January marked the beginning of a new year, the resumption of Quidditch matches and, most, importantly, the month when Rose turns fifteen.
Ever since she attended the little Christmas party the Malfoys had the previous month, she never was the same. She felt weird inside, like something has changed. She noticed that every time she passes by a mirror, she tends to stop to look if something about her was out of place; she hated it.
Whenever she noticed Scorpius' slim figure, she pushed away the plate of food she had in front of her; she hated that too. She also remembered the five rules Curtis gave her; she took note of that whenever she could. It was a foreign feeling for her to care about what others thought of her. For once, she thought about being 'delicate', a word that never even crossed her mind before. She hated it all.
Scorpius's face kept running through her thoughts that it distracted her. Whenever she thought about him, she decided to kick or hit something within the vicinity. It didn't go well for her.
One rainy Tuesday, when the Gryffindor Quidditch team was training for their game against Slytherin, Rose was thoroughly distracted.
"Slytherin," she thought silently. "We're playing against Slytherin! We have to nail this game, otherwise—"
Rose's face turned tomato red at the thought of Scorpius.
"But what would he think of it?" she contradicted. "He's not even a good Quidditch player."
"Heads up, Weasley!" Curtis called out to her when she took a bludger right on the face. Rose got knocked out of her broom easily because of not eating right for days, but was caught by James just before she hit the ground after falling thirty feet.
"Are you mad, Rose!?" James screamed through the pouring rain. "Didn't you see the bludger? The sky's still bright enough for you to see, isn't it? Or have you just gone totally blind!?"
"Well, sorry if I inconvenienced you, Captain!" she replied sourly as she wiped the blood that poured from her nose on her sleeve.
"Rose, you should go to Madame Pam, now. That's an awful-looking nosebleed." Curtis interrupted.
"I think she looks fine." James bellowed spitefully.
"James!" Curtis cried out disbelievingly at her boyfriend. "I'll go with you Rose, come."
"Forget it," Rose stood up and brushed away the mud from her bum. "I'll go by myself. I wouldn't want to be an even bigger burden to the team."
Rose stomped away angrily as Curtis gave James an angry look.
"You should be ashamed of yourself, James!" Curtis started, picking up her broom. "Be more sensitive to your cousin! She's a girl too, you know."
"No, I didn't know." James replied before flying back up in the air.
Rose walked towards the castle like an ogre. She liked the feeling of anger. It made her feel like herself again; she stomped heavily on the ground, not caring about the blood dripping from her nose, her sopping wet hair or her clothes being entirely covered with mud. No, it was Rose, the Quidditch queen, the all-powerful macho tomboy who played Marcus in the winter play; the super-human beater who pummeled her way through every match. Yes, that was her. She wasn't some wallflower whom everyone admires because of her beauty and grace. She wasn't a porcelain doll who wore fabulous, frilly dresses and had big, bouncy curls. She was Rosaline Weasley; clever, tough and always in control.
Suddenly, Scorpius popped out from a corridor reading a hard-bound book. Rose froze over on her spot. At the sight of Rose, Scorpius dropped his book and took out his handkerchief.
"Rose!" he exclaimed. "What happened? Are you alright?"
"I-" Rose was on the brink of crying because of Scorpius's concern when she reminded herself of her resolve. "I was just going to Madame Pam; bludger hit me on the face."
Rose took his white handkerchief, but his face was still screwed up in horror. Scorpius accompanied her to the infirmary to see Madame Pam, she was mildly surprised at Rose's face.
"Got hit by your own instruments I see." She said in an amused voice. "Never thought I'd see that day you get hit by a bludger."
"That's the both of us." Rose replied. She saw her face in the mirror beside her bed and realized why Scorpius was so appalled upon seeing her; her face was paper white because of all the blood he lost, her nose was broken in several places and her left eye was starting to swell.
"Here we are," Madame Pam wiped the blood on her face with a hot towel and drew out her wand. "Episkey."
With that, Rose's nose returned to its normal state.
"Take this," Madame Pam gave her a small vial with amber liquid inside. "It's going to help lessen the pain from that head trauma."
"Thanks."
"Now, you better change your clothes and get some rest." Madame Pam strode to her office to get a nightgown for Rose.
"Let me get that for you." Scorpius tapped her clothes with his wand and they instantaneously dried up for her.
"I never knew you could cast non-verbal spells." Rose said jealously.
"One of the many things you don't know about me." Scorpius bid her goodnight and went on to have dinner. Rose hated herself for feeling the sinking sensation in her stomach when he went away.
"Um, Rose, what did you do with your hair?" Al asked his cousin one morning.
"Isn't it obvious? I cut it." Rose replied matter-of-factly as she sat down the table and grabbed some toasted bread.
"Okay, I guess the more appropriate question would be 'Why did you cut it'" Al looked uncomfortable asking the question.
"Because," Rose thought of the excuse for her hair the whole night. "It gets in my eyes when I play Quidditch, blinding me from seeing incoming bludgers, and trust me, we don't want that in this Saturday's match against Slytherin.
