothing to say," she mumbled. "Kali's plan won't work after all."
Cherry looked panicked, but Becky shushed her. "Play," she hissed, and walked up to Voldemort.
"Let's boogie!" she said, grinning, noticing with worry that Voldemort didn't think the Charlie and the Chocolate Factory reference was funny. Hastily, she began to dance the Funky Chicken as Cherry started up.
Kali ran up to Becky right at that moment, along with all her little friends. "Hey, Becky!" she said excitedly. "Here are my new friends." She turned to her little bunch of girls behind her. "This is Maegann," she began, and a grinning girl with long brown hair waved happily. "This is Qatherinn," she continued, and a slightly frowning girl raised a hand in a silent wave. Kali finally turned to the last two girls there, a tall black girl with glasses and her load, a short girl with long blond hair and an overload of makeup. "Lastly, these are Elantra and Autumn," she said, indicating each in turn. Elantra waved with a toothy smile, while Autumn, who was unconscious, just lay there in Elantra's arms.
Elantra leaned in to Becky so that she could be heard over both the Funky Chicken and "Evil Twin." "She's so excited to be here," she said, grinning ridiculously, "that she passed out when she saw the Order coming up the street."
Becky blanched, eyes growing wide. "You're kidding!" she hissed. "They can't be coming!" As she saw Voldemort heading her way, she ran over to the window. Sure enough, walking up the drive was the entire Order of the Phoenix, wands lit and held high in the impending darkness.
She panicked as the song ended and the other band began their music. "Me, Japanese Boy!" came from the other side of the room as Becky began to breath hard, breath growing shallow. In a haze of worry, she Apparated up to Debbie and hissed, "Cake! Refreshments! Now! And the gifts!" Without another word, she left to get the Twister game.
Kali left her group of friends, who immediately looked a little relieved to not have to follow her around anymore. Qatherinn and Maegann went up to the first band, while Elantra headed over to a luv sac and placed Autumn down on it, rolling her eyes. Qatherinn was staring intently up at the Magnetic Fields, while Maegann was glaring over at Pizzicato Five. After a moment, Qatherinn stepped up on stage and strode right up to Stephin Merritt, the lead singer and instrumentalist, and held out her hand. Coldly, she stated, "You signed a poster for me."
While Stephin recognized her as the devoted fan he had once given a prized birthday present to, Becky gave Twister to Kali. Then, she went up to Debbie and hissed shrilly, "The cake! Serve! Now!" With a hurried nod, Kali's mother hurried over to the refreshment table and began slicing the cake.
Voldemort walked right up to Becky, who was beginning to allow something along the lines of panic cross her face. Taking care of an entire party with so much planned was exhausting, and the Dark Lord approaching didn't make anything any better. With a small hiss that set her skin crawling, he said softly, "What is going on here?"
Becky began to fiddle with the hem of her robes. "Oh, it's your birthday," she said, hiding almost all traces of nervousness from her voice. "We just wanted to make it special!" Voldemort began to protest, but Becky quickly shushed him. "Want to play a game?" she asked innocently.
"No."
"A card game?"
Voldemort seemed to think about it this time. A game was different from a CARD game.
After a moment, he nodded. "Okay," he replied, seeming to regret the idea the moment he said it. Becky grinned.
She led him over to the small table in the corner, then as she said, "You wait here," she leapt up and ran over to Elantra.
"Elantra, buddy, good pal o' mine," she said hurridly, while Elantra gave her a thoroughly weird look, "could you do me a huge favor and go watch the Order and tell me when they arrive? Pretty please?"
Elantra shrugged. "As long as it means I'm back before Pizzicato Five is playing 'Twiggy, Twiggy.'" With just a thumbs-up at the band she was referring to, she turned around and left.
Becky could breathe a little easier as she sat back down across the table from Voldemort and began to deal cards with a shaky hand. Twenty cards had already been given to the both of them, and now she had to hand five cards to each. As she explained the rules of Spite and Malice, Qatherinn, up on the stage alongside Stephin Merritt, began to sing along with him, which woke up Autumn. Maegann ran over and immediately began talking to her, to her great annoyance. Who wants to talk to some girl when you could talk to Harry Potter?
Voldemort nodded curtly as Becky finished explaining the very addictive card game and muttered, "Let's get this over with." He deftly laid down a jack of spades in a discard pile and then looked up sharply behind Becky's head.
Elantra had alighted right behind the crafty young witch, panting nervously. "The Order is in the building!" she hissed, not meaning to sound like an announcement for Elvis. "They're on the lower floor!"
Becky blanched and stood up. "Play," she said curtly and ran out of the room. Elantra sat uncomfortably across from Voldemort and waved meekly. Voldemort glared back.
