I know, I know, it's been a while. I apologize deeply. But school is wearing me out. The next chapter (which will be the final chapter/epilogue) will be up MUCH sooner. And it's MUCH longer. So smile in anticipation for that! This chapter begins directly where the last chapter ended. Enjoyyy!
Death and Agony
Within minutes of Hagrid's departure with Harry, Sirius heard a sharp pop behind him, and Remus ran towards him. Sirius, assuming the man would be jumping into his arms, smiled at his arrival. Much to his surprise, Remus' fist came into hard contact with Sirius' jaw.
"HOW COULD YOU DO THIS, SIRIUS!" Remus bellowed, anger clearly visible in every line on his face. "HOW COULD YOU GIVE YOUR OLDEST FRIENDS TO VOLDEMORT!" He punched his lover again, a resounding crack echoing around the deserted village. "JAMES AND LILY, SIRIUS! HOW COULD YOU!" In the time it took Remus to get far enough away from Hogsmeade to apparate, his rational mind had sorted out the facts of what he knew and what Dumbledore had said. There was no doubt in his mind when he appeared in Godric's Hollow that Sirius was the traitor.
Sirius was dumbstruck. He had not thought for one single second that Remus would believe him to be the traitor. "I didn't, Rem," he answered quietly, stepping away from the fuming werewolf, his hand clutching his throbbing jaw. "I swear to you, I didn't."
"DON'T LIE TO ME, SIRIUS!" Remus was furious. He was angrier than he could ever remember being in his life. The fury was blinding and numbing. It made his head hurt, but there was no room for him to feel anything else. He was vaguely aware of the fact that he had his wand pointed menacingly at Sirius' throat. "I should kill you now."
Sirius put his hands up in defeat. "Put it away, Remus," he said calmly. "You know I didn't do this."
Remus did not put his wand away. He stared at Sirius as though his were the vilest thing on the planet. "How long?" He asked, his voice spitting venom.
"How long, what, Rem?"
"HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN ON HIS SIDE?!" Remus exploded, stepping towards the man he had loved so much, the man he hated to admit he still loved now. "AND TO ACCUSE ME! When it has been you all along! How dare you, Sirius Black!"
Sirius' voice was desperate. "Please, Remus," he begged, "You know me! You know how much I loved James!" His eyes were shining with tears he refused to let fall. "I would have died before I gave them up!"
Remus stood silently fuming for several seconds with his wand tip pressed hard into Sirius' throat. He knew he would never be able to bring himself to do what he knew he should rightfully do. Instead, he chose the coward's way out. "Fuck you, Sirius Black," he spat, barely audible before he twisted away into the darkness once more.
Sirius knew many things Remus did not at that moment. He knew that he was innocent. He knew he should have told Remus of his idea to switch James' Secret-Keeper. He knew, on some level, Remus still loved him. He knew Remus did not truly believe that he did this, though it may be a very long time before the werewolf allowed himself to see this truth. But most importantly, Sirius knew this would be the last time he and Remus would see each other for a very long time, if they ever saw each other again. This thought served only to fuel his anger further.
He drew his wand as he twisted through time and space violently, an echoing scream of "Pettigrew!" resounding around Godric's Hollow after his departure.
Sirius knew very well that Peter would not be at his home. The man, though he was not talented or intelligent, was well aware of the fact that Sirius would be after him as soon as he realized what happened to Lily and James. He would be running scared. With his master destroyed, as he so obviously was, for Harry still lived, Peter had no one to hide behind.
When apparating, Sirius envisioned the plump, traitorous man instead of a destination. He focused all of his thought and energy on Peter Pettigrew. When he opened his eyes, he was standing in the middle of a street, no different from any other street in the country. It was after dawn now. He could see people in their cars driving to work. He could see people walking up and down either side of the street, some with dogs, some in jogging outfits. He was not sure why he had ended up here. He did not see Peter anywhere. Though, he had to consider the fact that Pettigrew was an animagus. His stinking rat-self could be anywhere.
And then he heard him.
"How could you, Sirius!" came the squeaking voice of Peter Pettigrew. "Lily and James, Sirius!"
The sound of those names on his tongue ignited a horrible fire inside the stronger man. He turned to see Peter facing him, just feet away. The man even had the courage to put a sneer on his face. Sirius raised his wand quickly. "You vile rat!" he screamed, throwing his wand arm upwards as he prepared to murder the sad excuse for a man before him.
