Ad Ultimum
Chapter II


"Usagi-chan is a nice child, isn't she? She takes after her mother in a lot of ways, but seems to have developed a stronger sense of responsibility at an earlier age. Neo-Queen Serenity didn't start taking her duties seriously until adulthood" The Princess of Mercury handed Hotaru a new bag of ice and instructed her to keep it on her arm. She looked over the injury at her foot and smiled in relief. "Ice should help against the swelling, and we should bandage it to prevent it from moving too much, but you're fortunate that it's quite minor." She watched the girl flinch when she applied the coldness against her skin. "I want you to rest today and tomorrow you should be back to your usual self. Is that all right, Hotaru-chan?"

The fourteen-year-old kept her silence, answering only with her stubborn refusal to look directly at the older woman. She removed the ice pack from her arm and closed her eyes, fighting the wave of dizziness that always came whenever she used her powers. The nausea was exactly the reason why she didn't use them earlier to heal herself—the injuries were far too minor anyways—but she went and threw all that out the window just now. It wasn't as if that cut required immediate attention either so what was she thinking? The Princess could have done with or without it; she wasn't that weak of an individual and Hotaru knew it. The sight of blood, though, staining the purity of the young Princess was unbearable. She couldn't stop her hand from reaching out, couldn't stop the transfer of her powers into her body.

'This is silly,' Hotaru mused. 'It's unlike me to be dwelling on such trivial matters.'She noticed that Ami had left her side and remarked to herself that they have indeed adjusted to her mannerisms. The physical differences from their last meeting were there—perhaps she looked a slight more fatigued than precious—but the blue-haired monarch remained a sight to behold. They were all at least twenty years older than she, yet they seemed reluctant to let their youth take flight, held upon it stubbornly as if to mock time itself. Matters of politics aside, Hotaru still found it difficult to engage with them in discussion, and Ami seemed to understand that. The air, however, was tense and clung to the side of business; it was clear that Mercury had something she wanted—needed to tell her.

"I shall remain where I am for tonight," she finally answered.

Ami took it as a sign to continue, the hints of a smile lifting her lips, and she seated herself again by the bed. "I'm surprised you're here; you weren't this morning."

"We had to take a detour when we found a bridge destroyed, and we had mechanical troubles along the way," explained Hotaru, not bothering to lower her voice in the empty room. "The faulty carriage was responsible for itself, but the bridge had been standing the day before. I questioned the villagers there and they claimed that it had just collapsed all of a sudden. No one had any idea why."

"Where was this? Did news get out of your departure?"

"Not that I know of. Considering that it was on the outskirts of Jupiter, the story about the bridge simply collapsing isn't too far fetched. The area has a history of rock slides and earthquakes though, so it would probably not be worth the effort to delve too deeply into it."

"Still..." Mercury trailed off, leaving her hand against her chin and her brows knitted in thought. "But if you don't think we should pursue it, we won't."

Hotaru nodded and relaxed. Talking like this was easy, keeping everything factual and in a realm distinct from the one she occupied. It was the way she'd been taught, the way to which she was forced to adjust after her father saddled her with a good portion of the country's affairs. Over the years, his workload had increased steadily and it eventually got to the point where the country was suffering from his inability to keep up. When the other territorial heads started pestering him about Saturn's declining economy, he refused to cooperate with them any further and, in his brilliance, had his daughter placed at the reins of international relations. Things started looking up when he continued to pile duties on top of her, but this left her with a soured childhood. Straying far into personal matters was undesirable on the political field, and therefore even more useless in the real world. A rational mind, she learned quickly, was critical to one's survival.

She finally noticed that the silence had hovered unbroken for a while. Hotaru had been waiting for Mercury to continue, but a quick glance revealed the woman deep in thought; it was obvious that her expectations would not be met. "Is that all you had to say? What about the meeting?" she pressed. "You mentioned to the Princess that it had gone well."

Ami looked up, surprised by the sudden intrusion. "That's true, but you understand that I am not particularly obliged to distress the Small Lady. I only said that because I didn't want her to worry. Minako-chan commented on something regarding that incident a few months ago, and Haruka-san didn't take it very well. Rei-chan remarked on the role of the Ginzuishou in society, but Setsuna-san spoke out against its proposed destruction. Every point that was brought up resulted in five more countering it; I believe we would have continued to argue if not for the Neo-King's intervention." She shook her head in resignation. "We ended the day with trade and left our main issue unresolved."

