Okay, wow.

Not dead, but pretty darn close to it.

This is all I can update at the moment. FANBAM is next.

I am so tired.

And I blame you.

(Points at a stack of papers and books)

So sorry for the short chapter.

DISCLAIMER: I own none of the original!

NOTE: Yes. I realize you guys are smart. I deliberately made it easy to tell that Tami was an Irken. This way, the humor of Dib finding out would be that much funnier because it was under his nose the entire time. So Michelle, sorry to burst your bubble, but the readers are better thinkers then you think. Think about it… THINK, THINK, THINK!

Think a dink a tink… yaaaay…

Dib rolled about in his bed, feeling restless. Tami was getting to be a handful, and he wasn't sure what to do.

"I am supposed to save the world, not play babysitter," I muttered. Zim was serious threat, very, very serious.What if Zim were to pull something, and I was too busy teaching Tami how to make finger paint pictures? Or baking a cake in an E-Z Bake Oven? Or (and heaven forbid) about the birds and the bees?

I felt my stomach shrink in size at the mere thought. I mean, I would be able to give the Talk much better than my father, or my sister… but it would be so disturbing! What if I say something wrong and she does something? I shouldn't have to worry about this kind of thing.Tami's parents must have given her the talk, RIGHT?!

"Mr. Dibby, I can't sleep…"

"The stork does it! It's the stork, okay!" I screamed, and pointed at the direction of the door. Tami just stood there, looking a bit frightened, and very confused.

Quickly, I tried to correct the situation.

"I mean… the… um, dream stork. It pecks at your brain and keeps you awake!"

I thought that was a brilliant cover up, up until she burst into tears and ran off screaming, 'help, help!'

0o0

Gaz was minding her own business, when Tami ran into her room. Her first instinct was to kick the brat out as quickly as possible, when Tami started blubbering about going blind.

"Mr. Dibby said that a big stroke will peck out my eyes! I don't wanna have a stroke, I don't wanna!" Tami wailed, pulling at Gaz's arms.

"A stroke? Why would…"

"I went in and said that I couldn't sleep, and he yelled at me about strokes!"

Gaz thought about this for a second. This did not sound like Dib, and she was sure Tami was just being stupid again. With that, she promptly kicked the girl out of her room and locked the door.

0o0

Tami ended up by herself, in her little guestroom. She was too scared to go back to Dib, because he might just yell something else scary. And Gaz refuses to unlock the door. And Professor Membrane was out of the question on the account of him not being home.

She sighed. It was times like this she missed her sister the most. Going to Earth might have been a bad idea after all…