Wow thanks for all the feedback guys (: I wasn't expecting it!! And I was seriously considering deleting this because after I read the first chapter, I hated it. But because of you all, I'll continue!
Claire,
So remember last summer when we were all hanging out at Massie's? And she had asked us who we all liked and shit? I lied when I answered. Obviously, I told it was Leesh 'cause she's my girlfriend and would clearly be pissed if I'd told the truth, and 'cause I do like Alicia.
Just not as much as you.
Yeah I feel like a total douche since you're dating (and practically engaged to) Josh, but I can't hide how I feel about you.
Did you know I remember everything about last summer, when Alicia was in Spain and Josh was in Manhattan at the internship? We spent every day together, and I couldn't have loved it more.
We'd spend the days doing the coolest things –going to the zoo, eating ice cream while floating around in your pool, dangling my sister's Barbie dolls and your brother's autographed Tony Hawk shoes off the roof of that old house.
And then at night, we would just lie in my backyard, watching the stars, drinking hot chocolate, telling secrets. I told you stuff I hadn't told anyone else. You told me stuff that your girlfriends couldn't be trusted with.
On the fifth of August, I had decided I was going to tell you how I felt about you. But then when you didn't show up at Starbucks the next morning for our usual Double Chocolate-y Chip frappucinos, I knew that Josh must have come back.
And sure enough, in my inbox, Josh had said 'hey dude i'm back in town –meet up at Cam's for beers 2nite'
And I knew our summer of secrets, of friendship, was over. Once September first rolled around, it would be just a memory.
I was right. We don't talk now, save for the once-a-week 'hey how R U?' text. I think you've noticed I never reply. I want to, but I can't. I'd end up saying something about how I'm not okay, because the girl I'm in love with is banging my best friend.
I know my letter isn't very anonymous, but I don't care, Claire. I want you to know that I really like you. Stay with Josh, though. I'll stay together with Alicia. That's how things are supposed to be. I know you and Josh will make great parents one day.
I'll get over you eventually, but it will be hard. We're never going to be together, our fates just aren't intertwined.
I love you.