Hotaru sighed. Her age and relative lack of experience prevented her from contributing too much to the discussions anyway, but it was always nice that the other monarchs kept her informed. She bowed her head. "Thank you, Mercury. I shall remember to return with news of this to my father."

"Hotaru-chan, look at me for a moment." She did and was uncomfortable with the eyes she met, radiating they were with a kind of friendliness with which she did not wish to make acquaintance. Mercury's princess smiled in spite of this. "I'm glad that you're willing to talk to me, but every time you address me that way makes me feel a little distant from you. I won't go as far as to say that we're friends, but I want you to know that we're here for you. We'll always be ready to lend an ear so if you have anything you want to say..."

The pools of amethyst continued to stare, as if they were capable of judging the older woman's sincerity through a look alone. She did not intimidate her, but what could she do? What could any of them do? It was a thing of the past, something neither Neo-Queen Serenity nor the almighty Ginzuishou could touch. If she told them, all they would give her were looks of pity, words of comfort, and none of those were capable of changing anything.

So Hotaru shook her head. "No, there's nothing."


The ice cold water was refreshing. It took away the dirt and sweat accumulated from many days of travel, left a trail of goosebumps in its wake.

Is there really nothing?

'Nothing.'

Does that girl interest you?

'What kind of question is that?'

A question exactly as it seems.

She closed her eyes and let the tremor take over, savouring the chill that seeped into the marrow of her bones.

She's of interest to me though.

'A peculiar interest you have there.'

Well, that you used your powers on her deserves a mention. With that in mind, may I ask the reason why?

The strange sense of pain and pleasure was a reminder that she was still alive, still struggling to maintain her sanity in this world of lies and deceit. No, Mercury and the others were different. The politicians back in Saturn were the ones to be worried about, fueled by ambitions that had grown since Souichi left the stage. Hotaru struggled to control them, but her immature words were often met with dismissive hand waves; she could only watch helplessly as they continued to further rouse the populace.

'I am under no obligation to answer your questions.'

You're a cold one, Hotaru-san. We've been together for so long and you haven't changed your attitude toward me even once. Is it therefore so wrong for me to ponder why this girl has managed in a moment what I've been trying for years?

She didn't need to concentrate too hard to feel the girl's hands over hers, clasped in an exaggerated happiness. The Princess, she thought, was also different from all those old ministers who strived daily for riches. She was still innocent, pure, a child, and their brief moment of interaction was saturated with so many conflicting emotions. She wore her heart on her sleeve and had discarded all presence of superiority when speaking with her; rather, it did not seem like she was all that familiar with the workings between the different statuses. She was a bit of a relief to be around.

'Ponder all you want, I won't give you an answer.'

The normally silky voice gave a little noise of discontent. Your affections are well-understood. The Moon Princess gives off a familiar air that demands immediate attention even from me. If you decide to pursue this interest, I shall stand far from your way.

'...Mistress Nine.'

Silence greets you eagerly.


Over the years Hotaru learned that to paint your feelings in clear colours was to expose your desires and weaknesses for all to see. She therefore understood quickly that excitement, anxiety, and anger had to always be masked for fear that others may utilize the situation to obtain what they pleased. It had been proven that knowledge of this was essential to the security of Saturn's economical prospects. Having only recently emerged from an age stereotypically defined by whimsical wants, she could be considered pretty skilled in the art−apart from the occasional breach.

"Princess...?"

It was the morning's first intruder.

"Hotaru-chan!" After excusing herself from the nurse, the girl walked over to the doorway where Hotaru stood, still staring in surprise. The pink-haired royal smiled at her expression and curtsied in greeting. "Good morning. I was looking for you, you know. I'm sorry about running off like that yesterday without even a proper goodbye. Are you feeling better?"

Pink hair kept in odangos was certainly a unique sight, the white dress she wore could not be mistaken for a commoner's, and those shining red rubies were definitely the Princess'. It took a while to accept and once she did, it finally registered that the Princess was actually humbling herself before one of inferior status. 'Is it that she hasn't fully grasped the differences imposed by society? That's impossible, you can't claim that to this extent. Is it an act then, or is she doing this consciously?' "Good day, Princess, and I am most honoured that you came all this way to inquire about my health. I am unworthy of such treatme―"

The Princess was suddenly too close and Hotaru backed up instinctively into the hall to avoid any physical contact. Confrontations were inevitable in the world of politics and Hotaru had had her share of them, but something about touching the Princess seemed wrong. The feeling had surfaced when she helped her to the bed yesterday, that uncomfortable sensation and a heightened level of awareness. It felt awkward, and apparently the Princess was oblivious to this all because she grabbed a hold of her wrist and pulled her back into the room.

