Kirk tapped an idle rhythm against the armrest of the command chair. He shifted in his seat. Crossed and re-crossed his legs.
Bones watched his friend until he was ready to tear his own hair out.
"Jim," he whispered fervently, "you're jumpier than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rockin' chairs! What the hell's the matter with you?"
Releasing a long sigh, the captain leaned forward and stood.
"I'll be in my ready room with Dr. McCoy," he announced to bridge at large. "You have the con, Mr. Sulu."
The helmsman turned at his station and gave a short nod. "Aye, sir," he said.
Striding across the bridge, Bones practically on his heels, Starfleet's youngest starship captain in history entered his office.
.
Jim swung around the minute the door hissed shut behind them. Bones nearly barreled into him.
"Have you heard from them?" his friend asked.
Bones frowned. He knew exactly which "them" the captain was talking about.
"No," he said as evenly as he could manage.
Jim started pacing.
"Shit! I mean, I didn't expect to hear anything from Spock. He told me he'll basically go crazy, well what Vulcans consider crazy, anyway, for about a week or so, but I thought for Uhura would be in contact. It's been a week!"
The unbidden, unwanted, thought hit the older man before he could stop it. He shook his head to clear it. Uhura would have shot the hobgoblin up to his ears in tranquilizers before she'd let him injure her so bad she couldn't check in.
"Maybe they've been… busy, Jim," he offered instead of voicing the niggling concern.
For a moment, a lecherous grin lit the kid's face. "I get that part, Bones," he said. Just as quickly as it had lit up, his face darkened again. "But what if there's more going on?"
Not wanting to acknowledge his own fears about the situation, Bones went on the offensive.
"Well, if you're so damned worried, why don't you give her a call?"
This time, Jim's smile was full of the devil's mischief. "I think that's a job for the ship's chief surgeon, wouldn't you say, Bones?"
******
Six hours later, the Enterprise was docking at Starbase 16 to pick up supplies before their return trip to Sbelisdim. The visit would be quick, they hadn't used much of their stores over the eight months that had passed since the start of their fiver year mission, so Kirk gave a general order allowing crewmembers to leave the shift in two-hour shifts. He assigned himself and the rest of the senior staff to the final shift, noting that, if they had to leave early, it would look better if they were the ones to get screwed out of their leisure time.
By the time their turn came around, Bones had managed to a short conversation with Uhura via subspace where she assured him that she hadn't "killed him. Yet." so he was in a good enough mood to take Jim up on his offer for drinks and abbreviated bird hunting.
Neither officer was really ready for the surprise waiting for them on the base.
.
Ambassador Spock seemed pleased to see them, but kept glancing over their shoulders at the starbase's transporter pads.
Three or four minutes into Jim's obliviously incessant talking and Spock's unsubtle searching, Bones decided he'd had enough. Besides, he needed a drink. Sulu, Scotty, and even Chekov, had left also as soon as they'd materialized. He hated thinking of them beating him to the punch, so to speak.
"You lookin' for something, Ambassador?" he wanted to know.
The old version of Spock smiled. It wasn't the mere lip-twitch the younger elf had been known to let slip once in a while before the whole break-up thing had gone down. This was a full-on stretching of lips and crinkling of eyes. Bones wouldn't have believed it possible if he hadn't seen it with his own eyes.
"My apologies, Leonard," the half-Vulcan said. "You, know doubt, have an appointment with the fine bourbon available at Lounge 16."
Bones shook his head. It was still creepy thinking that this virtual stranger knew so much about his proclivities.
"When I heard that the senior staff would be arriving in the final leave shift, I decided to meet your party. I had hoped, however, that Spock and Lt. Uhura would be joining you," he tilted his head and flashed a suggestive look that could give one of Jim's a run for the money. "Sometimes I forget that young lovers often take advantage of such free time to be alone."
When Jim's eyes met Bones's, they were filled with panicked dismay.
"Oh shit," said the doctor.
.
Only someone who knew him well would be able to tell, but Ambassador Spock was, well, pissed was the only word for it. Thanks to the meld on Delta Vega, Jim knew him very well.
"I don't understand," the Vulcan said, proving that he was also confused by the information the captain and the doctor had just shared with him. "Why would he do such an idiotic thing?"
Bones took a swallow of his bourbon and glared at Spock.
"Why do you think he did it?" he asked belligerently. "The pointy-eared bastard soaked up all your stories about all the fun we all supposedly had saving the universe and all, noticed Ms. Uhura didn't feature in any of the tales and decided her taggin' along would spoil all the… the, uh, fun!"
Jim grimaced and exhaled a long sigh. "I think I'd better take it from here, Bones," he said.
.