The stomping of Becky's feet was loud and booming in the large house as she ran down the stairs. The group of Voldemort-defeater-wannabes was coming quickly toward her, but stopped short when she came up to Harry, who was leading the way.
Mrs. Weasley poked her head over the assembled group. "Becky?" she asked timidly. "Is that you?" When she received a panicked nod, she walked forward and gave her usual, all-encompassing hug.
Becky struggled free and frowned. "You're not supposed to be here!" she said, feeling the onset of helpless tears. The usual rock-solid witch was quickly losing it as well as her target, though not nearly as badly. "Voldemort can't see you here! He'll kill you!"
Harry smiled kindly, holding Ginny's hand firmly. "We're not here for the party. We didn't even know it was a party until we saw some of the other people flying over with gifts. By the way, did you know you invited two band entirely consisting of muggles?" Becky nodded. "Well, anyways," the raven-haired boy continued, "we actually came to check on you and make sure you were doing well," Many of the other Order members nodded.
Becky smiled weakly. "I really am thankful for your concern," she said hurridly, "and not meaning to sound rude, but—"
Remus smiled is kind smile, also holding onto a hand—Tonks'—firmly. "But you have a party to attend to," he finished for her. Becky nodded, her head almost drooping. "We understand. We'll be going." He gently guided the others in an about-face, and they called over their shoulder, "Bye, Becky! Good luck!"
"Thanks," she murmured, and turned around, heading up the stairs once more.
When she alighted on the second floor, Pizzicato Five was already playing "Strawberry Sleighride," much to the annoyance of Elantra, who had just discovered that they had already played "Twiggy, Twiggy." Meanwhile, Autumn was eagerly waiting for Becky to come up with Harry. When Becky explained that the Order had left, the tiny girl burst into tears. Maegann wandered over and tried to console her, but it was no use.
Stephin Merritt-- and Qatherinn-- were singing "Yeah! Oh, Yeah!" much to the enjoyment of the crowd. They were getting a lot of laughs, particularly since Qatherinn could sing the "nah nah nah" bit better than Stephin. They were deftly turning the volume up, trying to outsing Pizzicato Five. Becky rolled her eyes in extreme annoyance at absolutely everything she had to do and walked over to Voldemort.
He was playing cards intently with Elantra, and she informed him smugly, "You know, you have no poker face." Becky blinked when she was speaking part of her plans. "How can you rule the world without one?"
Voldemort threw down his cards. He was losing anyway. "That's it!" he roared. He stood and glared at Becky. "If I have to participate in this insipid party, can I please do something else?"
Becky nodded, easily slipping into her acting mode again. "Of course!" she practically squealed, so high that Stephin stopped singing for a moment and covered his already sensitive ears. "Present time!" she turned to the crowd and yelled, "Bring out the presents!"
With a deafening roar, everyone who had a present (surprisingly, quite a few people) ran over and placed their gift on the floor in front of the evil wizard. Becky grinned and selected a present for him to open.
For ten minutes, he was opening presents, much to his great annoyance. Then, Becky selected a special present from the stack. "This is one of the last few!" she called out. "It had better be good!" She handed it to Voldemort, hoping that the flower Kali had bought was absolutely hideous.
Voldemort took the present and gingerly unwrapped the package, shaking it slightly. He finally had removed all the paper and looked at the gift—it was a grow-yourself cactus. Qatherinn whispered something in Stephin's ear, which caused him to grin and nod. He passed it on to all the other members of his band and struck up "A Cactus Where Your Heart Should Be."
Voldemort glared furiously at Kali, but she just grinned. Placing the gift aside, Becky continued on by handing him one of the last gifts. The next package was small and almost noiseless, so it was open in his hand in about four seconds. Debbie's stress ball was small and red, perfect for a livid mastermind. He snarled this time at his cousin, but she just smiled and waved. The Dark Lord sighed angrily and demanded, "What's the last package?"
Becky grinned. "You'll have to see, but considering it's from Mrs. Weasley, I don't think we'll have a hard time figuring it out, will we?" She got a good laugh from the crowd.
Voldemort blanched, if it is even possible for him to get any paler. "Mrs. Weasley?" he sputtered. He didn't know that the item was mislabeled, of course, and was terrified of what it could be. Some Mudblood-like witch, giving him presents? The mere thought of it was disgusting. Carefully unwrapping the parcel, he stared in horror of his disgusting sweater. He automatically held it up to get a better look, and the entire assembled group burst into laughter—except for the bands and Cherry, who were much too busy and professional to do anything like that. Voldemort looked more upset than Becky had ever seen him.
Suddenly suspicious, he turned to his young pseudo-Apprentice. "What did you give me?" he asked in a very soft voice.
