Chapter 3: Sharpened Pencils: Bidoof's Beginning
"OM NOM NOM." Said a joyful Bidoof, skipping merrily along the Forest path. "I wonder what I shall munch today? I hope today's not a bad day for chomping wood!" said the Bidoof happily. Bidoof was skipping when he found a gooey substance on the forest floor. "I wonder what this is!" he said joyfully. Little did he know that it was actually some of the Essence d'Articuno. He took a sniff and a taste of the substance and passed out. Suddenly, an ominous figure lurked from behind the K. Bidoof and took out a sharpened pencil. He was about to sharpen the hell out of that pencil. The sky was gray.
He then inserted the pencil and sharpened it like never before. The sharpener hissed as it sharpened the pencil. Yes…it was a magical sensation for a pencil to be sharpened like that. He wanted to go in further. Further! He moaned in ecstasy as he heard the noises of the sharpener. *SCREECH SCREECH SCREECH* it went. It felt like lubricated rape. He shoved the pencil all the way and tried to go even further. The sharpener couldn't handle it. The sharpener was about to break down at this rate. But he wouldn't release his pencil. Not just yet. He pushed it further, and further, and further, until the sharpener broke.
"Damn, my pencil sharpener broke." He tossed the pencil sharpener away into a nearby trash can. "Oh well." Afterwards, he dropped his pencil and proceeded to make some hot Bidoof love in an upward fashion and right into the slot sideways. Bidoof instantly woke up and felt the pain of a thousand moons. It screamed "BIDOOOOOOOF!" but no one could here him, because the sky was gray.
"Foolish Pikachu." Articuno's stepbrother thought maniacally as he was taking a hot steamy shower. "He does not realize that I am actually Articuno's stepmother, and not his stepbrother. MWAHAHAHAHAHA." She sang maniacally to herself.
"Hey smexy…" and then a rogue Bulbasaur came into the hot steamy shower.
After the final climax, the ominous figure took his sharpened pencil and left, leaving a fragile and helpless Bidoof lying in an awkward position on the road.
