Who Wants to Race Me?
DISCLAIMER/WRITER'S NOTE: Hello again. Just to remind you that I do not own SpongeBob SquarePants or Sonic the Hedgehog. SpongeBob Squarepants is owned by Stephen Hillenburg, Nickelodeon, and United Plankton, Ltd. Sonic the Hedgehog is owned by Yuji Naka, Sega, and Sonic Team. The only thing I own is the story itself. Happy Holidays and Happy 2008, and Happy Reading!
CHAPTER TWO: GOSSIP GOES AT LIGHT SPEED
It was a regular day at Bikini Bottom. The currents were blowing, the scallops were chirping, Squidward was moaning, Spongebob was flipping krabby patties, Patrick was doing nada, Mr. K was counting his moola, Plankton was scheming, and Sandy was jogging!
Lately, the Krusty Krab was losing customers. Everyone was going to the Shell Shack because their dog had learned how to play Donkey Kong and win all four levels without losing a life. Krabs was pacing the deck, while Squidward watched as if it was amusement. Mr. Krabs looked at Squidward noticeably. "Mr. Squidward, if you have any suggestions on how to get me money, I mean, customers back, you should speak up!"
"Whatever."
"Don't 'whatever' me! I'm your boss, so I can fire you whenever you seem useless!"
"I already am useless."
"Are you trying to get fired, Mr. Squidward?!"
"Yes."
"Well, too bad! You are required under law that you must work at the Krusty Krab forever! That goes for the little yellow guy, too!"
Spongebob whooped from behind the pick-up window, and landed onto the grill face first. He didn't seem to mind, since he simply did his trademark laugh, while any other Joe would have yelled with bloody murder. Spongebob was quite the oddball, but that didn't mean that Spongebob didn't enjoy the activities of the average fish.
Mr. Krabs finally stopped pacing, delayed for about three seconds, and then announced, "Boys, I've got it!"
"You do? This should be interesting," snickered Squidward.
"Oh it is! My idea is…I forgot. But I have another one! I'm giving the both of you's a promotion!" Spongebob cheered with excitement while Squidward moaned in agony. "I want you two to leave the Krusty Krab and try to find some whatchamajigger that will draw back customers!"
Spongebob dived onto Mr. Krabs and grabbed his foot. He put on a "sad wittle puppy" face. "But Mr. Krabs! Who will make the Krabby Patties? I won't be able to cook 'em if I'm not here!"
"Don't worry, boy. No one's gonna come in today anyway."
"Okay, if you insist."
As Spongebob walked out of the Krusty Krab, Spongebob heard a sound too recognizable to ignore, the sound of Sandy's pitter-pattering feet. Going too fast too break, Sandy dashed her body into Spongebob's. "Whoops! Sorry Spongebob. I was just practicing my jogging to stay in unbeatable condition!"
"Unbeatable, eh?"
"That's right! No living critter can beat me in a race!"
"Oh yeah? How about we go…now?"
"You've got yourself a date, Spongebob!"
"So we're gonna start on…"
"One-two-three-GO!!"
Sandy took off, leaving Spongebob to fall backwards. Spongebob shook himself back up, and rotated his legs in a fast motion. "Oh yeah? Well, we'll see who'll win when I activate my hydrodynamic mode!" Spongebob took off like a delayed race car, and started running at top speed…of that of a snail, compared to Sandy anyway. As much as Spongebob ran, he simply couldn't catch up to Sandy. He ran so fast he tripped several times, and he even jumped onto a bus and propelled himself using a nearby growing plant, but no matter what Spongebob tried, it failed to bring him any closer to Sandy.
Finally, they both reached the city limits, Sandy winning by a landslide. "Well, it's about time you got here, Squarepants," Sandy said triumphantly, with a bit of egotism.
"Dah—I…you, ah…doy…how do you do that?!" asked Spongebob in an aggravated and befuddled tone.
"It's just practice Spongebob. Besides, you're just a simple sea critter!"
"Yeah? Well…I bet there's at least one person in this collection of universes that is faster than you! I could swear that!"
"No way, Squarepants! There's no one alive that can beat me in a footrace!"
"Really?" Spongebob started to get an idea. Since the Krusty Krab customers were desperate for entertainment, a race consisting of the world's fastest racers could prove to be a truly exciting diversion, bringing in some more customers! "Okay, Sandy, let's make a deal. Let's have a footrace in your treedome that will be promoted by the Krusty Krab, and will include some of the world's fastest racers! If you win, I'll admit that you are the fastest creature in all the universes, not to mention a fabulous trophy to go along with that!"
"You've got yourself a deal there, Squarepants!" agreed Sandy, shaking Spongebob's hand.
The two of them parted excitedly. Sandy was about to do some serious practicing, and Spongebob was about to go break the news to Mr. Krabs, but neither of them were aware that hiding behind the sea rocks, Plankton was eavesdropping in their conversation. "So…a race between the world's fastest racers, eh? This gives me an idea…"
Plankton dashed to the Chum Bucket, his less-than-appealing abode. He made a stunning entrance into his laboratory to converse with Karen, his computer wife. "Karen! Access my e-mail inbox! I need to make a composition to an old friend…roboegg, better known as… Dr. Eggman!"
"Could you at least give me a friendly 'hello'?"
"Fine. Hello," Plankton said, rushed and irritated.
"Close enough. Here you go," Karen replied, as she accessed Plankton's e-mail system.
"Last time I heard from Doc, he was in some competition in Beijing. Said he was against a blue hedgehog and a red-capped super plumber. I think he's available by now. Karen, type this in! 'Dear Eggman, it's your old virtual school buddy, Plankton! I was just eavesdropping on an egotistical land mammal, boasting that she is the fastest creature in the world. Knowing about your blue opponent, I've decided to invest a bit in this 'race' that the local burger joint is hosting, to invite your enemy and any other of his little friends that would dare to enter. Now, to make things a bit more 'interesting', I've set up a devious scheme that includes your assistance, and a bit of trickery. All I need you to do is…'" Plankton explained his villainous plot to Eggman in his e-mail, to be revealed further into the story. "'…Signed, Plankton.'"
Plankton hit the "send" button, and the e-mail was whisked away to Eggman, as Plankton laughed maniacally, eagerly awaiting the day of the race, and while this happened, a disturbed doctor started to do his part in the arrangement…
In the next chapter, the view will switch from Bikini Bottom to Beijing, or Station Square, or Mobius, or whatever you call the Sonic World. By the way, if you have any suggestions on any character from any type of pop culture that you think could compete in the race which will be in a later chapter, feel more than free to private message me, and be sure to explain who is that character you're entering and from what universe he or she is from. I hope you keep reading, and remember to review this story for supportive criticism.
Until next time, reader!