Ambassador Spock's lips thinned into a grim line. He didn't try to curb the annoyance he felt towards his younger or the anger directed at himself. Both had made poor choices which had resulted in pain for the last woman in the universe either should want to hurt. Still, what the young man sitting across the small table had asked of him was not wise.
"Jim," he said, not quite sighing, "have I not done enough damage? We have already seen one negative result of my interference."
"No offense intended, Spock," Jim said, grasping the edges of the table and leaning forward until his face was inches away from the old Vulcan's, "but don't you think you should take on a little responsibility for fixing this mess you admittedly helped make? Maybe he made a dumbass decision, but he did it because of the possible future you told us about. And, if things have gone south between them, I don't want to lose the best communications officer over it. Besides, I really can't see how you could possibly make things any worse than they already were."
The elderly half-Vulcan raised a skeptical brow, but seemed to consider Jim's words. He was silent for a long time.
"I must admit a certain conceit led me to believe that Spock would be too intelligent not realize that one close relationship would not preclude the development of another," he said finally. "However, I did not account for the confusion and vulnerability I experienced when I was his age, nor did I consider the possibility that the events of his own altered upbringing might do anything other than better prepare him for engaging in such relationships. I was, to some extent, negligent. I assumed, rather illogically I see now, that his relationship with Lt. Uhura was a sign that he 'recognized a good thing' far earlier than I did."
Dumbstruck, Jim stared at his friend.
"You mean, you and Uhura…?"
The ambassador shook his head.
"No, Jim," he sad, rather sadly for a Vulcan. "By the time I realized my Nyota's value, she was no longer interested in pursuing anything more than friendship with me."
"Huh." Jim breathed, for want of anything else to say.
Spock's voice was grave when he spoke again. "I have no pressing obligations over the next two weeks," he said. "Perhaps, if they have not resolved their differences during their stay on Sbelisdim, I should speak with my younger self and find out exactly what he was thinking."
******
Nyota tugged at her uniform tunic to straightened. She smoothed down the black trousers she'd opted to wear for the first mine inspection, then turned to him, a mask of professionalism on her face.
"Are you ready to depart," she asked, picking up a large shoulder bag and shoving a few PADDs inside.
"I must offer you an apology," Spock said quietly. "It was never my intention for you to be harmed in any way by this. I see now that I should have followed the advice of both the captain and the doctor, and chosen another to fulfill the need."
"This isn't about the about the Pon farr! Do you get that?" Her eyes blazed with her anger. "It's what you did after that's so difficult. That's the part that was unforgivable.
"God, Spock! I was willing to do whatever was needed to save your life, but what happened on the beach wasn't a part of that, was it? Are you sorry about that, Commander?"
Spock mentally winced at the use of his title.
"I am sorry that my actions caused you anguish," he clarified. "What transpired on the beach was not entirely due to my Time, but neither was it unaffected by it. As I have already stated, it was instigated by my continued desire for you; it was brought to fruition because I am not yet entirely free of the Pon farr."
Her shoulders slumped as she sighed and turned away from him.
"I was willing, Spock," she repeated woodenly. "I would have done almost anything if it meant keeping you alive. But what you did — loving me, and then saying that it didn't matter at all — it's breaking my heart. Even worse than when you left."
Had he been human, Spock suspected, he would have been compelled to pull her into his arms and promise to change, whether or not he truly intended to do so. Had he been fully Vulcan, he would have been repulsed by her display of emotion and would have needed to turn away from her. As a hybrid he was neither, so he watched, unmoving, as she wrapped her arms around herself.
.
"I always thought," she said, spinning to face him again, "that you chose to live as a Vulcan because that is the way you were raised, and because that was the choice that was made for you. But you really can't understand what it's like for us, can you? In spite of your heritage, humanity is as alien to you as Vulcanity is for a human."
His steady gaze faltered as she reached out a hand as if to touch his face, and she quickly recalled herself. Shaking her head, she clutched at her upper arm once more. She looked down at their feet, so close together.
"I never expected you to learn to be human," she whispered, "but I thought that you would always endeavor to understand and respect our differences."
She didn't see the myriad of emotions that flickered across his face following her speech. She didn't know that, while he had not understood his effect on her, he felt her pain as deeply as she did.
"At one time," he said just as quietly as she had spoken, "I believed I did understand, Nyota. And you have always had my respect. It seems, however, that the one, without the full complement of the other, was not enough."
She didn't know what to say to that, so she said nothing.
After a full minute of silence had passed, she heard him walk away.
**********
Author's Note: Well, this story is winding down, folks. There are just two more chapters after this one. Thanks for letting me know more were needed!
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek or any of its characters or concepts.