"What are you doing, Hotaru-chan?" she asked, frowning. She glanced at the little gathering outside and waved briefly before pulling the older girl away from the doorway and against a wall. She puffed her cheeks out in a pout. "I told you to call me 'Usagi', didn't I? It feels weird to hear you speaking like this when you're only a few years older than me."

Hotaru stared. Usagi's words helped keep her mind off the close proximity. "But Princess, to assume such familiarity is too disrespectful of me."

"Disrespectful in regards to what?" the Princess asked, her face suddenly removed from humour. She pulled back and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "You worry too much about our social differences, Hotaru-chan. What are they in the end? Trivial things that everyone seems to believe should restrict the people we befriend and the relationships with those we can. Look at us, Hotaru-chan: we're both humans, girls similar in age, and yet you insist on creating a barrier between us.

"It's the way the world works, Princess. It's a structure that has proven effective throughout the ages and to change it may result in a collapse of the system." Hotaru fought off the repulsion that welled up in her stomach; they were neither her words nor her beliefs, but it felt as if she had to say anything to get away from this kind invitation. She immediately took back her earlier thoughts. 'Relief?' This was not relief. Usagi emitted a presence that alarmed and forced her to sound pretentious and fake. She hated the feeling.

Usagi shook her head in disbelief. "You think on such a big scale, but if that's how you feel about it I won't force you anymore." She smiled brightly. "Though seeing as how you're up and arguing with people, I'll take it that you're feeling better?"

"Yes, thank you for your concern." Hotaru's eyes darted to the Princess' hand. "And yesterday's wound...?

"Ah." She proudly displayed a clean palm. "Surprisingly, it closed up pretty well by nightfall. I must have some kind of magical healing power or something. Then again, it wasn't that deep of a cut to begin with," she admitted, retracting her hand with a shy laugh. Hotaru watched as this progressed to a sudden interest in the ground, then a shifting of the feet, and she felt something pull at her inside. "But I'm glad you're okay now... Um, you aren't, by any chance, busy today, are you?"

There it was. What was this feeling and why was it throwing everything off? She had to remember her duty, the name with which she walked these grounds, but the Princess was pushing some kind of master button. It made her dizzy just trying to get a grip of it. "I have not yet received any special orders from the Neo-Queen, no."

"Neo-Queen...?" Usagi echoed, her brows creased in thought. "You tend specifically―Oh! I forgot about your cloak," and she allowed herself a moment's embarrassment. The garment was a status symbol among the servants, placing its wearer into a seat reserved for those who answered directly to Serenity. It was an honour granted to the dedicated and rarely ever handed out to the young; needless to say, it put Hotaru in a suspicious position but the Princess didn't seem to care for it.

"Well, that's great news anyways because I was wondering... Um... Well, I was wondering if you would like to accompany me to the market this morning?" Usagi laughed nervously and met Hotaru's eyes with orbs of glistening hope. "Please? You talk about us being strangers so this would be a good chance to get to know each other better, right?"

Hotaru bit her lip. Spending the day with the Princess was less than desirable, especially if her fluctuating mood was going to be present throughout. In addition to that, it was clear that the Princess would continue to pursue this acquaintanceship and Hotaru wasn't sure how well she could hold against her. Was it too late to come up with an excuse?

As if Usagi could read her mind, "Oh, you could also interpret it as an order from your Princess. I'll need some help bringing back what I buy."

That sealed the deal. "...Yes, Princess."


The fourteen-year-old was consciously trying not to stare. The Princess was sitting opposite her, chewing idly on a piece of fruit as she looked out at the marketplace scene. It was a beautiful day and the civilians seemed to understand this, taking advantage of the opportunity to visit the various vendors. The sounds of bargaining was prominent in this atmosphere, though the shouts of children and scolding mothers could still be heard. The sun shone brightly overhead but a cool breeze kept the temperature from rising too quickly, drifting even into the open restaurant in which they were currently seated. The Princess giggled as it caught her hair, and closed her eyes to accept the tease. Hotaru looked away.

In a last ditch attempt, she had tried bringing up the possible dangers of the Princess leaving the castle and was laughed off; a different hairstyle and change of clothes later, Usagi declared herself "unrecognizable". After making sure that the guards would keep their mouths shut, they snuck out of the castle, leaving no pause for breakfast. That was the reason why they were in the restaurant in the first place. The many dishes laid out before them, however, were the result of the manager seeing through the Princess' pathetic disguise and seeking to win some favour with the royal family. He had enough sense not to brag about it, but the show of overindulgence―an offering not only of ten varieties of grain but also fruits ranging from all shapes and sizes―had to be suspicious to the other customers. Top that with minor meat dishes and Hotaru was really tempted to throttle the man for being so careless.