Becky let off a large party-popper in his face. "I'm about to give it to you! Hold on a sec."
Becky hurried right over to the Magnetic Fields, who were arguing whether or not to play "Your Long White Fingers" in homage to Voldemort. Qatherinn was in the back of the group, strumming her favorite song, "Irma," on the ukulele. In the time it had taken for the party to get in full swing, she had gotten to know everyone in the group well, and Stephin trusted her enough to play on one of his ukuleles. Becky cut right in and asked that a very special song- one of her favorite songs- to be played. They looked kind of startled, but she begged, and they cautiously started up. She quickly got Daniel Handler- AKA Lemony Snicket- to sing the song and the others to sing back-up while she went and gave the most dangerous part of the entire party to Voldemort-- the speech.
Powerful chords boomed out over the magical speakers, and Daniel, Qatherinn and Claudia all began singing as one, "Grand pianos crash together when my boy walks down the street…" They were the highest voices.
Pizzicato Five was attempting to out-play the Magnetic Fields, but Becky cut them off with an annoyed slash of her hand across her throat. The band stopped again, miffed.
Nervously, Becky looked around at the assembled guests. She addressed what little of the party was still there and motioned to Voldemort. Shifting nervously from foot to foot, she opened her mouth and began.
"Everyone," she called, her voice quivering, "this is the man we all have come to know and love. Voldemort has done some of the most amazing stuff the wizarding and muggle world alike has ever seen in their lives. He has killed Dumbledore, learned how to make drinks to rival Starbucks, and even played Twister with our children or tomorrow." She indicated Maegann and Kali, who were too busy listening to Magnetic Fields playing "When My Boy Walks Down the Street" to notice.
"Life just kinda dances through ya from your smile down to your feet…" Claudia looked nervously up at the sponsor of their private gig, wondering if she was going to make it.
Becky continued. "Yes, this is a man of many talents. Perhaps the name Voldemort doesn't demand as much respect as, say, 'Potter' or 'Dumbledore', but it is still a name worthy to be noticed. Even though Argus Filch will one day rule the world."
Daniel glanced worriedly up at Becky. She was digging a mighty deep hole for herself. They had been let in on the plan as well, and he wasn't sure that it would go very well. Unfortunately, if it didn't, then it would be going all according to plan. "Oh, shadows of echoes of memories…" he sang out, without any real conviction.
Cherry saw that Voldemort was slowly approaching Becky, but she didn't dare call out. It would seem as though she wasn't under the spell at all. Suddenly realizing that she had stopped playing, she quickly began to play along with Stephin and the rest, even though she had never heard it in her life. No one noticed.
Becky didn't notice the slowly approaching evil man. She was slowly gaining confidence. "Yes," she said, summoning up a great tear, "this is the man we will always remember as the evil pussycat we all knew and loved."
Knowing that she was taking her life into her hands, she grabbed a bottle of Inasnum, a drink that literally translated to "insanity." One small sip, and the instantly effective drink would render all common sense useless and completely dull all senses. After only a few minutes, you would barely be able to control your own actions, and could luckily not be very smart or have very good survival skills. You could easily be defeated- if you never drank very much. She poured a little of the almost deadly drink into a crystal goblet and handed it to the livid Voldemort.
"Drink up," she whispered. He snarled, downed it in one gulp, and glared at her. She watched the sense leave his eyes even as she stood there and terrifying recklessness take hold. Right at that moment, Becky realised how dangerous this all was.
"Becky!" Voldemort screeched. Just as the song was ending, he raised his wand above her head. "You have taunted me- deliberately taunted me- far too much! That is it! That is simply it! You shall die!" His hood fell back, and everyone gasped at his face. Erik, who had been hiding in the shadows in the back of the room, flashed a red noose in awe of a face more frightening than his own.
Becky began to cry.
The truly evil Voldie-kins grinned down at the helpless girl- for that was really what she was, a little girl, terrified of what she had to do, a love-stricken child who couldn't contain her emotions any longer. It all came pouring out of her in a torrent of tears. None of this softened Voldemort, however. "Give me one reason why I shouldn't," he hissed in his high, cruel voice.
Becky looked up, tears staining her face in her distress. "No!" was all she could manage to say. However, she seemed to be struggling to say something.
Not that Voldemort cared. Slowly, seeming to enjoy every second, he lowered his wand right to her neck. "Say goodbye, Becky," he whispered.
Finally, she choked out the three little words that she had been trying to say the entire time she had been there. At them, she broke down into hysterical sobbing. Everyone gasped except the emotionless people there—namely, Qatherinn and Stephin. They just raised their eyebrows. Everyone else was frozen, shocked. The three little words were:
"I… love… you!"