But he was not fast enough. One second's hesitation had ruined it all. It happened so quickly, Sirius nearly missed the movement. Peter had succeeded in obliterating the entire street behind them, leaving bodies of early-rising muggles strewn everywhere. Sirius knew he was still here. He ran frantically into the chaos, having no idea where Pettigrew had scampered off to in the confusion of the explosion.
It was then that he noticed the small pile of bloody clothing in the spot where Peter had accused him wrongfully of the horrible things he himself was truly responsible for. He had to admit, it was a clever plan. The stupid man had even sliced off one of his fingers before transfiguring into a rat, just to make it all that much more believable. Sirius could not stop the bubble of maniacal laughter from escaping his throat as his mind spun out of control with the weight of the situation he was in. He had been out-bested by Peter Pettigrew, and there was absolutely no way he would be getting out of taking the fall for the Potters' murders now. Not with everyone from the screaming muggles around him to Albus Dumbledore believing him to be responsible. And now, on top of it all, he would have to take the blame for the mass murder and destruction before him as well.
The ministry was there within minutes. Sirius could not stop the laughter from frothing out of his mouth as they carried him away, to a cell in Azkaban where he would reside for twelve long and hard years. At the moment they dragged him away from the destruction he had not caused, his mind flashed to Remus. Where was he? Would he ever believe Sirius to be innocent? Or would the years apart permanently force Remus against him? And poor Harry. What kind of life would he live? Sirius knew he and Remus could have given the boy a wonderful home. It was all so unfair for the child who was at the center of it all.
***
Remus had apparated back to his flat. It was his now. He knew that Sirius would not be coming home ever again. The thought gouged into his heart like dragon claws. He felt like he had when Sirius had left him several weeks ago. It felt like he had been living in a different world not even twelve hours ago. He and Sirius had made love on the very couch in front of him. They had had only a few moments of blissful happiness before their world was blown to smithereens. It was hard for Remus to look at anything in this place. He knew he would have to move out immediately. Maybe, Dumbledore could help him out one last time and provide him with a place to stay. He knew it was unfair of him to ask the old wizard for any more help, but this place had been paid for with a small portion of Sirius' fortune. That was no longer available to Remus. He had no way of affording this apartment on his own. Even if he had, he would move out as soon as possible. He couldn't bear the memories.
He sunk into his bed, his mind spinning a million miles a second. It was all so surreal. Lily and James dead. And it was Sirius' fault. It just didn't make sense. But nothing else did either. If it was what Dumbledore believed, Remus knew he was better off just accepting it as truth. Dumbledore knew who the Potters' Secret-Keeper was. Sirius had told him himself that he was James' Secret-Keeper. He had said it right to Remus' face. There was no denying that fact. And yet, Remus' mind fought tirelessly to deny it. The man he loved could not have done this. The man he loved would have never betrayed James Potter. They were brothers. Brothers didn't betray each other like this.
Remus' last thought before falling into a fitful, restless sleep was that the man he loved no longer existed.
He did not remove himself from bed for nearly two days. It was not until a snow white owl tapped relentlessly at his window, that he finally found the strength to get up. The owl dropped a Daily Prophet on his nightstand before streaking back off into the night. It did not even wait for payment. Remus grasped the paper and headed back for his bed. He had not showered or eaten in days. His stomach grumbled in agitation, but the werewolf ignored it.
When he glanced as the cover of the paper, his stomach grumbled for an entirely different reason. On the front page was Sirius' face laughing like he had gone insane. In the back of his mind, Remus didn't see that as being far from the truth. The article title read "Sirius Black: Murderer of 12 Muggles and Wizard Pettigrew". Underneath Sirius' picture was another smaller picture of a street with a massive crater in it, with a small caption beneath it. 'Black blows apart street, killing 12 muggles when confronted by Peter Pettigrew. Aforementioned was also slain in the explosion.'
Remus felt bile rise in his throat. He leaned over his bed and dry-retched violently onto the hardwood floorboards. He could not believe what this man had done. A man he had shared a bed with for years and years. A man he thought he knew was capable of mass murder? He didn't want to believe it, but it was staring him right in the face. The werewolf could not bear to read the article. He tossed the paper into the puddle of sick on the floor beside his bed, before lying back against the pillows and willing himself back into the blissful oblivion of sleep.
Thanks to everyone who is reading and my one wonderful reader who is reviewing. =] Epilogue coming up soon!!