"I'm sorry, this is rude of me, isn't it?"

Jarred from her thoughts, Hotaru looked up to find the Princess fidgeting sheepishly. She had changed into a simple woolen dress, pale blue in colour, and topped it with a gray cloak in an attempt to appear less conspicuous. Unfortunately, it failed horribly because of her decision to let her hair fall loose over her shoulders. It was one of the reasons why Hotaru found it so difficult to look directly at the Princess. She looked so striking with her hair down, so sophisticated and beautiful. Hotaru felt a tightness well up inside her again and tried to shake off the feeling. "Excuse me?"

"This..." and Usagi indicated the feast with a sweeping motion. "I tried to keep my identity hidden, but I guess it's not as easy as I thought. I'm sorry," she apologized again, bowing her head for emphasis. "I don't normally eat like this. Uh, if you'd like you can have... most of it. I really think it's way too much for something like breakfast."

The dark-haired girl averted her eyes, taking to ripping a piece of her bread and dunking it in the provided bowl of jam. The Princess must have mistaken her unwillingness to look at her as disgust. "It's nothing. I shouldn't be surprised that you lead a pampered life−necessities like food so readily available and in such luxurious qualities." She tried to savour the sweetness of the fruit blend against the bread's soft and relatively tasteless qualities, but she was too conscious about the Princess' eyes.

Usagi frowned in response. She suddenly pushed aside the overflowing plates before her and leaned across the table to pluck Hotaru's breakfast right out of her hand. In a manner befitting not a lady, she shoved the bread in her mouth and, after clamping down a few times, tried to push the mass down her throat. Usagi nearly choked and had to seek the assistance of a cup of water. When the little show was finished, she met Hotaru's questioning look in triumph.

"You didn't just...?"

"I'm just showing you that I can eat your 'simple' foods too." Usagi smiled and stole another piece of bread, dunking it thoroughly this time so that the jam painted the white canvas red. "I know that I can be considered fortunate−too fortunate even. My mother and father have both been splendid parents, and Pu has been an excellent teacher. I was raised almost completely in the castle with few outside interruptions, and I admit that without some field work I might not be able to assume my duties in the future. It also bothers me a little when I think about the people who struggle to get by yet here I am, purely on the grounds that I happen to come from a respected bloodline. I've done nothing great and I am praised left to right for it.

"What am I saying? You probably think I'm weird now." She tried to laugh it off when a thought struck her. "Ah! I'm sorry, Hotaru-chan, you probably come from one of those families too. I'm sorry for saying something weird."

"No, my family origins are better than you would think," Hotaru began, recalling her prepared fiction with ease. "I am here only because a distant relative recommended me as trust-worthy and I proved as such. It was not necessarily out of necessity."

"Even so, I shouldn't have just rambled on like that," Usagi insisted. "I'm sorry. I get caught up in my emotions from time to time. Don't know who I get it from, really; both my parents are so calm and collected. What about you, Hotaru-chan? What kind of people are your parents?"

The sudden shift in subject matter seemed a result of the Princess' eagerness to get off awkward ground; unfortunately, this wasn't the best path to go down either. The sense of guilt was immediately replaced with a longing for the gentle, beautiful woman whose figure existed only in memory; Hotaru did not welcome the flood of emotions that the Princess encouraged. Without answering the question, the fourteen-year-old excused herself from the table. She could feel the other's gaze fixed on her rising form, her grip as it captured her hand in mid-air, clasped firmly on her wrist.

A shrill of delight and an accompanying laughter of amusement...

"Sorry, I overstepped my boundaries," was the apology. Usagi had stood from her seat to stop her, forsaking the idea that they should continue to avoid eye contact. "That isn't the kind of stuff you ask someone you've known for only a day, right?"

Hotaru chided herself for acting so impulsively. There was no telling what would happen if she left the Princess on her own; she had come outside with her so she was responsible for her safety. "No, I was being too sensitive about it. I apologize for acting out of line. You may ask me any questions you wish, and I will answer them without hesitation."

A pained expression crossed the Princess' face and she shook her head, dropping her hold. "No, I should be sorry, Hotaru-chan. ...But could you please stop doing that? I'll respect your privacy so could you stop submitting yourself to what I want all the time? I know you're still stubborn about familiarity and all that, but if you keep distancing yourself like that I won't know what to do..." Usagi closed her eyes and took a breath to even out the shakiness in her voice. When she opened them again, there was a weak resignation hidden in their depths.