"But," Al boldly continued. "You never failed to see a bludger even with your old hair. You just kept it in a tight bun."
"Well, it's growing too long for me to handle." Rose stuffed her mouth with some sausages. The truth was, she cut her hair to make her feel less girly and sensitive. She almost cried the other night when Scorpius saw her all bloody and spangled. It would've been the first time she ever cried in ten years if she didn't suppress her tears. No, she was not going to take a chance. She's got to toughen herself up until this phase of weakness is over.
From across the room, Rose didn't dare peek at Scorpius' face. Her hair was so short that it barely touched the back of her neck; it made her feel liberated. It was an awfully nice feeling; it got rid of her self-consciousness for a while.
"Is there something you want to talk about, Rose?"
Rose cried into her pillow one Saturday evening, still in her Quidditch gear. They had lost the match against Slytherin. Although James told her through gritted teeth that it wasn't her fault, she knew it was. She kept missing the bludger when she aimed to hit it, which made her look like a monkey swinging a bat on a broomstick. She failed to fend off the bludgers that flew towards the chasers, causing the opponent to score 130 points ahead of them. She even accidentally hit James with her bat when she missed a bludger. In the end, Gryffindor got the snitch but Slytherin won by twenty points more than them.
Curtis entered her dormitory room and sat on her bed; she already changed into her casual clothes.
"Look, it wasn't your-"
"Don't give me that dung, Curtis because I know that it was my bloody fault why we lost!" Rose retorted through sobs. "I'm not as stupid as you think I am, okay?"
"Stop blaming yourself, Rose. We are a team and if we lose or win, it's not the fault of a single person."
"I used to love Quidditch more than anything in the world! Now, I can't think straight and I keep making mistakes! I am so confused. What is bloody wrong with me, Curtis?" Rose sat up and looked her straight on the face with her teary eyes.
"Used to?" Curtis shot her a furtive glance. She smiled at her meaningfully. "Rose, all these things you're feeling right now are just normal. There's nothing wrong with them. We all go through them as we get older. Maybe you should stop rejecting your own feelings and start facing them. I know what you're trying to do; you want to stay a kid forever, but you can't. You're turning fifteen next week; you better start acting like an adult and get rid of all this wishy-washy nonsense."
"What do you mean?" Rose wiped her eyes on her sleeves. "How am I supposed to do that?"
"The only way you're going to get rid of these feelings is if you're going to embrace them until you're used to them. I know how I felt when I had my first crush"
"What?" Rose blushed profusely. "Who said anything about crushes?"
"Oh, Rose." Curtis gave her a pat on the back. "You're not a child anymore, time to grow up."
Curtis left Rose on her bed, baffled by the sudden surge of realizations and confusing feelings attacking her all at the same time. How she hated puberty.
Dear Aunt Ginny,
I know it's quite embarrassing for me to write to you about this but I didn't know who else to turn to. You're the only person I know who can help me on this and at the same time won't blab to dad. For the past few weeks, I've been feeling funny about this person and about myself. I've been so distracted and conscious about what I looked like. Just last week I got hit by a bludger during Quidditch practice. Imagine, I actually got hit by an actual bludger! The reason for that miracle was because I constantly thought of that person while I was on the broom. Also, I sheared my hair so short because I thought it would gain me back my sanity and not care so much about what he thought of me, but I was wrong. Gryffindor lost the Quidditch match against Slytherin last Saturday because of me, more importantly because I kept looking at that person on the stands. I feel so stupid. I have never felt more stupid in my entire life! What should I do Aunt Ginny? This person, I used to hate him then we became friends and now this! I'm going mad! I never used to feel this way! What should I do? Please tell me right away.
P.S. In case this owl might get intercepted, I will no longer sign this letter for you already know who I am.
January flew by so fast and was swept away by February. Rose loathed that month during that particular year. She felt like everything around her was teasing or mocking her. The tables at the Great Hall were decorated by nosegays of red roses and pink ribbons. Everywhere she looked there were couples exchanging Valentines' cards or chocolates in heart-shaped boxes.
"A rose for a lovely Rose?" Barney McLaggen was particularly on top of her hate list that month. He kept sending her roses, probably thinking that it amused Rose to be given flowers of the same name.
"Bite me, McLaggen." She answered dully during the thirteenth of February.
"But, it's the night before Valentine's Day; you should at least accept it." Barney grinned widely. Rose rolled her eyes.
"Yes, but you're forgetting, it's also Friday the 13th," Rose took a bite from a turkey leg. "Which means it's not your lucky day."
Rose smiled to herself at the apparent coincidence. Al and Lily laughed at her side. Rose peered at the other side of the Great Hall where Scorpius and his Slytherin friends were all laughing at their own private joke. She saw the small pile of chocolates on Scorpius' side given to him by his own admirers. She felt irate and stuffed her mouth with more turkey.
She slid her hand into her pocket where her Aunt Ginny's reply letter was, the one which she already memorized because of reading it too much.
