Love Hina: BS to the Max

By: The Dark Icon Writers

Chapter Six: Rage in the streets

A/N: Yo everybody how's it been? Dimitri here just doing a quick hello before we start. This chapter was written by Kenji and myself after watching anime soo yea…

Disclaimer: Unless it was a graduation gift, none of us own Love Hina. Class of 05! May 21, 2005!

P.S: By the way… due to this chapter… we are SO banned…so email us for where it'll be up later lol


It was a normal day for one Keitaro Urashima as he walked down the streets of Hinata coming back from a shopping trip. He hummed to himself as he walked, his mind completely other places.

He didn't even realize what happened until he was in the middle of the dark alleyway. "Huh what's going on?" he asked himself as he looked around. He shrugged and then started to head back out the way that he had come but he was stopped by…

"Wait young man, don't you want to have some fun?"

Keitaro turned around to see the hooded old woman with a gypsy ball in front of her as she held it.

He walked back over to where she was sitting and then put his hands on the ball rubbing it. "So how may I help you?" he asked being the kind guy that he was.

"Actually Keitaro, I was wondering how I could help you." The old lady replied

"How do you know me?" he asked his eyes opening widely as the old woman stood up and started walking towards him.

"I know everything about you Keitaro Urashima… especially your fetish…"

She watched Keitaro back up

"For elf ears…"

Keitaro's legs started to twitch widely and rapidly as the old woman began to smile…

"Not the elf ears… not the ears… Oh GOD! THE EARS! They're so pointy and uuuuugghhh!"

Keitaro could only moan as the old woman removed her hood to revel to things…

A pair of elf ears… and….

"Grandma Hina, when did you get an ear job?" he asked looking down at his grandmother with sultry eyes

"When I found out that you liked e'm…" she said as she began to remove her top…

"Uggh… lets go grandma!" Keitaro said as he picked his grandma up and then slammed her on the table and split her legs.

"Do you by any chance have… them?" Keitaro asked with a deep sense of hope in his voice as his grandma lift her robe and then pulled out three things…

"Of course Keitaro-dearie… here they are right here…"

HAMTARO! LITTLE RODENTS BIG ADVENTURE!

Keitaro looked in wonder at the small hamhams that had found their way into his hands with small hearts in their eyes.

"You know what to do."

And with that Keitaro let the Hamhams go on another big adventure… they dug through the defiled caves of the woman and crawled all the way up until…

 Two hours, 3 dead ham hams, and one wet alleyway later

"Ooohh you're so good to me grandson… not even your parents could give it to me like that." Said Grandma Hina as she and Keitaro both enjoyed a cup of sake…

"Well that's cause I'm a hustler, you betta ask about me. AND I'm tippin on four 4's you know how it is." He said sporting his G-unit hoodie. "But yea anyways, I need to get home, you know… I gotta keep my residents happy."

"Yes I know sonny, tell Haruka that I still want some of her special sauce."

And with that Keitaro got up and left the allyway…

As Keitaro started walking down the streets once again he began to notice that things started looking… weird…

Kinda sexy like…

Especially that light pole…

You're pretty when I'm drunk…

Keitaro walked over to the light pole and then began rubbing it softly

"Come on baby, Oooohh your so nice and stiff"

He removed his pants and then looked at the light… he knew he heard it, the sounds of…

Plug it in… Plug it in!

"Mommy what is that man doing to that light pole it looks like fun!" a young mother turned to look over to where Keitaro was and blushed…

"Well honey, he's polishing his sword…"

"I have one of those… Do I need to polish it?" the young boy asked looking up to his mother.

"Why yes honey, you do need to polish it… and I have the cream right inside of me."

The boys eyes lit up wide as he smiled

"Yay! Let's go!" and with that the two rushed home to… "polish a blade"

Keitaro kept ravishing the light pole as the day began to fade away until…

"Sir what are you doing to my wife?"

"Huh?" Keitaro asked looking down to the mailbox

"Why are you screwing in my wife sir?" the mailbox asked

"Uhh well you see, I'm an electrician and she needed some screwing in…" Keitaro said pulling up his pants to hide his "wrench."

"Ahh! You're an electrician? Do you think you can help me out? I can't get my eye to function correctly, everything is black?" replied a nearby female robot…

"You need help with your eyes eh?" Keitaro said pulling his pants back down…

"Yes, if you could be so kind."

"Okay, well prepare yourself this wont hurt much… Ahhh…. Yes…" Keitaro moaned as he proceeded to "fix" her eye.

"OH GAWD!" he screamed…

"It's working! My screen just turned a little white!" the robot screamed

"Oh don't worry, by the end, you'll be completely done with the darkness…and you'll be seeing the creamy white"

End Chapter 6—


A/N: Another short one; aww well… we'll be back for more. I got a paper due on Monday and I got a senior thing tomorrow… so Cya.

And the elf ears thing comes from illwillpress (dot com)