Hey guys…I lack inspiration. SO…I'm just gonna sit for a few minutes, try to think of something…stare into space…hmm.

Oh! Here we go.

No, wait, more staring is needed….god DAMMIT I need a muse…badly…

Disclaimer: Nuh-uh. I no own Star Wars. Well, I own the DVDs…

Chapter 2: Back on Tatooine

Disguised as they were, and bringing with them one of Jabba's bounties, they were let into his palace without question. They were told to wait until Jabba was ready to see them, in a corner of the throne room.

"Did I mention how much I hate this place?" hissed Lila to Leia.

"Several times," murmured Leia. She watched Threepio sputter and complain as R2 played Luke's message, but her eyes constantly flickered to where Han was hanging on the wall n a block of carbonite. Lila gazed around the room.

"Dammit," Leia swore under her breath as Jabba refused the exchange of Han for the droids. They knew this was going to happen, that's why she and Lila and Lando were here, but it was still annoying to hear it.

"Artoo, look!" said Threepio. "Captain Solo. And he's still frozen in carbonite."

At this, both women had to fight very hard to resist the urge to make extremely rude hand gestures at the protocol droid and risk blowing their cover.

"Have I mentioned how much I hate that robot?" hissed Leia to Lila.

"Several times," murmured Lila, and was struck with a sudden sense of déjà vu.

Leia stepped forward and spoke in some obscure language Lila recognized as Ubese. Lila followed her, bringing Chewie. "I have come for the bounty on this Wookiee," Leia said.

Jabba laughed, sending chills down Lila's spine. "At last we have the mighty Chewbacca!" Threepio rushed forward to play translator.

"The illustrious Jabba bids you welcome and will gladly pay you the reward of 25,000."

Fighting back laughter, Lila said in Ubese, "50,000. No less." Jabba roared and knocked Threepio to the ground, shouting in Huttese.

"Uh…the mighty Jabba asks why he must pay 50,000."

Simultaneously, Leia and Lila held out a pair of small, silver balls. Because if you don't we'll blow you all to Kingdom Come, laughed Lila in her head.

"Because they're holding thermal detonators!" yelled Threepio.

There was a tense silence for a few moments as Jabba stared at the small bombs. Then he laughed and muttered something in Huttese, which roughly translated to 'these bounty hunters are my kind of scum, fearless and inventive.'

Threepio looked at them. "Jabba offers the sum of thirty-five. And I suggest you take it."

Leia waited for a moment, and then turned off the detonator. She stepped on Lila's foot, a hidden signal for turn it off NOW. Lila sighed and reluctantly turned it off. Leia spoke in Ubese.

"He agrees!" cried C-3PO. Whoopdie-doo, thought Lila. The beings in the room cheered and some of them played music. Leia and Lila leaned against the wall as Chewie was taken away. Leia looked around, bored, and Lila got into a staring match with Boba Fett, both fingering their blasters.

The staring contest lasted for ten minutes until Leia elbowed Lila and they left the throne room to await nightfall.

"I really, really can't wait till we leave," said Lila, once they were safely in the desert. "Although," she said cheerfully as an afterthought, "I did notice his tail still had the hole in it."

Leia rolled her eyes. "I still can't believe you did that."

"Mark my words," said Lila darkly, "something's going to go wrong, and with our luck it's going to go wrong pretty badly."

"Pessimist," muttered Leia under her breath.

"Heard that."

That night, Leia and Lila snuck into the now-dark throne room. "This smell is actually making me gag," whispered Lila.

"Yes. We've heard," Leia retorted. She quickly crossed the room to Han's prone figure while Lila eyed the wall uneasily. Something was not right.

Leia flipped a switch. The block of carbonite lowered to the floor. She pressed a series of buttons and flipped another switch.

The block began to hum. The black carbonite now began to glow red, heating up, until it began to melt away. Han fell to the floor.

"You think he's dead?" stage-whispered Lila. Leia gave her the finger. "Relax, I'm just kidding. No, he's alive." With that, Han opened his eyes and began coughing.

"My point exactly" was Lila's smug reply to this.

"I can't see," commented Han.

"You have hibernation sickness. Your eyesight will return in time," intoned Leia.

"Where am I?"

"Jabba's palace."

"And who are you?"

"Someone who loves you, and her friend." Leia removed her helmet. Behind her back Lila pretended to shove her finger down her throat and gagged. Then she looked around.

"Oh, shit! Leia, move, move, move! No, wait, too late."

An inane laugh was heard. Han sat up. "I know that laugh."

"Yeah, I bet you do," said Lila sarcastically.

The wall was then revealed to not be a real wall, and slid back to show Jabba and a bunch of other aliens.

"Oh shit."

"You said that already," muttered Leia irritably.

Well…it kind of sucked…but it's not my fault!

Draye: Uh…I don't know. I'm still undecided.

fictionfrek101: thanks! I'm really glad you liked it!

SwimAngel: yeah, it's kind of depressing.

Swpaintergal: well, I'm just evil that way, arent I?

So, my attempt to get more reviews failed miserably. No one reviewed over the summer. NO ONE. Look, people, I know you're reading this! 121 hits and only 4 reviews! If you're going to read it at all, please review…

I have to say, this is not one of my more popular stories.