"I'm sorry, should we get going?" She took out her money pouch and left a few gold coins on the table. After thanking the manager for his hospitality, the pink-haired princess turned and proceeded out the door alone.

Hotaru stood for a while longer before what happened finally registered and she rushed out into the street. She ignored the few who had taken notice and scanned the sea of heads, fighting the anxiety that was building in her stomach. Why was she acting like this? Plagued by butterflies one minute, so quick to throw up her shield in another, only to instantly regret it? It would be easy to place the blame on the master-servant relationship, one that she had difficulty maintaining because of her stand-offish nature, but she knew that that wasn't all it was. The Princess... If she hadn't showed such concern, she could've masqueraded flawlessly a while longer. But the others―Mercury and them―tried to get her to open up as well, and she was never burdened with such inner turmoil. What made this so different?

She stumbled into the crowd and had to twist to avoid crashing into an elderly couple. She apologized before resuming her search, but the mess of bodies made it impossible to locate a lone figure. Merchants lined the streets with their merchandise and attempted to deal with customers eager for lower prices; those with a less dedicated gathering took to advertising with no reservations. The excessive noise was not helping her concentrate. 'The Princess came out here to buy something,' she reasoned, 'so it makes sense that she'll stay around here somewhere.' The problem was that she had no idea what the Princess came out to buy and couldn't see her anywhere. The fourteen-year-old resisted the urge to call out.

There. A flash of pink. Without worrying about whether it was actually hair, Hotaru pushed forward towards her only lead and ended up in front of a fruit stall. A middle-aged woman stood behind the structure and offered her a warm smile. Hotaru hesitated but nodded in return and turned to face the Princess, who was busy admiring an apple in her hand. She was rotating it several times and Hotaru took this to mean that she was purposely ignoring her.

"Princess," she started, lowering her voice as she addressed her. "I ask you to refrain from walking off like that. I serve as a poor escort, but please do not wander off on your own."

Usagi didn't look at her. "I'm sorry. If anything happened to me, you wouldn't be able to face my mother, right? I'll remember not to be so self-absorbed next time. Excuse me? May I get five of the red ones?"

Hotaru grimaced internally; the Princess was using her own tactics against her. A part of her argued that it was supposed to have been like this from the start, but something inside twisted in discomfort. She hadn't wanted to taint the Princess with her cold attitude―she just wanted to make sure that Usagi didn't get too close and latch onto something that could destroy her. The other girl, she realized, had to be smiling.

"Princess, you speak in a cynical manner."

"It's what you would have said in my place."

"Thank you for your patronage."

Usagi accepted the bag graciously. "Thank you for your kindness," and she was back on the streets. Hotaru caught up to her easily and grabbed a hold of her sleeve, which didn't warrant a pleased look. "You have some nerve laying a hand on your Princess, don't you?"

"I apologize, but you have to understand my position."

"No, I can't possibly understand," declared Usagi, pulling her arm free. She fixed Hotaru with hardened eyes. "I don't see why you're so against me treating you like a human being. Momo-chan and Kyusuke-kun were the same too, but it's like you're doing this intentionally. Like it's the last thing you'd ever want." The pink-haired girl suddenly looked away, but Hotaru had seen the tears that had begun to well up. "I'm trying my best to grin and bear it, but am I really that much of a bother to you? I'm probably just sticking my nose where it doesn't belong. It's not like I have a reason to stay by your side anymore, now that I know you're okay."

It was the perfect opportunity to break free. She didn't have to care about the Princess' feelings. She just needed to be finished with her duties here and go back home; the current situation left no time for them to meet causally anyways in the future. There was no point to getting her hopes up.

"Princess, I―"

"Runaway cart!"

The two girls turned to see said cart roaring down to meet them, its sides overflowing with vegetables. At a distance the owner of the cart was waving his hands frantically and there was much commotion as pedestrians scrambled out of the way, foregoing possessions in favour of their lives. Only Hotaru and Usagi remained on the path, in the middle of their conversation, as it tore through discarded stalls; they had a scream to thank to finally knock them out of their shock. Hotaru recovered first and she threw herself at the frozen princess without a second thought. Their bodies slammed into the dirt as the vehicle thundered pass, meeting an early end with a magnificent crash.


Written: July 30 - August 30, 2008.
Posted: November 30, 2009.