Dear Rose,
I'm honored that you have entrusted me with this confession of yours because it only shows how much you trust me. I experienced the same thing when I was young, even younger than you actually. When I first saw the famous Harry Potter, I felt like my heart was going to explode. I was ten years old then. I had a humongous crush on him which continued to grow every time I saw him. I couldn't even speak to him until your mother advised me to get on with my life and act normally. I followed her advice and dated a few other guys. During fifth year, we got together. I could almost have kissed your mother, then. You see this person you're talking about? You fancy him so bad that you're lovesick over him. I felt the same with your Uncle Harry but the only difference is you're trying to convince yourself that you're not. Don't. If you like him so bad, tell him so. I even had to wait for Harry to notice me but you, you don't have to. I'm sure Scorpius Malfoy fancies you too. Just make sure you don't mention that to your father yet; he'll go berserk.
With Love,
Aunt Ginny
Confess to Scorpius? It made her stomach do back flips and somersaults. It made her feel so nauseous that her face almost turned green.
"Are you feeling alright Rose?" Al inquired upon seeing the change in Rose's color. "You look funny."
"Yeh look like your father when he was gonna throw up some slugs back in the day."
"Hagrid!" Lily squealed. "When did you come back?"
"Jus' yesterday," Hagrid beamed at the children; they reminded him so much of Harry, Ron and Hermione. "Meant'a give summat to yeh, Rosie. Fer yer bir'day, yeh know."
"For me?" Hagrid handed her a small parcel with a pink bow. Opened the box and a beautiful locket met her eyes. "Wow, thanks Hagrid!"
She opened the locket and a scene from her childhood came out. It was when she was just three years old, learning how to ride a broom.
"You can view your own memories in it, Rosie." Hagrid explained.
"Wicked! You don't need a pensieve anymore." Al remarked.
"No' quite. Only mem'ries of the one who holds it ca' be seen." Hagrid replied. "I go' 'em trinkets fro' France. They go' a whole bunch'o those there."
"This is so awesome, Hagrid, thank you!" Rose smiled joyfully.
"Don' mention it. 'least I could do fer missin' yer bir'day."
Rose couldn't sleep. She kept looking at her memories in the locket Hagrid gave her. She didn't know if it was intentional or not but she always saw the memories she had with Scorpius.
She got up from her bed and put on a coat over her nightgown. She wanted to go down to the kitchen and get a cup of something. James had shown her and Al how to get it the kitchen during their third year.
"Lumos." Her wand lit up to guide her through her excursion. Upon opening the portrait door, she was greeted by a low 'Ow!'
"That hurt!" cried the voice from outside.
"Scorpius? Is that you?" Rose inquired, recognizing the voice.
"Yes." He replied as he rubbed his throbbing forehead.
"What are you doing here?"
"I had something to give you, but I only just remembered that I didn't know how to get inside."
"Well, that's silly of you." Rose stepped out of the portrait hole, noting how cold the floor was without her slippers. "Couldn't it have waited until morning?"
"No, I-" Scorpius grabbed a velvet box from inside his robes. "Here, I-I didn't know it was your birthday."
"It was actually two weeks ago." Rose took the box.
"Sorry, then." Scorpius looked like he wanted to punch himself.
Rose opened the box and found a circular foggy orb. Beside it was a small key attached to a necklace.
"What's this?" Rose asked curiously. Scorpius told her to insert the key into the small hole on the orb and wind it up.
Suddenly, it started to play a sweet but slow melancholic tune. It enticed Rose so much that she forgot how cold her feet were and felt warmth crawl into her heart.
"Come, there's still more to that!" Scorpius grabbed her hand and brought her to the astronomy tower where the moon shone brightly.
"Scorpius, what are we doing here?" Rose demanded.
"Raise the orb to the moonlight." Rose looked hesitant but she did as she was told and she gasped at what she saw.
"Mermaids!" she cried out in astonishment. "I never saw real mermaids before."
"Those are the mermaids in the lake."
"In Hogwarts' lake?" Rose asked with widened eyes. "They're so charming."
Scorpius sighed with relief and gazed out at the moon.
"I'm glad you liked it." Scorpius smiled. "You never told me it was your birthday. I was shocked when I found out this morning."
"Then how did you get this gift on such short notice?"
"I meant it to be a Valentine's gift. I'll just get you another one." Scorpius stroked Rose's crop with an amused expression. "I love what you've done with your hair by the way."
"You're joking, right?"
"No, as a matter-of-fact, I'm not." Scorpius laughed out heartily. Rose smiled at him; she liked the sound of his laugh.
"Scorpius," this was it, Rose thought nervously. "I think I-."
"I know." Scorpius smirked as he said that.
"Really?" Rose was taken aback.
"But I happen to know that I love everything about you, Rose. Absolutely everything."
"That's," Rose looked at her watch, it was exactly twelve midnight. "That's nice."
"Rose," Scorpius kissed her hand, a notion she was all too familiar with. "Happy Valentine's day"
